Wei Wuxian clung to Lan Wangji a little longer before facing the daunting task of greeting his shidi and shimei. This should have been something he looked forward to. He loved his shidi and shimei. He always had fun teaching them and goofing around. It was always good. Until he saw them die. Wei Wuxian took a deep breath and reconstructed the person he used to be.

'Just for a little while. Just enough to put them at ease. I can do it for a little while.' Wei Wuxian repeated to himself silently. Wei Wuxian led the way to the training grounds. Along the way he pointed out things and places to Lan Wangji. He was chatting excitedly, but Lan Wangji could still hear the anxiety threaded through Wei Wuxian's voice. Lan Wangji didn't comment. He knew Wei Wuxian was trying to distract himself, hoping to get through the coming interaction without too much trouble.

Lan Wangji knew that this would be hard for Wei Wuxian no matter what. Whether he successfully passed himself off as fine or not. Lan Wangji had no way to know which option would hurt less. He didn't know how badly this would hurt Wei Wuxian. It was possible it could be worse than Wei Wuxian expected. It was also possible that Wei Wuxian's anxiety was running through a worst case scenario that wasn't going to happen. Since Lan Wangji didn't have these answers all he could do was cooperate with Wei Wuxian's desire to distract himself and stay close in case he needed to intercede on Wei Wuxian's behalf.

"Shixiong!" The first excited exclamation was quickly followed by a chorus of disciples repeating the address. Lan Wangji was the only one close enough to see the slight tensing of Wei Wuxian's shoulders before he turned to the disciples with a bright smile.

It took a lot of effort for Lan Wangji to hold himself back and not stop the horde of disciples from rushing to Wei Wuxian and smothering him in a series of hugs and tackles. There were many cries about how much they missed Wei Wuxian, and chattering voices talking about things that happened while Wei Wuxian was gone. Wei Wuxian responded in a bright tone as he began to tease the young disciples in an animated voice.

No matter how bright and cheerful Wei Wuxian sounded right now, Lan Wangji knew that wasn't how Wei Wuxian was feeling. Wen Qing had warned Lan Wangji that Wei Wuxian was very good at pretending he was okay. Only now did Lan Wangji realize the true extent of that. In the months at Cloud Recesses Wei Wuxian had never put on such a show. It filled Lan Wangji with a mixture of feelings. Joy and pride that Wei Wuxian was willing to be honest and vulnerable in Cloud Recesses. Pain and anger that Wei Wuxian did not feel safe in Lotus Pier. Lan Wangji had found a very particular feeling steadily growing in his chest. A dark and seething hatred.

Lotus Pier had been Wei Wuxian's home, and Wei Wuxian did not feel safe there.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

Lotus Pier was known to be a free and open place. Cloud Recesses had three thousand rules regulating behaviour, but Wei Wuxian was more free and at ease there than he was in Lotus Pier.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

Lotus Pier had Wei Wuxian for years. Years to raise him, treasure him, and accept him. Wei Wuxian did not feel treasured or accepted. It was obvious because Wei Wuxian was very clearly not used to those things.

Lan Wangji hated Lotus Pier.

"Is anyone going to try these and let me know how they turned out?" Jiang Yanli's voice carried across the noise of the disciples crowding around Wei Wuxian. Suddenly the crowd of disciples was all running eagerly towards her. Each one trying to push past the other to get their first. Lan Wangji saw Wei Wuxian let out a small shaking breath of relief before he again bounded forward with fake energy.

"Jiang Cheng!" Wei Wuxian called brightly. Lan Wangji did his best not to immediately scowl and stand in between them. Wei Wuxian scampered over to the YunmengJiang sect heir and hooked an arm around his shoulders in a sort of sideways hug.

"You're back? Did your boyfriend get sick of you?" Jiang Wanyin spoke in a snarky tone, raising an eyebrow at Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji wanted to punch him. He really really wanted to punch him. Wei Wuxian laughed, but Lan Wangji could hear something in that laugh. It was something very small that Lan Wangji could not clearly explain, but a feeling in his stomach told him that it wasn't a good thing.

"Course not! I'm very likeable." Wei Wuxian protested playfully. Lan Wangji wished Wei Wuxian believed that. Jiang Wanyin rolled his eyes.

"Whatever, it isn't like you're getting married tomorrow. He has time to figure out what he's gotten himself into." Jiang Wanyin jabbed as they walked and chatted casually. Even as they bantered in a way reminiscent of the interactions Lan Wangji had seen when the two first arrived in Cloud Recesses, Lan Wangji did not find anything reassuring about their interactions.

Instead Lan Wangji found his anger towards Jiang Wanyin growing into hatred. It could not be helped. No matter how much Wei Wuxian cared about Jiang Wanyin, Lan Wangji could not find anything to like about the YunmengJiang sect heir. Whether he knew it or not the words Jiang Wanyin were so casually spitting cut deep in Wei Wuxian's mind. Too often these casual remarks were striking on Wei Wuxian's insecurities. Probably more than Lan Wangji realized since he hardly believed he knew everything Wei Wuxian felt insecure about.

Wei Wuxian claimed the sharp words were fine. He acted like the playful punches were a good thing, but all Lan Wangji could see was someone hitting his fiance. Playful or not, Lan Wangji could not see someone punching Wei Wuxian without being angered by it. Lan Wangji knew this was going to be difficult for Wei Wuxian, but he had not realized how taxing it was going to be for his own self control.

"We were going to practice archery next. The competition is only two weeks away. You've probably gotten rusty after sitting around Gusu for months." Jiang Wanyin spoke, obviously trying to bait Wei Wuxian. Wei Wuxian frowned playfully.

