He closed his eyes calming himself down ..

One thing related to his past .. that disturbs him like nothing else ...

He don't know why ...but seeing her holding the frame ... The way she was caressing his pic ...her hands trembling ...

His heart pained in a different manner ... Where as his mind was alot different

He was already disturbed from last night ....when he burst out ....broke down ...

He blamed himself for everything ....why is everything all complicated ?.

Maybe because he thought for her .... He thought of her .... He felt painful ...the thought of breaking her heart pained him ...

Why ? ... He don't know ... But today what he was fearing last night he did it today itself ...

His heart mocked him ...

He don't know why .... But he don't want that the mere shadow of his past hurts her ... He felt raged ... As she touched what I'd really damn precious to him ...

And when it broke down ...he lost his control ... And broke her poor heart ...

He took the support of table to steady himself ...

What he did ....closed his eyes ... What he need right now is to apologise her ... But how will he justify her? ...

Where was her mistake in all the mess he had gone through ? ...

His heart pained ....as her misty painful gaze flashed in his eyes ...

He is at mistake ... He knows ... But what he don't know is how he will make her understand....from what mental health he is going through ...

But maybe he don't know ... Her condition is worse than him ...

He is only suffering with a bad mental health ... But she ... Dhe is suffering with critical physical health and very worse mental health ...

All she had done is she just adored himm In the pic ... And silently yet painfully wished to see him this happy once more before dying ...

She wished ... And he ... What he have done ... He landed her in a painful condition firstly gave her hopes .. then shattered them loud ...

Kyu ? ... Kyu nahi sambhal pata hu main khud ko ? ...

Kal raat ... Maine khud dosti ka haath badhaya uski taraf ... Khud usko umeed di ... Or ajj uski saari ummedein tod di ...

Ye kya kar Raha hu main ? ... Ek taraf dil kehta hai ke Sana ka hath tham lu ...usse accept Karu ... Uske saath aage badhu ...

Or dusri taraf ... Main Neha ko bhula nhi paa Raha ... Kya itna asan hota hai bhulana ? ... Ke kisi or insaan ke aane se ap apni pehle mohobbat bhool jao ? .. 

Main aise kaise kar sakta hu ? ... Main usse dhokha nhi de sakta ... Main uske saath wo nhi kar sakta Jo usne mere saath kiya ...

Par kya zindagi bhar aise hi rehna padega ? ..  mere saath saath Sana ki zindagi bhi kharab ho rhi hai .. 

Or main ... Why am I being so fucking selfish ? ...

His eyes welled up ...as he bit his lips to control himself ...

The sight of her leaving him shattered again flashed in front of his eyes ..

KYU pyaar main shartein zaruri hai ? ... Kyu mujhe usse bhulane ke liye koi chaiye ? ... Main nhi chahta usse bhulana ... Yaadon ke sahare bhi zindagi nikali jaa sakti hai ...

Par sana ... Uski kya galti ? ... Wo kyu bhugte mere sath ? ..  mujhe toh samajh hi nhi aata wo abhi tak hai bhi kyu mere sath ? ... Jab usse pata hai ... Ke main usse dard ke alawa or kuch nhi de sakta ...

Kuch nhi ... He whispered

He has downed himself alot ... He was never this broken ... He was a happy soul who used to stay away from all this but deep down believed and promised himself to be loyal to the person he will love ...

Maybe he is continuing the promise he has done with himself not with her ? ...

But maybe some promises are made to be broken ...

..........

Sana ... He gets in the room ... The sight broke his heart brutally ...

She was laying lifelessly ... Her eyes closed she was unconscious...

He immediately made his way to her keeping her head in his lap she tapped her cheeks hurriedly ...

Sana ... Sana ... He yelled at the same time the main door knocked in a high pitch he was already very anxious

He made her head lay on the bed as he runs to open the door ...

He found Rohit stood there continuously tapping his feets ...

Sidharth .. Sana .. kaha hai wo thik hai na ? ...

Pata nhi main studio main tha .  She is unconscious....he said hurriedly turning back his feets ...

Rohit tumhe pata hai Sana ko kya hua hai ? ... Sidharth panicked ... Looking at her tapping her cheeks continuously calling her ...

The fear of loosing her is visible is his eyes and can be easily seen by Rohit. ..

Sidharth hamr sana ko hospital lejana hai ...

He nodded picking her frame up in his arms ... as both of them rushed down the stairs his whole body was trembling showing how much scared he is ... Looking at her condition... Cursed himself ....as he took the blame that his mistake landed her in this condition

He sat on the backseat ... With her in his arms ...

His emotions felt bursting out any moment holding her in his arms ...

He continuesly tapped her cheek in order to wake her up ...

His heart bleed as she didn't responded

He held her more tighter to his heart ... The fear of loosing her was evident ...

He don't know why ... And right now hid priority is sana only ... Not any kind of thoughts ...

The whole car ride was do difficult for him ... But the most difficult time is yet to come ...

...........

Sidharth kuch hua tha kya ? ... I mean ....she was sounding so stressed ... Kuch hua hai ? .. dekho uski medical condition... It's not good toh mera janna zaruri hai ... Ki usse ek dum se panic attack kyu aaya ? ...

