Soon You'll Get Better

**TW: themes of depression, self harm, suicide attempt and is over all pretty angst**

For two hours you sat there, on the wooden steps into his house. For two hours, people milled about outside and inside giving each other hugs and condolences. For two hours, your mind ran around and tried to come up with a solution. But there was no solution. Anthony Edward Stark was dead, and nobody could do anything about it.

Pepper was hit really hard of course. Someone she had known for over 15 years died in front of her. Morgan was still a bit confused about the whole thing, but she understood he wasn't coming back. Peter was trembling and Aunt May held onto him as if he'd slip away again. Rhodey and Bruce/Hulk were trying to cope with losing a super close friend. Old Steve mourned with Sam for a while, then left to go return the stones. You felt awful for Bucky, who came in underdressed because he didn't expect to be invited, and he never had a chance to apologize to Tony. Everyone had such strong connections to Tony, so why would you, the high school intern he chanced on be in a pool of your own tears?

Eight years ago Tony had found you trying to break into the Avengers Tower. You were going in to steal tech and sell it on the black market. Rather than calling the cops, Tony asked you a very simple question: "Why?" It brought you to tears and you spilled everything about your life to Tony; the endless nightmares, abusive parents and past boyfriends, the bullies at school, and how you desperately needed to get away from home as often as possible. So, he offered you the internship.

Originally it started as a way for you to get away from home and have a quiet place to just study and do homework, even to sing a little bit. Then you started to hang out around the lab (there was a lot of confusion on your half with some problems, and he mostly hung out in the lab anyways) and pick up on some of the things him and Bruce worked on. Science became an interest, and Bruce introduced you a whole new world of biology. Your after school study spot became an actual internship with Bruce and Tony.

This led to you three having so much fun in the lab, including impromptu karaoke battles. Those were your favorite, and FRIDAY always said that you were the winner. But no matter who won, the three of you enjoyed yourselves.

Peter then became Tony's mentee and you felt a little pushed aside, but Tony made sure to always be there for you if you needed to break down, or even just to talk to. Things were okay. Tony was slightly stressed over Peter, but he managed his powers and life after awhile.

That's when the war from space came.

You were nothing but a smart mind, yet Bruce convinced you to come with him to Wakanda and help find a way to save Vision. It was so weird meeting all of the other Avengers for pretty much the first time, but your mind was occupied with worries over Tony.

Along with Shuri you tried your best to help with Vision, but her mind outweighed yours by a lot. So instead you tried to stay inside and offered any help you could to Shuri, Wanda, and/or Vision. You also sang to calm yourself (and seemingly everyone else) down.

When a member of the bad alien group came through the room. You looked around and found a very sharp thingy. Taking the biggest risk of your life, you ran up and stabbed the alien in the side with the sharp thing. He took a good hit, and then stabbed you in side. You let out a yelp and fell to the floor.

Vision tackled the alien out the window, and Shuri came to your aid. Shuri asked if you were okay. Clearly you weren't, so she took you to her medical table and helped stitch your side back up. As she did, Shuri faded away into nothing but dust.

It took until the remaining Avengers came to check on you that everything was explained. The big bad purple alien, Thanos, had snapped his fingers with some stones that cause half of the universe to disintegrate. Many of the Avengers had even been snapped away. Your head was spinning after the information take in, and you were terrified to find out Tony's fate.

~~

It had been a few weeks until there was any change. You had stayed with them to talk with Bruce and try to figure things out. Bruce noticed the complete change in your attitude. It had been weeks since you last sang at all.

When Carol Danvers showed up everyone was asking questions, and it finally ended with her going to retrieve Tony from wherever the hell he was. You were so relieved when he came back. It took a lot of restraint, but you made sure Pepper and Steve got to him first. It's not like you didn't want to say hi, it's just you felt you had no place to.

You waited in his new hospital room so you could update him on everything since he's left. Tony ended up coming into the room unconscious with a very concerned group behind him (well, Rhodey carrying him). You waited with Pepper somewhat awkwardly for Tony to wake up. You and Pepper spoke a bit, and you mostly told her that Tony helped you through tough times.

