Wasn't the last update good ? ... Comments and votes are low ... Idk ... I hope you all are liking this ... I am gonna end it soon ❤️

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She woke up squinting her eyes adjusting with the sunlight as soon as she opened her eyes only to find herself laying over him ...

He was under her ... She lifted her head a little up ... Founding her being so close to him ...

She don't know why when she gazed his lips ... Gulping as the strong desire to kisss him rise up in her heart ...

The thought was enough as the blood rushed to her cheeks she was a blushing mess ... cursed herself for having these types of thoughts ...

She closed her eyes remembering the last night being in his arms she found her solace when he embraced her accepted her ...

The way he removed her insecurities the way so clamly he tackled her ...

Once again her heart fell in love with the man whome she adores and worships with her everything ...

She has already gave him every rights over her ... It's his right to love her to hate her ... To connect with her or throw her away ...to push her or to comf closer ... To heal her or to break her ... It's only him ...

Only he keeps the power the break her and heal her in a damn beautiful way ...

He is the one who has the audacity to make her calm just by his eyes ... His eyes ... Which last night showed something her heart was craving for since years ...

Years ... Of longingness....of constant torture ... Years of trauma and overthinking ....years of drastic mental health and suicidal thoughts ...

Now ... Even if it's the last days of her life ...she wants to live ... With her man ....whome dhr loved atht enough that him loving her back doesn't matter to her ..

Her live only is enough for her to live ....she don't needs the reason to love him ...

She was adoring him ... His face features the way his hairs were coming over his eyes ... His lips open breathing softly ....his lips curled up in a little smile ... Eyes squinting as she was snapped back to the reality ...

Not wanting him to see her blushing she moved a little

His hold over her waist tightened... Eyes squint she cursed herself ... Taps his head a little with her small hands ... As he fell in sleep again ...

She tried to remove his hold ... But he tightened it ... Making her feel exhaust ...

She was not left with an option but to wake him up ...

Sidharth ...she meowed ...

He moved a little .... Taking her more in his arms ... As she blushed more ...

Mentally face palming herself to wake up before him ..

How will he react when he will wake up ....will he regret the last night eaht he said ? ...

Her eyes welled up ....but somewhere her heart believed that he won't do that ...

Sidharthh ....she again called him in her soft whispering mvoice as his lips curled up in a beautiful smile making her heart thumped down her chest ...

She could literally listen her heart beats the proximity was doing something to her ...

His hands all over her ... His warmth ... his heart beats ... His breaths fanning over face making her go insane ...

She was a blushing mess ... All red ... And here he was sleeping peacefully with the peace written all over his face ...

He was sleeping and if slept after years ...

She noticed his position ...as he switched he was half over her .... His face so close to her ... Her breaths were faster

Sidharthh ... She couldn't control her desires more ... So called him a little loudly making him squint his eyes open ...

The smile never left his face but grew wider as he absent mindedly snuggled in her face ...  Cozily ... Making her close her eyes with a smile adoring ...

Good morning biwi .... He whispered kissing her cheeks ....

She snapped opened her eyes listening him ... Her eyes welled up ...

Meri zindagi main tumhari koi jagah nhi hai

Tear rolled down painfully as she remembered his words.... How much she denies but atht was painful ....

Damn painful for her to bear the reality ...

He wiped her tears hurriedly

Kya hua ? ... Maine kuch kiya ?

She nodded her head ...

Sorryy ... He whispered wiping her tears without even knowing where he is at fault still apologized ...

Aap hi ne kiya ... Kabhi kehte ho ki apki zindagi main meri jagah nhi ... Kabhi kehte ho main apki biwi hu ? ...

Aise kyu kar rahe ho ? ... Paas bhi nhi aane dete or khud se door bhi nhi karte ... She sobbed ...

Bolo ... Kitna hurt karte ... Apne aap se door karte ho ? ... Us din bhi kitna sunaya mujhe apne ? ... Meri galti nhi thi ...

Main toh bas ....she sobbed painfully tired of keeping all that things in her heart it pains her alot keeping that things inside her heart it pains her to the hell

Shh shh ....he held her caressing her hairs he felt guilty ... As well as he noticed how sensitive she is that even one word can trigger her emotions ...

Or happens when ... The comfort ... You have with the person that each word spoken by them can trigger your emotions like that ...

It is the fact ... Which is happening with her ...

Naaz ... Maine us waqt Jo bhi kaha ... Tumhari kasam dil se kuch bhi nhi kaha maine ...sachi ... His voice was so soft while making her understand he never meant what he said ...

And her heart melted as she sobbed more twirling around in his arms ....seeking his warmth and comfort ...

Mujhe iata hai tumne Jaan kar kuch nhi kiya it's just mere anger issues hai ... Or past se related that things hurt alot ...

