Chapter 16 - "I'm finally legal, Chloe."

   In the next few days, my thoughts were plagued with Zane. Though he'd left before I got back to the living room with some excuse I had no will to ask about, he hadn't left my mind in the worst way. The nightmares I'd experienced so many times before coming back with a vengeance hadn't helped my clogged thoughts in any way.

Luka and I had proceeded as normal, save for the fact that he'd confessed his love to me and seen me at my most vulnerable. He hadn't voiced his questions but I saw them in his calculating green eyes whenever we were together. He knew I'd come to him when I could, but I couldn't right now. Not about this.

I couldn't tell him how scared I was for my well being after seeing Zane in my place of residence. I'd thought I'd escaped him back in Vermont where he was from, but instead Brad had informed us he was visiting his brother for the summer. I refused to admit that I may be in danger since Zane had a hunger for revenge against someone I'd never even met.

He'd told me that much.

That coupled with the hatred he had for me was a recipe for disaster I would not get my family and friends involved in. Not unless I had to.

Luka and I had spent more time together, whether we played on his Xbox or watched movies or went to the beach. We basked in the glory that was not working while the people we lived with had to continue their day jobs. Owen had even found a girl to date I hadn't yet met, though he'd showed me a picture and she looked strangely similar to Zoey. She wasn't famous like he was which shocked me even more considering he was very publicly involved with many actresses and models over the past couple years.

We'd gotten word that Matt was released from Aurora and would be heading over soon earlier in the day, and the knock on the door was what had Luka springing off his seat next to me on the couch. He opened the door to reveal his mom, brother and sister and I smiled over at them.

"Mamá! You're early!" Luka exclaimed as he pulled his mom into a hug and placed a kiss on her head. He was so very obviously a Mama's boy and always had been, which warmed my heart.

Nothing was better than a man who appreciated his mom.

My crippling anxiety was forgotten momentarily as I was pulled off the couch by none other than Matt who'd completely bypassed his older brother to pull me into a bone crushing hug. I smiled, wrapping my arms around his frail body as he breathed in a breath of relief. He'd changed a lot but was still sickly thin, a side effect of the many medicines he was on. He looked a lot like Luka with the same green eyes they'd gotten from their mom.

"I missed you, Chloe."

"I missed you too, Matt."

"Mateo! Say holá to your hermano!" Matt's mom snapped, her Spanish accent making her words sound menacing. She sauntered over towards me, pulling me into a tight hug as she sighed. "I missed you, Chloe. Mi niña hermosa, I missed you."

Usually their mom neglected to use Spanish when in my presence so as not to make me feel left out, but I knew that one. My beautiful girl, it was something she always referred to me as growing up and I revelled in the fact that she hadn't stopped.

"I missed you, Momma Sanchez." I'd tried to say Mama how Luka and Matt did, but the Spanish wouldn't roll of my tongue so easy so I made my own nickname for her. Everyone had followed my lead at that, and that's how she was referred to from our group.

"You left me," she mumbled with a sniff. "And Mateo and Sofía."

At the mention of Sofia, I smiled fondly and looked over to see she'd changed a lot as well. She'd probably changed more than Matt, if I'm being honest, because she was only nine when I'd seen her last and was now a teenager. She was beautiful though, the same great looks the rest of the family had, except she had the chocolate eyes she'd inherited from her dad.

She walked over, wrapping me in a hug and I smoothed down her hair as I hugged her back. I'd always wanted a younger sister, and Sofia had been that for me growing up. She was quiet though, very reserved and completely opposite from her temperamental older brother and her outgoing eldest brother.

Luka's mom told us she and Sofia wouldn't be staying as long as she'd thought. Sofia was in girl scouts and their troop leader had decided last minute to take them on a retreat. I frowned at that as I'd been excited to spend time with my second family, but I understood. She asked if it was still okay if Matt stayed here, to which we replied of course, and soon her and Sofia were excusing themselves to leave.

When they pulled off Matt, Luka and I sat in the living room and Luka shook his head at his brother. "Really man? A switchblade?"

Matt shrugged, a gleam of amusement dancing in his bright green eyes. "He fucked with me."

"Language," Luka reprimanded softly. He always had a fatherly tone when handling Matt, since his outbursts often required what he didn't have readily available. The remembrance of their dad leaving when Sofia was only a baby and Matt was five made me angry, but I pushed it away. They were angry enough for all of us.

Matt looked over at me, smiling his crooked grin he was known for. "I'm finally legal, Chloe."

"Watch it Matt," Luka warned with a teasing tone. "Switchblade or not I'll have you on the ground in two seconds flat."

"No doubt about that," Matt mumbled, shaking his head.

"No girlfriend for you, then?" His brother asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Matt mimicked the movement. "Not all of us have a girl we've been in love with all our lives, Luka, so no."

I blushed at the statement, averting my gaze to my chipped nail polish as they bickered. It wasn't long before Chris sauntered down the stairs in a pair of sweatpants and a shirt and he smiled at the sight of Matt. "I missed you little bro."

Matt smiled. "I missed you big bro."

Luka grumbled to himself, shaking his head and cursing in Spanish. I knew those words, for sure. "Feeling the love, guys, thanks. Not like you have a real brother or anything. El Culo."

"You're an ass!" Matt roared. "You're the one who gave me the damned switchblade to get me sent to that God forsaken-"

"You're the one who chose to use it maliciously, Mateo."

At the sound of his full name, Matt's eyes darkened. The only one to use his full name was usually his mom since he didn't like it. When Luka used it he was trying to get a rise out of Matt. And most of the time, it worked.

