ADORA - PRESENT DAY 

There are three reasons why I chose Scranton.

One, I live here. Well, my dad lives here, but he's in Brazil with Maggie for their one-year anniversary, so our house is empty.

Two, Elaine needed to get away. The campus is buzzing with the news of her pregnancy. I was afraid she would have done something to herself had I not taken her away.

The third reason is entirely selfish.

We stand at the entrance to the Poor Richard's Pub. The clock ticks 11PM; it took four hours to reach this place. The night is warm and thick. Air particles are filled with some excitement, and so am I.

"What exactly are we doing here?" Eric's gaze lingers on my cleavage shamelessly.

Something shifted in him the moment we entered Pennsylvania. It's almost as if being away from Harvard freed him. No one knows us here, no one can rat us out.

"Drinking." I go through my phone.

"Uh, I'm not twenty-one." Elaine tugs at the sleeve of my dark green Balmain dress.

I text the owner, who happens to be my dad's high school buddy.

"Adora got in when she was sixteen." Eric answers. "You'll manage at twenty."

This is the bar where Eric and I first kissed five years ago. That's my third selfish reason for choosing Scranton. Maybe a part of me wants to recreate that night.

Maybe I want to finish what we started five years ago before he leaves me. Eric understands me too well, and a small smile lifts up the corners of his lips every time he looks at me.

My phone pings, "Alright, we're good to go."

Josh and Eric go for the door immediately.

"Maybe I should just call it a night." Elaine doesn't move. "It feels weird going in. I don't feel so good and I don't think we should-"

"Nonsense." I lock my arm with hers. "This is the best idea I've had all week."

"Adora." Her voice only slightly changes, but it's enough for me to realise just what she's trying to communicate. "Graham's funeral was yesterday. Don't you think it's a bit... inappropriate?"

Eric and Josh wait by the entrance, they can't hear us anymore.

My eyes meet hers; hazel to blue, excitement to reluctance.

"I'll quote the great philosopher Shania Twain." I pull her with me. "The best thing about being a woman is the prerogative to have a little fun."

Elaine lets out a little chuckle, shakes her head and follows me to the bar.

Poor Richard's pub is packed. Fortunately, dad's friend saved a table by the window for us and four pints of beer are already waiting for us to slide trough the crowd. The interior is wooden and warm, full of old-fashioned stools and tables; bottles of colourful liquor decorate the walls. There's a bowling track and a dance floor. It's all in one.

"I honestly can't imagine you here." Josh grins at me while he drops in the wooden chair. In the first sip, he drinks half of his pint.

"What?" I take a sip of beer. "You thought I'd take you somewhere fancy?"

"Fancier." Josh salutes. "But this is fine, too."

Eric sits next to me, "Adora and I made out here. She's nostalgic."

"Not everyone has to know." I squint.

"Wait, how long have you two been...?" Josh wisely doesn't finish his sentence.

"He's talking about before." I roll my eyes. "Five years ago, when I wasn't with Mark yet."

"You made out with him before you were with Mark?" Josh is awfully curious and it's not sitting well with me, but I nod anyway.

"Adora doesn't like to address it." Eric snickers.

Josh's eyes slightly widen, "Are you two, like, into each other?"

Nervousness jolts through my spine. Beer gets stuck in my throat and I cough it out. Eric grins and shakes his head like he's brushing Josh's question off.

I wish he would answer. I wish he would tell me what he's feeling. I wish I knew what I'm feeling.

Josh glances between the two of us, "Man, that's kinda..."

"Mean? Selfish? Kind of whorish?" Elaine squeezes her pint of beer; she hasn't taken a sip yet.

Josh nods.

"You're not drinking." I look at Elaine.

Eric's hand is on the backrest of my chair and I try to focus on something other than the closeness of his fingers.

Elaine sighs, "I'm pregnant."

I know she doesn't want to talk about the appointment she asked me to make, nor I'd ever try to push this conversation in the middle of the bar, but her reluctance is telling.

Fortunately, Josh is even more socially inapt and unapologetic than me, "You gonna keep it?"

"Dude." Eric shakes his head. "Read the room, will you?"

"What? It's a question."

"I don't wanna talk about it." Elaine's blonde hair covers her eyes.

Awkwardness settles between us. Elaine looks uncomfortable and sad. Beer is sliding down my throat quickly.

"Alright." Josh calls the waiter. "We'll do shots instead."

So, we do shots. Vodka replaces beer. Tequila replaces beer. At some point during the night, Elaine takes her first shot. Four more follow immediately after.

She's laughing at something stupid Josh said. My brain is foggy. All I can think about are Eric's fingers brushing my skin and my phone incessantly ringing in my small, black Dior. It's Mark.

Some people saw me leave Widener Library with Elaine. Fortunately, no one recognized Eric since he stole Robert's cap, they assumed he was a driver.

It doesn't even matter, because me leaving the school with Elaine is enough to ruin my reputation, as Mark puts it.

I glance at the messages.

I told you that you shouldn't hang out with that girl. Are you crazy? Where are you? Why aren't you answering your phone?

When Eric and Josh leave outside for a smoke, Elaine leans over the table, "You look like you're going to throw up."

"I might." I admit and drink more beer.

How does it go? Beer before liquor makes you sicker, liquor before beer, you're in the clear. Which one did I drink first?

"What's wrong?" Elaine asks and I wave with my phone.

"Mark keeps calling."

The blonde's mouth drops, "You didn't tell him you're here?"

