"No."

"What? Why not?" Lilith asked.

Negan huffed, "Because it's not your responsibility."

"There are many things I do around here that aren't my responsibility, or at least shouldn't be. Be serious."

"I am being serious, honey!"

"It's just Hilltop! Come on, I need a fucking break from this place, from—"

"What, from me?" Her dad cut her off.

Scoffing, she responded, "Yeah, actually, from you. Please. Let me go. You know it takes only a few hours, I just need some god damn fresh air."

Lilith had been feeling as if she was suffocating ever since that day at the furnace. She couldn't tell if her dad was changing, or if she herself was changing, or something in between. But she just knew it was overwhelming. When her dad ordered Simon to go to Hilltop and fetch the other Dr Carson, Lilith saw an opportunity. A chance to leave, even for a little while, and think.

He was hesitant, but Negan eventually gave in, "Fine, Lili, fine, I'll tell Simon to make room for you."

"Uh- Or! Or I could just take his job for today, you can kick him out," Lilith offered.

"No, Lilith, this is compromise. I don't know why you're so damn desperate to leave, but at least this way I know you're coming back."

She almost laughed, "Right, cause you'd be so devastated if I left for good."

Negan's head snapped toward her, "The hell, sweetheart! You're my daughter, of course I'd be devastated! What is going on with you?"

Only rolling her eyes, she turned to leave, making her way outside. When she got there, Simon leaned against the truck. He waved his walkie-talkie at her, "Big man just told me! Welcome aboard, little princess!"

Lilith grimaced, "Don't fucking call me that."

The man smirked creepily as she climbed into the passengers side, "Whatever you say, doll."

He sat in the drivers seat and the peeled away. Lilith pushed herself against the door, trying to create as much distance between her and Simon as possible. She stared out the window, refusing to even glance in his direction or acknowledge him until the arrived.

————

Pulling through the large gate, Lilith finally realized how much she missed this place. Hilltop had always been her favorite of the communities. And though their leader was a prick, it was also home to some pretty decent people.

She opened the door and jumped out, tightening her ponytail as she walked towards the house. All the saviors stood in the main room when Gregory appeared. Lilith leaned her back against the door.

"Simon! Good to see you!" He exclaimed.

"Right back at you Gregory!" Simon responded.

The Hilltop leader invited him to have a drink with him, becoming nervous when he was rejected. It was then that he noticed Lilith in the back.

"Oh- hello."

"Hi there," she smirked.

"Um... what can I do for you?" He asked, directing his question to both her and Simon.

"Wonderful question!" The savior man cheered.

"Yes, wonderful question. One which I'm not needed to answer, so now that I've greeted our gracious host, I'll leave you to it," Lilith said before turning to go back outside.

Walking down the steps of the large estate, she basked in the sunlight. Somehow, the air felt cleaner here. Lilith examined everything around her until a familiar voice broke her focus.

"Oh god, not you again."

She stayed planted in her spot as he approached, "Well shit, if I had known my presence would upset you this much I would've stayed behind!"

"Would you have? Thank you."

"My pleasure, prick."

They looked at each other with hard stares, as if both waiting for the other to break. Lilith lost that fight, a smirk appearing on her lips. She stepped forward to hug him.

"Hey Paul."

The young man hugged her back tightly, cringing at the name, "You're still the only one to call me that."

"What? It's your name!" Lilith laughed, pulling away. They walked side by side, hands in their pockets.

"Yeah, and I hate it."

"Hey, it's better than sharing a name with a literal demon. Have some perspective," She teased.

"Mm, pass."

"Fine! I'll call you by your preferred name."

"Thank you," Jesus said gratefully.

"No problem, My Lord and Savior Jesus Christ."The man tried to smack the back of Lilith's head as she ducked unsuccessfully. "What?! That's what you like to be called!" She exclaimed, laughing happily.

They continued to walk, "So really, what're you doing here?"

"Can't I just come visit my favorite person?" She nudged his arm.

"Lil, this is the first time I've seen, let alone heard from you in months. Plus, with everything that's happened recently—"

"Woah— Everything that's happened?" Lilith cut him off, "Paul, what do you mean?"

He sighed, "I just mean everything with that new community your old man targeted."

"How do you know about that?"

"I—" Another sigh. "Enid told me. She's this girl who used to live in Alexandria and—"

"Yeah, I know who she is," Lilith told him, "She's here, huh?" Jesus nodded. "Anyone else here?"

"No," He replied, not convincingly at all.

"Paul, I've known you for a while, I like to think we know each other pretty well. Also, I know more about the situation than you think. All this to say, don't bullshit me. I know when your lying, and right now, you are."

Jesus didn't say anything.

"I'm gonna ask you this once. You can choose not to answer but you and I both know that not answering is still answering. Is Maggie here?"

Then, Jesus's expression turned from caution to confusion, "What?"

"The pregnant lady whose husband died in the lineup. Is she here?"

"How do you—"

"Know she's alive? Carl—kid with one eye—slipped up. He's an idiot but I kinda admire the guy."

