
05: I'm Confused
5 Leo
It is still dark when I wake up. The ground is soft, and it sticks to my face by the dew that clings to it. Peeling my face off the ground, I can feel the dirt that hangs on my skin, and with a quick raise of my hand, I brush it off.
I couldn't tell you what hour of the night it is. When I look back towards the house, I notice the fire and the party around it have completely disappeared. Its warmth is no longer in the air, and neither is its energy.
I sniff, before coughing as I pull myself off of the ground. Last night wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. Avoiding the party and the boys along with it proved to be a very easy task, since they were all pre-occupied. Besides, the garden was empty and I was free to explore it.
In this black moment, time stands still. On her feet, I don't move, don't even breathe. There is no one else up, as I look around searching for a sign of another living being. There are bodies strewn about on the ground around the fire, as well as some in hammocks farther off from the centre. I manage to be on the very outskirts, sleeping only a couple meters from where tomatoes grow from the ground.
Light cracks over the walls, and time seems to begin rolling again. It casts a glow over me, as I must stand in the far west of the field. The light manages not to hit the plants at first. They are in the shadow of the stone walls that surround us, keeping me trapped.
The grass looks bright, almost yellow in the soft light. Even if the sun is moving, it finally feels serine. Maybe it's not time stopping I'm looking for, but solitude, and the peace in it. So far, the people around me have proven to be nothing but chaotic.
But when the sun kisses me, I feel as if I could breathe in this field for more than a minute.
A loud banging sounds stops me from my thoughts. For a second, I think I've been shot from the way my body freezes and my hands clamp shut. My feet sink into the ground, trapping the soles of my boots deep within the earth, and I only sink deeper with every passing thought.
Rough scraping, unlike the metal of the box that brought me here, fills the area. Something is being ripped to shreds, and torn apart, and it is so high pitched it rattles my brain. It hurts, but I cannot flinch to cover myself. I cannot even move.
The wall breaks apart before me, massive block tearing open, and just now I realise how they must have closed. Something is ripping them open, and maybe it is one of those monsters that Dawn found in that maze.
I do not scream, but I find the ability to run. It jumps into my feet, and they spring back as I sprint away from the walls. There is nowhere to escape and nowhere to breathe.
My body rams into something hard and I knock myself over. It's my shoulder that hits the ground first and then I am able to roll on to my back. The loud sound has stopped. Suddenly it's just me in this field again.
"What are you shucking doing?" A boy grunts beside me.
I turn myself up and over, to see the boy who sits on the ground next to me, scratching the back of his neck.
"Sorry," I manage, as I realise I must look like a crazy person. "It's just the walls."
"Right, you were locked up last night when they moved," he sighs. When he moves up I watch him crack his back. He doesn't extend a hand to help me up, and it some ways I am grateful for it. Only been here maybe 12 hours and I'm already running into people and behaving like a lunatic.
"Sorry." I repeat, but he shrugs it off.
"I never did get your name," he begins.
"Leo," I nod to him.
When their leader was pestering me for my name earlier, I assumed that Newt hadn't told anyone it. Which is odd, because I know he knows it. Unless he hit his head when he fell into the box, but I doubt that. He was up and running only seconds later, and despite his limp I doubt he was hurt.
That being said, it seemed as though the ginger and the youngest girl were keeping their names secret. As far as I know, they didn't tell anybody, and they certainly didn't tell me.
"I'm Minho," he says, as he looks over his shoulder, "and duty calls."
"Good luck." I offer, as I watch him jog off towards the maze doors, unsure of where he is going. None of the other boys would go in there, but for some reason it seems like it's his job.
"That's the dumbest thing a greenie's ever said to me," he laughs, "but thanks."
There are so many odd words in here, which cling together in ways I don't understand. As far as I can tell, it seems as though I am from the same place as most of the other boys, so I don't get why their slang escapes me. Nevertheless, I can't help but wonder what all the words he says mean.
"Hey shank!" I hear someone call out behind me, and I know the voice to be that of the blonde.
She is behind me, and jogging up towards me. The clothes she is wearing are the same clothes she was wearing yesterday. Dark green pants that are rolled up to just below her knees, and a light blue button up she leaves untucked at her front. It looks slept in however, as is expected, and I can see from where her sleeve is rolled up, a dark stain.
"What are you doing up so early?" She asks.
I shrug, "I didn't do it on purpose. I sort of woke up."
"I'm exhausted from that bonfire." She yawns as she says it, before she begins to undo her hair from the messy pony tail it is in. She takes the elastic between her teeth and talks through it. "I difn't ssee you there."
"I wasn't there." I answer, moving my hand up to my head. My hair is also in a ponytail, although my hair barely travels down to my neck while it's up, where hers moves almost to the bottom of her ribcage.
I watch as her hands spiral down her hair, creating a long braid on one side of her head. Her fingers move nimbly, so she must have done this before. Although, I doubt she remembers it.
When she finishes with half of her hair, she moves on to the others half. "You should've come. I had a blast, the boys here know how to party."
That may be true, but that doesn't mean I know how to party. I don't exactly know what I know anyway. All that is apparent in the morning, is that she is more radiant than the sun, and more magnetic as well.
"So what exactly is the deal around here?' I ask, watching her hands wind down to the end.
She shrugs her shoulders. "Beats me. I think today we get to choose exactly what it is we do here. There's a bunch of different jobs."
When she finishes, she looks down at her hair and lets it go. It stays in place, but threatens to untwine. My fingers rip the hair tie out of my hair, and I hand it to her. She nods, before taking it and wrapping it around the end of her braid.
"You sure you don't need it?"
I'm not sure, but it's too late now. Besides, it's not like there isn't anything here that I could use to tie up my hair in the event I need to do so.