"We were supposed to meet up tonight." I whisper. "Katie, Jimmy, Melissa and other NPCs, but I skipped. I can't fucking stand them. It's been, like, three weeks since Mark and I hung out alone."

"Why are you doing this?" Elaine nods towards the entrance, where Eric disappeared to. "Is it sex? Revenge? Or do you really like him?"

My vision blurs, "All of the above?"

Elaine leans against the backrest, "You're playing them both. And you're kind of enjoying it."

My chuckle is humourless, "I'm not the nicest person to be accused of murder with."

"You have a decision to make." She says. "Or you're going to lose them both."

I salute without a word.

"It's not too late to stop." Elaine keeps talking. "You haven't slept with Eric. If you tell Mark you two made out a little, he'll forgive you. You know he will. I mean, you'll ruin their friendship forever, but you'll be fine."

"I know." I nod.

That's what scares me, as well. Mark will forgive me. God knows what else he'd forgive. And it's easy to sin when you know you'll be forgiven.

"If I choose one, I'll lose the other." My shoulders jump up and down.

The girl on the other side sighs too loudly, "You can't keep them both!"

"I know, I know."

Elaine looks at me over the rim of the glass, "You're going to fuck it all up, aren't you?"

A smile pulls my lips up, right as Eric and Josh return. Eric extends his hand towards me without a word, and I'm still looking at Elaine as I get up.

Elaine tugs at my sleeve and whispers, "It's not too late to stop."

I lean towards her, "But I don't want to stop."

Whatever Elaine wants to say disappears in the music. Eric pulls me to the dance floor. My heart beats in my chest, music beats in my ear. Eric's hands touch my waist, ever so slightly, gently.

I lean into his touch; excitement grows in my belly, mixing with alcohol. Feeling his body so close to mine is blurring my thoughts. Memories of the last time we were here flood my mind.

We weren't supposed to kiss, we weren't even supposed to be here together.

But much like now, I wanted to escape and Eric was always there whenever life got too complicated. He's my refuge, my safe haven, the place where no one can find me.

He spins me around; his hands slide over the front of my dress. I move my hips in the rhythm, purposefully grinding against him. Eric's laugh reverberates against my ear and he plants a small kiss on my neck.

I'm afraid being with him would ruin this idea of running to him. He would become a part of my life; he would become subjected to regular problems, and soon enough, I'd find myself running from him.

This beguiling, dreamlike idea of him would crumble under the weight of the real world.

Eric's hands explore my body shamelessly, like we're alone in the bar. Mark is always too afraid someone's watching, too worried what everyone's going to think.

When a slower song comes on, Eric turns me around and places his hands on my waist. I'm leaned against his collar bone and I'm breathing in the scent of his aftershave.

My heart is trashing against my ribcage, unable to decide what it wants me to do.

"Mark called me." I murmur, deciding to break this too-enchanting moment.

"He called me, too." Eric mumbles back, his lips are brushing against my earlobe, sending shivers down my spine.

"What?" I step slightly away from him.

"He asked me whether I knew where you were." Eric shrugs, but I'm already walking back to our table. "Adora, come on, I said I didn't know."

"Yeah, but he called you." I fish out the phone from my purse, startling both Elaine and Josh. "Which means he thinks I might be with you."

"Is that so bad?" Eric shouts, startling me.

I meet his eyes, "Yes."

Cold settles between us.

"Alright, then." Eric turns around and walks away from me, disappearing in the crowd.

"Fuck." I curse and check my phone. Mark sent dozens of messages.

Elaine and Josh are staring at me like they're watching a show.

I type a message to Mark. I'm in PA, needed to get away. I'll call tomorrow. I throw my phone back into my purse and scurry through the crowd to find Eric.

Elaine and Josh offer confused stares, but don't comment.

He's outside, leaned against the wall, smoking. His jaw is clenched, his brows slightly furrowed. There's tension in his expression, and even an ounce of pain that I'm too afraid to analyse.

Instead of sobering me up, the chill air makes me realise just how drunk I am. I focus on the cars passing by, their rhythmical movements give my drunk mind a needed pattern and nausea slightly passes.

"You're mad at me." I mumble, trying my best not to slur.

I did not need that last tequila.

Eric inhales the smoke, "Why would I be mad at you? You've only stolen this tiny, black heart I have and ruined my friendship. And you took my drugs."

"Oh, fuck you." I cross my hands on my chest. "You've ruined my relationship and then told me you never wanted to see me again!"

A gush of smoke momentarily hides his eyes, "I didn't say I never wanted to see you again."

"You've implied it."

The worst idea crosses my mind then and I steal his cigarette. The moment I inhale, my entire world flips upside down. I'm too drunk for this. I cough out the smoke and give the cigarette back to him.

Eric arches his eyebrow, "Are you okay?"

"No." I lean against the wall, appreciating the cool facade on my naked back. Tears gather in the corners of my eyes. "I don't want to lose you."

Eric tenses and takes in a sharp breath.

"So, are we, like, into each other?" The attempt at humour doesn't quite reach his voice.

"Maybe." I need water. "Look, I'll... I'll leave you alone. I screwed this up enough. I'll take us back to Harvard tomorrow and I'll give you your drugs back-"

Eric takes my hand and pulls me closer. His lips brush mine, slowly first, then more deliberately. His tongue tastes like tequila and smoke, his hands are warm on my body. The dizziness passes, lost in the heat.

Our foreheads touch, "Do you wanna get out of here?"

I swallow the sudden fear, "Yes, please."