59 Michelle

I hate the sun. I hate living in this small little confined space. I hate those girls, I hate the Keepers, I hate the Builders, and overall, this place can shucking shove it.

"You seem angry," David remarks, beside me.

I thought he'd be in the kitchen, since the Builders are off today and tomorrow. Actually, I'm the only one who hasn't found something useful to do, as far as I can tell. A bunch of Builders are helping with repairs on buildings and stuff, and helping the Bricknicks organize their crap.

Gally had asked me to help him look over the sheets for the next building project. Claimed I had a natural eye for seeing flaws, or something else shucking ridiculous. Gally gets support systems; he understands wooden planks lined up together to make it as strong as possible. Dave is here because he gets embellishments. Drywalling, framing doors, roofing. It all makes sense in his head anyway.

I don't really even get what I'm looking at.

"I can't even tell that this is schematics," I turn the paper 90 degrees. Maybe I'm looking at it from the wrong angle.

David turns the paper on its head, pointing at the signature on the bottom. "Gally's scrawl is messy, but this is the proposal."

It has taken us about two and a half weeks to build the newest room on to the house; a task which isn't even supposed to be difficult. All it was, was putting up boards and such. When you have a crew of about ten guys, it should go by quicker I imagine.

"It's going to be an addition on to the bathroom," he notes, pointing at the tiny cubbies Gally scratched onto the page. "For you girls only. Probably so you can shower in peace."

I don't need to shower in peace. What we need, is to get out of this tiny Glade. There is nothing but suffering coming from these Walls anyway. Being here is not safe, and I don't like it one little bit.

"No but seriously, why're you pissed?" He asks, leaning in closer to me. His face doesn't approach mine, so I don't have to worry about him kissing me again.

I can trust Dave, right?

I almost scoff at the thought. What am I going off about? Trust, as if it's even a good idea. When has that gotten me anywhere? I trusted Leo to help me, and I almost got banished. It was Gally who's vote helped me, and it was Dave who told them he gave me the screwdriver.

So in a way, I can trust David. He's already stopped me from being banished once.

"Gally doesn't like the girls," I tell him.

David shrugs, looking up at me from the sheet of paper. His hand rests on the chair behind me, so he is completely turned to face me. "And?"

"And?" I ask. "He thinks Leo and Dawn are up to something."

"I take it you don't," confusion fuddles his brow.

I do? Or maybe I don't, but I saw the way Dawn approached Minho, Newt and Leo when we left the Deadheads. Whatever they were talking about, it was a big deal.

And I remember thinking to myself, why exactly did Minho care so much that Ben hurt Dawn? And why did he follow Ben into the forest anyway? How did he know someone hurt her? I figured, the obvious answer, that there is some truth to the rumours involving the two of them.

And perhaps, the rumours involving Leo and Alby weren't true. I could see Newt looking at her. Either Leo is an oblivious idiot, or she is cunning and leading him on. At the moment, I can't tell which is more likely.

"I think I know what happened to Dawn," his eyes light up at my words. He knows she was hurt; practically the whole Glade knows now. However, he took her place in the Kitchen, so he knows first-hand that whatever happened was bad enough she can't shucking bake. From what I gather, kitchen work is easy enough too.

"Tell Alby then," David is quick to jump in.

Is he shucking nuts? "Thanks for that advice. I'm not getting eight people banished."

His eyes only widen more. I can hear his breathing become heavier, if only slightly. It makes me feel uncomfortable, as if I am in tune with his body as well as mine. I'd say David was blowing this out of proportion, but he's not.

So, who exactly could get banished?

Me, certainly. Ben, Minho, and if I think what is happening is happening, Dawn, Leo, and Newt are joining in on that group. Which, honestly, is quite a few people.

I mean, maybe also David if one of them knew he kissed me. So, seven and not actually eight, but that's still a shuck ton.

"You're serious?"

I mean, I could tell him he could also be banished, but I don't want him to freak out anymore than he already is. I don't need anymore panic. If I'm honest, I realistically can't handle the panic that is already infecting his body and taking over. I can feel it from here. He and Leo should throw a shucking party.

"There is no way Alby is going to banished eight people." He shakes his head carefully.

"Minimum three," I'm sure if word gets out, I am one of the three who is being banished. Minho, Ben and I are all going down for what happened to Dawn. I think anyway.

