Sleeping was absolutely awful. I toss and turn the entire night. I ask Draco for more to drink, but he says if I am hungover the next morning, apparating will be an entirely worse beast than it was yesterday. When I wake with a shout and turn to look at him next to me, his eyes are open, and he is staring at the ceiling. There is a wand on the bed next to him the entire time we are asleep. He even wakes up before me. I wonder if he sleeps at all.

After getting ready to go, they arrive. Draco and Weasley get into an argument over who is taking whom. Weasley suggests I go with Granger, and he will take Draco and Potter. Draco would rather apparate alongside Granger with me, but Weasley absolutely refuses the idea. Potter then suggests that Weasley take us both, but Weasley's apparition skills are the worst of the bunch and Draco mentions something about splinching. It ends up with Draco and I travelling with Weasley anyway but Granger and Potter taking our luggage.

It's a whole entire hullabaloo for a trip that is practically instantaneous. I tie my hair up before we go in case we vomit when we land. We go, and the trip is awful, but I manage to keep my lunch in. Well, I suppose I already threw up yesterday's lunch. I haven't eaten in nearly a full day at this point.

Granger buys us the tickets, although Draco gives her the money. Soon enough, we are on the platform and then we board. There aren't enough people on the platform to really draw attention to us. Since Granger and Weasley don't have coats, I thought we would draw more attention. There is snow on the ground. I cannot imagine how cold they are.

Draco and I sit in a row near the back of the train car, while the others take a spot meant for four people. Our luggage remains in an enclosed area near the front. Draco's eyes dart around until the train begins to move.

He orders us food on the train. It comes, and I try not to eat it quickly. It has been so many hours since I last ate or drank. We are going to have to switch trains at a station in Glasgow. He explains that we will have to apparate to the home from King's Cross, but it is surely not very far, and it won't be for another twelve hours. Once more, I try to read. It hurts my head.

I press my head against the glass. My reflection is clear. There are bags under my eyes, and I look sickly. Yet, I can look. Never before have I felt worse, but I can see myself. It's uncomfortable to see myself in such a state, but not painful. My eyes don't ache.

"The erased memory wasn't the only spell someone put on me," I turn to Draco, my voice quiet.

He presses his lips, before nodding, "someone put a sort of charm on you that helped keep you hidden. I noticed it when you told me you couldn't look in the mirror. Well, I had always found you a bit hard to look at, to be honest, but I had assumed it was because you were a muggle. I don't usually spend time with muggles. I was wrong."

My chest feels hollowed out. Nobody ever noticed me, or ever remembered me. At least, not until well into knowing Draco. Almost overnight, I could look at myself and my friends seemed to care about me more. They said I looked happier. Muggles fill in the gaps about things. I was ignored, but it was because someone else hid me.

"Why hide me?" I ask.

"I assume someone was trying to prevent someone from finding you," he explains further. "The charm is a modification on a bedazzling hex. They are used to make things invisible, but you weren't invisible. You were ignored, or at the very least hard to look at. It seemed to be much more powerful than intended. The charm shouldn't have made you avoid yourself. It took me all night to undo it. Removing it might have been the reason Goyle was able to track you down."

"Are there any other spells on me?" I ask.

He shakes his head, "Granger probably would've noticed anything significant. It could be hidden like the memory charm. We'll keep looking into it."

I look at myself in the glass, tracing the outline of my jaw with my fingers. I had always assumed that I hated to look at myself because of what happened to me in Brighton. I guess, more than one bad thing happened to me in Brighton. Starting over is nasty business.

"Do you think they'll come after the people who knew me in Brighton?" I ask, looking over at Draco. "Goyle and his friends, I mean."

He shrugs, "perhaps. I can see if the Order can figure out a way to watch them. Your parents are named what, exactly?"

"Charles and Linda Miller," I tell him. "My brothers are Alfred and Aaron Miller."

"Anyone else?" he asks. "Any friends?"

"Matilda Bancroft and Imogen Enfield," I tell him. I bite my tongue, before adding, "Gaines Elffire."

He nods, before looking around, "I'll figure something out."

We continue on the ride in much silence. I sleep on this train as well, though my neck becomes stiff. We arrive at the station around lunch, and so all four of us order food at a café within the station. Granger's hands wrap tightly around the tea, trying to warm them. I feel quite horrid about all of this. We stretched out all the muscles in our bodies before we board the next train. We are lucky to get another secluded spot together.

