Just when she turned her head on the other side to look for him ... He was nowhere to be seen ...

She couldn't find him ... Looking here and there hurriedly trying to look for him ...

Her heart was feeling that something is not right .... he is not right .... She couldn't wait more ...

But suddenly her eyes fell on neha who stood like a rock ... Watching the gate ...

Somewhere Sana got the idea that sidharth walked away ....she hurriedly excused herself ....

Walking over the gate her priority is sidharth ... Not that girl .... Who gave the life trauma to him ...

Pata nhi kaha honge ....she held her head in her hand ... She is sweating badly in the stress ... Her heartbeats were higher ...

Damn she shouldn't left him alone ...

Babaji pls unko thik rakhna pls pls ....she wished for him being fine ...

She rushed towards her room ... Opening the door the she was confused whether sidharth is in the room or not as the room was all dark ...

The darkness which was scaring ... But that gave peace to someone .... Who sat in the darkness letting his pls trauma ...

The trauma which he engulfed in his heart drowned but still smiled ...

The trauma which made him suffer alone everyday every hour ....every second ... 💔

It isn't always if he doesn't showing that doesn't mean he isn't suffering ...

She was entered in slowly heart beating pace .... She couldn't just stop shivering ....the vibes were immensely plainly ... Made her heart scrunch ...

She loves him that is why she can just sense just by seeing him what he is going through ....

She closed the door behind her not wanting anyone to invade ...

As the moonlight peeped in ...he was sitting on the floor showing his back to her ...

He was scrunched up in a ball ... Holding his knees closer by his arms his head leaning over his as he just looked straight ...

Reminsing what he has gone through just because of that person ...

She sat down near him just couldn't stop shivering ... 

She kept her hand over his shoulder ... He was immediately aware of someone's presence ...

He pushed himself back to the wall ... Shivering ....

Pls ....pls .... Pls leave me ... Pls ... He stammered .... His voice was low her heart scrunched up ... Her hand just in the air ...

Mat ao ... Paas mat ao ...nahi... Sab chorh ke jate hai na ....sab sab ...  tum bhi jao..  tum Neha ... Wahi ho na ... Chorh kar gyi thi ....

Haina chorh kar gyi thi ....chlo ab tum jao ... Dekho ... Main ab selfish nhi ... Chlo ... I am ....i ... Letting ... You go ... He said ....chuckling ... Tear rolled down. ...

Jao jao .... Door jao saare ....sab ... he said holding his hand up ...

He kept on to whisper the same thing ... Until heard her shivering voice ...

Sid...har...th ... She tried to calm herself dprj but it isn't easy ...

He closed his eyes ... As if his heart could sense her ... His peace ...

She slowly ....can't closer to him .. touched his hand but he didn't jerked her this time ... He was just feeling someone's presence ...

Someone whome he know from the deepest of his heart ...

Sidharth.... She called him again ....slowly getting closer .... She opened his arms .... And slowly massaged his head with her small palms ... It might gave him a little relief ....she knows how head burst ....she had suffered from panic attack before ...

She slowly massaged his head where as he left his whole body .... Taking some deep breaths to control himself ...

He is not alone ... to break down.....

He doesn't want her to see his broken side but on the other hand ....he doesn't want her to ho away from.him ...

She kept caressing his head where as he slowly opened his eyes ... Just to find her looking at him ...

And just by looking at her he just broke down ....

Sana stood on her knees ... He hugged her stomach .... Hiding his face ... He sobbed hard ...

Thys is painful ... This is .... And he is going through ... From a long time and today when he saw Neha his emotions triggered .

Sab thik hai bebu ....she whispered...

Kuch nhi hua ... Sab thik hai ... Shh ....she caressed his hairs whispering soothing words to calm him down ... She don't know how to console a person ...

Because she never had someone in her life who could console her when she was suffering from her panick attacks ...

Thik hu ....he whispered....controlling over his emotions he needs to ....

He pulled back from ... She came to his lever and held his face in her palms ... Making him.look in her eyes ...

His eyes red in tears ... Hers were only filled deep love and emotions for him ...

She slowly took a step closer ... And took his lips in her's ....giving him the feeling that she is near him ...

He closed his eyes just feeling her ... Her love as she slowly kissed him ..  with all her love ... Caressed his face ....to calm him down ...

She kissed him slowly ... But something happened in his heart when she kissed him...

He wasn't feeling good to move back from the kiss the feeling was soothing ....

Main yahi hu aapke pass ... Aap bol sakte ho ... Jo bhi hai aapke Dil main ...

She whispered....her lips parted from him but still inches away his breathings were not normal ...

As he first time experienced this type of feeling when someone actually showed some efforts to calm him...

To make him feel loved ... Wirh words or actions no matter ... But she is the first one ...

He smiled a little ....holding her hand ....calmed a little down ... The feeling that someone will listen to him .

She sat down ....in his arms ....and kept her head over his heart ....giving him.... The comfort ...and time to speak ...