He whispered as she looked at him with her soft dor eyes ..
Making him tske a breath

Her eyes will be the death of him one day

Par mera na sachi intention nai tha apko hurt karne ... She pouted teary eyed just like a baby ... Asking for apology without even sayin it ...

Toh meri jaan hurt toh Kiya hi nai na tune ...

Maine Kiya hurt meri galti hai mujhe pata hai ... Dhyaan rakhna chaiye tha ...

Maine naaz sachi wo sab man se nhi kaha ... Main koshish kar Raha hu ...

Us raat bhi ... Bs tumse kuch chupana nhi chahta tha main ... Mera past tumhare saamne hai ... Jisse shayad abhi bhi main bahar aa hi nhi paaya hu ... Par ... He got up ... Sat down on the bed

Took a deep breath to calm himself down ... where as she sat down in front of him ... Kept her hand over his encouraging him to let wait he feel out ....in words ...

It needs alot of courage to express what you want to say ... he smiled a little ... 

Main koshish karna chahta hu ...

Tumhare saath

Tumhare saath koshish karna chahta hu... Tumhare liye ... Apne liye ...

He lifted his hand ... To cup her face ...  Her eyes welled up with his gesture ...

Tum meri partner ho ... Meri biwi ho ... Or specially meri dost ho ...

Maine apne dil se tumhe accept Kiya hai naaz ... Haan thodi der se ... Par apne man se ...

Issiliye apne man se ye toh nikal do ... Ki tum mujhe par ya kisi par bhi bojh ho ...

Jo care karte hai ... Man se karte hai ... Agar unhe ye kaha jaye ... Toh unko hurt hota hai ... Or sidharth ko pata hai ki uski naaz kabhi kisi ko hurt nhi kar sakti ...

Nhi kar sakti na ? ...

Aap ko toh bilkul bhi nhi ....she held his hand with her's looking down ....

Crying silently ...

This is just like a dream to her ... Her deep buried wish ... But the biggest fear residing in her heart is coming true ...

She could sense that he is slowly getting attached with her ...

But ...

Does she have that much life ? ...

Her life is unpredictable....she don't even know that she will wake up the next day ...

Sidharth ... Mujhe ... Mujhe nhi pata meri kitni zindagi baaki hai ... Par meri waja se aap ko pareshan hote hue kaise dekh sakti hu ? ...

Main ... I am not a good person ... Main ...worst hu main ... I don't deserve anyone ...

Aapko toh bilkul nhi ... Main ... Chahu bhi ke aapke saath ek nayi zindagi ki shuruaat karu ... Par kaise ? ... Jab meri zindagi toh khatam hone ko hai ... 💔

Dil mera hai nasamajh kitna ?
Besabar ye bewakoof bada

Chahta hai kitna tujhe
Khud magar nhi jaan saka

Kehte hai ... Jab dil khush ho toh sabse jyada maangu Hui dua bhi qubool hoti hai ... Maine toh apni har ardaas main apni maut hi Maang li ...

Agar wo puri ...

Baaki nhi hai ab kuch mere andar ... Jo dard tha bhi ... Usse bhi bayan karke khatam kar diya maine khud ko 💔

Shh ... He kept his palm over her mouth stopping herself to say anything more ...

Tumhe kuch nhi hoga ... Naaz ... Bharosa rakho ...

Jhooti ummeed kyu rakhu sidharth ? ... Mujhe pata hai .... Jab mere andar zindagi bachi hi nhi hai .... Toh phir kaise rakhu ye ummeed ke main thik ho jaungi ...

Iska jawab ... Tumhe jald hi milega ...

He got up from the place ....where as she sat there regretting upsetting him.

He walked away and stopped on the door ...

Suno ... Taiyar ho jao ... Kahi Jana hai humne .... He whispered... Taking his phone with him ...

She looked at him walkinh away ... Her eyes got misty ...

SHE CAN TURN THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MOMENT INTO THE MOST SADDEST ONE 💔

her heart whispered broken in peices ...

It hurts ....the smallest things effect ... And in which condition she is. ...she will end up ... Taking everything on herself because how broken she is ...

THERE ARE NO WORDS MADE YO DESCRIBE THE STATE OF A  BROKEN PERSON 💔

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"Cheshire"

She read ... As the car stopped infront of the centre ... The area and the locality already gave her the positivity and good vibes ....

The whole car ride was in silence as neither he said anything more she was up to decide from where to start the conversation

And how to manofy him .... But on the other hand she was feeling damn guilty ..

He came out of the car ... And opened her door just like a pure gentle men ...

She came out holding his hand ...

He took a second to calm himself ... As she was looking breathtakingly beautiful in the yellow colour suit ...

Wearing simple oxidised jewellery ...

