tw: self-harm

"May plans ka sa birthday mo, Sam? Like last time, club ulit?" 

My chewing slowed down after Luna asked the question. It was another Saturday, and we were eating along España because I didn't want to eat alone. Clyden went out to a coffee shop today to study with his friends the whole day. Unti-unti na siyang mas nagiging busy habang palapit nang palapit ang December. 

I almost forgot about my birthday. These past few weeks, I had been focusing more on my studies and also on my new relationship with Clyden. If Luna didn't remind me about it, I would have just let it pass. 

"I think so. Wala naman akong ibang way to celebrate but to be with my friends. Yanna can't go, though," I said with a hint of loneliness in my voice. I knew Yanna wouldn't go even if i-invite ko siya because there would be so many people, and she didn't want to be found. Maybe we'll just celebrate my birthday on another day.

"Sam, baka hindi ako makapunta. UAAP season, e. Training," Sevi said as he was typing on his phone. He didn't even look at us. Kanina pa siya text nang text at minsan natatawa pa. Hindi ko alam kung nagtitingin siya ng memes or what. 

"It's okay. Fight well!" I gave him a smile though he didn't see it because he didn't even give me back a single glance. Luna stared at Sevi for a moment before smirking and rolling her eyes. 

"Sam, please don't invite him," Luna suddenly begged after realizing that I was also friends with her ex. "Please! Please!" 

"Luna, kapag nalaman niyang invited ka, I think he won't go," I told her honestly. Kalix was always like that. 

Upon mentioning Luna's name, he would automatically say no to my invites. Sometimes, he would ask if Luna was invited beforehand bago siya pumunta and I didn't want to lie, even though I really wanted them to finally see each other. There was too much avoiding on both sides. I didn't know how long they could go. They were both so good at avoiding. These bitter people, really. 

"Sino'ng pipiliin mo? Ako o siya? 'Di ba ako?! I'm your friend since high school! Ako dapat ang a-attend sa birthday mo at hindi siya so huwag mo siyang i-invite or else hindi ako pupunta!" Luna sounded like a kid. 

"Bitter mo naman." Kierra laughed at her before taking a bite of her pizza. 

"Porket kasi ikaw..." Luna glanced at Kierra and suddenly stopped talking. The side of her lips slowly formed a devilish smile before taking a sip of her juice like she was holding so much power against her cousin. 

"Via, where's Arkin?" I asked her when I noticed that she was extra quiet today. She was staring at her plate for too long, but when I asked her about her best friend, her head shot up to look at me with wide eyes. 

"Shooting," maikling sagot niya. "Ata," she added. "Hindi ko alam. Si Sevi ang tanungin mo." 

"Hala, bakit ako?" Sevi held his chest like he was attacked by the tone of Via's remark. "Bakit parang galit ka sa 'kin, Avianna? Last na kita ko roon, noong nag-gym kami!" 

"Inaagawan mo na kasi siya ng best friend!" singit ni Luna sa usapan. "Mang-aagaw ka raw kasi, eh! Actually, selos lang 'yan! Yieee!" 

"Ang cute mo talaga, Luna. Walang maaagaw kung walang magpapaagaw. 'Di ba? Ay, pasmado bibig ko. Sorry!" Sevi covered his mouth dramatically and raised his other hand as a sign of apology but his expression said otherwise. He looked like he just achieved something. 

"Kaya walang lumalandi sa 'yo kasi ganyan ugali mong hayop ka!" Luna yelled back at him, medyo napipikon na. 

"Sure ka walang lumalandi sa 'kin?" Sevi raised a brow, smirking. 

I laughed and shook my head before finishing my plate. I just let them quarrel on the table because it was their normal bond. Good thing Yanna wasn't around, or else the table would have already turned by now. Those three were so good at pissing each other off, and knowing Yanna, hindi pa 'yon nagpapatalo. 

In the table, Kierra and Via were the most responsible but their difference was that Via was calmer than Kierra. Si Kierra, mabilis mairita at mapikon kaya hindi ko rin alam kung paano niya nakakayanan makipagsabayan kay Luna knowing how loud and carefree she was. 

