63 Michelle

If they suspect me, they didn't interview me yesterday.

I think I'm home clear as far as this Ben thing goes. I keep shooting him dirty looks, but that's just because he is sending them first. If he was gonna squeal like the rotten pig he is, he'd have done so already.

"You can't keep avoiding me, we work together." Gally pipes up from next to me.

I hate this. Like, he doesn't get that he was a means to an end. Why does everyone feel the need to talk about klunk that is dead and gone? I kissed Gally, because shuck David for thinking he can control me. Then again, shuck Gally for thinking that now we have some sort of thing going on.

"I'm not, shuck," I mutter, cracking my knuckles. Only like, what, an hour left of this and then I don't have to be here anymore?

"Someone could've shucking seen us." He asks, incredulous. "David was right there. What were you thinking?"

Do people idly think? He's being so fussy and prissy. Does he want me to sit down with him and talk about my feelings? Or, maybe, he wants me to be fragile and delicate and emotional. Well, I'm not. Leo and Dawn have that base covered; the ridiculous lot. I am strong willed and unbending.

"No one saw us," well, someone did. That was the whole point.

We're working on the bathroom now, starting a new structure. Tonight, we decided after jumping on the roof to see if it would cave in, that the girls are all moving into the same room. The extra one we finally built is going to be shared between Leo, Dawn and myself. I can't tell if I'm looking forward to it or not. This way I can spy on them with more ease, but this way, I also have to see them, regularly. Like, for hours. Like, shuck, who thought this was a good idea?

Like, we didn't need our own room, and we spent so shucking long building it. Now, we get our own bathroom, another addition to the Homestead. Seriously, it sucks. It's a waste of my time.

Gally looks at me, his crazy eyebrows up and his puffy cheeks burning red. I can't tell if he is shocked or if he is angry, but I do not care.

"Just come with me," Gally asks.

I turn back towards the Builders. Most of them are too busy building the frame to notice the conversation between Gally and I, with the exception of David. He stares at me through the brownish bangs that hang in his face.

It's because he sees me that I follow Gally into the Homestead.

He opens the door and maneuvers around a corner until I find myself in the same closet which David pulled me into after I punched Doug in the face. The place where David kissed me. His lips were soft against mine. His hands had lifted up into my hair, pulling me in.

Then I remember his lips were salty, and his hands were shaking. Gally's lips were rough, and course, and his palms firm and harsh when he pulled me in. The juxtaposition makes me scrunch up my nose. I can't help my sour expression when Gally turns to me.

"You usin' me?" He stares at me, firmly shutting the door behind him. He keeps his back pressed against it, trapping me in.

Of course I'm using him. "Why?"

"Well, isn't that what you girls do?" He demands, sour. "Dawn shacking around with Minho, Leo shacking Alby-"

"Leo isn't shacking anybody," I roll my eyes. As if she'd have it in her to kiss a boy. I have a feeling there is tension between her and a bunch of guys, one of those, will they won't they dramas which ends in a won't.

The last time I talked to her was when I agreed to get Gally to let Ben drink, but that was half a week ago. Before Alby decided to investigate anyway. It's mostly out of Ben's hands not, especially since if he was going to rat he would've by now.

"That's not the point," Gally begins, since he thinks the world revolves around him.

He doesn't get it. The Glade is small, and everybody's shucking klunk is all up in mine. There are like 40 some odd Gladers here, so everybody knows everybody. I try to know as little about the Builders as I shucking possibly can but to little avail. There is a world outside of us.

Like, Dawn is, almost a hundred percent sure, shacking Minho. Leo and Newt are running some sort of conspiracy, especially since if she is this good at lying it can't be the first time she has done it. David works in the kitchen with Dawn, who works with that fat cook, who is friends with Minho and Newt. It's all connecte; our small circle.

I'm surprised for such a tight knit group, one I've been haphazardly shoved into, a puzzle piece that doesn't fit, that they have managed to keep a couple secrets under wrap. I'm even more surprised that they don't know any of mine.

