"You are nothing but a failure," a woman shouted at the top of her lungs.

"I can't believe we wasted so many years and money on you who can't do anything right," a man beside synced with her, his voice was lacing the same venomous tone

"No wonder why they left you and now she too," she sneered and Clavicus flinched with his head still hunged low. Shame and pain were evident on his face. They still hadn't acknowledged my presence yet and I had no idea who they were nor I was sure about involving with whatever was happening here, didn't I have enough drama for today?

I thought I had done enough human helping. I was too tired and my headache was getting the best of me. So I had decided to ignore whatever the keeping up with the Kardashians shit that was going on and started to make my way to my room. But of course, someone had to interrupt me from getting some goddamn rest again.

"How dare you walk in like that in my son's house?!" That woman called me out angrily. Son? Wait, so she was Karen Mercer! Clavicus's mother and our ex-CEO, Mr. Theodore Mercer's wife. I sighed and turned around to find that bitch was glaring her eyes out at me. I rolled my eyes and questioned indifferently, "And you care because?"

She gazed at me from head to toe with a twisted face then glanced at Clavicus with a glare while Theodore remained nonchalant. I had taken a good look at this couple. Both Karen and her husband had blond hair and blue eyes. She had a thin figure and her husband was neither too fat nor thin. From afar, they together looked like a power couple but honestly, they looked more like a bunch of witches to me. I wouldn't have been surprised if I suddenly saw them flying with a broom one day.

"Clavicus how dare this fat cow talk back to me like this and what is she doing in your house?" Karen shrieked and I literally felt like my head bursting out, what was up with people screaming like a fucking hyena? Did they not care about their vocal cords nowadays? Clavicus was about to say something when I laughed at her cute insults, such an adorable toddler-minded attitude she had.

"What's your age again? A 5-year-old kid has better insults than you. If it wasn't for your botoxed face, I would have mistaken you for a toddler," I snorted and she gaped at me. Even her husband glared at me while his real-life Karen was fuming in sheer anger.

"Watch your language, you insolent girl. Remember who you are talking to." Theodore exclaimed viciously and I was about to reply when Clavicus spat out angrily while glaring at them,

"Father, I would appreciate it if you and mom will stop being rude to Lilith. She is my paying guest and my one of the best employee of my company. I don't want her to be dragged into all this. Your anger is for me, not her."

This was the first time he actually had made eye contact with his parents and spoke out during this whole time, looks like his CEO instincts couldn't be controlled for too long. Even his parents were staggered seeing his sudden change of behavior.

"So now you will talk back to your parents like this for your whore, huh?" Theodore yelled at Clavicus and he just sighed then tried to reason with him when Karen decided to make us acknowledge her foul mouth too.

"Actually you deserve fat whore like her only, you bloody son of a fucking beggar. No wonder why she left you," Karen smirked smugly at him and Clavicus looked like he would burst in anger anytime soon but controlled himself. Why was she cursing herself only? I knew she was dumb but never thought this leveled dumb. I had enough of this dumbass bitch. Honestly, her insults had got nothing on me, I just wanted to get some sleep but this screaming hyena wouldn't let me. So I had decided to end all of this family drama.

I stepped closer to Karen with a menacing smile while she backed away, her eyes blazing with loathing.

"Listen to me now sweetie, if I hear you scream one more time, I swear to the lord of coffee, you would not be able to open that filthy little mouth of yours again," I exclaimed threateningly while still smiling and she narrowed her eyes at me.

"And what will you do if I did, you fat whore huh?" She sneered and I chuckled while showing her my phone. She and her husband stared at it confusingly with a frown

"You see, I have recorded all of the drama of you and your husband. So if you don't want me to post it on social media and also call the police, getting your flatass arrested for verbally harassing me and Clavicus, then leave this fucking instance." This time I smirked smugly and she gasped. I knew she wouldn't have let me go easily the moment she called me out and opened her trashy mouth to me. So I had decided to sneakily record everything to get over with all this shit.

"How dare-" her screaming was interrupted by her husband grabbing her arm. He then leaned and muttered something in her ears which I was unable to listen to, nor I was interested. This dumbass bitches could only utter shit. I glanced at Clavicus and found him gazing at the wall mindlessly. Theodore cleared his throat and started to make his way towards the door, dragging his bratty wife with him. She looked at me one last time and mouthed "this is not over". I rolled my eyes and sighed after they finally left. I stopped the recording and turned around.

Clavicus already started to climb the stairs then paused in his steps and mumbled nonchalantly without looking back, "I could have handled it by myself. You didn't need to do all this."