When I went home, Clyden was still out, so I just spent the whole day planning my birthday. I made calls and invitations after reserving a club with the help of Raylee. I also informed my dad about it. Actually, sanay na sila dahil every birthday ko naman may ganoon. My mom was never in favor of it kaya lagi kong sinasabi na it was a formal and elegant party para pumayag siya. My parties were the total opposite of formal and elegant. It was always a beautiful disaster because guests came from different schools and circles of friends. 

I was also already planning to introduce Clyden to my friends but I still wasn't sure if he was available. Sobrang busy na niya and occupied sa studies niya ngayon pero hindi pa rin naman niya nakakalimutang magluto para sa lunch box kong binabaon ko sa school. He was really determined to learn how to cook various dishes and he was improving day by day.

I had just finished brushing Hail's fur when the door opened. The dogs automatically ran to Clyden when they smelled his presence. Tumayo na rin ako at ngumiti sa kanya. He looked at me after giving the dogs a pat on their heads. He looked extra tired today. I just knew that he didn't sleep at all last night because when I woke up, the bedsheet was still in its place. 

"Hey," he greeted me while walking in my direction. I placed the brush down on the table so I could welcome him with wide arms. He automatically went to me and gave me a tight hug, leaning his head against my shoulder and relaxing his body. "I missed you," he whispered. 

"You should rest more. You studied all day. I think that's enough," I told him as I played with his hair. 

"It's never enough," he said, laughing a bit. Umayos siya ng tayo at hinawakan ang baywang ko. I looked up to him because of his height. Matangkad na ako pero mas matangkad pa siya sa 'kin. 

"Relax your brain tonight and come sleep with me, please?" I pouted, hoping that my tactic would work. I really just wanted him to rest. He was pushing himself too hard. 

He stared at me for a moment before giving my forehead a kiss. "Okay. I'll just take a shower." 

I already took a shower, so I just went up to brush my teeth and do my skincare while waiting for him to finish taking a bath. I sat down on the bed and leaned my back against the frame while scrolling through my phone. I received so many replies to my invitation, and almost all of them said yes, so I was a bit nervous about the chaos approaching. 

I looked up when Clyden sat beside me, fresh from the shower. He was using the towel placed around his neck to dry his hair. His masculine scent invaded the room, which made me feel so many things. Even though we had been sleeping together for a few weeks now, we had not really made progress, and I wasn't also sure if we should talk about it or not. 

Not that I was that thirsty for him, geez! I was just... conscious dahil hindi ko alam kung gusto ba niyang pag-usapan o hindi, kung gusto ba niyang gawin o hindi, kung may balak ba siya o wala. Oh well, I should just go with the flow.

"Bakit tunog nang tunog phone mo?" nagtatakang tanong niya sabay tingin sa phone ko. Mukhang gusto niyang kuhanin pero hindi niya ginawa. 

"Nothing. I was sending invites earlier to my party. Do you want to come? It's next week, Saturday." I didn't know if I should mention my birthday or not. Hindi ko nga alam kung aware siya sa birthday ko. I wanted to test if he would remember it. 

"Saturday?" He looked up while he was thinking, then he checked the calendar on his phone. I thought he was going to mention my birthday, but he didn't. "Hindi ako pwede. May bibisitahin kaming hospital nila Ridge tapos mag-aaral kami pagkatapos. May dalawang major exams kasi kami sa Monday. I'm sorry." 

Though I felt a slight pain in my chest, I still gave him a small smile. "It's okay. Your exams are more important! Ace it! Relax your brain for now. Let's rest!" 

He nodded before putting his towel inside the bathroom. Humiga na 'ko sa kama at nilapag ang phone ko sa side table pagkapatay ng ilaw. I also turned the lamp on, leaving a little source of light around the room. Naramdaman kong humiga na rin siya at nagtakip ng braso sa mga mata niya, a sign that he was still thinking. I could hear him whisper some medical terms like he was memorizing.

"I told you to sleep," inis na sabi ko sa kanya. He stopped mumbling and let out a small laugh. He purposely did that to annoy me. 

