I was reading this thing on Insta and got this idea. I can't remember what it was exactly but I based some of this on it like the diary bit.

"Peter! You idiot."
MJ hissed when they were in the forest.

"What?"

"You left your diary from the 1900s out on your desk and it was open."

"I did? Oh shoot."

"You're an idiot Parker. I don't know how you managed to live this long without someone finding out."

"Same to be honest. Like you adapted much easier than me to the 21st century."

"You're a fucking idiot."

"Hey, that's mean!"

"Oh shut up Parker or I'll tell Dad what you wrote in your diary from the 80's about me."
Peter paled.

"Please don't. Please. I didn't mean to write that, I was angry at you because you stole my pen."

"Then don't leave your fucking diary's out in school. Who knows if some weird god hunter is out to kill Loki's last children and is in our school."

"Yeah right. No one knows we exist MJ. Apart from Dad and Uncle Thor."

"Yeah and remember who killed Dads first children? It was Uncle Thor. You moron."
MJ opened the door to the cabin in the forest.

"When is Dad coming back? I thought his punishment ended last month?"
Peter asked, sitting on the sofa.

"I dunno. I think Uncle Thor is babysitting him for like a year or something."
MJ said, taking out a bottle of Coke.

"Can I have a sip?"

"No."

"Meanie."

"I'm your older sister dipshit. I'm meant to be mean."
MJ ruffled Peter's curls.

"Yeah by like a fucking hour."
MJ slapped the back of Peter's head.

"No swearing."

"You swear!"

"I'm older. I boss you around."

"No fair."

"It is. Do you have any homework?"

"Yeah. Do you?"

"Nope. Most of my teachers are fucking dipshits and don't teach us anything."

"Why don't you say anything?"

"I don't get a lot of time to sketch peoples faces in distress. My sketchbook is mostly filled up of you making weird faces when you're doing your homework. And when you're stitching yourself up from being stabbed or shot on patrol."

"Oh thanks for that. You're such a lovely older sister."
Peter said sarcastically.

"I know I am."
MJ took her sketchbook out of her bag and a pencil and sat on the sofa opposite Peter.

"What?"

"I'm waiting for you to start your homework so I can sketch your face."

"You're such a bitch."
Peter mumbled, taking his homework sheets out of his bag.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Didn't say anything."
Peter quickly said.

"That's what I thought. Now come on, I'm the boss here since Dad is being babysat by Uncle Thor and I'm telling you to do your homework or you won't be allowed out for patrol."

"I hate you."

"I hate you too."

~~~

"Come on brother. It is the only safe space that isn't on the database."
Thor pleaded.

"I can't and won't bring all of you there."

"Come on Reindeer Games, we are going to die if we don't go to this place of yours."
Tony said, blasting aliens away.

"I'm going to regret this."
Loki muttered.

"Please brother. They will all promise to not say a word about them to anyone."
Thor said and shot the others a look.

"Yeah. We all promise not to tell anyone about this place."
Steve said, chucking his shield at aliens.

"Fine."
Loki said.

A portal opened up and the team went inside.

~~~

"PARKER! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU!"
Was what the Avengers heard when they were stood outside a cabin in the woods.

"Oh for gods sake."
Loki mumbled.

"I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO TOUCH YOUR PAINTBRUSHES!"
Someone shouted.

"He really shouldn't have touched her paintbrushes."
Loki commented.

"Aren't you worried that someone's going to die in this cabin?"
Steve asked.

"I'm more worried about blood getting all over the place."
Loki said.

He went up to the door and opened it.

"DO NOT KILL IN THIS HOUSE! I DON'T WANT BLOOD EVERYWHERE! IF YOU HAVE TO KILL YOUR BROTHER, KILL HIM OUTSIDE!"
Loki screamed.

"Ok! Thanks dad!"

"Dad! Why!"

A scream and a laugh was heard behind the cabin.

"Kids."
Loki rolled his eyes.

"Wait."
Both voices said at the same time.

"These two are probably the most slowest kids I've ever met. Even though they are the smartest kids in the world."
Loki told the team.

"Dad!"
Two teens came tumbling back inside from another door and hugged Loki.

"I thought you weren't going to be back for a while."
The girl said.

"Yes well something happened and I had to bring the team over."

"Shit."
The boy muttered and the girl smacked the back of his head.

"No swearing."
The girl said.

"Your sister's right Pete."

"She swears!"
'Pete' said.

"Michelle! I thought better off you."

"Well you thought wrong."
'Michelle' said.

"Right anyways. These are the idiots that my brother works with."
Loki pointed to the Avengers.

Scott and Clint were throwing sticks and stones to each other, Natasha was getting close to killing them, Steve was talking to Bucky, Wanda was shielding off the stray sticks and stones with her magic and talking to Vision Bruce was talking with Thor and Tony was staring at the family.

"They look like idiots."
MJ said and Peter snorted.

"They are."
Loki said.

"Ow! That hit my head."
Clint started crying and went over to Natasha.

"Serves you right for throwing sticks and stones."
She said.

"Come on you idiots. You can't stay out here forever, even though I really want to leave you all outside."
Loki said.

Everyone went inside and Peter and MJ were standing awkwardly at the side while everyone was looking at them.

"These are my children."
Loki said.

"I thought all of your children died. Well at least, that's what it says in the books about Norse mythology."
Bruce said.

"Well thankfully, Thor didn't kill my last two."
Loki said, glaring at Thor.

