It took only a few seconds for Jiang Yanli to lead them to a secluded walkway, at which point Jiang Yanli sighed in relief. She gave Lan Wangji an imploring look. She glanced towards Wei Wuxian and back to him. Lan Wangji needed no more prompting than that. Lan Wangji took Wei Wuxian's hand in his own. Wei Wuxian's skin felt cool to the touch. Lan Wangji could feel a light tremor radiating through Wei Wuxian's body.

"Wei Ying." Lan Wangji called gently. He brushed his thumb across Wei Wuxian's knuckles in a soothing motion. Wei Wuxian closed his eyes and took slow deep breaths. Wei Wuxian leaned his forehead against Lan Wangji's shoulder.

"I... I need a minute before..." Wei Wuxian's voice was breathy.

"How about I take you both to your room, A-Xian? You can rest for a bit." Jiang Yanli inquired gently. Wei Wuxian nodded quietly. After a few more seconds Jiang Yanli led them towards Wei Wuxian's room. Lan Wangji noticed a few disciples who saw them. A few had taken a few steps towards them. Lan Wangji glared at them, causing the disciples to quickly change their minds about approaching.

'Wei Ying is not ready yet. I'll keep them away until he is.' Not to mention Lan Wangji did not especially like sharing Wei Wuxian's attention with other people. Lan Wangji understood it was a necessity, and there were some people who bothered Lan Wangji less than others. That didn't mean Lan Wangji had to like it. They arrived at Wei Wuxian's room without incident. Jiang Yanli led them inside, seeming to take a moment to collect herself.

"Shijie..." Wei Wuxian said quietly. Jiang Yanli looked up immediately when Wei Wuxian called her. "Thank you for earlier, with Jiang-shushu." Wei Wuxian half whispered. Jiang Yanli stepped forward and hugged Wei Wuxian.

She would have been lying if she said that taking charge of the conversation and interceding between Wei Wuxian and her father was easy for her. It was not, but it was also exactly the type of thing she was trying to get better at doing. Wen Qing and Luo Qingyang had both encouraged Jiang Yanli to learn to speak out more. They were both strong and confident in their own ways, and Jiang Yanli found she did wish to be a bit more like them. Specifically like them, not like her mother.

Wei Wuxian had barely said two words to Jiang Yanli's father. It was clear to her that Wei Wuxian was struggling in that interaction. This was exactly the kind of situation she wanted to be able to step up during. So she swallowed her anxiety and did her best to cover for Wei Wuxian and end the conversation as quickly as possible. Wei Wuxian had been frozen in place. Jiang Yanli could only get him to start moving by gently pushing him towards the door.

Jiang Yanli could only guess what might be going on inside of Wei Wuxian's head, but she didn't need to know the answers in order to be able to help. She knew what she had been doing before was not enough support. If it was, Jiang Yanli couldn't help but think that Wei Wuxian would not have arrived at the point of seeking his own death. Jiang Yanli wanted to do more. She didn't want to just be someone who could offer a few comforting words.

"A-Xian..." Jiang Yanli said softly. She held Wei Wuxian until he pulled back with a sigh.

"I just need a few minutes. I can greet Jiang Cheng and the disciples then." Wei Wuxian, sounding like he was trying to convince himself. Jiang Yanli smiled gently at Wei Wuxian.

"A-Xian, take as much time as you need. I can keep them distracted." Jiang Yanli said gently. She gently pat Wei Wuxian's head. "Just come to the training grounds when you're ready." Wei Wuxian nodded in agreement and Jiang Yanlie gave him one more smile before she left, presumably to make sure no one enthusiastically stormed Wei Wuxian's room.

"Wei Ying..." Lan Wangji called gently. Wei Wuxian's expression faltered. Slowly Wei Wuxian turned and walked into Lan Wangji's embrace. Lan Wangji's arms wrapped around Wei Wuxian automatically.

"Jiang-shushu... he's alive..." Wei Wuxian said in a small broken whisper.

After months of spending time with Jiang Yanli, Wei Wuxian had slowly been able to fully embrace in his mind that she was alive. Eating her cooking, chatting during meals with her, and training her for months had helped the memory of her pale bloody corpse fade. Her death was no longer the first thing that came to his mind when he saw her. Instead it was the sight of his Shijie wielding Subian as she trained under his instruction. It was something he had never gotten to see in his first life. It was as though this life was giving him the chance to get to know a side of her he had never met.

Wei Wuxian was aware Jiang Fengmian visited Cloud Recesses, but Wei Wuxian never spoke with him. Wei Wuxian actually didn't recall even seeing him. Lan Wangji was the one who informed him that Sect Leader Jiang had stopped by a little while after Madam Yu had left. Wei Wuxian's memory was a little fuzzy regarding that time. He remembered the yelling, and Lan Qiren asking Madam Yu to follow him. He vaguely recalled someone wrapping him in something soft, something that smelled like Sandalwood.