"Tinitingnan ko lang kung may naaalala ako sa inaral ko kanina. I always do it before I sleep," he explained and continued mumbling. 

I closed my eyes and just waited for him to stop, but he just wouldn't. Did he study all of those in just one day? How come he could still remember? He was so good at memorization. 

When the mumbling stopped, I felt his arms on my stomach, pulling me closer to him, so I moved with my eyes still closed. He planted a soft kiss on my shoulder before whispering good night. I checked if he was already asleep after a few minutes before giving him a kiss on the tip of his nose. I admired him for a moment before I actually fell asleep. 

The next morning was a Sunday, and it was a rule between us na kapag Sunday, we should go out and do something. I wondered what we would do today. We failed to talk about it last night, so I had no clue what it would be. 

Nauna akong magising sa kanya dahil bumabawi siya ng tulog at mukhang hindi siya magigising after lunch kaya kumain na lang ako mag-isa. Pinaliguan ko na rin 'yong dogs and let them run around to dry themselves. I took so many pictures of Maple because she was so cute, like a bear. I posted it on my Instagram story and Luna replied with, 'bb bear!!! <3'. 

Even after taking a shower, Clyden was still asleep, so I just went to the living room to arrange his things. He left his books on the coffee table, and I got curious, so I opened the thickest one only to be surprised to see so many highlighted words and Post-it bookmarks on the corner with different colors. He still looked so organized when studying. Color-coded ang highlights niya. I suddenly felt bad for him. It must be hard to study all of these. 

Ang dami rin niyang ballpen at highlighter sa pencil case niya. His handwriting looked a little messy pero naiintindihan ko pa rin naman. He was probably practicing his signature because I saw a paper full of them, which made me laugh a little. It was also the time when I discovered that he drew well! He drew so many illustrations, and he was also good at coloring and labeling them. They looked so great. 

I just realized that we really didn't know much about each other, especially small things like this. I sighed and just finished arranging his things inside his bag before going up to change my clothes. Mukhang mamaya pa siya magigising kaya pupunta muna ako sa mansion para mag-bake kasama si Naomi. She was really looking forward to it. 

I just left a note beside the table to let Clyden know that I was leaving, kahit pwede ko namang i-text. I just wanted to be extra. I drove to the mansion after that, bringing the ingredients and materials Clyden and I bought. Iniwan ko 'yong ibang ingredients dahil sabi ni Clyden magbe-bake din daw siya. 

"Ate!" Naomi ran down the stairs when she saw my car through the window. I welcomed her with a warm smile. Mom probably wasn't around because Naomi could act freely like this. "Are we baking brownies?!" 

She sounded so excited, which made me smile wider. "Yes! Let's go! I even bought matching aprons!" 

She almost jumped out for joy before we went to the kitchen to prepare. I had my laptop beside the table so we could check the instructions. It wasn't my first time baking, so I kind of already knew what to do, but it was still better to have a guide. I taught Naomi how to mix and what to mix. I also helped her crack an egg, which she wasn't really good at, but it was fine. 

"It's so hard to mix!" she complained, looking like she was already about to cry. 

"Here." I held her wrist to guide her but suddenly stopped when she flinched. I looked at her with wide eyes when I felt a scar against my palm. I parted my lips and slowly let her go when she looked uncomfortable. 

She pursed her lips and gave me a small smile that didn't even reach her eyes. "Okay! Next step!" She sounded enthusiastic to cover up what had just happened. I felt like she really didn't want to talk about it, so I just remained silent. 

"L-let's continue!" I also matched the tone of her voice, but deep inside, I was already overthinking. 

After doing everything, we just waited for the brownies to bake. She sat on the high chair and watched some photography videos on YouTube. I heard that she attended the photography workshop I recommended last week. She was really determined to learn. 

"Did you really want to take Pol Sci?" I asked, sitting across from her. 

Her head shot up to look at me, not pausing the video on her phone. She looked like she was still thinking of what to say. Mukhang hindi niya rin alam ang isasagot niya. 