"Please, have you ever beaten me in archery? How rusty do you think I have gotten?" Wei Wuxian replied with a smirk.

"Come on then." Jiang Wanyin challenged. Soon Lan Wangji was watching as the disciples all took turns between flying kites and shooting arrows at them. Wei Wuxian at first was going from disciple to disciple assisting them in correcting their posture and giving them tips. It was the first Lan Wangji had seen of Wei Wuxian's smaller, more genuine, smiles since they left his room. While Wei Wuxian was still more tense and uncomfortable, at least to Lan Wangji's eyes, it was unmistakably similar to the smiles Lan Wangji had witnessed when Wei Wuxian was instructing Jiang Yanli.

After a while Wei Wuxian was dragged into shooting as well. Lan Wangji had never seen Wei Wuxian's archery skills before. It was impressive. Lan Wangji was one of the best archers in the GusuLan sect. Lan Wangji found himself looking forward to the archery competition in a way he had not before. He wanted to see Wei Wuxian's skills in action. He wanted to compete by Wei Wuxian's side and see who might win. Lan Wangji didn't actually care which of the two of them won. It was more the desire for the challenge of competing beside him.

As he continued to watch, Lan Wangji could admit that Jiang Wanyin was an excellent archer. Excellent, but Jiang Wanyin still paled in comparison to Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji took a great deal of satisfaction in seeing Wei Wuxian's skills. The way he took down targets that were so much more distant than Jiang Wanyin. Lan Wangji could easily tell what Jiang Wanyin's biggest problem was. His problem was that he was trying to compare himself to Wei Wuxian. He was insistent on trying to do better and making too many decisions in the effort to achieve that.

In Lan Wangji's mind this was stupid. Wei Wuxian was making decisions based on his own skill, what he knew he could do. He was trying to push himself to continue to do better. Jiang Wanyin was not thinking in terms of what his own abilities were. Nor was he simply trying to push the limits of his skills. All his decisions were around trying to outdo Wei Wuxian, which in Lan Wangji's mind was just a way to guarantee failure. Lan Wangji would be lying if he said he did not feel a certain amount of satisfaction at the unhappy expression on Jiang Wanyin's face when he lost the self imposed competition.

Lan Wangji was less happy when Jiang Fengmian arrived and began to quietly observe the archery. It wasn't that Jiang Fengmian was doing anything wrong, Lan Wangji just didn't like him. Actually Lan Wangji did not like any of the Jiangs, save Jiang Yanli. While Lan Wangji had some moments especially early on where he was unhappy with her. Unhappy because all Lan Wangji could see was that everyone Wei Wuxian grew up with had failed him. However, Jiang Yanli had spent months preparing food for Wei Wuxian and talking with him. Especially when she started coming to Wei Wuxian to train, Lan Wangji could see the relationship between the two of them strengthening.

Lan Wangji at first had felt that Wei Wuxian was holding Jiang Yanli up on a pedestal above his head. Wei Wuxian seemed to idolize her while lowering himself. When Jiang Yanli came to Wei Wuxian asking to start training their dynamic began to shift. Lan Wangji was not certain if Wei Wuxian was even aware of the change. Lan Wangji could see it in the way Wei Wuxian interacted with her. There was a casualness and liveliness that Wei Wuxian began exhibiting around Jiang Yanli that previously was not there.

Before Wei Wuxian would joke with her, but it was always quiet and childish. Not simply playful childish, but like a child seeking attention from their mother. Now Wei Wuxian's childishness was more varied and playful. He became comfortable correcting her and giving her suggestions, where previously Wei Wuxian only just agreed or pouted. Lan Wangji had a difficult time describing the change. It was hard to put into words what he was seeing, but it felt like over those months they became more like siblings than they had been before.

Seeing Jiang Yanli put in effort and watching the bond between her and Wei Wuxian change had earned her Lan Wangji's respect. She was the only one who had earned Lan Wangji's respect. Although they were now in Lotus Pier nothing Lan Wangji was seeing was improving his attitude towards Jiang Wanyin or Jiang Fengmian. The reality was that Lan Wangji only cared about the lives of those two, because he knew it would hurt Wei Wuxian if they died. As far as Yu Ziyuan was concerned, even Wei Wuxian's pain was not enough to make Lan Wangji desire to protect her life. She caused entirely too much pain while alive for Lan Wangji to feel like her death would be anything but a net positive.

Lan Wangji considered that for a moment. No one ever told Lan Wangji that falling in love would make him violent. Yet it was undeniable that Lan Wangji's experience of anger, hatred, and the desire to do harm to others had all magnified exponentially since Wei Wuxian came into his life. Lan Wangji had been surprised, but he did not regret the change. Lan Wangji loved Wei Wuxian. Wei Wuxian made him feel alive and complete.

The need to be with Wei Wuxian was like the need to breathe. Every minute apart was a minute that Lan Wangji was suffocating. Wei Wuxian made everything worthwhile. This made Wei Wuxian more important than anything else in Lan Wangji's life, because life before Wei Wuxian did not feel like life anymore. It made all the sense in the world that Lan Wangji would wish to destroy anything that might harm his reason for living.

"That's enough training for today. It's time for dinner." Jiang Fengmian said warmly. Everyone smiled happily in response to this, but Lan Wangji was fighting the urge to frown. Wei Wuxian had wanted a break before dinner, but never took it. Wei Wuxian was chatting away with his arm wrapped around Jiang Wanyin's shoulders. Lan Wangji did his best to keep himself calm. Wei Wuxian had asked Lan Wangji to trust him, so Lan Wangji would. He would follow Wei Wuxian's lead. Lan Wangji reminded himself of this and silently promised to get Wei Wuxian back to his room immediately following dinner.