Chapter 15 - "Meet Chloe, my ex-
girlfriend

    The next day would serve to prove to me why I had a foreboding feeling constricting my chest the day before. And it had nothing to do with Luka.

It had to do with Zoey.

Because as I jogged down the stairs the next morning in a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, I stopped so suddenly at who I saw that I twisted my ankle and fell the rest of the way down.

I hardly noticed Luka crouching over me to assess me, or Owen lifting my arm, or Zoey asking me something. My ears were echoey and all I heard was my own shallow breathing as I took in the sight of him.

My ex boyfriend, Zane.

In the middle of my house.

He looked the same as he had when I'd left Vermont, the same light hair and dark eyes combo that haunted my dreams and would serve to haunt them for many years to come. His locks of hair were swept over his forehead as usual, like he couldn't give a crap. And truthfully, he probably couldn't.

His lips tilted into a crooked smirk at the sight of me laying at the bottom of the stairs. He remembered me, no doubt about that, and his dark almost black eyes ran from my head to my toes almost teasingly. I felt bile rise in my throat and struggled to rid myself of the awful thoughts plaguing my head.

But it was almost impossible when the source of all of them was standing right in front of me.

He knew what he did to girls, what he did to me. He took refuge in his ability to portray innocence and the boy-next-door look even though really he was a coward. Underneath it all he was the worst type of human being and he'd shown me that tenfold on more than one occasion.

Zane caught my gaze, his smirk widening as if he'd won. He knew what his presence did to me, he'd caused one too many panic attacks and witnessed just about half of them. When it was just the two of us he'd laugh, boisterously so like my anxiety and depression was the next biggest hit TV show. Like I was some kind of comedy, some kind of joke.

And to him, I was a joke. To him, my emotions and well being were completely and utterly a joke.

Luka's concerned gaze broke my sight, cutting me off from seeing Zane and I smiled slightly at the tanned hand that began stroking my cheek. His eyes ran all around my face and held curiosity and concern. His features looked confused, like he was putting together a puzzle.

"Cheese Puff, you okay?" Luka murmured softly, stroking my chin with one hand and my ankle with the other.

I sighed shakily and nodded. I couldn't let him know how I was really feeling. I couldn't give away the fact that my heartbeat had tripled it's normal speed and my stomach was clenching and unclenching so rapidly it made me nauseous. My hands were hot and my feet were cold and it felt like someone had a vice grip around my lungs as I fought to catch my ragged breathing from doing nothing at all.

I was in the midst of another panic attack.

Luka noticed by the way his eyes widened and he began stroking my hair, mumbling niceties in my ear. I focused on my breathing like I'd been taught, in and out slowly, in through the nose out through the mouth. Eventually I caught up to my senses and began to breathe again, but Zane was still here. I hadn't imagined him; he was very real and in the flesh smirking at my emotional breakdown.

I didn't realize I was crying until Luka wiped the tears away softly.

Though his eyes held unvoiced questions, he knew me better than to ask in front of people. He knew I'd shut down in front of anyone but him. If Owen, Zoey, Chris and Bradley had seen my state of despair, they hadn't showed it.

I took Luka's hand he offered to help me up, springing to my feet and looking over towards Zane. His smirk had only grown and the aura of confidence around him hadn't weakened in the slightest. I felt the same way around him now as I had months ago, like a little pebble next to a huge boulder.

"Hey Chloe," Bradley greeted amicably with a wide smile on his face. His arm was casually slung around Zoey, and she was peering over at me with concern. So she had noticed...

"Hey Brad."

"Hey Chlo Stick," Zane's deep rasp wafted towards me, showing his air of bravado. The nickname made me blanche and I worked hard to get the color back to my face. I felt the workings of another attack but forced myself to focus on Luka's hand on the small of my back.

"H-Hey Zane," I mumbled, avoiding his eyes. If I looked into those haunting dark eyes, I'd go into another panic attack immediately. I saw them enough in my nightmares, now I was forced to see them again in person? What kind of sick joke was this?

"You two know each other?" Brad asked, furrowing his brows together in confusion.

Unfortunately.

"You two know each other?" I couldn't help but ask.

"Oh, right," Brad chuckled lightly. "Everyone this is Zane, my brother."

It felt like my heart stopped in that moment. I hadn't even known Zane had a brother, and yet his brother was dating my best friend? If a sick joke hadn't been being played on me before, it sure was now.

"Lee, meet Chloe, my ex girlfriend."

The way he so calmly said those words sent anger coursing through my veins. He'd said the sentence like we were just a couple who ended, maybe on good terms or maybe on bad. Like we were a couple who could go out to a movie and argue about how it should have ended, then share a beautiful kiss while the sun set and he walked me to my door.

And damn, if that wasn't the furthest from the truth.

I focused on calming my angry breathing as the eyes of everyone in the room turned to me. It was in this moment I was glad Gia had gone on a book signing trip, because she was the person who could read me best besides Luka. Gia saw through even my toughest of facades, and she'd surely see through this one.

Much like Luka was doing as he studied my features with a clenched jaw.

I put on a poker face but it was too late. He saw straight through it and turned his narrowed eyes towards Zane. I could tell he was putting the pieces together, but not even analytical Luka could fully piece my puzzle together. It was far too jagged and edgy to ever perfectly be pieced together again, not without some extra pieces here and some cut edges there.

"You dated Zane? How was it?" Zoey asked with a curious cocked brow and I bit my lip to let my words explode from my mouth. To voice the truth, of what actually happened, because I remembered his threats so vividly to this day I could repeat them word for word.