"Lilith, listen—"

"Relax, Pauly. I'm not gonna do anything. I'm just... curious, I guess."

He slowly nodded, "Okay, well. Congratulations, you successfully changed the subject. I'm gonna go inside to see what's actually going on. Please don't-"

"Don't even worry. I am minding my own business. No snooping for me."

"Okay... see you."

Lilith sent him a small two-fingered salute as he walked away. Her smile dropping as soon as he turned around. She lied. Lilith was about to do the most snooping she'd done in a while.

Darting towards the trailers, she subtly peaked into all the windows, occasionally resting her ear against them to listen. She went around the entire camp doing this until she laid eyes on something quite interesting.

A pair of splintering cellar doors on the back of the large brick building. Lilith had never paid close enough attention to notice them, but they'd obviously been there a while based on the state of them.

Walking closer, she hovered over them thoughtfully. She then gently kicked them with her foot. After hearing nothing, she gently pulled the handle, finding it locked. Its resistance to opening took her off guard, and she pulled harder out of curiosity.

"Hi!" A voice called out to Lilith, startling her.

The blonde girl turned to see whom was speaking to her, becoming pleasantly surprised. It was Enid. Though she was confused as to why the brunette girl seemed happy to see her, she decided to run with it.

Enid held a large wicker basket of vegetables, her hands fidgeting nervously on the handles, "I have fresh produce! There's squash and zucchini here, but also lots of tomatoes in the shed if—"

"Enid! I'm not here to take your food," Lilith interrupted with a laugh.

"Well... still, I want to offer... um," the brunette's eyes flickered between the basement doors and Lilith.

Of course. She wasn't happy to see Lilith, she was desperate to draw her away.

"You're a horrible liar," the blonde told her. "Why is it locked?"

Enid said nothing.

"Are you hiding something in there? Something you shouldn't have?"

Nothing.

"Someone?"

Nothing.

Sighing, Lilith averted her attention back to the doors, "Fine, don't tell me. I'll figure it out on my own."

Panicked, Enid went to block her, "Wait!"

In doing so, she dropped the basket and vegetables tumbled everywhere. Bending down to start picking them up. Lilith hesitated, watching awkwardly. After a few short moments, the blonde bent down also to help the girl.

They had almost finished picking everything up when Lilith noticed something sticking out from under Enid's shirt. Looking closer, she recognized it as a knife. She paused upon realizing this.

The brunette looked confused at first until she followed the savior girl's gaze. Then Enid froze. She breathed heavier as she debated ways out of the situation.

"You're not supposed to have that," Lilith told her.

In a moment of adrenaline, Enid placed her hand on the hilt of the hunting knife.

Lilith's eyes widened when she saw this and reached out, grabbing the girl's wrist. "Woah! Hey!" She called out.

The moment was awkwardly long as the blonde's cold fingers wrapped around Enid's wrist. They looked at each other equally fearful. After feeling like the tension had gotten to much, Lilith snatched her hand back, clearing her throat. Enid still said nothing. They both stayed kneeling on the dirt.

Lilith thought for a moment, cursing to herself before speaking up, "Keep it."

Enid's eyes narrowed, "What?"

"Keep it," she repeated, "We're young, we're women. Self-defense is something we should never take for granted."

"Oh... thank you."

Lilith nodded, standing up and brushing off her knees. Enid followed suit, her hands returning to their fidgeting of the handles. More awkward silence passed between them.

Deciding to ignore her curiosities for the sake of Enid's sanity, Lilith sighed. She turned to walk away, but not before taking the basket from her and saying, "If you don't want me to know what's down there," she nodded towards the basement, "I won't look. I promise. Though I will say, I've got a pretty good idea. And if I'm right... just be careful. My dads even more temperamental than usual. If he were to find out... just be careful." Then she left Enid standing there.

The brunette watched Lilith walk away with confusion. She'd never seen the blonde girl act that sincere or speak that gently. It was as if this was a completely different person. She shook her head as if shaking the thought away. Lilith was Lilith. Saviors were saviors. They weren't redeemable.

The savior girl set the basket the in back of the truck. Her hands gripping the edge of vehicle as she leaned against it, exhaling. Jesus watched from his seat on the house steps.

He debated going up to her when Simon appeared with Hilltop's doctor. The one the Saviors were about to steal. The group of men loaded into the truck and Lilith sat in the very back on the edge, her leg dangling off as they drove away. The wicker basket in her lap as she stared off into space.

Then the saviors were gone.

Jesus continued to watch as the gates closed, Enid slowly approaching him before stopping beside him. She stared where he did. "I didn't know you were friends with her," she told him.

The man sighed, "It's hard to explain. Long story short, she's not her dad, deep down. I'm just trying to give her the space to realize that."

His words put Enid's experience into perspective. Going back and forth between two different environments must be overwhelming, no wonder Lilith felt like she had so many different personalities.

The brunette went back to her trailer to think, for she had a lot to think about. For starters, did she want to join Jesus in his attempt to free Lilith from her mental prison, or did she want to stay where she felt comfortable—hating the savior.

A decision she had no idea how to make.

————
(word count: 1905)