He kept quiet for sometime ...where as she kept in his kissing on his heart ... Caressing his hairs ..

After sometime he spoke ...

AISA KYU HOTA HAI ? ....JAB HUM ... KISI KO MAANGTE HAI ... APNI HAR ARDAAS MAIN ... USKA ZIKR KARTE HAI ...

or jab wo shaqs milta nhi toh bikhar jaate hai ...

Jaanta hu ... Shayad Mera pyaar enough nhi tha uske liye tabhi shayad usse Paisa dikha ...

Mera use Kiya ... Or mujhse kaha ke ab main uske kaam ka nhi Raha ....he chuckled..

Aisa kyu karte hai ? ... Pyaar matlab se toh nhi hota na ? ... Pyaar main swarth toh nhi hota ...

Pyaar main samarpan hota hai ... Usne swarth rakha ... Meri taraf ...

Maine usse pyaar kiya ... Or usne dikhawa ? ...

Or jab istamal khatam.hogys toh chali gyi chorh kar ...

Wo kehte hai na ...

Bichad gya har saathi dekar palmdo pal ka saath

Kisko ko fursat hai jo Thame deewano ka haath 💔

Or ajj ab jab zarurat padi toh wapis aana chahti hai....

He chuckles ...

Or main bhi bewakoof ... usse dekh kar dobara se apni yr halat bana li ?

Aisa kyu hu main ? ... Kitni mushkil se sab thik hua tha ...

Sana ... Mujhe kyu sab apni zarurat ke liye use karte hai ? ... Or jab unki zarurat khatam ho jati hai toh faik dete hai kahi ...

He chuckles ...bitterly ...

Main kyu ? ... His voice was blank eyes teared up yet his lips curled up in a painful smile ...

Wo kehti hai ... Ke wo mujhse pyaar karti hai ... He chuckles ...

Pyaar aisa hota hai ? ... Agar Aisa hi hota hai TOH QB KABHI PYAAR CHAHIYE HI NHI ZINDAGI MAIN ...

nhi chaiye ... Ye pyaar ...  he was in his own trauma couldn't just realise that he broke someone's hopes and that person ... Still stood ...

For him .... She calmed down her paining heart ... His words were peircing her heart so painfully ...

Yet she just couldn't leave his side ...

Because she loved him ... With all she could have ...

Sidharth ... Shh ....shant ....she whispered her soft angelic voice when got over his head he felt anxious

Immediately stopped ....what he was saying just looked straight ...

The fear that showing his pain would make everyone leave him over powered suddenly ...

Where as she only just tried to calm him down but he took it pk the other way in the fraction of second ...

Pyar aisa hi hota hai shayad sidharth ....she whispered...

Sitting next to him....

Agar usme dard na ho ... Intzaar na ho ...chahat na ho ... Toh maza kaisa ? ... Jisko dil ki gehrayi se chaha ho unse kabhi pyaar karna choda jaa sakta hi nhi ...

Kyuki shayad unki Kami ko mehsoos karna hamari aadat hoti hai m..

Hum har roz unke intzaar main marte hai ... Har roz saans lete hai sirf yahi soch kar ...

SHAYAD UNSE KAL MULAKAT HO🥀

Par dheere dheere aadat si ho jati hai aise ghut kar jeene ki ...

Or jab unki jhalak dobara dikhti hai toh hum sehen jaate hai ...

Hota hai ... It is ok ... Breakdowns bhi zaruri hai ... Har waqt ghut kar rehna andar hi andar sawalon se ladna aasan toh nhi ?
..

Or jab jinse toot kar ishq kiya ho toh unhe dobara dekh kar himmat toot hi jati hai ....she smiled ...

Apne aap ko sambhalo ...sidharth par khud ko roko mat ....

Khol do dil ko ... Bahar aane do dard ko ...

Jab tak hum dard ko nhi chodenge ...

DARD HUME JAISE CHOREGA ?

Aane do baar usko Jo ap kehna chahte ho par khud ko rok rahe ho ...

Main yahi hu sidharth aapke pass hi hu ...aap keh sakte ho ...apna dil.khol sakte ho ...

She held his hand ... And kissed his knuckles .... Where as he was just looking at her ...

No one was there before to make him feel ... That he could speak ...

He didn't said anything it needs courage to speak out specially to those who tormented themselves alot ... Fron letting the emotions pout out ...

He just laid his head on her lap ... Turned and dogged his face in her stomach just to feel her warmth ...

His tears couldn't stop ... He had a chance but he just can't speak ...

She didn't pushed him to say anything just caressed his hairs and sat all night there ... As he slept ...

.....................

Sorry late hogyi ... Kasam se ... Man bohot tha par mental condition ki aisi taisi ho rakhi h ❤️‍🩹 toh i just can't do that ...

I am messed up rn ... Bas or kya bolu ...

Acha ... Do you have any questions for me ? ... Aivayi kuch bhi poocho ... Kuch bhiiii ❤️

Love youu ... And take care all 🫶🏻❤️🤧