"I thought I wanted it," she said in a soft voice before looking away. "Turns out I just wanted validation." 

I pursed my lips. I didn't know what to say because I knew how hard it was for her and how I got it all so easily. "I'm sorry," I whispered. 

I thought she wouldn't reply back, but she actually held my hand above the table and gave me a smile. "It's not your fault that your parents love you."

"And everything that's happening is also not your fault." I suddenly had the urge to cry, but the alarm went off, so I had to get the brownies inside the oven. 

They turned out so great. We waited for it to cool down before we actually took a bite. It was a little sweeter than usual, but Naomi still loved it, and she looked so proud that she baked something. 

"You look great when you're happy," I suddenly told her. 

Her smile faded a bit when she looked back at me, but it returned wider. "Come on, stop being so cheesy." She rolled her eyes and laughed. 

When I came back to the house, Clyden was finally awake. However, he was too busy studying to even notice me. Nagtatampo ako sa kanya dahil wala kaming nagawa ngayong araw pero okay na rin dahil nakapunta ako kay Naomi. I didn't know what to feel. I kind of wanted to get mad at Clyden for sleeping for too long but it was such a lame reason to get mad and he probably won't even get bothered by it. Busy siya sa pag-aaral niya para mapansin pang galit ako so I just let it pass. 

I was about to go upstairs, but he suddenly talked. "You won't greet me?" he said without giving me a glance. He was highlighting his book. 

"Hey," I said, giving him a fake smile. 

He sighed before looking at me, still holding the highlighter in his hand. "I know you're mad. I'm sorry. Babawi ako sa 'yo. Let me just finish this." 

"Hey, no, it's fine!" I panicked and waved my hands in front of me. "Just focus on your exam. I'm tired from baking, so I'll just sleep early." 

I didn't wait for his answer anymore and just went upstairs, feeling a bit mad now. Maybe it wasn't because he slept for too long, but it was because there was still no mention of my birthday! Hindi ba talaga niya alam? Or was he just pretending? I doubt! Baka sobrang busy niya lang at nakalimutan na niya! 

It was really annoying that he couldn't come to my party, but his reason was acceptable. He had to study, but I can't help but feel sad about it. Ugh, I didn't want to feel like this. I didn't want to be 'that' kind of person. 

"Get over it, Samantha," I whispered. 

The next morning, Clyden woke up earlier than me, or maybe he didn't sleep at all. I couldn't really tell. My lunchbox was already left on the breakfast table, and he was already gone. He still left a note saying that he had to go early so he could still study before his exam. I accepted that one, of course. 

Days went by so fast. Nothing really changed except the fact that Clyden slept three consecutive nights in his condo because he said driving was a waste of time during his busy week. I was so close to getting mad at him, but his reasons were all valid, so I couldn't do anything about it! I just can't help but to sulk on it alone. 

"Yo! Tuloy party bukas, ah? May attire na 'ko!" Adonis sat beside me while I was eating at Gonz with my friends. "Wow, may lunch box! Cute naman niyan! Nagtitipid ka, Sam? Bago 'yon, ah!" 

"No, Clyden made it for me," I said, still staring at my food. "By the way, is Kalix coming to my birthday? Napilit n'yo ba?" 

"Wala, ayaw niya. Alam mo naman! Maarte 'yon, eh," he said out loud, so he had to look around to check if Kalix heard him or not. Nakahinga siya nang maluwag nang makitang busy bumibili ng shake si Kalix. "Huwag mo 'ko sumbong, ah! Pero kami ni Leo pupunta! Pass lang ako sa mga chicks, dude!" 

"Wow, you have someone you like now?" I asked, raising my brows. 

"I have someone who likes me now," he corrected. "Just kidding!" 

"Hey, I liked you before, remember?" Nakakatawa pala kapag naaalala ko. He used to tease me about it ever since we became friends. Ngayon, nagtataka na rin ako sa sarili ko. How embarrassing. 

"Oo, kaso hindi talaga kita type, Sam, eh." He fixed his hair before smirking at me. "Pasensya ka na, ah," mayabang na sabi niya which made me roll my eyes. This guy, really. 

