─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

❝ It looked as though it'd grant me any wish. Then it suddenly hit me. It's actually nice to wander aimlessly every once in a while. From time to time, it'd be wonderful to sail off without a map ❞ — Seo Dal-mi, Start-Up

🎼

C H A P T E R S E V E N

ONE CAN HAVE MANY WISHES, BUT ONLY ONE COMES TRUE.

For Kevin Moon, he wished for his best friend to like him back. For someone good to love him the day he saw the colorful flickering city lights with the boy whose ocean eyes he could drown in.

Changmin taught him to set himself free, breathe, and face challenges.

And right now—that challenge is Jacob.

"You okay?" Jacob holds the door for Kevin, studying his wandering eyes. Grip squeezing around the strap of his almost not-so-heavy backpack hanging on one side of his shoulder.

A sigh of emotional stress escapes Kevin's lips, meeting eyes with Jacob. He can't even force a smile because of how much it hurts.

Everybody knows—Kevin kissed Jacob, drunk.

The rest of the student body zooms through them, fingers tapping out messages on their cellphones. Animated conversations fill the crowded cafeteria hall. Greeting tired teenagers with sunny smiles, the lunch lady records their details before they return to their tables.

"I'm okay. Let's go. You must be hungry and busy. I don't want to keep you for too long," Kevin says, stepping outside.

In truth, he wants him to stay. Letting the door shut behind them, Jacob follows, and a questioning look settles on his face.

"That's different."

"What's different?"

"You don't say that often, but that's okay," Jacob says, voice distant and shattering glass.

No, it's not okay.

I hurt you too.

Kevin doesn't tell him that or that he still cares about him.

. . .

He's sitting on one of the bleachers next to him, looking at the football field. Thin clouds unmoving, round clouds colliding with each other, the golden sun beaming.

Jacob stays quiet, hands resting on either side of him, brown eyes lowering to see Kevin's hands nestled in his lap. He's not comfortable at all.

Otherwise, he wouldn't be reserved: left hand resting over right, long legs pressed against each other, and distanced eyes glancing up.

Jacob lets Kevin speak first, ears, mind, and heart open for him.

"I'm sorry about kissing you out of nowhere during prom night. I can't say I did it on impulse. I've been in love with you for a pretty long time, and kissing you was the only way I thought I could show you how I feel. Maybe it was the wrong time. I shouldn't have kissed you. But you kissed me and I—" a tear drops from the rim of his eyes, cheeks hot from neither embarrassment nor anger.

Then another tear falls.

"I should be sorry. I couldn't stop once I did. You kept pulling me back. I couldn't hold myself back either," Jacob says, voice cracking, "The other half was to spread rumors about us to make Hyunjae jealous. But, it created chaos. The band broke up because of me," Jacob reaches out to wipe away the tears, but Kevin does, rubbing the back of his hand at his eyes before he can.

A pause.

"I hurt you in the process. I didn't want this. I'm sorry, Kevin."

And another tear falls.

They keep falling.

Kevin closes his eyes, breaths in, then out, mind focusing on the present; wind blowing through his hair, the sunlight's heat melting him inside-out, the sound of his heart's pace sedate.

Opening his eyes, he finds Jacob looking at Hyunjae, dribbling a basketball, far across the center.

Most likely, it seems he's attempting a three-pointer, and when the ball swiftly enters the hoop, escaping through the net, the girls running on the track stop and squeal from afar.

Jacob loves Hyunjae.

Why didn't he realize sooner?

"Hey, Jacob," Kevin calls.

He can see the regret and disappointment glitter in his ginger irises, cracking a sweet smile, shifting his attention to him, "What's up?"

Jacob's friendly, a social butterfly, and Kevin's not a good enough flower.

"Let's not be friends anymore. I think us, continuing being friends would be hard, for me," Kevin confronts, voice steady. He swears his heartbeat thumping similar to the basketball pounding against the ground means one thing: he's anxious about the events proceeding after this.

"Okay, as long as you're happy," Jacob says, a little surprised.

"You too. I'll never think of you as a stranger, ever," he presses as he helps the other stand. There's guilt in the way they look at each other, apprehension weighing down on their shoulders.

Kevin spots a tiger swallowtail flutter past them, white circles dotting the black front and blue lower wing. He feels the faintest smile sketch on him as if he's the canvas.

His emotions represent vivid dreams, daylight struggles, memories of the universe he created, and every single second passing brings him closer to tomorrow.

