Lani POV:

The busy sounds of the hospital filled the silent space between Shouto and I as we waited for the doctor to come in.

He was unconscious for most of the awkward, uncomfortable Uber ride here, and when he woke up, I immediately made the conversation about his fall, and the bloody bump that was already starting to form on the front of his head. From how dazed and groggy he'd been, I was wondering if maybe he'd gotten amnesia, forgetting the events that led up to him slamming his head into the counter. I could only hope to be that lucky.

I mean, look—not that I wanted him to have amnesia. I'm just saying, if he magically forgot everything he said to me at my apartment this morning, that would be fantastic—and too good to be true, I'm almost sure.

Because even if he'd been mostly silent once he was finally awake, I caught his glances at me every few seconds. And while Shouto isn't the easiest person to read, I could tell he had unspoken questions in his eyes, looking as if he was waiting for me to say something, to break the ice of whatever the hell happened this morning. But...

What the hell did happen this morning?

One minute, Shouto was kissing Ella, and the next moment, I was in the middle of a deal with Eiichi. Then I wake up to see that fucker never let himself out of my apartment after sleeping over uninvited—only to be greeted by Shouto who rambled about things that didn't make sense. Things that most certainly didn't add up to what I saw last night.

I've barely had the chance to come to terms with my own feelings about Shouto. Let alone, his kiss with Ella. Or what he just confessed to me hours ago. It all caught me off guard. And...

And, look, I fumbled this morning, alright. I showed him too much of myself and became too vulnerable. I let him get close, and allowed the heat of the moment to graze my fingertips with its dangerous flames.

"I think...I want to kiss you right now." I can still hear his words from this morning echoing into my ears, trying to suppress the butterflies it continued to give me.

Or, how badly I wanted to reciprocate.

Before last night, I wanted to be inside his head so badly, and now I regret it. But, I only regret it because it's going to make it much harder to stay away. To stay strong for both of us and ensure we get through hero season unscathed.

Shouto...has feelings for me. Or, at least, that's what it sounds like. He sounds just as confused about this whole thing as I am, but still, I picked up enough of his word vomit this morning to get the general idea. I'll admit, I'm surprised. Because he's Shouto and I didn't think he cared for this sort of thing. Because he could have anybody—anybody better, but is mistakenly focusing his time on someone like me. Someone so evil. So disgusting, and so...

'Ugly.'

I grimaced as the voices of the past tried to find their way back into my head, shaking them away before they could settle.

It was torturous as I continued to intentionally busy myself within the silence of the hospital room, pretending to take calls on my phone and check the same email from work—dated two weeks ago—like it was the most urgent matter. I did anything I could to ensure Shouto and I wouldn't have to talk about this morning. Mostly because I didn't have an answer to give him. I didn't understand it myself.

He continued to sit on the hospital table and watch me busy work in silence, lowering his eyes to his lap every so often with distracting thoughts—ones that scared me even though I couldn't figure out what they were.

A few agonizingly long minutes later, the door to our room finally swung open, causing me to sigh in relief and cease my fake phone call about the weather as I turned around to greet our doctor.

"Is he okay?" I asked immediately, glancing from her to Shouto with concern.

She smiled, setting down her clipboard and sitting in the swivel stool. "The scans show everything is normal. It's just a little concussion, but still, he's perfectly healthy. His samples showed no signs of dehydration, or anything that would cause him to faint. His blood pressure was slightly elevated when he first came in, but nothing concerning."

I sighed in relief and walked over to the table Shouto was sitting on, instinctively placing a hand on his knee. "I-I don't know what happened to him. One second he was up, and the next second...he was...down?" I grimaced a bit at my stupid, obvious explanation.

You know when you go the doctor as an adult and wish your mom was there to talk for you because you don't know what to say? That's how this moment felt, except my mother was horrible, so never mind.

The doctor snuck another smile as she glanced between the two of us. "Mr. Todoroki, do you have any idea what caused you to faint?" She asked.

I lightly dragged my fingers up and down Shouto's knee, watching him purse his lips for an answer. What caused him to faint? I don't really know myself. But, knowing Shouto and what we were about to do directly before he fainted, I had a pretty good idea of what led to it.

"I forgot to breathe." He concluded after a moment of silence, causing my head to fall between my shoulders with fatigue—Shouto fatigue.