It took a couple hours, but Tony woke up and you were able to fill him in on your life. You told him about everything, including the stab wound from a not so friendly alien, and how much stress you were under while he was gone. He promised he would be staying. And he did for five years.

~~

You were now rolling into your third hour of sitting on the steps when Rhodey finally got you up. He brought you inside and made you drink some water and sat you down in the living area to just open up. He made sure you two had privacy, and you refused to say anything. Instead you got up and left to the room Pepper had set up for you in the house. Tony had it just in case things got to bad, and so Pepper decorated it and such.

The room had been used plenty, but this time felt so much more different. You thought your tears were all gone, but they all came back as you scanned over pictures of you Tony in random places doing random things, like fighting with prototype lightsabers. That was such a fun day. A picture of you two karaoke-ing and you laughing at his awful version of Taylor Swift's Blank Space. That was the day. I came to him crying my eyes out. He obviously cheered me up.

Now those days were gone, and you felt like you had lost all of your family. Your real family had disappeared as well, and you honestly didn't care enough to let them know you were fine. They could screw themselves for all you cared. There was so much pent up anger and hurt inside you, you needed to do something.

~~

The last seven months have been a cycle: locked in your room, cut when it got too much, and drink just a little bit of water. Pepper and Morgan were grieving together and you didn't want to bother them and avoided all contact with them. People stopped by and tried to talk to you but you refused to come out of your room. Even Bucky came over, and you did feel bad about turning him away; it just added another scar to the ever growing collection.

It was when Bucky tried the second time that something went wrong. You usually answered the door with a noise that meant go away. This time, there was no noise from you, but running water. Bucky knew this was bad, called down to Sam and the others, and broke the door open. Inside your bathroom was an unconscious you inside the bathtub with the water still running, and blood pouring out of so many cuts riddled along your body. Bucky ran to you with no hesitation and turned the water off, picked you up, wrapped you in a towel, and started to run downstairs. He shouted for Sam to get the car started and for Pepper to grab Morgan and get in that same car.

Sam drove, Pepper and Morgan sat shotgun, and Bucky held you on the backseat while also trying to stop the bleeding. Bucky was begging Sam to drive faster. Pepper held Morgan close to her and tried to explain the situation. They may not know you very well, but they all were hellbent on saving your life. You meant so much to Tony, they knew he'd do anything to keep you alive.

It took a couple hours but the doctors were able to get you into a stable condition and kept alive. Everyone who came with you to the hospital was now waiting outside your room for you to wake up. The doctors gave a positive outlook, but then made it bleak again by saying you very clearly had depression and would need serious help after this episode. After what had happened, with Tony's death and nearly yours, Pepper was ready to do anything to keep everyone where they were- alive.

When you woke up Pepper decided to talk to you first. She told you about the situation and you agreed to seeing a therapist. Maybe it could help, but you really only agreed to stop Pepper's worry.

~~

Now after three months, you were out of your room. No words had really been said yet, but the therapist assured you were getting better; after all, they'd been seeing you everyday since 'the incident'. Things were improving, even slightly. However, you found that really hard to believe.

You were in the kitchen while Pepper, Rhodey, Bruce/Hulk and Morgan were in the other room talking about whatever. As you rifled through the kitchen, you started to hum 'I See the Light'. It was a cute Disney song and one of your favorites. You took plates down and went to the fridge. All conversation in the other room stopped.

"She's singing again," Bruce whispered to the others.

And that's when you knew things were getting better.

~Fin~

A/N: What's up!! So I'm back-ish? I'm still not going to post as frequently as I used to, but I'm posting again! It's been long enough and Disney + has somewhat revitalized my love for Marvel and writing? We'll go with that.

Guys you have still been so active on here since I've taken my hiatus and it makes my day so much brighter!! I've been getting better and honestly got super excited to post this today that I postponed walking my dog so I could get this up 😂.

This imagine idea came to me after I saw Endgame the first time, and it's just been really hard trying to go in and write it. But I did! Sorry about the sensitive content but it's something I had planned for a while and needed to do, to show that you can get better.

Last bit: song attached is where the title came from (obv) and I though it was fitting. Especially cause it's coming from the Artist of the Decade!! (I love Taylor Swift and you cant change my mind).

Bye Lovelies!!!!