So instead of being honest and telling them the truth about the nature of our 'relationship', I embellished a little bit. With a curt not, I responded quietly. "Something like that. Great times, right Zane?"

Though my words held a firm undertone of satire in them, no one noticed. Luke did, of course with his percipient attributes, but I digress. Still, Zane smirked viciously, and with the utmost honesty I think he could possess he replied, "Only the best."

I clenched my fists tightly at that, my fingernails that had gotten just a bit too long digging into my palm painfully. I didn't need the reminder of how much he enjoyed our time together, like it was one of the best times of his life. I'd been fortunate enough to endure only the very physical ways of him showing me just how much he had.

Luka's hand found mine, clasping them together and rubbing his thumb where my thumb had dug into my palms. I'm sure he could feel the indents in my skin, but said nothing. Still, he was tensed beside me as he stared over at the monster in front of us. I knew Zane couldn't hurt me again, physically at least. Not here anyway, with my brother and his two best friends by my side. If he got me alone, though, it would be a whole other story.

I'd have to rewrite the entire game plan in my head of my time in LA. Because throughout every possible scenario I had in my head on telling my past to the people I loved, Zane showing up hadn't been in any of them. And if I didn't voice my past, if I didn't divulge in what had been done to me, I knew he'd do much worse given the chance. It was a chance I couldn't take.

"Anyways," Owen murmured, obviously sensing some kind of tension in the air. He wasn't completely dense, I'd give him that much. "I wanted to talk to Chloe alone, if that's alright."

"No," Luka and Zane both protested simultaneously before turning to each other with death glares. I gulped at the murderous look in Zane's eyes, but one glance at Luka told me he was sporting the exact same one.

Owen's gaze wafted over towards Zane with curiosity, since he made it seem like we were amicable ex's and not bitter rivals, but then he looked back towards me. "Chloe?"

I sighed before nodding, ignoring the look Luka shot me. At this point, I would have done almost anything to avoid seeing Zane for much longer than I needed to. If Owen was my only way to avoid the semblance that was Zane, I'd take that opportunity by the reigns and ride like the fucking wind.

I followed him to the kitchen, the silence in the air palpable as our feet hit the hardwood floor in a consistent sound. I had a slight limp to my walk, my ankle just a little bit sore since my fall, but my other foot held a certain skip to my step. I was more than happy to depart from the satanic individual in the living room currently following my every move with his eyes.

When we got to the kitchen, Owen pivoted fast and eyed me. "You okay?"

I shrugged before nodding. "More or less."

He nodded too, seeming to buy it before running a hand through his hair. He looked around, then back at me, before saying, "Chlo Bo, I love you."

"I love you too, Owe Bo," I mumbled confusedly. "We've known each other a long time. We're really close-"

"No, no, I mean I was in love with you," Owen dropped the bomb on me, before averting his gaze. "Or at least I thought I was."

My brows furrowed. Not that I wasn't happy he was using past tense, because if I'm being honest I was. Though I'd spent most of my life mooning over him, I couldn't help the loss of feelings I felt when put into a romantic situation with him. I couldn't explain it, but I'd only come up with one explanation; I was never in love with Owen to begin with, I'd just relished in the fact he was the only one who treated me like a human being in front of others.

"But... You're not?" I confirmed, sitting down at the table. He took a seat next to me, pushing Gia's laptop away from the edge as he rested his elbows on the table. He laid his head in his hands as he gazed over at me a faraway look in his eyes.

"I know you like someone else."

I faltered, feeling a stutter break the surface. "I-I don't like Luka."

Owen smiled wryly over at me, still deep in thought. "I didn't mention Luka."

I felt myself flush at the realization I'd given myself away. Then as if a dam broke, he sighed sadly and spewed his thoughts. "I've thought I was in love with you forever Chloe, until I saw the way Luka talked about you to us after your date yesterday. When he told us that he waited for you, in every sense of the word, I knew that if I truly loved you like I thought I would have done the same."

I nodded, soaking in his words like a sponge. "You were the perfect girl to me Chloe and I think maybe it would have been easier to love you than face heartbreak and rejection because back then I knew you liked me. I toyed with your feelings. For that, I'm sorry."

"When I heard Luka telling his mom how he felt about you way back when, I felt like I needed to love you too. I needed to feel the same way I knew you felt about me, so that I could save myself from heartbreak. And let's be honest, you're perfect. You're beautiful, smart, funny and a hard worker, and I wanted everything you are in a future girlfriend. But I just knew last night there was no way we'd ever share the spark you and Luka do."

I felt curiosity rear it's ugly head as I asked, "What did he say?"

But Owen just chuckled, shaking his head softly. "I've been an awful best friend for years, Chloe. I'm correcting my grievances like Luka did yesterday, and that starts by being the best friend Luka deserves. I wouldn't be much of a best friend if I told you what he said in confidence, would I?"

I shrugged, but I understood. Still, I turned my nose up a little. "You'd be a good best friend to me."

He poked my nose jokingly. "Ah, but I'm not your best friend, you've got Zoey and Gia for that."

I breathed out harshly. "But you're my best friend too, just not as much. He'd never go to Gia and Zoey with something so personal."

Owen laughed loudly at that, resting a gentle hand on my shoulder. I was glad the tension between us was gone, as I had enough sitting in the living room waiting for my return that would hopefully never come. "Can you blame him?"

I returned his laugh, shaking my head as I glanced at Gia's laptop that was sat next to Zoey's purse. "No, I suppose I can't."