The doctor nodded patiently, and I've seen that look enough times from people to know she was coming to her own misunderstanding about what he said. "That's actually not as uncommon as you think." She began rehearsing her spiel. "Shortness of breath is one of the main signs of anxiety-"

"Well, no." Shouto cut her off hesitantly, treading on his next words to clarify. "My breath wasn't just...short. It was...nonexistent. I literally forgot to breathe."

Yep. And there it is...

As expected, the doctor now looked thoroughly confused, blinking a few times as she looked Shouto up and down for any physical issues. Her chair slid over to her clipboard when she found nothing, taking a look at her notes once more.

"Hm. Well, I don't see anything wrong. It says here on your records that you went to the doctor at UA University almost a month ago complaining of chest pain. Is that correct?" She glanced up at him.

"Yes. And it's only gotten worse." Shouto said, causing my brows to raise in surprise.

I looked at him with a bit of concern, and also a little bit of annoyance. "I didn't know about your chest pain." I grumbled to him quietly.

Of course he didn't have to tell me about his personal problems. But, if it's about his health, I feel it would have been nice to know...

The doctor chuckled softly, looking between Shouto and I like a bickering couple before easing my worries. "Well, not to worry because the EKG we did on him today came back healthier than ninety-five percent of the human population. His heart is perfectly healthy."

I hummed in content and gave Shouto's leg a small pat, feeling his thigh muscles so prominent under his sweatpants—I need to stop!

"What do you recommend, doctor?" I finally removed my hand from his leg, and Shouto noticed, looking down at his empty leg quietly.

"He just has a simple concussion." She said before turning to Shouto. "Rest it off for a few days and stay away from bright lights, and you should be good as new. Oh, also try to reduce your stress for the next few days, Mr. Todoroki."

Shouto nodded and hopped off the table, causing me to gasp a bit at his quick movements. I murmured annoyances under my breath and grabbed onto his arm to ensure he was steady. "Don't overdo it." I huffed, causing him to furrow his brows.

"All I did was get off a table." He said blandly, hovering closer when I began adjusting the bandage around his forehead.

"No, that was a hearty jump." I grumbled, sweeping his tangled hair away from his cut.

His dual colored eyes watched me, alternating between my mouth and my face. "It wasn't-"

"It was-"

Our small bickering was interrupted by the musing hum of the doctor. Shouto and I jumped slightly as we'd clearly forgotten she was in the room.

"Aw. Couples like you two are my favorite. You can clearly see the love and care. It's heart warming." She fawned over, causing my eyes to widen.

"Oh—we're not-" I attempted before she was already halfway out the door.

"You're in good hands, Shouto. I hope you feel better soon." She said, giving one last wave.

Well that did nothing to quell the misunderstanding from this morning...

*

I jammed my key into the door of my apartment and sighed tiredly, kicking it open and leading Shouto back inside.

I hadn't let go of his arm since we left the hospital, and I resisted the urge to put my head on his shoulder in the Uber. I guess I was just worried for him. It's not everyday such a top notch hero gets bested by a...kitchen.

The knot on his forehead will definitely bruise, but with a few trips to his university kissy nurse, he should be good as new. Just in time for pictures and the fresh heroes banquet this weekend.

And, yeah, if Shouto was nothing more than my client, that's all I'd care about at this moment. I wouldn't have cared that he hit his head or even got a concussion, I'd just be thinking about ways to cover the damage so I could successfully flaunt him off for my own gain.

But, over the last month, he's softened me into melted butter because I didn't give a damn about any of that right now, leading him through my apartment like he was fully incapable of walking himself.

"Here, we'll just put you on the couch." I murmured, quickly kicking the television remote and an old notebook off the cushions to make room for Shouto.

He eyed me in question as I helped him sit down like he was an elderly person, and it was only once he was fully seated on the couch did I finally release my grip on him.

"Ah, there we go. Now stay." I ordered him like a puppy, going to my linen cabinet to pull a few items for him.

He followed instructions and rested more comfortably against the cushions, and it was then that I realized all this silence was starting to kill me. For a man of such few words, I didn't think I'd really notice these silent moments much anymore.

I sighed heavily as I sorted through some pillows and blankets in the cabinet, finally breaking the ice. "You didn't tell me you were having chest pain all this time." I kept my eyes on the linens with focus.

Shouto let out a small hum, speaking faster than I was expecting as clearly he'd been waiting for us to have a conversation all morning.

"It only started when I met you." He said, causing me to scoff softly.

There's the sassy Shouto I know...

"Hah. So you're blaming me?" I smirked a little.

I glanced back to see he was already looking at me, watching his eyes quickly dart away. "Well. Yes I am." His voice remained blunt and stoic.