Once more I read the book. I make it nearly halfway before I have to put it down, "do you know a magic cure for a concussion?"

"I'll figure one out," he explains. "It might be difficult, given how long it's been since you fell."

I fold my hands over the book in my lap.

"What was the war about?" I ask, looking over at him.

He stiffens, then adjusts himself in his chair. His head turns, but I continue to look. After only a minute, he looks back.

"It's complicated," he explains.

"Well, then I should find out sooner so that I have an opportunity to digest the information."

"It won't be right for your head."

Perhaps he is right.

"Well, we have several hours before we have to apparate again, so better now," I say, turning slightly so my knees are towards him. "I will continue to pester you about it until we arrive at King's Cross."

He grimaces, "fine. Just know I'd rather not say."

I assume he waits for me to interrupt. I don't. My lips are pressed tightly together.

"There was a wizard, the Dark Lord, who was quite powerful. He and his followers, the Death Eaters, supported pure-blood supremacy," Draco blinks, and then continues, "which essentially amounts to hatred for muggles as well as muggle-born witches and wizards. Granger's a muggle-born. Those three up there took down the Dark Lord themselves during the last year of school. They are perhaps the most famous and powerful witches and wizards living today. More famous than the minister, even. The Dark Lord himself cast the killing curse on Potter twice, and Potter lived both times.

"Regardless, the Death Eaters fought a group called the Order of the Phoenix. They were dedicated to preventing the Dark Lord from taking power. Eventually, Potter, his gang, and the Order all won the war. There are very few Death Eaters left. Goyle wasn't even in the inner circle yet, which is the only reason he isn't in Azkaban with all the others.

"I suspect that you know an Order secret. At least, something that the Death Eaters want to find out, even this far after the war. A Death Eater who thought you knew something would just kill you, muggle or otherwise. For Goyle to have recognized you, the memory charm would have had to happen over Christmas of 1997 or the next spring, since he was at Hogwarts the rest of the time. Perhaps even as early as the summer of 1997, although Goyle was training with me for most of the summer. I suspect it was Christmas."

Christmas 1997 was nearly two years ago now. I remember spending time with my family. I remember Gaines was on holiday, and his absence was so relieving. I didn't last in Brighton much longer after that.

Still, I piece together what Draco has told me. Those three magical people hate him, vehemently. They are on the side that won the war. Weasley doesn't trust Draco with Granger, who is a muggle-born. He wasn't welcome at the most unsavoury place in that wizarding town. Draco has been in hiding for quite some time.

"We're you in the inner circle of the Death Eaters?" I ask.

Draco's lack of answer is an answer enough. I look at the book again. He hates people like me. Why is he even here?

"Did you leave because you lost?" I ask. "Are you in hiding?"

"I left because they killed Pansy," he explains. "My side, anyway, not Potter's. Hiding in the muggle world was more difficult than I had imagined. I've still not used a telephone yet. I had to figure out how your currency works, how to dress like I belong, and all sorts of things. Basically, the opposite of what you are going through now. All I really had were muggle books to keep me occupied. Then, the books made you seem not so different from us. Same problems anyway."

All the information fits nicely into my head. It fills a space comfortably, with a little bit of room to move. If he shares anymore, I'm sure my brain will be stuffed and then I will panic once more.

"If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have made the same choices," Draco continues. "I took the dark mark when I was 16. That was when I joined the inner circle. Three and a half years ago, actually. Potter only trusts me now because I gave him information on how to track a bunch of prominent Death Eaters about a month after he won the war. Trials are still going on, but as far as I know, I'm the only one who isn't in a cell."

"Okay," I say, hoping he will not continue any longer.

His whispered words make my nose twitch. He joined a cause that seemed to have no qualms about murdering people like me. He seems like at least a somewhat different person than he was around then. Well, he certainly hasn't murdered me. Perhaps he is saving me to help avoid trial. I don't know enough to discern how dangerous his current situation has become.

All I know is that mine is substantially worse.

~~~~~

Oop. Stuff is going down. I really feel for poor Jane. Things are still also going to only get crazier from here. I kind of miss editing the Inverness days. Like, they were kind of sweet and this is a sort of catastrophe that neither Jane, Draco, nor myself are ready for. Are you ready to see their hideout? Or, what do you think about Draco's switch to a more neutral party post-war? Let me know in the comments!