While I was on my way home, I called Yanna just to check on her. Due na siya a few months from now. Habang palapit nang palapit, I was worried that it would hurt more for her. I watched so many labor videos, so I knew how painful it was to go through pregnancy, especially when she was alone without her family. 

[Happy birthday!] Yanna shouted when she answered the call. 

"Friday pa lang, Yanna," I corrected her, although I knew she did that on purpose. "You probably can't come to my party, right? Let's just video call on Sunday." 

[Malungkot ka? Ano ka ba, okay lang 'yan! Ang daming birthday mo nang kasama ako 'no! Okay 'to kasi mas mase-celebrate mo na kasama jowa mo!] 

"I don't even know if aware siyang birthday ko sa Sunday." I rolled my eyes in annoyance.

[Alam niya naman siguro 'yan! Don't worry! Mas mag-alala ka sa pechay mo dahil hanggang ngayon, hindi ka pa rin nadidiligan! Hahahaha!] She laughed so hard to piss me off but her laugh was contagious so I just ended up laughing with her. 

When I got home, I noticed Clyden's car in the garage, so he was probably home already after three days without him! This jerk! Hindi ko tuloy siya pinansin pagkapasok ko. I gave all my attention to my dogs. 

"Hi," Clyden greeted me, but I purposely ignored him. He was in the kitchen, cooking something while holding a book. I didn't even give him a glance and just went straight upstairs. 

I took a shower and did some school work before going downstairs, only to see Clyden serving the food he had cooked. He looked like he wanted to invite me to eat dinner with him, but he couldn't seem to open his mouth to talk. 

Umupo na lang ako sa harapan niya kaya nakahinga siya nang maluwag. He also sat in front of me and was about to put rice on my plate but I shook my head. 

"Diet," he said, nodding and putting the bowl down. "Nagluto ako ng gulay para sa 'yo." His tone was so careful, like I was a monster he didn't want to offend. 

"Should I thank you for that?" I asked without looking at him. 

He pursed his lips and shook his head slightly, which made me feel guilty. That was so mean, Samantha! Hindi na tuloy ako mapakali! 

I wanted so badly to apologize but my pride was so over the top at the moment because he obviously forgot about my birthday. Kapag hindi pa niya nabanggit ngayong gabi, hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko sa kanya! 

"Ako na magliligpit," he said when I was about to get my plate. Binitawan ko tuloy at tinalikuran na siya. I heard his heavy sigh before I went upstairs.

I was cursing the mirror while I was brushing my teeth, imagining that it was Clyden. I never wanted to fight with the mirror so badly! Tinuro-turo ko pa habang bumubulong ako. Ganoon ako kaasar sa kanya. I sighed again to calm myself before I went inside the master's bedroom. 

Humiga na 'ko at pinikit ang mga mata ko. Tomorrow na 'yong celebration ko so I needed some beauty sleep. Hindi ko na hinintay si Clyden na umakyat at natulog na lang ako. 

When I woke up, he was already gone. I didn't even expect him to be downstairs anymore since he already mentioned last week about his hospital visit with Ridge today. Tama nga ako at maaga siyang umalis, but he still left a text message to inform me. Mas lalo lang lumala ang tampo ko sa kanya but I couldn't do anything. 

I just rested the whole day while waiting for the right time to prepare. It was around five in the afternoon when I started getting ready for the party. I decided to just wear a black bodycon strap dress with a deep v-neck. It was also backless, ending just above my hips with a crossed strap. My hair was already ending below my shoulders. I just curled them a bit before braiding a few strands in front. 

I had to be extra because it was my birthday, so I also put on some jewelry. I kind of wished Clyden was around to see my outfit for today, but he wasn't. He was busy studying. It was fine. It was for his future all along. For our future. 

I went to the club early so I could coordinate with the organizers about the design. I also helped arrange tables for the visitors, putting their names per table. I made sure everything was okay before the party. 

Little by little, the venue started to get crowded. I was at the main door, greeting my friends and guiding them to their tables. Almost everyone was holding a present, so I put a gift corner where they could leave their gifts.