"The point is, you don't like me," he doesn't say it. Or, I guess he says it, but not like with the firmness that normally lingers. The silence that hangs in the air is unsure and a bit confusing. I am quite certain he doesn't no for sure. He is almost waiting for me to correct him. "You're just trying to get closer to me. Are you working with those girls?"

"You're full of yourself," I place my palms over my eyes, breathing out. "Like, shuck."

"Well, you kissed me to use me, seems about their MO," he rolls his eyes, his fists balling at his sides.

"I'm shucking close to getting in on their operations." I tell him, seething. "I've got at least Minho banished, and maybe Dawn. In a few days, I'll have Leo and Newt too. Stop being shucking impatient."

"Why did you kiss me then?" His voice rises in volume, as does the flush on his face. His hand wraps around something on the shelf, as he tears down whatever was there and smashes it off the ground.

Is he kidding me? I grab something else, some sort of cleaning supply or whatever, and whip it against the wall beside him. He ducks, unfortunately. "Because shucking David was watching, alright? And I was trying to piss him off."

"So, you knew he was watching? Are you trying to get banished?" The next thing he throws smashes into pieces, which shoot off the ground and collide against the small walls of this combined space.

"He shucking kissed me first. He rats, I say he kissed me and I turned him down." It doesn't matter, because David wouldn't do that. Even if I kissed Gally just to piss him off, David isn't the kind of guy who would kill me for it. He doesn't seem like the guy to be anything but sad, and I can't help the sinking feeling in my stomach. If Gally saw David and I kissing, I don't doubt he'd rat me out.

"So, it was just to piss off David huh?" He moves in closer to me until our chests are nearly pressed together. "This whole time, you didn't have feelings for him or for me? You've been playing us both."

I don't know what to think anymore. Was I just playing him and David? Why was I trying to piss David off anyway? For caring about me? "I don't answer to you Gally."

"Oh yes you do," he tells me, carefully. "Or else you'll get shucking banished."

What? "You're out of it Gally, shuck off."

I shove my way past him, letting him fall into the wall next to me. He grabs hold of wrist as I open the door. Trying to rip myself out of his grasp proves a struggle, but I manage to enter the hallway, dragging him behind me.

"I'll tell Alby I saw you beating up Dawn-"

"That isn't what shucking happened and you know it slinthead." I try to rip myself away from Gally, his grip only tightening.

"I can't trust you anymore," he lets go of me, and I stumble back. I don't find myself moving away though. I can't. I hate Gally. I hate being around him, and how demanding he is, and how he can't seem to trust me.

I hate that he threatens me and harasses me and just wants to control me. I hate that I am the person he is though. If I were in his shoes, I'd be doing the exact same thing. I can admire David all I want, and care about all the things he does for me, but Gally is really. We share broken bones.

"You don't tell me David has been making moves on you, you don't tell me what actually happened to Dawn, nor why you've been sneaking around. You don't tell me that you know something that could get them banished, and I assume you too, and you certainly haven't told me why Ben has been giving you dirty looks since he came back all broken and bruised. I don't know you anymore Dawn."

I don't know me either. David has let me go, but I feel myself falling into him. Not literally, I am standing, but he and I are being pulled closer together by a force I wouldn't comprehend. Our chests are pressed together. Breathing to the same beat, I can feel his heart thumping in my chest. His face is so close to mine.

I might actually kiss him. Not just to piss him off either.

"I wouldn't do that."

Gally doesn't move away from me; he only turns his head. I don't need to follow suit to know who interjected.

Alby is here, and I don't know how much he heard.

~~~~

Michelle, Michelle, Michelle. Tsk tsk. What are we going to do with you? What is Alby going to do? Predictions?

I really like where this is going. The book is almost over though!!! Only like, fifteen-ish chapters. Which, I know, seems like a lot. But its going to go by quickly.

Are you excited?

I'll see you soon, in Ella and Violet Lips