It's summertime and butterflies season. Butterflies don't stay for too long.

This time, he wishes for a love that'd stay.

"Ever?" Jacob confirms.

"Never," Kevin grins.

And Kevin finally feels free, not locked in a cage of one-sided love.

Free from holding onto his love for him.

After all, his flight has just begun.

Let yourself free. Spread your wings, dive, and fly high, hummingbird.

. . .

"So you're telling me you saw them kiss and almost did that thing?" Chanhee gasps inaudibly, brows knitting, and hand clasped over mouth. He stops swaying forward on the forest green swing seeing Changmin's blue eyes well up with salty tears prickling down his puffy rosy cheeks.

"I think I'm cursed."

"But isn't Kevin the Harry Potter to your Hermione Grainger? It should be the other way around, right?" Chanhee inquires, "Here, have this. It will help," he says, passing him the Baskin & Robbin's ice cream cup filled with the equal goodness of Vanilla and Chocolate.

"No, Harry ended up with Ginny. Hermione ended up with Ron," Changmin answers, tone dismissive, staring into the darkness of the park, fingers wrapping around the cold container.

"You can have it. I'm not hungry," Changmin says, giving Chanhee the sweet treat. He jumps off of the swing, landing in a crouch position, head whipping over his shoulder.

Winter Coyote.

You're diligent, sharp, focused, silent, and quick. Chanhee thinks.

"Promises aren't forever. But wishes are. We can always wish and never act on them. Changmin, we're graduating high school. You might never see Kevin again. Do you want to leave your feelings unsaid?"

Does he?

No.

By any chance, however, Juyeon comes to like Kevin—he may not have a chance because he's a good guy.

And he isn't.

Juyeon is boyfriend material because he's kind, polite, understanding, and gentle. He's tall, plays basketball, and can cook.

And Changmin, what does he have?

"Not yet. I'll be by Kevin's side and protect him," it's simple, and then not with the feelings he has for him, so the only thing he can do is be there for him.

Changmin's heartbeat fastens, pounding underneath his hoodie when the cool breeze hits his face, gaze rising to the tree canopy.

Kevin's face was hilarious when he climbed the tree entering his room from the window, but when he saw him, it looked as if he was crying, and Changmin's heart right there dropped.

Telling him how he thinks his eyes hold the universe wiped away the sorrow dusting his cheeks.

Changmin wonders if Kevin needed the cold, and a sweet memory enters his mind, pondering upon his thoughts.

"Sometimes, when someone feels hot, the heat of endearment melts the person. It's strange, I know. The warmth from another heals the wounds of battles they faced. Running away doesn't mean you're afraid. You're letting yourself take a step back and gather all the emotions rushing through you," Younghoon says, throwing him a towel.

"But doesn't the cold take over hot?" Changmin assures, head inclining, brow raised.

"Take a shower, or you'll get sick, silly," he laughs. "I'll explain later," Younghoon goes back to studying, highlighting a string of words he remembers his teacher lecturing over.

Changmin's short strides carry him to the bathroom, mind registering Younghoon's words.

If he watched every romantic movie made, the definition of love isn't enough because it's more of a feeling, a power that protects all.

Turning back, he's face to face with him.

"You can change into these, though it's a bit oversized. It will be okay," Younghoon hands him his pajamas, and Changmin takes them hesitantly.

"When do you want me to return them?"

"Don't worry about it," Youghoon reassures, reaching out to mess his wet hair. "Rest well, okay?"

"You got to tell him how you feel. He won't know," Chanhee gushes and jumps at Changmin creeping up behind them.

"Show not tell," Changmin teases.

"Point taken and don't do that! You got to stop creeping up on people. It's scary," he yanks him by the arm, so he's in front of him. "I don't want to see you sad. I don't want you fighting this alone. Younghoon would say the same. He'd save you no matter how many times you'd fall," Chanhee wraps his arms around Changmin's neck, staring into his blue eyes.

Chanhee's right.

Younghoon was Changmin's knight in shining armor.

And now Changmin will be Kevin's knight.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A U T H O R 'S  N O T E

I'm so sorry for taking forever in updating this chapter, but I really wanted to take as much time and highlight Changmin's memories of the past as well. I apologize for any mistakes as I haven't proofread, so I'll be editing this chapter later!

As always, thank you for reading

Take care of yourself, okay? You're doing so well, I'm proud of you 💖