After that all Wei Wuxian remembered was being held in Lan Wangji's arms. He remembered pain and grief pouring out of him in tears as Lan Wangji anchored him. He recalled coming back to himself and the world around him, held in Lan Wangji's arms. Held in the best place in the world, the safest place in the world. Wei Wuxian felt himself relaxing automatically as he was once again focusing on the feeling of being held. Wrapped in the fragrance of sandalwood that seemed to radiate from Lan Wangji. Wei Wuxian basked in the feeling of warmth and comfort.

"I guess I'll probably be useless today. Already reacting this much to Sect Leader Jiang... How will I handle all my shidi and shimei?" Wei Wuxian said in a tone of self mockery. Lan Wangji frowned.

"Wei Ying is never useless." Lan Wangji said firmly. Wei Wuxian paused, his expression softening into a small self conscious smile. He had been trying not to talk badly about himself so much, but it was so second nature that Wei Wuxian frequently found himself doing it without any awareness. Lan Wangji didn't like it, and had been getting very good at calling Wei Wuxian out when he did it.

"I forgot." Wei Wuxian said quietly. He had to fight back the urge to apologize. Lan Wangji had made it very clear that 'sorry' and 'thank you' were not to be used between the two of them. Lan Wangji kissed Wei Wuxian's forehead gently.

"I will remind Wei Ying." Lan Wangji said softly. Wei Wuxian smiled.

"You are too sweet." Wei Wuxian whined lightly. Wei Wuxian took a few steadying breaths. "Alright, let's get the rest of the greetings over with. I have a feeling I am going to need as much time as possible to calm down before dinner."

Lan Wangji was not certain he liked that sentence, or the slightly forced energy in Wei Wuxian's tone. He had already seen the strain that had been put on Wei Wuxian when getting through the market. Wei Wuxian was not the same as he was before. He was no longer as comfortable in crowds, or at the focus of so many people's attention. Wei Wuxian was trying to act like everything was the same as before. It was not the same as before, nor should it be. Things before helped get him to the future that had left him suicidal. Things should not be the same. They should change.

"Lan Zhan. It won't be for very long. I can do this." Wei Wuxian said softly as he observed Lan Wangji's expression.

"Wei Ying." Lan Wangji said with a small sigh. "You shouldn't have to." The statement made Wei Wuxian smile. He kissed Lan Wangji softly.

"I... I like hearing you say that." Wei Wuxian said slowly. His instinct had been to say thank you. Not saying 'thank you' was hard. It forced Wei Wuxian to try and express what he was feeling with other words and that was so much more work. Wei Wuxian had the urge to pout and complain, but he knew Lan Wangji really liked hearing how he was feeling. Which made Wei Wuxian feel like he couldn't really complain, because doing this was something that made Lan Wangji happy.

'Alright Wei Wuxian. You can do this. You can explain to Lan Zhan why you feel like you have to do this.' Wei Wuxian coached himself silently. Wei Wuxian took another deep breath to steady himself.

"It feels easier to just get through meeting and talking with everyone while pretending things are the same. The alternative means having to see their reactions. If I act differently than how they expect me to... it won't be something they just calmly accept, and those emotions will hurt me. Every sad, concerned, disappointed, and angry response will be something I feel guilty for..." Wei Wuxian's voice sounded so weak and quiet and he hated it.

Wei Wuxian wasn't even certain what he was saying made sense. How could he explain that he could almost feel the guilt that would come from the startled and concerned expressions? If they saw his eyes fill with terror, or saw him shrink back from their hugs, they would be so concerned, and the thought of all of their concern coming at him from all sides made Wei Wuxian feel like he was drowning.

"Not Wei Ying's fault." Lan Wangji said gently. Wei Wuxian gave Lan Wangji a watered down smile.

"I... I know you believe that... and I... I'm trying to believe that. I promise I'm trying." Wei Wuxian insisted desperately. "But the guilt I feel is real, and it hurts." Wei Wuxian said, ignoring the tightening of his throat as he spoke. He tried to keep talking and explain. Explain that the idea of adding more guilt to his heart hurt more than the idea of pretending he was fine. The words were stuck. He couldn't get them out of his throat.

"Wei Ying." Lan Wangji said softly, his voice full of affection. Wei Wuxian buried his face into Lan Wangji's shoulder and let himself embrace the warmth and comfort of the arms that were holding him. "I'm here. Whatever you decide. I will be with you." Lan Wangji said softly.