"Yeah right, I just saw how you were handling everything, and don't worry, I didn't do any of this for you. I did it so that I could have some drama-free time," I scoffed and ran up the stairs, walking past him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had come out of the shower and wore my comfy pajamas. I laid down on the bed and sighed peacefully. I pulled the blanket over me and closed my eyes but at that same exact moment my stomach growled in hunger and I groaned, would I ever get to sleep?

I sighed in exasperation and got up to go downstairs. As I was walking towards the stairs, I had noticed the lights of Clavicus's room were still on. I shrugged it off and walked down the stairs.

I saw the pasta that the cook had made was still untouched which means Clavicus hadn't eaten yet, well more for me then! I had put some pasta on a plate and took out a beer bottle from the fridge. I remembered once Clavicus talking about how beautiful the balcony of the penthouse was. So I decided to have a dinner date with myself there, now that's self-love.

I had taken the food and made my way to the balcony. As I was walking there, I saw a silhouette of someone's back on the floor. I walked closer to the balcony and found Clavicus sitting on the railing with his shoulder slumped down, looking up at the sky.

I better run back before he sees me, or else I'll get myself involved in another therapy session. But as always, my luck had to show how much cursed it was. Before I could have gone back, Clavicus had already acknowledged my presence. He glanced at me momentarily before gazing back at the dazzling moon which was illuminating in the dark night, giving some life in the darkness.

People usually praised someone by calling them 'the ray of sunshine', referring that the person brings happiness into the lives of others. But I had found it absurd because even the sunshine could be harming when it was blazing too much. When on the other hand moonbeam was so harmless yet strong. It shines through the menacing dark black sky and tries its best to light up the surrounding of it. It reminded me of people who sometimes try their best to pull their loved one out of tenebrosity, no matter how much dark it was, it particularly reminded me of someone...

I sighed and contemplated whether I should go there or not. At last, I had decided to stay just to make sure he doesn't try to do something reckless because I didn't want to go to jail due to his stupidity.

I strode towards him with my pasta and beer. I had reluctantly sat on the railing beside him, then realized that the railing was wide enough to squeeze in my butt on it. So I kept the beer aside and started to eat shamelessly, not even sparing him a glance, what? Food was always my first priority.

Clavicus was quiet, still staring at the moon. Occasionally I would have heard him sniffing, though I still hadn't tried to start any conversation neither I wanted to, the pasta was too good for me to stop eating it. I took a sip of the beer when I felt Clavicus shifting slightly beside me.

"I am sorry on behalf of them. They shouldn't have dragged you all this. Fuck... I am such a failure, I couldn't even defend you properly," he apologized quietly and tugged his hair out of frustration. I rolled my eyes at him and chuckled lightly.

"Last time I checked, you weren't neither Karen nor Theodore Mercer. So stop apologizing for their mistakes and I am not a damsel in distress. I perfectly know how to defend myself. I don't need anyone else for that," I replied and he sighed, nodding his head. I perceived his eyes were puffy and red, just like that night on the terrace. It had felt like a Deja Vu.

"I know how much of a strong-headed person you are, Lilith. I wish I had strength and bravery like you." He muttered with a dolorous smile and I snorted at his statement. My expression turned nonchalant as I gulped down my beer.

"Bravery and strength don't come for free, Clavicus. You have to pay a substantial amount for it," I sneered coldly. How easily people thought that it was like a walk in the garden to gain the strength to stop caring about all this unnecessary shit. I wouldn't have called it strength, it was more of like losing the ability to feel something other than dead inside.

"I think I have paid and endured enough to gain it, Lilith, but I guess my luck is cursed. It's never satisfied with my torments, it keeps wanting more." He paused as his voice cracked slightly, tears rolled down his cheeks.

He had hastily wiped them off and cleared his throat then continued nonchalantly, "Still I am sorry for what they did and the things you had to saw."

I shrugged and slumped my shoulder like his then kept my plate aside as I had finished my pasta, now that was truly a sad ending.

"For fuck sakes stop letting their words affect you. You know what you are, so their words shouldn't matter. They're just shitty parents." I sighed in exasperation. Why was he so sad by his parents' words? He was one of the richest billionaires and his company was renowned worldwide. He had made the company famous more than anyone of his family member ever could have.

"They're not my biological parents," he confessed lugubriously and looked down while his tears started to fell freely.

"Well, I am not surprised hearing that," I sighed and took a sip of my beer. It was true, the way they were behaving with him, it was quite obvious. But then again, even real parents could be just as shitty to their own blood too and who could have known it better than me.

