"Heeeeyyyyyyy."

"..."

"Are you drunk?"

"Whatttt? Nooooo. I'm-I'm just...yeah a little bit."

"A little bit?"

"A lot."

"Why are you drunk?"

"From beer—drinking beer. Duhhhhhhh. Hey, you know what?"

"What?"

"No guess what."

"What?"

"Stop laughhhhiinnngg. It not funny."

"No it's pretty funny—"

"Why am I like this?"

"Like what?"

"I got...I got a perfect girly friend. She-She was perfect. And great and perfect. I even play sports. B-But then everything goes - wwwhhhoooppp - down hill. Grades go - kerplunk! Got kicked off the team for missing out on practice. And she dumps me for my best friend. Liikkkeee, how screwed up is that? And on top of alllllll things, my momma gets in a car wreck."

"Oh...I'm so sorry. Is she ok?"

"Yeahhhhh, yeah she's ok. She in the hospital."

"Well, whatever your name is—"

"August."

"You should really go to bed, August. Sleep it off."

"Y-You're right. I think you're righhhhtt."

"Yeah. Goodnight August."

"Wait!"

"What?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Forrr you know, talkin' to me. I don't really have no friends. Before that wrong number thingy, no one really ever talk to me. Don't know why. I'm pretty hot."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeahhh. Got them six packs *smack* and tan skin. Girls like that right?"

"Right."

"Ok ima go to bed now."

"Ok. Goodnight August."

"Night Audrey."