"Are we just waiting for those other girls to wake up?" I ask, not feeling the need to answer her question.
She shakes her head. "I doubt that ginger chick is out of the lock up yet, and that tiny girl is asleep somewhere I imagine."
"Lock up?" I ask, as my head flies over to the giant concrete block. "What exactly is it that she did at the party?"
"Beat up a boy," she answers. "Pretty bad. The med-jacks had to give him stiches I heard."
"Med-jack?" I ask. Is that her funny accent?
"They heal the boys around here," she answers. "Get where the med comes from but not so much the jack. They probably know jack all is what it is."
She begins to move, and it takes a second for my feet to figure out they ought to be following her.
"She's alright though?" I demand, trying to move so I can look at the blonde. "The ginger, I mean, she is fine?"
She stops, looking me up and down. When her head cocks to the side, the long braids move along with her. She bites her lip, before a snicker leaves her mouth. A hand takes my hand, and I shake back before I can even process what is happening.
"I'm Dawn." She tells me.
Right, we don't know each other's names. I don't know the first thing about her, yet Dawn seems to be my closest ally in this whole field. The little quiet girl is more reclusive than anything, and the fiery one is a little too brutal to be trusted. From what I can tell, I'm not like either of those girls. That isn't to say I am like Dawn, but maybe that I wish I was.
"Leo," I answer.
She snickers, and her nose crinkles at that. "Right, Leo."
When she turns on her heels, I continue after her. I'm still not entirely sure where we are going, but hopefully she will be able to find some clarity in the mess.
"So, what are you looking for?" I ask.
"Man, everyone here is all questions aren't they?" She rolls her eyes, playfully shoving me sideways.
"That would explain why there aren't many answers." I remark, and she can't help but laugh.
"Well, maybe Alby will be able to provide us with one." She tells me. "He's the one in charge, right?"
I shrug, raising my hands in defense. As if I would know. He is the one who calls the shots, but that other boy, Newt, seems to be high up in their order as well. Only he isn't allowed in the maze. That Minho kid was though. They're hierarchy is all out of whack, and I can't really wrap my head around it.
"Anyway, he told me to come find him in the morning, with the others," she says, "and I am assuming by others he meant you and the tiny girl. Did you ever catch her name?"
I shake my head. "None of us caught each other's names. You are the first I managed to grasp."
"Right," she answers. "They said you were hiding them from those blokes, or whatever. Shanks? I don't really get your slang."
"It's not my slang," I mutter. "I'm just as lost as you."
Dawn pulls open the door to the house we have approached, and as I look amongst the sleeping boys outside, I don't catch an eye on the small girl, or any boy who I really recognise.
When I enter the room, my feet stop dead beneath me. There is a circle of boys in front of me, each firmly occupying a chair, and each whose head turns to stare at me. Dawn casually moves to a chair, and pats on the one next to her for me to move on it.
It takes a second for me to move forward, sitting in between her and the small girl. The flame is still gone, probably still in that prison they held us in only hours ago. Why would she go and beat up a boy?
"Glad that you are finally up." The red-faced boy remarks. "We've been waiting for you."
"I thought you'd have been out, after how you behaved last night." Dawn retorts, and a few of the boys in the circle chuckle at this.
"We aren't here to talk about the bonfire. That has already been discussed." Alby notes, trying to maintain some sort of order.
I will give that to the boys around me. Order is something they manage to maintain. Surprisingly, a group of teenagers can behave in an organised, respected system. Somehow I feel as if I'm messing up a whole way of life. As if I'm not supposed to be here.
Why am I here?
"I am not taking them on, end of story." The red boy mutters.
"Oh thank you!" Dawn sighs in relief.
Take us on? I thought we were here to pick what it is we are going to do here.
"So, like," I begin, "what is happening?"
"Did no one give them a tour?" Newt pipes in from across the circle.
Everyone looks at each other, as if they are expecting one or the other to say yes. We haven't been given a tour. I barely know where I am, let alone what is happening around me.
He stands up, rolling his eyes. "Alby, we can't expect them to pick jobs unless they know exactly what goes on in the Glade. We should reconvene after dark."
Alby looks puzzled as if realising he has left us all without any information. "Another gathering?"
"That way Minho can be there, and we can get a fair vote." Another boy pipes in.
"I don't want to come back again." Someone groans.
"Well, maybe you should let someone else be keeper in your place, shank."
"Enough," Alby says. "Let's just make a formal decision."
"On what?"
I'm the one who asks the question, and no one answers. Either because they don't know how to answer me, or because they don't want to. I doubt it is the later though, seeing as everyone seems confused.
"On if we should give you time to decide," Alby says, "and to save the time and trouble, I am going to assume we are all unanimous?"
No one speaks.
"These shanks won't last long. We might as well stick them somewhere for the meantime and wait for them to take care of themselves." The red faced boy remarks.
He is so unpleasant.
"It's just you on that Gally," Alby notes. "So we'll reconvene after dark?"
No one argues further, but no one gets up and moves.
"So, then get off to work." Alby stands up, shewing off the boys. "And I'll give these ones a tour."
Everyone is quick to get up, and I follow suit. Dawn moves from beside me, closer to Alby. I follow her, until we are in front of the boy.
"Alby, here, I'll take them," Newt says. "You should probably talk to the Gladers about the new changes that are coming."
Alby stares at Newt for a second, but the blonde boy stands firm. The leader nods, moving out with the rest of the boys.
Once they are all gone, it is Newt, Dawn, the quiet girl, and I left in the room. He smiles at me, before glancing around the room.
"So, I'd better show you around the Glade."
~~~~~~~~~~
Leo is so sweet and kind. Unfortunately the world is crashing down around her.
Who is your favourite Glader?
Be confused until Sunday.
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