"Well their treatment towards me gives it all away, I guess." He smiled at me with agony and didn't even bother to wipe his tears this time. It was like he truly gave up on trying to put a facade of being strong. Then he looked away from me and stared outside mindlessly.

I too joined him and stared outside. We sat in silence for a long time. None of us had uttered a word. My beer was finished too, so I just dangled my legs while staring at nothing particular. The view from here was simply beautiful. It showed a classic city side with numerous large buildings side by side and the lights coming from there were illuminating like the stars in the sky. A cold breeze had hit my face softly and unconsciously my mind drifted to Orson.

I used to think that if I had ever met Orson again, there would have been coldness in his eyes and hatred in his gestures. Yet, today when I had looked into his eyes, it held the same warmth for me and his caring ways was just as lovable like it used to be. And it infuriated me, why does he have to be the way he was? I was brought back to reality by Clavicus.

"Can I vent out to you, please?" He pleaded quietly with a look of desperation and I internally groaned, when would he understand that I was an architect and not a therapist?

"Why would you want to vent out to the person who would barely care about the stuff you have to say?" I scoffed and glanced at him. He had stopped crying but his cheeks were still stained with tears.

"That's the reason. You don't care enough to be pitiful towards me and that's what I want," he murmured and I sighed in defeat, I should have become a therapist.

"This is the last time I am gonna be kind but don't expect any type of consoling from. You don't pay me enough for that." I retorted and he chuckled slightly, shaking his head. He then cleared his throat and gazed up at the moon while he reminisced his past to me

"My real parents used to work as servants under Mr. Theodore Mercer's father, the late Robin Mercer. He was quite a lonely guy as his wife had passed away years ago due to some accident. But still, the old man was really kind and down to earth, unlike his snobbish son who never even had lifted a finger to do any work. Robin was really fond of my parents and they literally worshipped him. Actually, my parents were refugees from Mexico and Robin had given them shelter." Oh, so he was Mexican.

"I never thought you would be Mexican. I always thought of you as a white spoiled brat" I snorted.

Clavicus chuckled then continued, "He loved me dearly. He always considered my mama, papa and me as his family. Theodore was an only child and barely cared or visited his father, especially after marrying Karen."

I rolled my eyes at the mention of her name. He just shook his head with a smile at my expression.

"My childhood was going just fine but soon it got jeopardized." He shuddered at the thought and I had hesitantly patted his shoulder. He smiled softly at my awkward way of comforting. I never was good at comforting. I always hated ranting and also listening to them too. I just had never felt sympathetic for people easily and even if I did, it was very little.

"I clearly remembered that day. It was my 7th birthday and Robin wanted us to celebrate it with him. He knew I never liked parties, so he just arranged some decorations and food, along with a huge batman cake as it was my favorite superhero. I was so giddy that day and my parents were crying tears of joy but as we were about to cut the cake, we abruptly heard gunshots. I remembered being terrified of the sounds and clinging tightly to my mama. She quickly pushed me to hide somewhere and told me to call the police. I ran as fast as I could but paused for a bit to look at my mama. She smiled at me as brightly as she could to reassure me that she would be safe. Only if I knew." A tear slipped down his eyes as he stared out with an anguished expression while I kept looking at him with a frown, feeling myself getting slightly curious about what would have happened next.

"I had quickly called the police and gave them the address. Then I had hidden behind the kitchen door and saw that a bunch of robbers had broken into the house. I remembered shaking at the sight in front of me. They were beating my mama and papa mercilessly as they were trying to protect Robin. Soon the beating got so ruthless that I couldn't help but whimper seeing my family slowly losing their lives. Unfortunately, they had heard me and a man ran to find me, my mother begged them to stop while they laid over Robin who had become unconscious to protect him from more beating. Before they could catch me, the police arrived but the damage was already done... My parents died in front of my own eyes," he had choked out a sob and punched the railing while I was awkwardly spinning my bottle, what was I supposed to say? For me, that sight would have been nothing but pure bliss. Then again, not everyone's demons were their birth giver.

"What happened next?" I curiously inquired and he continued while wiping his tears.

"Robin's condition was crucial but he was able to survive. It turned out those bloody bastards weren't robbers but an ex-employee of Robin and their friends. They wanted to take revenge because Robin had fired the guy for his recklessness. Though I was completely broken at my parent's death, I knew they died with pride as they were able to save the person they devoted themselves to. So it helped ease my pain. Theodore and Karen didn't even bother to visit him because apparently, they were busy with a business trip." He chuckled sardonically.

"After a few months, Robin's health got better and doctors had discharged him. I always had clung to his side throughout the whole time. But then Robin did the worst thing in my life with a good intention." He paused and clenched his jaw before mumbling.

