Every time I fell asleep in Mi's bed I would wake up in the middle of the night alone. The bed was always made on his side since he couldn't sleep, and he was nowhere to be found. So, I would leave before the sun rose and we wouldn't talk again until school, when we were forced to.

That weekend though, that wasn't the case. It would be a lie to say that my heart didn't warm when I saw my phone screen illuminate with his name as sound poured from the speakers. He was calling me for what seemed like no reason. I should have known that was too good to be true. Miles always needed something from me.

"Hey." I smiled, but it soon faded at the noises that sounded from the other end. It was wheezing and grunting, like he was struggling to breathe. I was already bolting to the front door by the time he made out a coherent noise.

"Where are you, Miles?" He didn't answer instantly and I felt my blood boiling as I slipped on my shoes.

"Where are you?"

He rattled off the name of some school and I dashed out the door before my parents could ask where I was going so late at night. I would deal with the consequences later. I couldn't take the car, which forced me to wait at the bus stop for half a life time because out here the bus service was so irregular it verged on nonexistent. It was one of the longest bus rides of my life. I kept calling Miles every other minute but there was never an answer, just endless ringing since he didn't even have a voicemail.

I barely waited for the bus to stop before I was pushing on the door. I could see him already- sat up against the wall with his head lolling to one side. He just looked like he had gotten high and passed out. I broke out into a run towards him.

"Mi?" I asked, lifting his head in my hands and his eyes flickered. One of his cheeks was swollen to match his black eye and bruised temple. He'd be lucky if he didn't get vertigo; it had happened before once when his mother slapped him.

"Mi?" I titled his chin and he grunted a little as he used his hand to push me away.

"I'm fine," he growled as he tried to push himself up using the brick wall.

"Yeah, clearly," I muttered as I slipped one of his arms over my shoulders to help him to his feet.

"Fuck off, Bailey."

Miles had two possible personas after an altercation with his mother:

1-A lost, insecure boy that needed affection.

2-Fuck everyone in the world, he only needed himself.

Clearly today was the latter. And of course, afterwards he would go out looking for a fight as if to prove to himself he was strong. That obviously had worked out for him.

I pulled my cellphone out of my pocket and dialed Lake's number. I knew he lived around here and maybe if I could just get this asshole to his house it would be enough. I wasn't strong enough mentally or physically to be dragging him halfway across town back to his shitty ass house with his manipulative mother. Every time I left him there I felt as though I was somehow betraying him.

Lake answered on the second ring, his voice tired and distant. "Hello?"

"Hey, Lake. We kind of need your help," I said as Mi tried to pull away from me for the umpteenth time, only to get a few feet away before realizing he needed me. There was some fumbling and then his voice became clearer.

"What is it?" I looked at the stupid fuckhead next to me and sighed. He was nearly knocking me over with his weight. I'd be the first to admit I was a bit small for a guy- not necessarily height wise though also that, but you would never find me at the gym or jogging.

"Mi got into a fight; he's not looking so good," I huffed as I practically dragged him down Lake's street despite the fact he hadn't agree yet. I really didn't have anywhere else to take him. "We're only a bit from your place, is it okay if I bring him there?"

Lake agreed reluctantly and we ended the call. I continued to drag Miles down the dimly lit street until Lake ran out to meet me, slipping Mi's other arm over his shoulders. It was probably hilarious to any onlooker- two small guys lugging a half conscious guy that was significantly larger than them down the street.

"What happened?" Lake whispered to me as if Mi might hear and decide to fight with him as well.

"Picked a fight with someone he couldn't win against and got the shit beat out of him."

After a few minutes of sitting next to Mi- who was passed out on Lake's bed- I knew it couldn't take it any longer. I felt so useless. I had to call Beatle and explain and hope that maybe he could come take care of Miles because I couldn't do it. Seeing him like this caused me pain because somehow I would find a way to blame myself for all of it. Once Beatle got there I took his car back to my house.

My parents didn't ask what had happened when I walked in. Maybe they trusted me or maybe they had seen the look on my face when I walked in.

As soon as I woke up the next morning I sent a text to Miles, knowing full well that he wouldn't get it till he woke up but hoping that he would reply.

Call me. I'm worried about you.

Delivered

I barely put any effort into my appearance that morning. Because what did it matter? Miles wasn't going to be there and I couldn't have cared less about what anyone else thought of me.

I walked down the hall to Gemma's room and knocked on the door before opening it- something she could yell at me endlessly for. She didn't see the point in me knocking if I was just going to open the door right after. She had lip gloss in her hand and she was staring into the mirror mounted on her wall.

"Want a ride? I have Beatle's car." She looked at me instantly and her eyebrows perked up.

"Beatle? Like really hot Beatle?" She immediately put her lip gloss down and turned all her attention to me. I rolled my eyes.

"How many guys do you know named Beatle?"