Rohit said in a rushed and questioning voice ...

Sidharth's mind was stuck on his words ...

Her medical condition ? ... In which condition she is ? .. 

He was in his own thoughts when Rohit jerked him out of it ...

Sidharth ? ... He held his arm ..

Hm ... Chota sa jhagda hua tha ... Sidharth said ... Keeping his things personal as still he didn't know Rohit

Hm ... He humms stressfully ... Looking at her unconscious self dhe was laying as if dead ...

The mere thought shivered his soul .... as he felt his tears were on the verge of spilling out ...

He sat down back ... He needs his bestfriend to be safe ...

He can't loose her ... Dhr have to watch so much ... She needs to pick up his life play with his kids ...

She needs so much of love in return ... How can she go ? ... How can she left him so early ...

Rohit sat down back ... Though how much tough he tries to be but still her condition haunts him

He kept his palm over his eyes head hung low... As he sobbed ...

He is really sensitive as already he don't have many people in his life ...

Sidharth's heart sank more in dear ... As he looked at him crying ... This condition of her isn't normal ... He guessed ...

He sat near Rohit keeping his hand over his shoulder ...

Wo thik toh hai na ? ... He asked his voice trembling ...

Rohit hugged him all of a sudden ... Making sidharth feel more scared seeing his condition and her condition

He don't know but he don't wanted the thing which is in his mind to come true ...

Is her medical condition that bad ? ... He felt more of guilty ... As in the morning he yelled on her ...though how much he dienies but still he knows how painful it is when your partner straight away say that don't expect anything from them ...

That hurts like hell ... And the most painful part is when you have loved the person with all you could have ...

And still the person says ... Don't expect anything in return ...

He felt painful ....

Wo nai hai thik ... Sidharth ... Rohit brokedown ... He needed to let out ... it's painful seeing her suffer like that ...

Wo thik nai hai ...wo nhi chahti wo... He couldn't utter anything ... Just hugged him as he felt a brotherly warmth and figure when sidharth is around him ..

Though how much intimidating sidharth looks ... Still in his presence Rohit felt a brotherly
warmth ...

Before sidharth could ask more his family came ... He had already
Make everyone aware that she fainted ...

Rita maa and Ashok uncle took flight ... And Abhishek too came back ... As soon as he got to know about Sana ...

Aunty ... Rohit looked at her ... He got up and hugged her ...

Bache ... Kya hua ? ...Sana thik hai na ? ... Rita maa whispered in. Her panicked voice .... She loved the girl more then her daughter ...

Ye sab kaise hua Bhai ? ... Abhishek asked sidharth ... Sidharth looked down ...

Main studio main tha ... I didn't know ... Hus eyes were misty ...

He blamed himself for yelling on her ... Giving her pain breaking her ...

Why he always hurts everyone around him ? ... Why ? ..

Why every person who is near or close to him .. he always end up hurting them ? ....why ? ...

Always ... Not for once ...

The moments of last night flashed in his mind ....

The way her eyes were twinkling she was so happy with him ... When he showed his concern ... She felt so good ... Her face and her eyes reflected what she felt ...

They way she was adoring him ... While he fed her ... It was heartwarming for him ...

Abhishek kept his hand over his shoulder understanding from what he is going through ...

Sidharth controlled him self ...

The doctor came out after checking her as slowly her body responded to the treatment ...

Wo thik toh hai na doctor ? ....sidharth asked hurriedly ...

Right now ... She is fine ... But we can't say about the future ... As we are treating her with medicines ... Kyuki surgery main survive karne ke chances bohot Kam hai ...

But you need to take care of her ... Specially about her medications ...

Last week unki dawaiya change Hui thi .. ajj she took extra dosage of the medicines ... Which is quite harmful ... Wo is condition main nhi hai ke koi bhi risk le sake unki health ke sath ...

Even surgery is impossible right now kyuki she is not in a condition

Extra dosage ki waja se she was un conscious khatre ki koi baat nhi hai ...

Pls be careful with her ... Kyuki unki condition bohot sensitive haj already she is in the last stage ...

Unka heart is condition main nhi hai ke kuch shocks le sake ... Pls be gentle with her ... And try to keep her happy ..  the will of living can do alot ...

Doctor said ..  going away ... Where as ground slipped beneath his feets ...

Surgery ? ... Surgery Kyu ? .. Aisa kya hua hai bhabhi ko ? ...Abhishek panicked ...

Rohit found himself in a tough spg as right now ... He too is not in the condition he is really disturbed by her sudden condition

Her heart has a hole ....he whispered... Everyone looked at him shockingly

Sidharth felt as if someone stopped him to breathe ...

What ? ... Abhishek whispered

Itni badi baat kyu chupayi bache ? .... Bol? ...

Aunty ... Wo nhi chahti thi ... Maine bohot kaha usko ... Ke wo aap sabko bata de ... Ki uski condition kaisi hai ... Par usko tha ke wo apne Marne ki haalat main ab kisi ko pareshan nhi karna chahti ...