And that sindoor in the partition of her hairs ... Gave butterflies to him ...

He took her inside ...

She don't know where they are ...but as soon as she is with him.....she don't care ...

Her breath hitched ... Seeing the people infront of her ...

She walked some steps closer ... Looking at the disabled people .

Some were old some were young ....with various kind of dissabilites struggling with life ..

Some have lost there leg some there eyes ... There vision ....

But still they were laughing around enjoying in each other's company ... Spending time ...

A smile spread over her lips as she saw the people ... Having various kinds of difficulties ... Still enjoying their life ...not loosing hopes ....

Kitni problems hai in sab ki life Mai ? ... Kitna kuch suffer Kiya puri life ... Abhi bhi kar rahe hai ... Lad rahe hai ....apne taklifo se ...

Zindagi jeene ke liye ...

Ye zindagi bohot keemti hai naaz ....sach maano ....ek hi zindagi hai.... Dukh diye zindagi ne toh aane wali khushio ko chorh kar jaana chahti ho ... Is dar se ke or dard bardasht nhi kar paogi ....

Wo dekho ... Un sab ko .... Khush hai ....apne man se ... Kisi ko dikhane ke liye nhi ... Kisi ke liye nhi ... Par apne liye ...

Taklife toh inhe bhi bohot hui hongi .... society ke taane or specially inki vulnerability... Ke ye apne kaam khud nhi kar paate ... Kahi na kahi kami reh jati hai ...

Par naaz ....inhone apni vulnerability ko apni taakat banaya ...

Phir tum kyu apne dard ko apnaye bethi ho meri jaan ? ... Bol ...

Tum chaho ... Toh tum thik ho sakti ho ... Par tum toh jeena hi nhi chahti ...

He smiled painfully the pain in his eyes broke her heart how deeply she hurted him with her words ....

Aisa nhi hai ....she meowed ... Sobbed

He took her on the corner ...

Toh bata na meri jaan phir kaisa hai ? ...

Tu samajhti hi nhi ... Dekh na in sab ko ... Kitni taklif main hai ... Par kya jeena chorh diya inhone ?.....zindagi ne toh inhe bhi kayi mome diye honge na ... Kitne dukh diye honge ...

Par kya ye log haar gye ? ... Jee rahe hai na ....toh tu kyu marna chahti hai ?.... Jab ki chances hai ...  Tum Bach sakti ho ...

Chali unhe chodo par jeena chahti ho ?....

Is khamoshi ka main kya matlab samjhu ? ... He spoke calmly looking at her ...

Main jeena chahti hu ... Mai ... Marna nhi chahti Mai ... Jeena chahti hu ....dekhna chahti hu ... Aap sabko ...

Ap ke saath rehna chahti hu main ....she sobbed letting out the pain... It is needed for her to express the years of pain ... And her deep buried wish ...

Even she wants to live ....with him ....see her future with him ...

To see him grow to love him more ....

Toh phir kyu kehti ho ki or zindagi baaki nhi tum main ? ...

Pata hai ... Kitna dard hota hai kitna dar lagta hai ... Jab har pal yahi khayal satata hai ... Ke tum kabhi bhi door ho sakti ho mujhse ...

Main ... Apni zindagi ko ek or baar harta nhi dekh sakta naaz ... Or tumhe khokar toh bilkul bhi nhi ...

Jeena hai tumhe ... Mere saath mere liye ... Hamare liye ...

He stopped .... As she looked at him ... Her eyes welled up ...

As she hugged him ...

Sorry ... Ajj ke baad kabhi nhi kahungi ke jeena nhi chahti ...

Akhir haarne se pehle kyu haaru ?.... Marne se pehle hi kyu har pal maru ? ...

Marne se pehle ek baar jeena chahti hu ... Aapke saath ...

Main bas ab tumhe kho nhi sakta naaz ... he whispered in his mind not expressing but hugging her close ...

Main nhi jaanta kyu ?... Par bohot kuch ho tum mere liye ...

Tera mera rishta hai kaisa ?
Ek pal door gawara nhi

Tere liye har roz hai jeete
Tujh ko diya mera waqt sabhi

Main jeena chahti hu sidharth ... Apke saath main ... Aapke sath apni zindagi bitana chahti hu ... Aapke saath apni zindagi baat na chahti hu... She whispered

Marna nhi mujhe bhi ... Bohot kismat se paaya hai maine apko ... Ab chorh kar nhi jaana .... Atleast ...

Kuch waqt ...toh kismat de hi sakti hai mujhe apke sath ... Her mind spoke ...

Koi lamha mera na ho tere bina
Har saans pe naam tera

Kyu ki tum hi ho
Ab tum hi ho

Zindagi ab tum hi ho ❤️

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