"Happy birthday, Sammy!" Luna gave me a hug. "Wala si Sev! Si Ke tsaka Via kasama ko!" 

"It's okay! Thank you!" Kierra and Via also gave me a hug after greeting me with a happy birthday. Luna was consciously looking around, so I laughed. "He's not here, don't worry." 

"Hinahanap ba kasi ayaw makita o hinahanap kasi gustong makita?" Kierra asked, smirking. 

"Happy birthday, Sam!" I looked at Shan, who had just entered the club with his other friends. Sina Neil. 

Shan bumped against Kierra, making her step back a bit. She glared at him before walking away to find their table. I laughed and just continued greeting other guests until the party started for real. I went to the stage to drink the first shot for the night before everyone started drinking. 

I couldn't drink since I was busy going around to welcome everyone to my party. "Hello!" I greeted Lewis, the one I dated back then. 'Yong football player na nireto ni Adonis. 

"Hi, Sam. Happy birthday!" He gave me a small hug before getting a bottle of beer. We talked about Adonis for a bit while his hand was still on my waist. I thought it was just a friendly habit. I laughed when Adonis pointed at him. 

"Hoy, backstabber!" Adonis scowled. "Uy, si Luna! Nandito talaga! Mukhang blooming, ah!" 

"I'll just go to my friend's table," paalam ko kina Lewis. 

When I turned around, I was shocked to see Clyden holding a small paper bag. He was wearing a dark blue button-down polo shirt tucked inside his black slacks with a designer belt on. His hair was brushed a bit to the side, making him look more formal than usual. However, his eyes were fixed on my waist... with Lewis' hand holding it. 

He sighed heavily before turning around and pulling Ridgen with him. Ridge looked so confused, but he still put the bottle of beer down on the table and followed Clyden out. I massaged my head and muttered a curse before running to catch up with him. 

"Hey!" I shouted, but he still continued walking to the parking lot. The club had its own parking lot with two floors. Clyden probably parked on the underground level since he stopped in front of the elevator, letting go of Ridgen's sleeve. 

"Huwag mo 'ko idamay, p're! Lukot na tuloy!" Ridgen tried to straighten the crease on his shirt. 

Clyden didn't respond to him. He just put his hands inside his pocket, and when the elevator opened, he went inside and pushed the close button so fast. However, I managed to put my hand in between the doors. When Ridgen saw me, he stopped and just let me walk inside the lift. 

"Balik na 'ko sa loob, ah," Ridgen carefully said before running away like he was scared of Clyden. 

Both of us were quiet inside the elevator. I bit my lower lip, a little nervous about the overall aura of his. It was too dark, heavy, and serious. Hindi pa nga ako umiinom at isang shot lang 'yon ng tequila pero pakiramdam ko nag-iinit na ako dahil sa nerbyos. 

The elevator opened, and he left me again. He was taller than me, so it was so easy for him to keep his distance using his legs. He opened the door of his car and went inside. The light on the side where he parked was broken, so it was a bit dark. Mabuti na lang nabuksan ko rin ang pinto at umupo ako sa shotgun seat. 

"What are you doing? Bumalik ka roon. Birthday mo," he said, looking at me with his brows furrowed.

"So you knew about my birthday?" I raised a brow. 

"How could I not? I spent the whole fucking day looking for a nice gift only to see you having fun with another guy. Who has the right to get mad now, huh?" He was controlling his anger. It was so evident in his voice. 

He started the engine and turned the aircon on. He sighed heavily and leaned his elbow against the steering wheel, massaging the bridge of his nose. I looked in front and crossed my arms over my chest, waiting for him to calm down before I talked. 

"Bumalik ka na," he said more calmly. "Aalis na 'ko." 

"No, you can't leave," I said in a stubborn tone. He looked at me with frustration in his eyes before pushing his chair backward to give himself more space. 

[r-18.]

"Sino ba 'yon?" he asked, trying to control his emotions. "Bakit ang saya-saya mo? You ignored me the whole week. May iba ka na ba?" He sounded in pain. "Ganoon ba 'yon? Sawa ka na ba sa 'kin?" 