"Are you going to introduce yourselves?"
Tony asked.

"I'm Michelle Jones Lokisdotter and this is my younger twin brother Peter Parker Lokison. Please don't call me Michelle though, call me MJ."
MJ said.

"What was that all about? The screaming and chasing?"
Tony asked.

"Peter touched my paintbrushes."
MJ said.

"I had to make dinner!"

"You don't touch my paintbrushes. Tell me and I might move them."

"I hate you."

"I hate you too."

~~~

"When will you be back?"
Peter asked.

"I'm not sure. Thor still has to look over me and that means he will have to come here and I still don't trust him."
Loki said.

"But if you come over as Spidey, no one knows who you are and it'll be fine."
Loki whispered into Peter's ear.

"Bye Dad."
MJ said.

"Bye MJ. If you have to kill Peter, please do if outside. I really don't want blood all over the place."

"Fine."

~~~

"I miss Dad."
Peter said one morning.

"So do I Pete."

"I wish Odin listened to him when he said he didn't do it."

"Same."

"It was all Thanos' fault."

"Yeah."

"I really want to kill you MJ. You are really annoying."

"Cool."

"Do you think that technology is plotting to kill us?"

"That's nice."

"I knew it."

"Cool."

"Why aren't you listening to me?"

"Hm?"

"I hate you. Why weren't you listening to me?"

"Oh I was thinking about murdering you. It was gonna be with an icicle and then there's no murder weapon and the crime scene is already cleaned up."

"You wouldn't actually kill me?"

"Depends. If you touch my paintbrushes again, I will."

"Ok but please don't leave your paintbrushes in the sink."

"Fine."

~~~

Peter woke up in a sweat.

He looked around and realised it was just a nightmare.

He climbed out of his bed and went over to MJs room.

"MJ? You awake?"
He asked.

"I am now. What do you want?"

"I had a nightmare."
MJs eyes softened.

"Come here then."
Peter walked over and climbed in beside MJ.

"Now sleep."

"Ok."

~~~

"Dad told me he's coming home today. Thor's finally letting him come visit us."
MJ whispered to Peter during a very boring Chemistry class.

"Is he?"

"Yeah. Told me this morning."

"How?"

"He texted me Parker. You dumbass."

"Miss Jones and Mr Parker, would you like to share your conversation to the class?"
The old teacher said.

"No sir."
Peter said.

"Well don't talk in my lessons."

~~~

"Bye MJ."
Ned said and Peter waved to the girl.

They both leave at different times so that people don't realise that they are twins.

"So, you and MJ huh?"
Ned asked.

"What about me and MJ?"

"Are you gonna ask her out?"

"What? No way Ned. She's like a sister to me!"

"Yeah right."

"She is Ned. Just like you're like a brother to me."

"Dude come on."

"Anyways. I gotta get home. May is off work."
'May' was a code word that Peter used whenever Loki was coming home and he didn't use it often.

"Ok bye dude."

"Bye Ned."

~~~

"So what was Ned talking about this time?"
MJ asked.

"Why do you assume that Ned was talking about something?"

"Because you took longer to get to the meeting spot."

"Oh. He was asking me when I was gonna ask you out because he seems to think that I like you."
MJ snorted.

"That's disgusting."

"Yeah I said that you were like a sister to me but he didn't believe me."

"God, can't wait til we can tell him on his deathbed."

"Yeah why do we wait till the person is on their deathbed to tell them that we are Loki's children?"

"Dunno."

~~~

MJ was sketching the living room and Peter was sleeping when Loki came home.

"I'm home!"
He shouted.

"Hey Dad."
MJ said, looking up from her sketch.

"Did he get any sleep last night?"
Loki asked about Peter.

"Don't think so. When he came down this morning he had bags under his eyes and was very slow when moving which isn't like him."

Peter turned around so that he was lying on his back and his eyes fluttered open.

"What's up motherfuckers?"
Peter asked with a dazed look on his face.

"And hello to you too."
Loki said.

"Oh hey Dad."
Peter said, lying back down.

He froze then sat up quickly.

"Dad!"
Peter shouted and hugged Loki tightly.

"Hey Pete."

Peter let go and moved his legs so that Loki could sit next to them.

"This is awkward."
MJ said and Peter snorted.

"Yes well it is hard to have a conversation with your children when you haven't seen them for years and you only saw them once since your punishment ended and it was for like three hours and other people were there."
Loki said.

"I can see how you are definitely my dad."
MJ said.

"Come on. I'll make dinner."
Loki said and the three went into the dining room, knowing that Loki will just summon up the food and it will taste amazing.

~~~

"Do we have science next?"
Peter mouthed to Ned in music.

"What?"
Ned mouthed back.

"Do we have science next?"
Peter repeated.

Ned just had a confused look and waved his hand.

~~~

"Do we have science next?"
Peter asked when the class was over.

"Ohh. I thought you said do you want to have sex."
Peter started laughing. (That's what happened with me and one of my friends in Music. She thought I said 'do you want to have sex?' and not 'do we have science next?')

~~~

"What were you and Ned laughing about when you guys came into science?"
MJ asked in the forest.

"Well I mouthed to him 'do we have science next?' and he thought I had mouthed 'do you want to have sex?' and that's why we were laughing."

"You guys are weird."
MJ said.

"Yeah I know."

I love this idea and it won't have a part 2.

—Penguin🐧