Dianium, summer 40 AD

From the gentle tickle of the sun's rays streaming in through the window, Aurelia cautiously turned onto her side and looked at her two men. Julius clung to Gaius' neck like a little monkey, and it was beyond her how Gaius could sleep like that. But both were breathing deeply and evenly. Aurelia closed her eyes, but she could find no peace. Carefully, Aurelia slipped out of her bed and crept noiselessly out of the room. Only when the door closed behind her without a sound did she dare to exhale and try to fix her tangled hair with her hand. Then she remembered where she was and abandoned her efforts.
Elated, she walked through the cool corridors of the villa, rejoicing in the warmth of the sun as she stepped out onto the narrow path in the garden. After a few minutes she reached the beach, curbing her pace as soon as the cool waters of the sea washed around her feet. This island was dreamlike. Happily, Aurelia closed her eyes and remembered the holidays to the sea with her parents in her old life. For hours she had walked through the surf with her parents and just enjoyed the weather. Blinking, Aurelia opened her eyes and began to walk through the gentle surf with a smile on her lips. Every now and then she bent down to pick up a particularly beautiful shell. Julius loved shells and already had a considerable collection on his dessert table. He had either found the shells together with his parents or had been given them by Aurelia after one of their morning walks.
On their morning walks, there was only the soft sand that their feet sank into, the back and forth of the waves lapping at their ankles, the wind gently swirling their hair, and them. On their little island, Gaius and she had something they would never have in Rome: Freedom and peace. There were no requests, no feasts, no worries and no annoying conversations. Here there was only nature, a few slaves and them as a family. Julius in particular flourished here under Gaius' undivided attention. Aurelia would love to freeze time and live forever in this moment with her family away from the duties and dangers of Rome.
Snapped out of her thoughts by a movement a few hundred yards ahead, Aurelia stopped in confusion and shaded her hand with her eyes. With horror she recognised a human figure heaving itself out of the surf with the last of its strength and collapsing powerlessly on the beach. Without hesitation, Aurelia ran. She quickly knelt down next to the figure and spoke to him. When he did not respond, she checked his vital signs and was relieved to find that he was still breathing. Carefully, she placed him in the recovery position and hyperextended his neck. Then she feverishly tried to remember the next steps. After all, she couldn't call 112. So, she sat down next to the man and kept checking his pulse and breathing. Fortunately, his airways were not blocked. At some point the man opened his eyes and stared at her with his mouth open.
"How are you? Are you in pain? Can you stand up?" she immediately asked with concern and the man's eyes widened even more. He looked down at himself in disbelief and then at her. Tentatively he assured her that he was not in pain. Then he stood up cautiously. As he swayed, Aurelia immediately jumped beside him and grabbed his arm. Together they made it back to the villa after what seemed like an eternity. Aurelia decided to take him to the kitchen. There the kitchen slaves were already busy preparing breakfast. Already from afar, a beguiling smell of fresh bread wafted over to them and awakened new strength in the stranded man.
In the kitchen she helped him onto one of the stools and asked the slaves to provide him with food. While a slave carried out her new order, she grabbed a stool of her own and sat down with the man, who already had a plate of cheese, bread and bacon in front of him.
"I didn't know the islands were inhabited," the man murmured, breaking off a piece of the fresh bread and shoving it into his mouth. Aurelia signalled to the kitchen slave, who shortly afterwards placed two cups of grape juice by them. Slowly the man ate and with each bite his face, tanned by the weather, relaxed more. Curious, she asked him questions about his life on the islands. The stranded man was called Numerius Faber Piscator and came from a family of fishermen who had lived on one of the neighbouring islands for generations. His stories were fascinating. When the last of the ham had been eaten, he leaned back on his stool and examined them closely.
"Thank you for your help, milady," the man said quietly, and was about to add something when the door was yanked open, and Julius rushed into the kitchen.
"I found her, father," Julius cried happily and immediately jumped onto Aurelia's lap. Smiling, she blew a kiss on his forehead, and then Gaius entered the room, pausing on the threshold when he noticed the fisherman.
"Good morning," Gaius greeted politely and stood behind Aurelia. "Did they come into the storm last night?"
The fisherman nodded, muttered something about his own stupidity and thanked him for his hospitality. Gaius merely made a throwing away gesture with his hand.
"Is there anything we can do to help you?" she inquired with a mild smile.
"But you have already done so much for me, Milady," the man immediately gushed, and Julius craned his neck so he could look her in the eye. Supporting him, she wrapped her arms around her son, making sure he didn't hit his head on the work surface.
"We're happy to help," Julius chirped gleefully, smiling brightly at the fisherman. The man's resistance melted away immediately.

