Dawn 42

It is so late it is early when Minho comes through the door of the Maproom, moving on his feet slowly. I can't help but cock my head to the side. When he said tonight, I assumed he meant tonight. Not tomorrow morning.

"Sorry," he begins, moving closer to me in a harsh whisper. "It was hard to shake Newt off my trail."

I pull him towards me, hugging him tightly. Only slightly taller than I am, I stand on my tiptoes to pull myself up and fully over his shoulder. He is warm, and I miss the heat between us. If I was one for counting, I would know when we were last together. It was before the Runner died, certainly.

"Are you alright?" I begin, my lips trying to stifle the sound. "You haven't seen me since-"

"Stephen," Minho finishes for me. "Sorry, it was just..."

I don't make him finish, choosing to pull him tighter into me. Of course it was just... whatever it was. Stephen died. Having someone working for Minho not come back in one piece must've been hard enough without making him explain it.

"I just... I couldn't... I blamed myself." He starts the sentence over and over until he figures out what he means to tell me. "So I needed time."

"Min, its fine." I pull back so I can look at his face fully. "I get it."

He nods carefully.

A metal crash rings through my ears, and I move towards the door. Minho is there before I am, hiding me behind him as he peeks out.

"What's happening?" My voice is a harsh whisper.

Minho stands with his eyes facing towards the sound carefully. It's easy to forget that he is a person. We don't really talk much, since there isn't much to talk about. Here though, I remember he is a Runner. I remember he is one of the smartest and strongest here, and he is about to protect me from whatever sound is outside. I can see the fear brimming his eyes, and for a second it makes me think there is reason to be scared.

"Min-"

"I don't know Dawn," his voice is smooth. No harsh tones bleed from his cold eyes into his sweet lips. I wonder if he talks to everyone like he talks to me. I wonder if I talk to others the way I talk to him. Perhaps I do, but I couldn't be sure.

He steps outside, the light from the Maproom casting a glow on his body, displaying his shadow in front of him.

"Stay put."

I don't listen to him, stepping out and peering around. It's much darker outside than in, and my eyes haven't adjusted in this dim lighting.

Above us are stars. Twinkling and shining lights. I can see only Minho, in the yellow glow from the lantern lit and burning inside the room behind us, and the stars above. Otherwise, the Glade is as dark as the world was when I first woke up. I almost hate that millions of stars can see us this night, but he and I will never be together under the sun.

I can't help the smile that forms on my face when Minho turns around, not because I am happy I can't see him during the day, but because I am happy I can see him. His chocolate eyes look at me, and I realise this is the first time I have seen him in the starlight. The first we have been together without hiding, or without other people surrounding us.

The sun is a star too, so in a way, we've been seen by more suns than anyone could imagine.

I can't help but reach forward for him, as he turns around.

"It was the box," he answers, looking over at it.

The heavy metal lid doesn't normally move about on its own.

"Swung shut in the wind?" I ask, turning towards the box.

He grabs me by the wrist, gently, and brings me back to the Maproom. "We don't leave it open. Bet some wasted Glader tripped on it after breaking into Gally's supply last night. Newt will deal with it in the morning."

I quickly move into the Maproom, shutting the door behind me. Minho gives me an odd look, but ultimately a smirk plays his lips.

"Just dying to be alone with me?" He asks, crossing his arms over his chest. "I know it's been a few days since you've seen me Dawn, but-"

"Please," I roll my eyes playfully. "If I was really that needy, do you think I'd wait this long?"

I play it off like I'm not thinking about Newt, and about the secret. As if Minho didn't remind me what I needed to tell him. Newt knows. He knows everything about us, and he could make our universe crumble.

"You're right," he continues. "Every boy in the Glade has been trying to shack it up with you since you first got here. You don't need me for a minute."

I crinkle my nose at that sentence. My mind is trapped between a clever retort, an eye roll, and a question. I can't tell if he thinks I don't want to be with him. Why would he? I've been trying to talk to him for a few days.

"Minho," I begin, and he stiffens, stepping closer to me.

He doesn't say anything. Words couldn't take the firmness out of my feet. Instead, he takes my hands. His grip is firm, but he caresses my hand, searching through every inch. Trying to know my skin in a way I don't. In a way I want to know his.