I felt a punch in my chest when I saw his doubtful eyes. I bit my lower lip before facing him to touch his face. I forced him to look at me and leaned to give him a soft kiss. He closed his eyes a little when he looked down at me, but he was so unresponsive. 

"No. I love you, okay? I just thought you forgot about my birthday, so I was mad," I explained softly, my lips still inches away from him. 

"It wouldn't be a surprise if you knew," he whispered back, getting hypnotized by my kisses and my scent. 

He stared at me for a moment before holding my nape and pulling me closer to him so he could kiss me deeper. I opened my mouth and sucked on his tongue when he pushed it inside me. His hands slowly reached for my waist and pulled me towards his position, forcing me to move from the shotgun seat to his seat. 

I straddled his hips, the hem of my dress going up to my legs, revealing my lace panties. He placed his hands on my thighs before kissing me again. I was hovering on top of him, so he had to look up. I almost yelled in shock when he pushed the backrest a little backward. 

"Is it okay to do this here?" I consciously looked around, only to see no one. 

"It's tinted," he whispered before pulling on my nape to kiss me again.

His kisses went from my mouth down to my neck, where he playfully licked and sucked lightly, careful not to leave any marks. I bit my lower lip when his hand slowly brushed on my thighs, pushing the hem of my dress upwards until it reached my stomach. I could feel his bulge in between my legs, making me feel more heated and wet down there. 

"Take it off," he said as he played with the strap of my dress. 

I nodded like a good girl and took the straps off my shoulder. As soon as it left my arms, he pulled it down, revealing my mounds. I didn't have time to react anymore because he started kissing and sucking on it while he was massaging the other one, brushing his thumb on my nipples. 

"Cy," I moaned when he grabbed me harder. He massaged and licked alternately to give both of my mounds equal attention before kissing my neck again down to my collarbone. He was playing with my chest with both of his hands now like an expert. 

My hands started unbuttoning his polo while he was kissing me, pushing his tongue inside my mouth to taste every corner of me. When I successfully unbuttoned his shirt, I pushed it over his shoulders so he could take it off, and so he did. He threw it on the backseat and went back to kissing. I hissed when I felt his hand slowly going in between my legs. He stopped kissing me when he pushed my panties aside to touch my wetness with his fingers. 

"So this is what it feels like," he whispered, laughing a little. 

"Do you know what to do?" I teased him back. I was about to laugh at him when he suddenly dug a finger inside me, making me moan in his ear. 

"I think so," he answered, smirking now. 

His finger suddenly left me when I was already feeling it. I looked at him in confusion, and he looked back at me with serious dark eyes. 

"Turn around," he commanded. 

I changed my position from facing him with my legs straddling his hips to just sitting pretty on his thighs with my body facing the steering wheel. Good thing the backrest was reclined so I wouldn't hurt my head. 

His hand went in between my legs again to pull my panties down to my legs. My eyes widened when I saw a group of people walking in the parking lot, malapit sa amin. Clyden wrapped his arms around my waist to pull me back in place when he successfully pushed my panties down. I helped him take it off. 

"May tao, Cy," I looked back at him. 

"It's okay," he whispered before pushing my hair away from my shoulder so he could kiss my neck. "Aren't you thrilled?" 

"Aren't you? It's your first time," I teased back. 

"My goal is not to make you feel like it's my first time. Tell me if I'm doing something wrong," he said before pushing a finger inside me, making me moan. He covered my mouth with his other hand when the group of people walked past his car. "Shush." 

He started thrusting his finger inside me and stopped to massage my clit with his thumb. I was shocked that he found it so fast. Did he study that one too? 

I leaned my back against his chest when he started thrusting his fingers faster inside me. He touched my thigh and hung it on his other thigh so he could spread my legs wider. I bit my lower lip and held onto his arm while he adjusted his pace. 

"Is it okay?" he asked, and I nodded. I yelled his name when he adjusted his hand and hit the right spot. 

