Tomisin was one of my classmates too. He was cute and I liked him, though he probably didn't know I existed.

One day, he just walked up to me and decided to talk to me. It was a very weird experience cause we never spoke and this day he spent the whole day with me. He smiled at me, laughed at my jokes, made his own jokes, even helped me with my bag when I struggled to pick it up.

This went on for weeks. Then he asked me to date him. I had never dated anyone. I didn't even know anything about it or what to do about the fact that he asked. I agreed for a while, then all of a sudden, we stopped talking.

He just stopped talking to me. Didn't say hi, didn't tell me what I did wrong. Pretended as though I wasn't there, then I went to talk to him. It was awkward because I had gotten a little attached to him. My efforts couldn't have gone to waste.

He saw me and heard when I spoke to him but pretended as though I wasn't talking or I didn't exist or he couldn't hear me. His pride was quite amusing, because I knew it'll hurt him in the end.

But right then I was the one that was hurt. This was extremely petty. Even for him. I thought he was mature. I thought wrong. He broke up with me in the dumbest way and I had no idea how to take it. I simply said ok, and moved on.

It was after all of this, that I realized the truth. I had been so blinded by something that I didn't see it as it was. I had lost the first person that I thought actually cared. He never really cared though. He was just in it for what I couldn't give him and for the challenge. I was such a pitiful sight. I felt hurt and betrayed. Didn't even know how else to feel.

But I smiled and took it. Heartbreak never felt more painful, but motivating.

In a world where no one is really who they say they are, it is pretty easy to put up walls and hide behind a facade. Having people pretend to be something they never were just to get me or hurt me, always weakened my resolve. It always made me conflicted. I didn't know what really was or wasn't. What was really there or what wasn't.

Sometimes, I sat down and tried to imagined my dreams happening. Tried to imagine me living the life I wanted to live. Having my desires handed to me on a silver platter. I tried simply dreaming of what will never be.

I couldn't. I could only wish myself into one of those fantasy worlds from the books I'd read. Then I snapped to reality... More like reality slapped me in the face. I could never have that.