"Later when Theodore and Karen finally came to visit him, they revealed that Karen was infertile. Then Robin thought it would be great to force a couple who were racist bitches to adopt me." He snorted and I had facepalmed myself. No offense to that old guy but it had appeared that he had lost his few brain cells due to the accident.

"Racist, you say? Looks like Karen had managed to live up to her name," I scoffed and he chuckled, nodding his head.

"Oh, you have no matter idea. Karen absolutely hated anyone who wasn't white. She acted around them like they were some contagious disease. At first, they had completely refused to adopt me. Then Robin threatened them saying that he will cut them off from the will if they don't. They begrudgingly had to adopt me and then started the hell of my life. Karen and Theodore never missed a chance to taunt. They never loved me. They didn't even let me go outside. I was homeschooled because apparently, they felt ashamed to address me as their son in public. They went as far as to even made me go through laser skin whitening treatment to make my skin stone lighter. For fuck sakes I was just a little kid at that time." He sighed frustratingly and rubbed his face.

"Then why didn't you told all of this to Robin?" I frowned confusingly and he had let out a satirical laugh

"They manipulated and threatened me not to tell any of it to him. They even had made me believe that what they were doing was right and that I was really worthless. Things got worse when Robin passed away when I was 13 years old. After his death, when the lawyer had come to read out Robin's will, in there it was stated that 70% of his property and the company would be completely mine and 30% would be Theodore's. They were furious after hearing that and almost wanted to murder me. But controlled themselves. And if before they were furious, after the next what they had heard, made them burst in sheer rage. There it was stated that if something happens to me or I die, then the whole property would be given to some charity. I didn't even care about the property. I had lost the only person left who genuinely loved me."

His eyes yet again became teary as he had reminisced about Robin.

I had given him a tissue while muttering awkwardly, "Umm... Your nosey is coming out, wipe it out or else it might fall on the railing, and what if I accidentally keep my hands on it?" I had grimaced at the thought of it and Clavicus had looked at me with a dumbfounded expression for a minute before bursting into laughter.

"Here I am telling you about my sad childhood and you are concerned about my nosey? Damn... Lilith, you never fail to amaze me." He chuckled and took the napkin, wiping his tears first then his nose.

"You seriously can't expect me to sympathize it. If anything, you should expect me to respect you for going through so much pain yet manage to be so strong," I rolled my eyes at him.

I didn't understand why people felt pity or sympathetic for people who go through pain. Shouldn't we rather admire and respect them for going through so much pain and still facing the fucked up world head-on? People usually say 'oh I am so sorry you had to go through that'. Why were you sorry bitch? You should rather say 'you fucking have a nerve of steel and I am proud of you for surviving it'. He sighed then smiled at me.

"I am not strong Lilith, rather I am anything but strong. After the death of Robin, Theodore and Karen's verbal abuse became worse than ever and I didn't even know how to stand up for myself. I was still depressed because of losing all of my family. I tried to commit suicide 4 times throughout my teenage life. But they somehow managed to save me every time. Yet they never bothered to get me a psychiatrist nor considered to behave nicely just once. They rather used to mock about my mental health. They used to thought I did all this for attention and they made sure my suicidal tendencies are remained undiscovered from the world, they even used to pay doctors huge amounts for keeping it a secret. Things got better for me once I got into university, far away from them." He paused and sighed. He then continued with a dolorous smile.

"Remember the time you saw me in the office terrace, trying to jump off the building?" He asked and I nodded.

"Well, my luck was yet again jeopardized. After I had taken over the company, Theodore and Karen had completely cut off ties with me. But suddenly a few months ago, they came over to my house and announced to me that they have betrothed me to one of their friend's daughters, Emily Vincent in exchange for 500 million dollars and a merge with their company. At first, I refused but soon they had emotionally blackmailed me and I had finally given in. When I first met Emily, I was smitten by her. She was surely a very sweet and beautiful girl. I thought that maybe finally I will have someone to love and fix me. I even took off some time from work, remember? Well, everything was just going fine and for the first time, I felt happy in such a long time. But as we already know-"

"Your luck is cursed!" I had completed his sentence and rolled my eyes while he chuckled, nodding his head.