"That's better." Halos hindi na 'ko makapagsalita. When I felt like something was already building up in my stomach, he stopped fingering me and made us change our positions. He made me go back to the shotgun seat before spreading my legs wider while facing him. I never felt so exposed! 

"What are you- Oh my god." 

I held on to the backrest when he started sucking on my wetness before pushing his tongue inside me. He looked at me for a moment to see my reaction before pushing another finger. His finger mimicked the pace of his tongue inside me, making me explode. 

"Please, let's..." I couldn't talk anymore. 

He nodded and made me move back to the driver's seat, with him seated and leaning against the reclined seat and me on top of him, straddling his hips. I fumbled on his belt and pushed it down until he was only left with his black designer boxers. I licked my lower lip and touched the bulge on it, feeling how large he was. 

"Ah," he groaned when I started rubbing on him. 

I pushed it down on his legs again, and he helped me with it. My eyes widened when his member proudly stood in between my legs. He looked away, feeling a little embarrassed. I laughed at his reaction before wrapping my hands around him, making him close his eyes. 

"Do you have a condom with you?" I asked him while I was moving my hands up and down his member. He nodded and licked his lower lip before reaching for a box inside his mini-compartment. "Why the hell do you have a box with you?" Kumunot ang noo ko. 

"I bought one for you. God, don't hold it too tight." He sounded in pain because I unconsciously squeezed his member on my hand when I asked the question. 

"Do you know how to put it on?" I teased again, trying to stop myself from smiling. 

"Ano'ng tingin mo sa 'kin? Kahapon lang pinanganak?" masungit na sabi niya sabay kuha ng pack sa loob ng box. Upon opening the foil pack, the condom almost slipped on his fingers because of the lubricant. I laughed when I noticed that he was nervous. 

"Hey, relax. I got this," I whispered, smirking. 

He looked at me with dark eyes before smoothly sliding the condom on his member. I didn't have time to react because he held my waist to push me up, positioning his member in between my legs. I held on to the backrest and slowly pushed my hips down, but I had a hard time because of the pain I felt. 

Damn, he was fucking huge. I felt like my insides were being stretched. He looked at my face, closely watching my reaction and panicking a bit. 

"Masakit ba?" nag-aalalang tanong niya. 

"No," I denied, but my expression said otherwise. I pushed my body down until he was completely inside me, making him sigh. I was already panting while adjusting to his size. I shouldn't fail him! I had to move! 

I started moving my hips on top of him until the pain was already gone. I held on to the backrest, just beside his head, and started moving my hips up and down over him. He held my waist and guided me, groaning a little. 

"Cy," I moaned into his ear as I adjusted my position, making him hit my most sensitive spot. His hands went around my ass to help push my hips against his. I circled my hips before going down on him again. 

"Fuck," he whispered before wrapping his arms around my waist, keeping me in place. I moaned on his neck when he started pushing himself up to meet my hips. I started kissing his lips, but the kisses were getting sloppier as I felt my stomach tighten. 

I was moaning until I felt my legs shaking. He gave one full thrust before I felt my release. He gave more slow thrusts inside me while releasing his juice. Napasandal na lang ang ulo ko sa balikat niya habang hinahabol ang hininga ko. We were both sweating, but it felt so good. 

"Let's clean up. We need to go back to the party," he whispered while playing with my hair. "How was it?" 

"You feel so good," I whispered in a little voice. I was too tired to talk. "I'm tired. Let's go home." 

"Hindi pa nga nagsisimula party mo, uuwi na kaagad? Magbihis ka na. Babalik pa tayo roon." He kissed my forehead before lightly pushing me away. "Come on. Let's get dressed, Maui." 

I sighed and nodded before going to the shotgun seat to fix my dress. There was already a crease on it, but since it was black, it wasn't that obvious. I fixed my hair and wiped my sweat. Nag-retouch na rin ako ng makeup habang binubutones niya ang polo niya. 

"Maureen," he suddenly called. 

"Yes?" I looked at him and waited for him to talk. 

He glanced at the time before giving me the small paper bag. "Happy birthday, love."

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:)