The tension in the room could be cut with a knife, but Zoey barging through the door in her scrubs like she owned the place made it subside. She plopped down on the couch roughly, her shoulder bumping mine harshly as she sighed heavily.

"Long day?" I asked rhetorically, but she answered anyway.

"The longest. Bunch of hopeful candy stripers showed up, wouldn't do a damn thing but ogle the doctors."

"They're called junior volunteers now, Zoe," I told her, but my words fell on deaf ears as she grumbled to herself.

Matt smiled over at Zoey, a longing look in his eyes and I felt bad. Matt had always had a crush on Zoey, but she was four years older than him and I knew it would probably never happen. "Hey Zoe."

"Matt!" Zoey cried, flinging herself on top of him and hugging him. I felt a twinge of pain in my heart seeing it, knowing Matt would read more into it than he should.

He smiled, wrapping his arms around her. "You never visit me anymore. Get off me, you smell like sanitizer and death."

"What a delicious combination," Luka mumbled, crinkling his nose. "Zoey go take a shower."

She shrugged lightly, hopping off Matt. "Can't, sorry, I don't have my stuff and I'm moving in!"

"What?" Luka spluttered.

Zoey giggled, shaking her head and I didn't miss the way the happy look in Matt's eyes deflated. "I'm kidding, but I am staying here. They're fumigating my place and Owen already approved it. So you'll be seeing a lot more of me, and a lot more of Brad."

She wiggled her eyebrows at the mention of her boyfriend, and Matt frowned, but I couldn't even force the sympathy to surface due to the fact I was hyperventilating. More of Brad more than likely meant more of his brother, since he was staying with him. I couldn't bare the thought of spending more time with Zane; the first time had been more than enough.

I excused myself, jogging up the stairs and heading towards my balcony. I needed the sea salt smell of the ocean to clear my senses right now as memories and thoughts swirled around in my head.

You're so gorgeous, Chloe.

No. Stop.

This is real love, Chlo Stick. You should feel lucky.

But I didn't. Not in the slightest.

Love is pain.

It really wasn't.

My thoughts physically caused my head to hurt and I grabbed my hair in an attempt to stop the words barreling around in my head. They always came without warning and all at once and it felt like I couldn't breathe. I was so tired of panic attacks I could scream.

The tornado of emotions in my head caused my breathing to quicken and it only subsided when I felt a gentle hand in my hair. I looked over to see Chris, which was a shock considering I'd expected Luka. Chris wasn't the touchy feely type, normally.

"Sis, what's going on?"

I sighed heavily, staring out to the waves that were crashing the shore with heavy force. "What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean."

I couldn't tell Chris. If I could tell anyone, it wasn't Chris. He was a police officer, a great one with high potential and one wrong move would have him losing his job. He loved his line of work, and though he worked to put the criminals away, I had a feeling his personal feelings would outweigh the precautions he'd need to take as a cop.

"I can't talk about it."

He sighed, raking a hand through his hair to tousle it. He glanced over at me. "Is this about the wedding? As the maid of honor you should know the details are already ironed out."

"I know they are," I dismissed. "It's just some personal issues."

Chris frowned but nodded. For a twin, his telepathy sucked the majority of the time. "Will you tell me eventually?"

Would I? I pondered the question internally, wishing like hell an answer had come to me immediately. Chris was my brother, my twin at that and I should trust him with anything. And I did trust him, I trusted him to carry my secrets to his grave but I didn't trust him not to go off on a tangent if he ever found out the full extent.

In fact, I think all three boys I'd grown up with would topple over each other in an effort to wring Zane's throat if they ever found out.

And that's why I couldn't tell them.

They wouldn't realize this was more than high school drama; I knew them better than that. They'd see red, blind rage and completely throw caution to the wind. But we weren't teenagers anymore and all three of them had something to lose.

Owen was famous, sure, but that meant he was a public figure. Any word he'd beat someone up for seemingly no reason and there went any chance he had to star in any further movies. If people were scared of him or disliked him, they'd refuse to watch anything he was in and ratings would go down if he was hired.

So he wouldn't be.

Chris was a police officer, a literal figure of the law and he'd not only be reprimanded and severely punished for his actions, but would lose his badge. He'd lose the chance he'd always wanted, to make a difference in society. He loved being a cop and I knew he'd be crushed if he lost his job.

Which he would.

Luka was in the army and not currently deployed, but one wrong move during his leave could spell disaster for him. Not only would his sergeant kick his ass from here to China, but he could risk getting dishonorably discharged if he was to do something bad enough.

And knowing him, he would.

Gia and Zoey would tell the guys immediately if I told them, so I couldn't go to them, either. I was between a rock and a hard place with nowhere to turn to but myself. But the definition of insanity was doing the same thing and expecting different results, so I knew I couldn't keep it bottled up to myself forever.

That was like lowering my own casket six feet under, jumping in and bringing the dirt with me.

I'd have to tell someone in time, but only after I knew they wouldn't let their anger blind them. The guys acted impulsively, they always had if their numerous amounts of detentions and suspensions were anything to go by. My ex boyfriend could tell you just how far the lengths Luka would go for me were, since he'd been on the receiving end himself.

Women matured faster than men, that was a scientific fact. We thought with our brains, while men thought with their fists. If I thought what Luka had done to my ex for just cheating on me was bad, I couldn't imagine what he'd do to Zane for everything he'd done to me.

Someone would leave in a body bag.

And it wouldn't be Luka.

So I shrugged in response to his question, my voice coming out hoarse as if I'd been sick for three days and I replied softly. "Maybe someday."