Lan Xichen had fully intended to immediately check on Wei Wuxian. He had only planned to stay in the Hanshi long enough to settle himself after the conversation with his uncle. Settle himself, and perhaps think of some more things to do or say should this last conversation prove insufficient.

'That conversation was certainly insufficient. At best you have protected Wei-gongzi for his current stay. How does that solve future problems should he and Wangji decide to elevate their relationship?' Lan Xichen felt dejected.

In his mind the uncle who raised him had been a bit overly strict, but with good intentions. When his uncle did something Lan Xichen considered extreme, he still believed it came from a place of care and concern. This foundational belief seemed to be eroding beneath Lan Xichen's feet. Lan Xichen felt a deep sense of unease. It felt like everything he might have been certain about was suddenly becoming questionable. He steadied his breathing and tried to recenter himself, but Lan Xichen found it very difficult to find his normal calm.

He felt disturbed and unsettled. No matter how much he tried to set the issue aside his mind circled back to the behavior of his uncle. It circled back to the overreactions. It circled back to the judgemental tone. It circled back to the way he dismissively spoke of Wei Wuxian's suicide attempt. And then it drew him back to being a young child understanding that his mother had taken her life. A cold sour feeling rose in Lan Xichen's stomach. Had his uncle ever spoken of Lan Xichen's mother like that? Had such ideas and words been used to dismiss any concerns about his mother? Was his mother dead because of similar words?

Lan Xichen finally gave up on achieving calm before leaving the Hanshi. By now he did not know how many hours he had spent trying to calm down. Trying and failing. His mind only continuing to spin with one disturbed thought after another. Since calming down was not an option he could only do his best to fein calmness. He would just have to work through issues as they presented themselves. He was not going to become calm with some quiet time to himself as he usually would. Clearly being alone with his thoughts was not doing him any favors right now.

With this in mind Lan Xichen left the Hanshi with every intention of going immediately to the infirmary. Lan Xichen had not gotten very far when sounds of sour laughter suddenly drew his gaze toward one of the pavilions. A figure was slowly climbing to their knees and bowing low to several standing figures. On a normal day Lan Xichen would have maybe been concerned and calmly gone to inquire over what had happened. Today was not a normal day. Today Lan Xichen was filled with guilt and regret over his previous inactions. Today he was filled with anxiety over innocents dying because of willful ignorance.

These restless anxious feelings had Lan Xichen's feet carrying him toward the pavilion before he had made any conscious decision. It was only once he arrived that he recognized the figure who had just straightened to a standing position.

'Meng-gongzi. He came with Nei-gongzi. I thought he had returned already.' Lan Xichen now felt another spike of shame to add to the growing swirl of negative emotions. He did not even know what guests were here. How could he protect those he was responsible for if he didn't even know who they were? Lan Xichen internally cursed his negligence.

Once Meng Yao saw Lan Xichen approach he immediately bowed low and did not straighten. In Lan Xichen's current state, he could not bear such a show of deference. Almost without thinking he reached out to gently take hold of Meng Yao's arm. He pulled Megn Yao up towards a standing position. The sound of malicious laughter was still trailing behind the receding backs of the three guest disciples.

"Meng-gongzi, please wait a moment." Lan Xichen said before he continued after the three who had just walked away. When Lan Xichen caught up with them he did not even ask what had happened. At the minimum they had laughed at someone who had fallen. At worst they may have caused the incident. Lan Xichen had always been perfectly calm and perfectly polite. He addressed everyone with kindness and never raised his voice in anger. Yet, right now that person felt far away. Lan Xichen not only didn't feel calm. He also felt like maybe that always calm, always kind, version of him was culpable to crimes unknown. Was he always kind and patient to the people who did wrong like his uncle had? In doing so he allowed their behavior to continue. Was he being kind when he allowed his uncle to bully Wei Wuxian, a boy who tried to kill himself yesterday?

Using what was probably the most severe tone any disciple had ever heard him speak with, Lan Xichen sent the three boys to kneel. The three had looked terrified. The look on their faces had further unsettled Lan Xichen, but at this point his heart and mind were already a mess. Lan Xichen turned his focus to Meng Yao. His expression was openly worried as the anxiety that accompanied all of his thoughts spilled onto his face. Every anxious spiral he had circled this morning seemed to be replaying itself again. That anxiety was being compounded now that he could clearly see the small trickle of blood on Meng Yao's forehead.