"Are you one of those three?"

When I nod, he practically leaps out of his chair. "What happened?"

I don't know what to say. "I think someone is with Dawn."

"Like, they are shacking?" I've never heard the word before, but I assume it means exactly what I said. So I nod, and David's voice only raises.

I'm glad we are in the room where the Gatherings happen. After all, David is causing a bit of a scene. Nobody comes in here except the Keepers the rest of the time anyway. Maybe somebody sleeps in here, or something, but nobody shucking sleeps in the middle of the day.

"So what, the guy she is shacking hurt her and you hurt him back?" He asks. His eyes widen. "Has Dawn been shacking Ben? He's such a slinthead, I thought she'd know and do better."

"No, she hasn't." I begin, confused. "You think Ben is responsible?"

"He's got a shucking broken nose, and a shucked up jaw," Dave remarks. "Haven't you noticed him hanging around?" I suppose I have, but I knew his jaw got chucked when Minho hit him.

"Trust me, I noticed." I begin, and Dave pretty much slams his palms into his face.

"You beat someone else up?"

No, not me. But also, who is to say it wasn't me. I mean, both Minho and I will probably blame each other, and Ben will blame both of us.

"Doesn't matter," I brush him off, because there is no sense in arguing. I just hit another one of the Builders a few days ago, so why wouldn't I have hit Ben? Especially given Ben deserved it way more than Doug. "I think I should tell Gally."

David laughs. Like genuinely laughs, but in a way that makes the sound laced in anger and disbelief. It's not one that is comforting, but what that scares me deep into my bones. "Seriously? Gally doesn't shucking... he doesn't... he doesn't shucking give a klunk about you."

He trails off as he attempts to catch his breath and I flinch away. What is he going off about?

"He'll get you banished as soon as he'd get the rest of them banished, no pause no hesitation." He continues, shaking his head. "Like, are you shucking kidding me."

"He would not." I counter, crossing my arms. "We're a team."

David stills, and the room goes silent. This is scary. The lack of sound makes me think it's really. David isn't blowing up and screaming and fighting. His voice is quiet and calm, and I know he is serious.

"Gally doesn't care about you, he doesn't care about anything that isn't him. He selfish and pathetic and cruel-"

I push past David, but he grabs hold of me, "-and he doesn't give a shuck if you drop dead. He doesn't really care about you, not like-"

"Like what?" I rip myself out of David's hand, and he bounces back. "Like you do?"

David shakes his head. He reaches for me but his fingers shake. "No, it's not... I mean it is, but that's not why... There is more to this than you. Gally and I have a complicated history."

I turn away from him, and he grabs me. "Look, like seriously Michelle. Look at me."

I don't struggle and I don't know why.

"Yeah, I like you. I'd be stupid not to like you, alright? You've got no idea how hard it is to watch you waste your time on him. It's not because of you I dislike him. Gally is a bad person, who means bad news. It's a complicated story; I can't get into it now. All I can tell you, is that I care about you. He doesn't care about you at all. He doesn't care about anything except himself."

He doesn't kiss me, and I am thankful.

The door creaks open, and Gally is standing there. "What's happening?"

David pauses, and doesn't say anything. I don't see his expression because I am looking at Gally. Jaw dropped, eyes wide; he seems confused at the sudden calmness in the room, or perhaps it at my heaving chest. Maybe even, it is at the beat red colour of my face.

"Nothing," I shrug out of David's arm, moving into the hall.

Gally follows after me, but he doesn't shut the door.

"What was going on in there?" He asks, grabbing my arm from behind me.

Why does everyone keep grabbing me?

I spin to see Gally, staring at me. He seems more confused than concerned, his brows furrowed. Maybe he seems a little angry.

I can see David over his shoulder, leaning out the door. He is staring at me, concerned or lonely, or maybe he is just obsessed with me.

Shuck him.

I pull Gally towards me, knowing full well David can see us, and I kiss him.

~~~~~~

Someone needs to grab Michelle and put her on hold. Are you team Gally or Ben? I find myself on Team Michelle, but that's a complicated mess. Trust me, Michelle only gets worse from here on out. Much worse. And I love it.

I'll see you soon, in Ella and Dust.