With a roll of my eyes, I rose to my feet, walking back over with the blankets and pillows in hand. Shouto remained sitting on the couch as I stood over him, looking up at me with eyes that made my stomach flip before I dropped the pile of fresh linens in his lap.

"Yeah, well I've been getting more headaches since I've met you. So, does that mean I can blame you if I have an aneurysm?" I crossed my arms tauntingly.

He blinked a few times and kept his gaze on me. "I mean, you can try. But, I'll think you'll be unconscious from that before you can think about blaming me." He said.

I narrowed my eyes and barely made out the softening of his features to let me know he was making a rare joke, biting down on my lip as a smile tried to ghost across it.

"Lay down, smart ass." I mused, nodding to the couch.

He did as he was told, adjusting the pillow and blankets to his comfort before settling back into them. "Good. Now let me get you some water." I brushed past him.

But, my heart jumped as I felt the warmth of his fingers brush against my wrist before I could go, halting in my tracks and looking down at him.

"Lani." He murmured my name softly, so soft, it threatened to melt me into a puddle on the floor.

He doesn't say my name very often. But, when he does, it just makes it sounds that much more special. It makes it sounds like such a pretty name coming from his mouth. His fingers continued to graze my wrist gently and I couldn't stop myself from giving in, taking a seat on the cushions right next to his torso.

The warmth of his body seeped into mine, and the urge to climb under the blankets with him was overwhelming. But, I restrained myself, or as much as I could, looking at him with caving resolve. He kept his eyes on me while his fingers closed around my wrist, and I let him, simultaneously wanting him to do more and also stop before it went any further.

"I don't want to see her again." He murmured tiredly before his hair began to stick to his forehead bandage again. "Ella. I...I don't want to go on another date with her again."

And while I shouldn't have felt relieved by his words, the selfish part of me was. Because every time I hear the word 'Ella' now, all I can think about is last night. Her lips on his, and it drives a stake through my heart. Even if Shouto said it didn't mean anything, it still hurt. And even though I was meant to find him a date, I didn't want anyone else to have him.

It's all getting too complicated now. Especially after this morning...

His fingers slipped off my wrist when I lifted my hand to brush his hair away from his forehead, but he didn't seem upset. More content actually as his eyes began to fall heavy from my touch.

"Okay, you don't have to see her again." My voice came out gentle, and it's only a voice I use for him. One instinctively reserved for when we're alone. "Though, I already emailed Yuna about the success of your date this morning. I'll have to backtrack now. Can you give me a reason why it didn't work out just so I can document it?"

His lids slowly began to close as I stroked through his hair, sighing softly and letting his head settle back into the pillow. "Um. This morning...is my reason." He tried with hesitation, making my heart drop now.

Because this is exactly the topic I was afraid of, and why I've been avoiding a conversation with him all morning. It's too dangerous to even talk about because I don't trust myself to have the strength to resist it. To resist...him.

I couldn't resist him this morning. The only thing that saved us was Shouto fainting and concussing himself. Ironically.

But, now we're back to this, and Shouto doesn't understand the concept of letting things go unsaid, especially things like this that could be detrimental to us both. Does he even understand how horrible this is? Our feelings for each other? No, of course he doesn't. Because he doesn't know who I really am, and if he did, he'd despise me.

Yes, that's the reality. Don't forget. Stay strong...

With a deflated hum, I stopped stroking his hair, lightly grabbing both sides of his face in my hand and bringing his attention back to reality.

"...that's not a valid reason, Shouto." I said, wanting to cringe at the obvious disappointment creeping into my own voice.

Unfortunately, it was obvious to Shouto as well. The man who's not supposed to understand social cues has grown quite perceptive of mine, it seems. He furrowed his brows, and the innocent confusion on his face made my heart shatter in two.

"Oh. Why?" He practically trailed off, letting his gaze fall slightly.

I clicked my tongue and pondered, absentmindedly resting my hand atop his chest. It was warm, so warm, and I could feel the steady beats of his heart drumming under my fingertips.

"What?—because—well, I'm your publicist. And....I-I already said to you that this morning was nothing more than you being confused." I tried to explain, cursing the betrayal of my voice.

It sounded so soft and so not serious. It would confuse anyone, especially Shouto. But, I couldn't find it in myself to be blunt and strict with him. God, I'd let him get away with anything. He's just...my soft spot.

"So, you didn't want me....to kiss you?" He clarified quietly, making me hesitate on an answer.