"You are absolutely right, Ms. Valentine. On our wedding day, Emily got to know that I was adopted and the son of their servants. Turns out she was Karen's clone and didn't like the sound of it. She didn't even bother to come to the aisle, she simply had dumped me over text. Thankfully she and her family didn't tell anyone else about my truth. Though I was embarrassed and hurt. My parents weren't actually at the wedding. They were yet again busy in some business. So I got saved from their shouting for that time. I remembered being completely devastated. I never had gotten into any relationship. So this felt like heartbreak or worse. After many years, I again felt worthless and wanted to just kill myself. My suicidal tendencies, depression and inferiority complex came rushing back to me, drowning me in their caliginous ocean again. And after that, I tried to commit suicide again. I was so done with feeling worthless, empty and unloved. I hated how some people were quick to hate me because of my nationality, my color, my late DEAD parents occupation. I hated all of it." He muttered in a vanquish tone and sighed.

I cleared my throat and carefully got down from the railing, not knowing what to say to him at that time. I could felt his gaze on me as I kept the plate and beer bottle on the table which was situated in the middle of the balcony, who knew my date night with myself would turn into a bedtime story.

I turned around and found him staring at me like a little lost kid, making me rolled my eyes at him.

"Don't expect me to have sex with you right now to make you happy. I am not a cliche movie's female protagonist who would fix you and give you therapy sessions by having sex with you," I remarked and leaned against the railing, staring out. He chuckled and shook his head, which he seemed to do a lot around me.

"Damn... And here I thought my tragic stories would melt you away." He joked to which I had given him a blank expression and he chuckled louder.

"Can I at least have a friendship?" He requested and held out his hand. I glanced at it then at him and rolled my eyes at him

"Nice try but no, your tragic story got nothing on me," I retorted and he smiled, nodding my head

"I should have known," he chuckled and I yawned loudly. I could have felt my bed screaming to me to come to them, oh my sweet baby, I am coming soon.

"Anyway, I am done with kindness for today, so I am going to bed," I muttered sleepily and rubbed my eyes. He nodded while mumbling

"Yeah, it's quite late now. You should go to sleep," I yawned again, covering my mouth while turning around to leave.

"Listen, Clavicus, we humans aren't made of glass. We are made of soil and soil can't be broken. It can be scattered but once you press them together, they would be joined together again. You don't need to wait for someone to fix or love you. You don't even need a fix. You are perfect the way you are. Your scars don't need to be hidden. Just because you have suicidal tendencies, doesn't mean you are weak or worthless. It means that the world is just a fucked up place." I sighed and Clavicus became completely quiet, looking again at the moon.

As he didn't respond, I took that as my cue and made my way outside when I heard Clavicus muttered a thank you. I turned around and smiled at him.

"And try not to die while I am here. I don't wanna go to jail because of you. The coffee in the jail isn't good and I like my coffee rich," I replied and Clavicus chuckled loudly, showing me a thumbs up.

I entered my room and quickly jumped on the bed then I sighed in relief.

"Ughhhhh I am finally in the arms of my baby," I muttered to my loving bed when I suddenly heard a notification from my phone and I groaned in annoyance. I opened my phone and saw I got a message from an unknown number. I frowned confusingly while opening the text

"I know you don't want me around and now I will neither bother you anymore. I am just glad that you are safe and I am really proud of you and happy to see you were able to follow your dreams. Also, if you can, please contact Lilac for once. He still yearns for you... Just like me. I guess this is our proper goodbye and I promise I would not cross my paths with you again. Best of luck for your life ahead, Lilith. Goodbye.

- Orson"

By the time I finished reading it, my vision was blurry by my tears. Lilac still remembered me? Did he still miss me like I do? Was he able to follow his passion of becoming a doctor? Did he have a girlfriend now? So many questions were flooding in my mind and I desperately wanted to ask them but I knew I couldn't afford to talk to Orson again.

A sob broke down in my throat as memories of Lilac came back rushing to me. I quickly ran to my closet and opened the drawer inside it, taking out those bitter pills and popped two of them inside my mouth then swallowed them with some water. I continued to cry loudly and threw my phone in anger against the wall. After some time I could feel the medicine working as I slowly stopped feeling the heaviness in my chest and urge to cry. I sighed and went to the washroom. I opened the tapped and splashed some water on my face. I looked up at the mirror with a nonchalant expression.

"This is how you have to stay. You can't let those foolish feelings rush back to you again. Feelings, tears and happiness are for stupid people. You, my darling, are a strong ass bitch! And I won't let them come back to you ever again," I muttered to myself coldly and smirked at the mirror as I had felt my favorite thing coming back to me... numbness.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:
5199 words count. I can't feel my fingers at this point 😭😭 I tried my best to make this chapter as deep and dark as I could but I know it's never the best😭😭😭 also do you guys know that originally Lilith's name was supposed to be Alvia?😆😆 Then when I unpublished my very first book, I decided to keep her name Lilith!! Anyways I hope you guys liked it!!

Love you all🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