I can't tell him. For the second I do, he will leave me. For some reason, that bothers me. Do I like him? I mean, we have fun, but more than like him? Not just flirting-and-kissing like him? Something-more like him?

"Newt knows," I begin.

I watch his brow furrow, as he takes a step back from me, ripping his hand from mine. "About us?"

"About something," I correct. "He knows that one of us girls and one of you-"

"How long have you known?" He demands, his eyes going sour.

"A couple days-"

"A couple days?" He raises his voice to a harsh sound. I don't care to worry if he will wake up the Glade. Let them wake up. Let them hear him speak. "You didn't tell me."

"We're not going to get caught," I begin.

"You don't shucking know that." He steps closer to me, his eyes twitching. "I don't know that. Shuck, we almost did. Dawn what were you-"

"What was I thinking?" I ask back. "I was thinking that it didn't matter. Newt isn't going to rat out his best friend. He was with Leo when he heard us, and he wouldn't look. Leo already knows, and she isn't going to betray us. She also isn't going to let Newt. You really think Newt-"

"It doesn't matter what I think," he steps away from me, moving further into the Map-room. "You didn't tell me, Dawn. You didn't tell me something serious. One of us could be killed and you don't have the decency-"

"I didn't think it mattered-"

"To tell me someone knows about us, and of course it matters. You could shucking die."

"What is there to know?" I ask. "What are we Minho? Are we friends?"

He looks at me funny, not quick to quip back. He takes his hands, pulling at the straps on his shoulders, until the Runner gear is gone. Until it is just me, and the boy in the blue shirt. Not just the one in the Maze, but the one who climbed a wall to be with me. The one who threw apple slices at me across the dinner table, and who lies next to me on the ground in the middle of the night.

The beautiful boy, whose brown eyes I could drown in. Whose eyes crinkle when they meet mine. Who seems to shake when he stares at me. He doesn't love me.

"Dawn, you don't get this place yet." His words are smoother and reassuring, and I back away from him.

"Don't patronize me." Just because I have only known two weeks, doesn't mean I know nothing. He is more than a fool if he thinks I am just going to come quietly. I am not some flower that needs to be protected. I get it, okay? In a way that is different from Minho, but not any less accurate.

"I'm not patronizing you, you are patronizing me." He argues back. "You don't realize the risk you are putting yourself under-"

"Minho, I get the risk." I stop him.

"No Dawn, you-"

"No Minho." There is something laced in my tone that makes his head snap over towards mine. In a way that makes me realise he hadn't been listening to me before. Now, he must hear my words.

"I don't go out in that Maze like you, but I have seen the Grievers." I tell him. "I know what they do. I almost saw Michelle get banished. Believe me when I say, I know the risk. Am I worried that Newt is going to tell Alby? Not really, but let's say he did. It's worth it to be with you. It's all about you. You don't realise I will be banished before you. The girl everyone wants to get their mitts on, the one who everyone thinks is a bloody flirt; she will be the one who seduced you. Which means she will be the dead girl. Not you, the revered Keeper of the Runners. Me, the girl who is more joke than person. But I would tempt fate just to try and be with you."

He reaches forward, arms trying to taste my skin. "That's what I'm worried about Dawn. I'm worried about you."

"Stop speaking," I knock his wrist away from my body, stepping back. I didn't realise how hot my face felt. Nor did I remember how salty tears were, until I taste them now. "You don't want to be with me."

He shakes his head. "That's not what is happening. You've been lying to me and putting yourself in danger."

"What are we Minho?" I ask him, cocking my head to the side. "Are we people who flirty with each other, or are we something else?"

I'm trying to ask myself too, because I don't know. Over the last two weeks I've finally been able to figure myself out. I'm funny, I'm independent, I'm determined, I'm sarcastic, I'm a tease, and I'm with him. Although, I can't figure out what that means. Do I love him? Does he even care about me?

"Dawn," he begins, but I don't turn to face him. I can hear the crack in his voice. It weighs on my shoulders, pushing me deeper into the Earth until I lose sight of the stars.

I let the door shut behind me.

~~~~~~~~

Okay, everyone here deserves better than this. It sucks, because I don't think either of them are wrong.

Who do you think is more right?

Have a good day. I'll see you soon in; Michelle and An Uncomfortable Confrontation.