Light sat in front of me, arms on my shoulders.
His eyes were raking over me, looking me up and down - I know he didn't mean anything bad by it, but I couldn't help but try cover everything else.

"Y/N." He said slowly, pulling his jacket off to slide around me.

"Please just.. don't. I want to go home, shower, and sleep in my own bed. This didn't happen, okay?" My voice cracked at the last bit, as I started crying again.

This time I pulled him into me. He was warm, a comfortable warmth that I needed right now, as I sobbed into his shoulder.

"Y/N come on you heard the intercom- huh? Light?" Misa asked, looking inside.

She was confused as she stared at me gripping onto him, but my red face and puffy eyes gave it away, as her gaze softened up, taking me from Light's grip, and holding me herself.

"Y/N, hun, come on, let's get you home and cleaned up, okay?" Misa smiled gently, helping me to stand.
But my legs couldn't stop shaking, as she supported me up, slowly walking out the back.

A black car with tinted windows was parked out the back, as Light opened the door for me, I instantly went inside.

"Y/N." A voice rang out, as I saw Ryuzaki in the passenger seat.

"Are you okay?"

All I could do was shake my head, as Misa pushed in beside me, holding my hand in hers.

Just as L had promised, I went home. My real home, not the fake facade of a room I had been living in prior.

What did he think I was going to do after that? If I was Kira, I would kill that sick son of a-
What was I thinking? Murder is murder.

My Mother was still awake, and I had gotten changed before entering so I wasn't still in lingerie.

She noticed I had been crying, but I think she believed it was because I missed her - of course I did, but that wasn't why.

She helped me into the bath again, like she used to when I was a younger child.
I sat in the tub until the water became icy, just listening to myself breathe.

By the time I fell asleep that night, the night was gone, and was replaced by the chirping of the birds.

I didn't feel like getting up after that.

"Ryuzaki." Detective Sato began, storming into the office a few days later, as Matsuda had finally spoken about what had happened that night.

L had already heard an earful from the Chief, and from Light, and Misa, so this was doomed to come.

It all just made him feel more and more guilty for something that he could've controlled - what an idiot he was.

L just avoided his gaze.
"I'm sorry, truely."

"You tell my kid that. I haven't seen them all week, and I heard the night was a fucking failure anyway! My kid was assaulted and all you can say is you're sorry? That doesn't cut it, not one bit." He glared, as Soichiro placed a hand on his colleagues shoulder.

"L didn't expect that to happen. I'm to blame as well, I consented to the idea." He said, as Sato dropped his shoulders.

"I just want my child back. I'm sure you understand. They're not themselves anymore." He said silently.

L felt horrible, but what could he do? He didn't know how to comfort people - hell, he didn't really know how to talk with people under normal circumstances.

But he thought he ought to owe you something, so later that day he organised with Watari to go by your place.

After explaining he was a colleague, your mother let him in, as he made his way to your room.

He knocked, but received no answer.
So he pushed his way in, seeing you laid out on the bed, staring at the roof.

"Y/N." L said quietly.

I flinched, staring at him.

"Did something happen? I know I haven't came back I swear I will soon-" I started, but he shook his head.

"Don't worry about it. You're off the case, Y/N. You don't have to help anymore. Recover yourself, go back to school. You'll be okay, and you can go back to normal." L said, smiling ever so slightly.

"People don't just go back to normal after these sort of things. I found myself thinking that if I were Kira, people like him I would kill first. No normal person thinks like that." I said, scoffing. "I'm ridiculous."

"Y/N, you're in pain. People get through grievances and traumas differently to others. It's okay to think those things."

"Is he.. is he at least guilty? Or was using my body not useful enough?" I asked, choking as I felt tears well up again.

"Well what did he tell you?"

"That he would get me fired... and ruin my life if I didn't strip." The tears flowed down. Why was I such a crybaby?

"That's proof enough in itself. I'm quite sure that he is Kira, but we will have to do some more investigations. But don't worry about it anymore, this doesn't concern you anymore." L said, turning to leave.

"Please stay. I know I'm just a work partner, but you're the first person to come and see how I am...
so thank you for that." I said, looking at him with a smile.

He smiled back. "You're welcome Y/N, but it's the least I could do. I believe you may be one of my very first friends."