"Do you think he recognised us?" asked Gaius, waving amiably at the receding boat. Nervously, she began to play with the coin Gaius had given her two years ago, which she wore around her neck after it had been fitted with a pendant. Apart from her wedding ring, she wore no other jewellery here on Dianium. Nor did anyone care if she wore the same dress for days on end or walked around without make-up.
"Of course, he did," Aurelia replied, feeling his body tense beside hers. "But he won't talk. We saved his life, Gaius"
"No," Gaius objected gently, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You saved his life. I probably would have freaked out and left him lying there"

Three weeks later, she stood at the galley's railing, looking longingly back at the ever-shrinking island that had given them a break from all the hustle and bustle for the last two months, to which they now had to return. For even if part of Aurelia would have preferred to stay on Dianium forever, the island could never be their home. There was plenty of work waiting for them in Rome. After Drusilla's death and the birth of her son, Aurelia's network had expanded within a few months - by now she was acquainted with every senator's wife and everyone whose husbands would shortly become senators. In this way, Gaius was able to support. True, it had taken another year for the last senator to realise that Gaius had neither interest in nor desire for a mistress. From then on, at the latest, the women redoubled their efforts to win Aurelia's favour.
Silently, Gaius stepped next to her, and his shoulder gently brushed her arm as he leaned over the railing. Out of the corner of her eye, she studied his face and spotted that strange sombre expression on it that she had observed on him time and again over the last few months. She sensed that something had been bothering him for a while and although she had an idea what it might be, she did not press him to tell her. When he was ready, Gaius would come to her and until then she would give him the time, he needed to work these things out with himself.
"One day we will return here," he promised softly, and she did not miss his uncertainty or the bitterness that lay in his words. In her first impulse she wanted to ask why they couldn't return next summer, but the deep sadness on his face held her back. Instead, she leaned over the railing beside him, rested her head on his shoulder and enjoyed the light breeze on her face. After a while, his body relaxed, and he began to hum almost silently a happy tune that reminded her vaguely of an Abba song. In her mind, Aurelia resolved for the hundredth time to stop singing in the shower. She hadn't even been aware of it until one day Gaius had stuck his head in the bathroom and asked her to finally teach him the language so that he could sing the lyrics of these catchy tunes correctly. It had surprised her how quickly he had learned English. At about the same time, Julius' eyes had started to change colour, Aurelia recalled with a melancholy smile.
At that moment, the small island disappeared into the horizon and Aurelia shook off her melancholy. As soon as they left the safety of their ship, they had to shine. Determined, she straightened up, turned and looked searchingly around the ship. Close to her, Julius sat on a wooden chair and thoughtfully observed the hustle and bustle of the sailors. When he caught her glance, he smiled brightly at her and beckoned her excitedly to him. At the same moment, Gaius grabbed her hand and pulled her with him to their son, who was watching them excitedly out of large, golden-brown eyes.

Due to the rain, most of the inhabitants of Rome stayed in their houses and missed their return. Nevertheless, every now and then Aurelia caught sight of a curious face peering into her palanquin. Sullenly, Julius looked out at the rain and shook his head sadly. Immediately Aurelia asked what was troubling her son.
"Titus won't be able to visit us tonight, will he?" the boy wanted to know, and Aurelia cast an appraising glance at the sky. Of course, she knew that not even the worst of storms could prevent one of her guests from coming to her guest paintings. Tonight, half the Senate would be dining with them.
"He will surely accompany your aunt Flavia tonight," Gaius replied and immediately Julius' face lit up with anticipation. For the past year, Vespasian had held the post of legate in one of the legions on the Rhine, which was why he had narrowly missed the birth of his son Titus. Flavia had quickly integrated herself into the group of her friends and when she came to visit Julia, Agrippina and Aurelia in the palace together with Clementina, she usually brought her son with her.
"I really must show Lucius and Titus my shells," the boy said excitedly, looking dreamily out into the rain. Aurelia gave Gaius an amused look. Although the three cousins had each been born a year apart, they were now inseparable. Lucius had taken an interest in Julius as soon as Julius could walk and Titus, Vespasian's son and the youngest of the three, had been part of the group since he could grab. They played together and Aurelia was glad that Julius could keep Agrippina's son in check with his calm manner. Nevertheless, Lucius always persuaded the two younger ones to go on little adventures, which Julius enthusiastically told his parents in the evening. Mostly they explored the palace or the garden.
When the palanquin came to a halt in front of her home, Gaius helped her out of it and the warmth of the rain on her skin surprised her. The next moment, the rain pattered gently on an umbrella Clemens held over her. Gratefully, she nodded to him and followed her two men into the palace without haste. In the atrium she was immediately taken in by Julia and Agrippina, who immediately told her about the latest gossip from Rome and Misenum, for that was where they had spent their summer with the rest of the family. Julius gesticulated wildly at Lucius, who listened attentively, while Gaius conferred with Clemens and Suetonius. It was good to be home again. While she attended to the final preparations for dinner, Gaius disappeared into his study, preparing in his own way for the unofficial first meeting of the Senate after the summer recess.