'Our GusuLan Sect is known for righteousness. How can so much abhorrent behavior be taking place? How can our three thousand rules of conduct be violated for the detriment of others so easily? How could I ever think myself fit to be the sect leader? Look what is taking place right before my eyes! I willfully ignored what Shufu was doing to Wei-gongzi. What else have I ignored? How many people are suffering from my negligence?' Lan Xichen was lost in the chaos of his own thoughts. He did not see the look of wonder on Meng Yao's face.

"Come. I'll take you to the infirmary." Lan Xichen said quietly. Meng Yao tried to protest, but Lan Xichen was not his usual self today. He paid no mind to the complaints and firmly insisted on having Meng Yao checked over by a healer. All the while his face was filled with deep concern.

While a healer checked Meng Yao over and treated his cut, Lan Xichen did his best to pull himself out of his own spiraling thoughts. Now was not the time to think about everything he had done wrong. There would be time to reflect later. By the time the healer was done Lan Xichen had almost managed to school his expression back to a look of calm. He felt a small sense of relief when Meng Yao was only given some pain medication and cautioned that he may experience some headaches for the next few days. At least he had helped this time. It was a start, and all things considered an easier start than what his main focus of today would be.

"Zewu-Jun. Thank you for your kindness." Meng Yao said, bowing as soon as the doctor left them alone. Lan Xichen shook his head.

"There's no need for thanks. Would you tell me what happened? I only saw a little bit at the end. It's important for me to have the full story when I assign their punishment." Lan Xichen felt his tone was almost back to normal, perhaps a bit softer than usual. Most people wouldn't notice, and if they did it would probably be thought of as him being gentle with someone who had just been hurt. They wouldn't know the change was the result of his own turbulent emotions and regrets. Emotions that were forcing him to force his calm instead of being it. For the first time in his life he wished he had a bit of Lan Wangji's tendency to have his voice sound empty. Even when he was filled with emotions they often barely reflected in Lan Wangji's voice.

"It was my mistake. I wasn't paying attention where I was going and accidentally bumped into them. I fell." Meng Yao's face held a small vulnerable smile.

"And they laughed at you?" Lan Xichen inquired. Meng Yao looked away as though trying to think of an excuse. Lan Xichen frowned and let out a sigh. "Meng-gongzi, do not make excuses for them. Their behavior was inappropriate and disrespectful. Inappropriate behavior should be punished accordingly regardless of who does it and who it is directed to." Word Lan Xichen should have considered before he had allowed his uncle to bully a student for months.

"They did laugh at me because I fell, and said some... cruel things to me." Meng Yao said slowly. His head was lowered and he glanced up apprehensively at Lan Xichen as though trying to gauge his reaction. Lan Xichen put a hand on Meng Yao's shoulder.

"They will be punished appropriately. If you have any other problems please come to me. You are a guest here the same as them and should be afforded the same respect and privileges." Lan Xichen tried to sound reassuring. He hoped his words were encouraging. Meng Yao ducked his head while smiling shyly.

"Zewu-Jun. You live up to your reputation. You are righteous and kind. I am not here to study though. Chifeng-Zun only asked that I stay on for a bit to ensure Nie-gongzi is taking his studies seriously this year. I will be leaving in a few weeks to return to my duties in Quinghe." The entire time Meng Yao spoke he kept his head ducked shyly, but his eyes never left Lan Xichen's face.

"What I said still stands. You are a guest whether you are here to attend the lectures, or to keep an eye on Nie-gongzi. Please inform me if anyone else mistreats you. I could not bear it on my conscience if such things continued."

'I really can't bear anyone else to be hurt because of my negligence.' Lan Xichen added silently.

Lan Xichen was spared from the thoughts his mind might have spiraled to by the sound of a door opening towards his left. Lan Xichen might not have paid attention except he was acutely aware of who was in a room in that direction. The reason he had left his Hanshi in the first place. He turned to look and saw Wen Qing leaving Wei Wuxian's room.

"Wen-guniang," Lan Xichen turned to Meng Yao once he had her attention. "Excuse me, Meng-gongzi. Please feel free to rest here as long as you'd like."