can you tell that i wrote this at 2am
...

Stephen has joined the chat.

Stephen has added Y/N.

Stephen: Hi. Have a moment?

Loki has joined the chat.

Loki: I have a moment to stAB YOU.

You: stOp

Stephen: Do you have nothing better to do, Loki?

Loki: Living the life of luxury can get boring so I'm using you as inspiration for my next play.

Loki: Spoiler: u die

You: Why would you spoil it for me?!

Loki: Spoiler: because

Stephen: Stop bad mouthing me on social media.

Loki: I have never?

Stephen: "@trickstersgods: stephen strange thinks he's so great with his $3 toupee i see it fluttering in the wind"

Stephen: And the one that backfired

Stephen: "@lokifan1: @ trickstersgods my a s s"

Stephen: "@mercwithteethhole: @lokifan1 damn asgardians be freaky hmu"

Stephen: "@lokifan1: im fandral... not loki"

You:

Loki: I can't control what my fans say. Or what kinks they're into.

Stephen: How long did it take you to make those accounts?

Loki: Spoiler: u die but twice

Stephen: Spoiler: I've died plentiful, you don't scare me.

You: Can I leave this chat... please for the love of myself... where is father Clint when I need him...

Stephen: No, I needed to ask you something.

Loki: WE'RE listening.

Stephen: Please refer to your texts, Y/N (:

Loki: wow stingy lmao ok then I'll remember this you fake ass wizard, Harry Potter cosplaying muggle,,,,

You: Yes! Of course! I'd love that, Stephen!

Loki: What did he ask you? How to be a real wizard? How to get a date?? How to get good hair?

Stephen: Don't speak about my hair when your wig perpetually oozes grease.

Loki: it's OIL

Stephen: I'm glad you're pleased, Y/N. Could I come over later and we can discuss it further?

Loki: Spoiler: tell me or everyone dies

You: No one can die if I don't watch your play.

Loki: You would NOT

You: I WOULD

Loki: Spoiler: our friendship is over

You: Spoiler: no it's not

Grandmaster has joined the chat.

Stephen: Are you on Earth?

Grandmaster: Er, no I'm not in birth.

You: how ---

Loki: Just let it happen.

Grandmaster: I like your friends, Loki. They're very, uh, charmingly idiotic.

Loki: Spoiler: i know

Grandmaster: Especially you, Y/N.

Loki: ... um don't replace me when I'm right here??

You: did you just call me an idiot?!

Grandmaster: No, no, you shine above the rest, which isn't really hard considering... well, everything about them.

Grandmaster: Your way with social media has really captured me and I'd like for you to help me set up some accounts.

You: One moment please!

( meanwhile! )

You
do u know the grandmaster
he thought earth sounded like birth even tho those two words read differently

Thor
yes he has a cool stick i know him

You
...disco stick?

Thor
don't you bring gaga into this

You
fine, is he cool?

Thor
not really he had prisoners with benefits or something like that and he chopped off my hair even tho that worked out fine, also he strapped me to a CHAIR without asking me if i was down with that uh, what was that movie stark tricked steve into watching? 45 shades of grains? anyway that wasn't cool also he made me fight hulk :( hulk & i are 💚❤ he also has a ship that shoots fireworks into the air which is so bad for the atmosphere. he's an old man that contributes to pollution DON'T trust him......... but also win him over bc we can use his stick (it's like a big wand that kills people) to stop thanos

You
I'm sorry but i blacked out for a few seconds reading all of that but i think i get the gist of it

( fin! )

You: I'd love to help you.

Grandmaster: Great!

Grandmaster has left the chat.

Loki: YOU'RE really going to help him? WHY.... I need all your attention or I'll wither away.

You: Yeah, from what Thor told me, he probably just wants a dating acc for old aliens or something :/ spoiler: I'm gonna rob him

Y/N has left the chat.

Loki: so brave... so foolish...

Stephen: Like you, but you're weak.

Thanos has joined the chat.

Thanos: hey girls

Loki: anyway so stephen

Thanos: how's it going

Loki: DIE RASPBERRY GIANT OOMPA LOOMPA

Thanos: damn you dont have to be rude...

Loki: stephen why didn't you just make a portal that went SLICE by his torso? the deaths of half the universe was better than making him shorter?

Stephen: You know, in this respect, you just may be the best wizard.