He held her hands ...

Jee hi nhi aunty wo toh ? ... Hamesha sabke baare main socha ... Jee hi nhi .... Maine bohot koshish ki ... Usne andar jeene ki icha ko jagane ke liye ... Par wo har baar yahi kehti hai ...

Kr jab waqt aata hai ... Toh insaan tok nhi pata ... Mujhe pata hai ... Meri zindagi itni badi nhi hai ... Isiliye jab tak hai ... Sabke saath normal hokar jeena chahti hu ... He whispered his eyes welled up ...

Main ...batana chahta tha aap sabko ... Maine bohot request ki usse ki atleast mujhe batane de ..par usne apni Kasam dekar mujhe rok liya aunty ...

Sidharth listened all this ... His mind couldn't process all this ...

Kitne chances hai ? ....rita maa whispered her voice breaking ....Abhishek covered his face with his palms ...

The girl he is living with from the last month ... She is so happy so bubbly ... She didn't for once let them know from what she is suffering within herself ...

He felt so devastated and painful ... Whereas sidharth ...

He was lost at words hurted ... His heart was breaking into peices ... He don't know why ? ...

But theere thought of loosing her trembled his soul ... He felt sharp pain in his heart just by the thought ..

But he didn't knew that her life is that damn unpredictable

What if today he lost her ? ...

What if today ... She left him ? .... He would die with the guilt ....which is becoming heavier ....after Neha ... Today ... His heart felt to cry out ....but tears were not ready to come as the emotions

As if they were dried within himself a long back ...

Sach kahu toh 10% bhi nhi .... Rohit whispered ... Tear fell down his eyes ...

Aunty ... Aapse ek request Karu pls ? ... Pls aap usko samjhao na ... Wo jeena nhi chahti aunty ... Wo uske andar wo icha hi nhi hai jeene ki ... Wo nhi samajhti aunty ...wo nhi samajhti ....Rohit whispered

His little sister ...whome he cared just like mother ... For whome he protected just like a father ... He was always there for her in her mischievousnesd yet saved her from everything just like a bug protective brother ...

His small baby girl is suffering like this ... It's more than damn painful for him .... .

Shant hoja bacha ... Rita maa held herself ... She needs to be strong for her children's ...she have considered him as her children only ...

Sidharth turned around ... Looked at her through the glass ...

He felt the distance between there bodies is just some mere steps ... But they were so away from each other ... Mentally ... emotionally ...

His heart felt breaking more ... As he looked at her ....the sight of her laying lifelessly .. in his room flashed making him so vulnerable

.there isn't any emotional connection between them ... To make him feel like this ... But ... The connection which he made ... Looking in her eyes depicting her soul ...

The connection which he made when she smiled in his presence... He felt deeply connected with her every move ...

Pata hai kyu ? ... Kyuki Sana ke har move main sidharth ki jhalak thi .   Uski aankhon ki chamak main sidharth ki hasi thi ... Uske hasne ke muskurane ke wajah sidharth ki nami thi ...

Kya naam doon main hamare rishte ko ? ... He whispered keeping his palm over the glass ... Caressed her face ...

Ek taraf main nahi chahta tum mere karib aao ... Ek taraf ... Tumhara door Jana mere dil ko itna dard deta hai ...

Paas aaye dooriyan phir bhi kam na hui
Ek adhuri si hamari kahani rahi

Ek taraf lagta hai jaise ye sirf attraction hai ... Kyuki main kabhi tumse pyaar nhi kar sakta ...

Nahi kar sakta na main tumhe pyaar ? ...

Aasman ko zameen ye zaruri nhi
Jaa mile ... Jaa mile .

Ishq Sacha wahi jisko milti nhi
Manziley... Manziley 💔

Tumhe paane se bhi darta hu or tumhe khone se bhi ... Aisa kyu hai naaz ? ....he whispered

Na tumhe paana chahta hu na tumhe khona chahta hu ? ... Kyu tumhe is halat main dekh kar Mera dil toot raha hai ? ...

Main nhi jaanta ... Main sachi nhi jaanta ... Par tumhe is haalat main pohochna nahi chahta tha main ...

Sachi ...he whispered... His voice was too slow for anyone to hear ...

Tumhari haalat ka zimmedar main hu ? ...na main itna react karta na tumhe hurt karta ... Na tum pareshan hoti ...

Dekho kaha le aaya main tumhe....abhi toh hum karib aaye bhi nhi ...or pehle hi tumhe itni badi saza mil gyi naaz ...

Am I that unlucky? ... His heart whispered breaking in peices. ..

He blamed himself ... Because somewhere he knows that what happened today is just because of him ..

....................

Will Sana be able to forgive him? ...

When she got rejected for more than 2 times ....will she again be able to forgive him ? .. 

Hope you all liked it ❤️

Ajj kitne waqt bad Aisa laga jaise dil khol kar likha maine ... Kisi ke liye nhi kar apne liye .... Bohot acha laga meko ... Sachi ... I hope aap sabko bhi feeling aayi ho ❤️

Saare comments kar dena pyare pyaare ❤️😭