I held her hand as we walked up to my parent's house in Los Angeles. It was on a hill, stucco and tile. The yard was rock and cactus now, with two big palm trees that had always been there, and gated. It had to be gated--- wasn't when I was a kid.

            I had a key. I gave her an encouraging look, and she seemed relaxed, although we had not talked a whole lot on the trip down from Montana. I knew it was still on the tip of her tongue to tell me we could only ever be friends. I could see that was how she was going to get out of loving me--- I could feel it burning like a dang stupid jalapeno.

            Mom was in the entry way, obviously looking out the peep hole waiting for us. Her hair is this silver white blonde, she colors it that way. Short and spunky and cute. I opened the door and she was ready with the hug. Her hugs are big and last awhile, since she doesn't see me as often as she'd like.

            My mom is half Jewish and half German. My dad is a Jew--- all the way, orthodox Jew till his conversion to the church  just after my oldest brother was born. So we're a convert family. Well, not completely--- Mom isn't a convert in that sense, but she's the less active one now, so I would have to say convert family all the way. Except that my dad is the only one active. My older brother--- besides being gay was dead, my younger brother was openly gay, and my little sister was married to a dentist and had two great kids.

            "Mom, I want you to meet Aubrey. Aubrey this is my mom, Janice." Mom looked her over once very quickly, noted the lack of tattoos, height and piercings and gave her a warm welcome. Aubrey for her part was just as generous. I could count on that. I noted it before, the Mann kids were very congenial.

            My dad came hurrying from the other room. He'd had to have come home from the office to be here at this time of day. I saw movement behind him as well and noted that Chris (my sister) and her two kids, Melanie and Josh were standing in the hallway, waiting their turn. If Lance was here we were a go for a family reunion.

            "Dad!" I clapped him on the back. My dad is cool. He was wearing a white long sleeved  T, under a tan short sleeved T--- even in eighty degree weather. He was bald, but his eyes were dark and blue and beguiling. His jeans were comfortably baggie, and his physique was somewhat portly, not really, but only kind of fit.

            Aubrey didn't wait to be introduced. She extended her hand and looked him squarely in the eye, "Hello, Brother Stryker, it's so good to meet you."

            I saw my sister's eyes widen, her mouth drop open and her face turn a motley shade of pink. I glanced slightly at mom as well, not knowing if dad had told her, and found that he had not. She had that same drop dead shocked expression. I caught her eye and behind Aubrey's back, did the one finger sign for close your mouth and quip gaping.

            "Aubrey, Aubrey! Call me dad. Or Fred if you want. It's great to see you. Glad you could come." He pulled her in for a hug. He was shorter than me by a few inches, but a lot taller than Aubrey who was wearing flats, and so was shorter than all of us--except the kids. Mel and Josh took that moment to burst through the ranks and attack me. No surprise. They were apples in my eyes, at 10 and 12.

            Mom pulled us toward the living room, and kitchen area, having made lunch. I told her we had a short window, so she got right down to business. It was a lie--- I wanted Aubrey to meet the band tonight, but I also needed to spend some time with her alone.

            Chris was hanging back, so I went to her and crushed her in a huge embrace.

            "What the hell is she doing here?" My sister hissed as I hugged her. "She's not your type at all."

            "She's exactly my type. My new more realistic type."

            "Oh my God. What are you-- dying?"

            I laughed and hugged her again, and then let her go. I couldn't explain and didn't have to. Chris was fun and cute and dear and family, but she wasn't on my confidant list.

            The dining room table was not set, but I looked outside and the patio looked amazing, and was all ready for lunch, and the pool shimmered invitingly. My dad had his arm around Aubrey and was talking to her earnestly, which although I was ready for her to talk to him, I wanted to monitor it. And I didn't want it to be right now. It would make a good Skype call while I was on tour. I heard her giving her doctor titles and dad's approving noises.

            There was suddenly a lot of noise as my Uncle Aaron came in the front door behind us, dragging my cousin Jenny, and her three kids all dressed in swimming suits, and fighting for the door against Chris's husband Doug. Now--- slightly dismayed, I gave my mom and sister a look-- which they both caught with embarrassed smiles, and I shook my head slightly at their pushy matchmaking whatever this was.

            Aaron had grabbed my shoulder. He was not a member of the church--- none of the rest of them were, but a practicing Orthodox Jew. The brothers, although both raised the same, had agreed years ago to not judge. You could call them liberal Jews. They were both democrats.

            "Rafe, good to see you! I thought you'd be all loaded on the plane by now."

            "Bus tour, Uncle Aaron." I told him.

            "Oh, right, you tour all the way down there, don't ya? How many shows you doing?" I started telling him about the shows, wanting Aubrey to join me, I caught her eye as she tried to fill my dad in on her occupation and education, and didn't miss Chris sidling closer to hear it all as well. Right now, Aubrey was as un-industry as they came. She saw me jerk my head for her to come closer, and let her eyebrows quirk. It would be hard to get away from my dad--- starved as he was for any other member of the church contact--- and possible bride to be. This was killing me, so I rudely excused myself from Uncle Tim, pushed past Chris and descended on Aubrey--- cutting off her remarks as I told my dad this conversation would have to wait for another time.

            No one else was shocked, but Aubrey's face was priceless. She looked as if I'd slapped her. I was well known for a short fuse in my family--- and odd statements. No hard feelings. Everybody here knew me that way. But Aubrey hadn't seen this side of me in action. I hooked my fingers in her belt loop and rubbed her bare hip under the light weight top she wore. She effortlessly removed my hand completely and stepped away from me.

            It turned out she wasn't going to be shy in the family home, if I was going to be a jerk. But jerk-dom comes naturally for me, and rarely when I'm in it do I care to stop it.

            Fortunately my mom started bringing out the food. Aubrey went immediately and asked if she could help her, and like any good little Mormon girl, she was good at it, and anticipated my mother's needs without taking over. Since Chris was not good at it, and expected Mom to wait on her, she didn't go help. Which was also quite natural in our family.

            Mom had made fried chicken--- mashed potatoes and gravy, rolls, and coleslaw. She'd also made her famous fry bread, and honey. There was a relish tray, and a fruit salad--- this was So Cal, and these things were easily available. We sat down and Aubrey waited, like a good little Mormon girl, for my dad to call on someone to say the blessing. The kids jumped in the pool.

            She nodded as if to herself, and Uncle Tim did say something along the lines of a blessing, because that was Uncle Aaron--- and I saw Aubrey's lips move in benediction. Once again, all very normal. But I was seeing it from Aubrey's point of view.

            The food went by us in a blur, the conversation floated over me like the waves in the pool. My cousin Jenny cleaned up, asked if I wanted to play a game of water volleyball and when Aubrey agreed, Chris shepherded her in the direction of a bathing suit and changing room. I went to change.

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