"Can you make some sort of deal that he can only get the car back if he marries me?"

"Gemma, you're incredibly desperate and sad."

"I prefer thirsty, but thanks. Not my fault you have attractive friends. Literally the only good thing about having an older brother. And hey, better your friends than Ryder's." That was very much true; I would much prefer her with my friends than 20-something-year-olds.

"Do you want a ride or not?" She nodded vigorously and grabbed her purse-like backpack from the corner of her room. And of course, to complete her outfit- a green romper with floral designs- she grabbed her Converse. They were so worn that on the sides the fabric was tearing from the rubber, but every time I tried to buy her a new pair or even suggested she wear different shoes she would start yelling at me about how she liked them better that way.

She blared obnoxious country music the whole drive to school and sang the wrong words. I drove more careful than usually despite the fact Beatle had already put a fair number of bumps and scratches in his car.

I was late for first period, mostly because I just didn't want to go and distracting myself with my phone was all too easy. I had barely walked into my Psychology class when the principal buzzed the class for me. By this point, I practically knew what was going to happen. You develop a sense of when things are wrong, and typically when you're dealing drugs and all the other people you deal drugs with get called down to the office as well it's safe to say you're in shit.

It was my second suspension, not that it even mattered anymore. Beatle decided to try and aggravate Mr. Keefe as much as possible, then jumped to Lake's defense. I didn't know why he felt so strongly about protecting him but it wasn't my place to ask. Mr. Keefe wasn't buying it though, and asked for us all to leave while he talked to him.

"Who do you think told?" Trick asked, leaning against one of the walls to the office. It was all windows so everyone could see inside. I thought that was a pretty fucking stupid idea. Like, if there's an emergency and someone gets injured everyone will be able to see and that will draw a crowd and then shit spread around school like crazy- it's like they're asking for gossip.

"Probably Spencer." Beatle shrugged but the name meant nothing to me.

"What are you planning with the kid?" Trick asked and Beatle rolled his eyes as he toyed with a box of what I knew was cigarettes in his pockets.

"He's not a kid." Beatle rolled his eyes and Trick waved him off.

"You know what I mean. We don't need help, we're doing fine."

"It can't hurt."

"That's bullshit and you know it." I think I was more shocked than they were when those words rolled of my tongue. I was always a generally blunt person, but I felt that I may have taken it too far. The truth was though that I didn't see the need for anyone else to ruin their future over drugs. It's not like anyone really needed the money, it was more that they were just bored with their lame ass lives. Yet, here I was.

The door to Mr. Keefe's office opened and we went silent. Everything after that was clockwork. Beatle gave his speech about being more careful, I took Ryder's ID into the local liquor store and picked up some booze, and we went to our nearby drinking place- the wooded area behind the park.

Trick started to talk about Becky, a girl we had both had a thing with, but I was too busy staring at my phone to care about what was happening. Every minute that went by without a text from Mi I took another sip of liquor.

I broke into the conversation. "I'm worried about Mi, he isn't texting me back. Do you think he's okay?"

"He's fine," Trick insisted, but it wasn't comforting in the slightest.

"I have some fireworks in the car, want to light them?" Beatle's idea was almost as bad as that time he decided we should go drunk skating, but I found myself nodding anyways. Anything to distract me.

By this point I was buzzed, maybe borderline drunk since I didn't even notice Beatle was holding the firework upside down until he had lit it and it was barrelling towards Lake.

"Are you okay?" Beatle asked as Lake stared at him with wild, angry eyes.

"I just got hit with a bloody firework. What the hell do you think?"

Beatle disappeared shortly after that to take Lake home. I was surprised Lake even agreed to get into a car with someone so drunk he hit him with a firework, but he did. It left me and Trick sitting there alone in silence as I refreshed my phone every five seconds.

"Do you think I could get Eloisa, dude? I don't know. I think she's out of my league," Trick sighed. I briefly looked up from my phone and considered telling him that a perfect, smart girl like that would want some ambitionless drug dealer, but stopped myself.

"She's so far out of your league you're playing different sports."

"Nice man. Way to stroke my ego."

"You do enough of that for all of us," I muttered, but he chose not to comment on it. Instead he pulled out a blunt and lit it, making the air around us smell like something had died.

"What about Jade?"

"Not going to happen," I sang while he looked at me inquisitively.

"Why? Because you had her first? You get all the girls, I fucking swear."

"It's the hair," I said with a meek smile and a shrug. He laughed and exhaled smoke between us. I blinked a few times at my message-less phone screen before wiping my hands on my thighs impatiently.

"Lake said Mi left his house in the morning right?"

"Yeah, why?" Trick raised a bottle of alcohol to his lips in between drags and I stood up, dusting my pants of any dirt.

"I'm going to go by his house and check on him."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Not at all."

And I was right; it really wasn't.