Loki: My mama didn't raise a weak ass midgardian with linguini magic arms

Thanos: wow loki you've changed :/

Loki:  w here are you texting us from

Thanos: wouldn't you like to know

Loki: THAT'S WHY I ASKED YOU DUMBASS

Loki: anyway it's your silly plague farm right?

Thanos: stalker..

Stephen: The only reason I stay in this chat is to wait for Y/N to return so I may discuss my important matter with them further.

Thanos: omg what are we discussing

Stephen: Not with you.

Thanos: mean girl. . .

Loki: Just choke me out already so I don't have to witness this.

Thanos: i don't like you that way...

Thanos: where's y/n? Aren't you two like best friends? Lmao... did they dump you?

Stephen: Loki and Y/N are perfectly fine. How's your daughters? Oh wait, did they spit on your face and declare their hate so boldly that they stated they'd defile your corpse with the excretion of animals?

Thanos: wtf are you spying on me??

Loki: I feel like hurling. That was disgusting but even I would go to such lengths.

Thanos: remember what goes around comes around sweaty :)

Loki: s we aty

Loki: Where is the Clint man?!

Clint has joined the chat.

Clint: I'm here sweaties

Stephen: No. No. No. No. I hate that word. It is incorrect.

Thanos: Clint more like

Thanos: what rhymes with Clint

Clint: sweaty pls :) thanos? than-tata outta here :) crops? soon to be corpse. hakkuna ma get out:)

Loki: Nothing makes sense other than Clint's ability to be subtlety morbid.

Thanos: we will see when you need help Clint who will help you we will see

Thanos: you will need me you wrinkled little man

Loki: What's wrong with wrinkles? Absolutely nothing!

Clint: boo boo:)cry some more:) hate me but u want to be me :) I see u looking from outside the club:) bouncer thor:) shoving Stormbreaker out the door:) u run in fear tinnos

Bucky has joined the chat.

Bucky: what the f----

Bucky: what is this?!

Bucky: clint snap out of it!

Thanos: bucky? More like yucky

Bucky: listen birch I hold the presence of Britney and you shall respect it.

Loki: it's Bucky...

Bucky: BITFH

Y/N has joined the chat.

You: I have seen thinfs...noghing can be worse...mg god... I'm shaking....

Thanos: omg hey

You: whattheFkcwhatthefkc GET OUT

Loki: What did you see? Alien. . . Booty?

You: no.no was I supposed to see that?? What.??? No??? The site had sensual user bios okay and the grandmaster wanted me to type WORD FOR WORD his bio I can't

Clint: I'll get the bleach

Clint: to drown thanos

Thanos: this is why you're the least favorite avenger

Clint: Do I look... like I care...

Thanos: Actually no you always look angry???

You: I got the stick

Loki: The stick, or the stick ;)?

Stephen: The weapon, they mean.

Loki: Hand it over.

Thanos: what stick

Thanos has been disconnected.

Clint: call quake bc im QUAKING

Clint has been disconnected.

Stephen: Y/N, some tea? And we can continue our discussion?

You: Yes. Thanks.

Loki: WHY ARE you leave me AGAIN

Loki: I NEED attention 24/7 or I'll break things to get it

You: I love you.

Loki: I love... you too...

Loki: ugh fine go off but be back soon because my play is almost ready

Stephen: Is "I love you" the equivalent to catnip for him?

You: Um, yeah now that I think about it.

Y/N has left the chat

Stephen has left the chat.

Grandmaster has joined the chat.

Loki: What's this site you joined?

Grandmaster: A dating site ;)

Loki: Yeah but WHICH is it? Name?

Grandmaster: What, you uh, want to join?

Loki: Something like that.

Loki has left the chat.

Grandmaster has left the chat.

( later )

Thor has joined the chat.

Thor: hello?? anyone?

Bucky: hi... I'm here for u

Thor: I have been receiving messages

Thor: sultry messages

Thor: I don't know why BUT I've never signed up for such a thing I'm scared

Bucky: oh the Grandmaster's site huh

Bucky: can i borrow your phone? I'll make the messages stop

Thor: yes, thank you so much Britney

Steve has joined the chat.

Steve: Bucky. Do you think this is funny?

Bucky: yes.

Steve: I don't want to go on someone's spaceship!

Thor: r.i.p captain (idk when u were born -now, killed by winky faces)

Thor has left the chat.

Bucky: you know what steve

Steve: What?

Bucky: I don't know I just needed to stall you long enough lol GOTTA BLAST

Bucky has left the chat.

Steve has left the chat.