As Aurelia had already suspected, the members of her family and the senate did not let the rain stop them and all showed up without exception. It took hours to converse sufficiently with all the women before the actual meal could begin. Fortunately, Aurelia had gotten into the habit of having a snack before dinner, so her hunger didn't make her impatient and gruff.
Unnoticed, the children flitted through the guests and Julius' blond mop of hair kept appearing near them. Each time, Lucius' red hair and Titus' dark head were not far from her son. Out of the corner of her eye she watched her husband, who was as much in demand as a conversation partner among the men present as she was among their wives.

During the meal, Julius joined Gaius and her and listened to their conversations in turn. During the last course, Gaius tensed, and she looked at him questioningly. There was that dark shadow on his face again as he silenced his uncle with his eyes. Before Aurelia could make her presence known unobtrusively, Agrippina again demanded her undivided attention. Her unease grew.

After putting Julius to bed, she had her girls get her ready for the night. Now she had been lying in bed for half an hour, reading Gaius' edition of Catullus' poems. A light was on in his study. With a little groan, Aurelia folded the codex shut, got up and walked to her husband, who was still accompanied by his toga and poring over his documents with that sombre expression on his face.
"I'll finish in a moment," Gaius assured her without looking up and she just rolled her eyes. If she couldn't lure him away from his desk now, he would still be sitting there in the morning. Silently, she crossed her arms in front of her chest and stayed where she was. After a while, Gaius groaned in frustration and raised his head. The hurried expression in his eyes frightened her.
"My grandmother and uncle think I need a military victory," Gaius said and his words hit her like a punch to the pit of her stomach. A venomous voice in the back of her mind reminded her of the failed invasion of Britain and the ridiculous war against Neptune that Caligula was credited with. Gaius misinterpreted her expression, spread his arms and pulled her onto his lap. Instantly his warmth drove away her dark thoughts. Still, she silently prayed that he would assure her that he would not go to war.
"That's why I wanted to get as far away from all this as possible this summer," he confessed, burying his face against her neck. "I needed to think and figure out what I wanted. Unlike Julius, I grew up in a military camp. My father made a game out of the war for me, and now more and more voices are being raised demanding my own successes. Apparently, it is no longer enough for the people that I am the son of a great commander. According to Clemens, there are already three noble families who see my reluctance to go to war as an opportunity for them to demand our position at the head of the state. Ever since I was a little boy I have dreamed of Britain. If I could conquer Britain, our position would be unassailable"
Abruptly, Aurelia got up from his lap and stepped to the window. She was trembling with anger and fear. She had always deeply disliked war and its glorification. She deeply hated it when war was seen as a means to an end. But if history had taught her one thing, it was that people would always strive to dominate others. The size of the Roman Empire alone proved how much this striving for power and influence was anchored in this people and the striving for military glory in its elite. The economy functioned through slavery - was there even a sector in which slaves did not play a role? Even in politics, private secretaries were indispensable. As part of her studies, she had read somewhere that one cause of the collapse of the Roman Empire might have been the drying up of the supply of slaves through the lack of further conquests. But Britain was a bottomless pit. As far as she remembered, every Roman general had failed to conquer the island outright and even to conquer a large enough part would take years. But even if they ruled some parts of the island, the inhabitants would never allow themselves to be completely subjugated. Would they really be able to hold the conquered areas on the island?
Her gaze lingered on the rolling hills of the city slowly sinking into sleep and her troubled emotions gradually calmed. She was no longer in the twenty-first century, but in the first century AD. Her modern views and scruples would fizzle out here. Deep down, hadn't she always known that this day would come when she would have to choose between what was politically necessary and what was morally right? Why did she suddenly feel so lost?
Gently, his hand placed itself under her chin and forced her to look him in the eyes again. In them she could discover nothing but the fear that also threatened to rob her of the air she could breathe. Silently he wanted to know what was going through her mind.
"We are the first servants of Rome," she murmured. "If Rome wants to rule Britain, then we must conquer Britain for Rome."