Because of course I did. I wanted him to kiss me this morning, and last night, and the day before that. I wanted to kiss him now, I wanted to kiss him until our lungs filled with the other's air. Until our lips were swollen, and our minds were blissed out in a lustful, wanting haze. I wanted to climb on top of him and kiss him for hours, to memorize his taste and the shape of his lips. I wanted to run my hands down his toned body and bite his bottom lip until he moaned. Until he grabbed my hips and begged for more. Until his fingers snuck under my shirt and he finally got the courage to take it off.

And then I wanted to feel him. Every single part of him, on me and in me. With his hands in my hair and his lips on my neck. I wanted to hear his voice in my ear, to hear him repeat every single thing he said to me this morning again, and again, and again, until I fell over the edge and he followed me there. Until it was just him and I, alone in our little tranquil bubble, away from everything that keeps us apart.

"No, I didn't want to kiss you." My voice came out exasperated, having a hard time getting through every word of the sentence. "And you didn't want to kiss me either. You're just confused. There are plenty of other people in the world you can kiss. Better people than me, okay?"

And, yet my own heart betrayed me once again, letting my fingers graze over Shouto's chest—watching him watch me do so. He looked so comfortable as I ran my hand down his body, so aware of it. So...wanting of it.

"Why do you always talk about yourself like that?" He asked.

I swallowed heavily as my fingers reached the deep divots of his abs, forcing my hand to stop there. "What do you mean?"

"You....you always just, I don't know, make yourself sound like the worst option when it comes to most things." He said, causing my heart to jump. "And, I don't think that's true. I think...well, I just think....it's actually the opposite. Um, in my opinion."

I don't know when he learned to read me so well, but it only made me realize how honest I've unintentionally been with Shouto. About myself and who I am. It was too easy to be vulnerable with him, but more than that, it was too easy for him to say the right thing, melting my heart with his innocent honesty.

It was all just too much for me. God, it was too much. He was just too good for me.

"Listen..." I breathed out with a single strand of willpower remaining, trying to push him away however I could. "We are going to win hero season. And then, when we have no more reason to spend every waking moment with each other, you are going to lose interest me in, okay? Because you will understand that someone like me is not made for someone like you. I promise you, that will happen, and you will be so glad I put a stop to this before it went any further."

"I don't think that will happen. I think about you every day. Most of the day actually." His honesty made my heart flutter.

I groaned softly and lowered my head to hide the slight heat rushing to my cheeks. God, what is wrong with me? I haven't blushed since I've been a schoolgirl, but for some reason, Shouto managed to make it happen without even trying. Literally.

"You also have a concussion, so none of your thoughts are rational right now." I mused lightly, desperately trying anything I could to push him away.

But, deep down, my heart couldn't forget his words from this morning, or even right now. Because I had feelings for Shouto, and evidently, I had it bad. And now that I know he feels the same...it's going to be a lot harder to stay away.

Inhaling deeply, I pulled myself out of my thoughts and shrugged the blanket up to his chest, too distracted with him to prepare for the events of today. "I have to get to work and fix the Ella situation. I still don't know what I'll say, but I will figure it out. You can stay here and rest, okay? You'll have to order delivery though. There's not really anything in the fridge."

"Okay. Are you coming back after work? When can I expect you?" He asked, unknowingly giving me a bitter taste of the reality I kept trying to ignore.

"There's....something I need to do after work first." I said, remembering the Mizuchi deal I agreed to tonight. "But, then, I'll come home to you."

And the guilt set in quicker and heavier than it ever had as Shouto nodded and immediately dismissed my words as the innocent truth. Because he trusts me. He trusted me so easily. He'd believe anything I told him, and I always said it wouldn't be good if he fell into the wrong woman's hands.

That woman...is me.

"Can I...spend the night this time?" He asked, causing my willpower to finally crack.

Because deep down in my heart, I couldn't let the door close completely. I couldn't cut him off, I couldn't push him away...

...and I couldn't stop myself from leaning forward, brushing his hair away from his forehead and replacing the open space with my lips. My eyes closed as I kissed his head, feeling the warmth and softness of his skin atop my lips, savoring every bit of the action.

And for a man who seemed so unsure of where to put his hands last night when he was kissing another woman, both of Shouto's hands came to rest on my lower back so effortlessly. And I allowed it, because I was just too weak.

"Yes, Shouto. You can spend the night."

*

A/N: you guys can always read ahead on Patreon! I posted a free preview on Patreon so you can see where those readers are currently at. It's an exciting part of the story. See you soon!