
Dare #76
BlazeEternal dares:
I dare Hotshot to act like an angry drunken femme for 5 days, and after he has to overdo it with working at the Academy as in being like Chase, Whirl, and Medix mixed together for the day.
Hotshot: *reads that last part* do you WANT me to die?!
*that morning*
Recruits: *chilling in the lounge*
Hotshot: *stumbles into the doorway and rests his servo on it to support himself* heylo- *faceplants into the floor*
Recruits, look on in horror when they see that Hotshot has these on:
Hotshot: *muffled screaming* WHY IS THE FLOOR SO RUDE-
Recruits:
*later*
Hotshot: *stumbling into Hero Hall* MY LIVER IS RUINED AND MY UTERUS IS SCREAMING AT ME-
Everyone:
Hotshot: *faceplants into the floor again* GOD THIS FUCKING FLOOR-
*the next day, in class*
Hotshot: *studying Wedge closely, literally*
Wedge: *literally backed away as far as he can go* may I help you?
Hotshot: *loses his grip on the desk and faceplants into Wedge's lap* MOTHERFUCKER-
Wedge: oh hey! I can definitely help out with that!
Medix: *W R E N C H*
*later*
Hotshot: *having the time of his life in his jet mode* woo-hoo!!! Watch me do a sonic boom guys!!
Recruits: *literally trying to pull him out of the bushes as he flatulates*
*the next day*
Hotshot: *slurring* you know the good old saying!
Whirl: which on-
Hotshot, slurring:
Whirl: Hotshot? Are you dru-
Medix: *has to recharge with that mess at night* don't encourage him.
*later*
Hotshot: *falling down the stairs*
Recruits: *just watches*
*the next day*
Hotshot: *laying on a table* hayy-
Medix: I want a divorce.
Hotshot: *table breaks*
*the final day*
Hotshot: *crying in a Mercedes Benz* MY WIFE LEFT ME. EVERYTHING SUCKS-
Wedge: Hotshot. Why are you using Hero Hall to sit in a Mercedes Benz?
Hotshot: SHUT UP OR I'LL SUCK YOUR GODDAMN DI-
*later*
Hotshot: *shoves out all the supplies on the third shelf of the medical cabinet because Medix isn't paying attention to him*
Medix: *threatens him to pick it all up*
Hotshot: *picks it all up and puts it back*
Medix: *still doesn't give him attention*
Hotshot:
*in the final hours*
Hotshot: *taking off the heels*
*3 minutes later*
Hotshot: BABY!!! *kicks his leg up and dramatically drapes himself in Medix's arms* my hips... have LIED to me.
Medix: *drops him as she walks over to the couch with a book* that's nice, dear.
Hotshot: *just ragdolls into her lap* LOOK AT MY HIPS! *shoves his aft in her face*
Medix: *sighs*
Hotshot: *straddles her* baby...
Medix: *grabs his hips*
Hotshot: *moans*
Medix: yeah they're not lying.
Hotshot: *goes in for a kiss*
Medix: *easily and smoothly shoves his face to the side*
Hotshot: *shrieks as he falls off of her* BITCH!
Medix: *inhales*
Medix, to Hotshot: (WARNING: LOTS OF FOUL LANGUAGE)
Blades, off to the side:
Heatwave, after walking in the room and hearing that:
Wedge, in the vents:
Hotshot, 20 minutes later and in the timeout corner:
*the next day*
Hotshot: I HAVE REORGANIZED THE WHOLE MEDICAL BAY, COLOR COORDINATED ALL THE BOOKS IN THE LIBRARY, MOWED THE LAWN WITH SCISSORS AND MADE SURE EACH BLADE OF GRASS WAS 4 INCHES LONG. I TOOK ALL THE LEAVES FROM THE PILE OUTSIDE AND GLUED THEM BACK TO THE TREES, I TOOK ALL THE PEBBLES AND SMALL ROCKS FROM THE GROUND AND SEPARATED THEM BY SIZE AND BY TEXTURE, I REPAINTED EVERY ROOM, FUCKED UP IN ONE OF THEM SO I HAD TO DO THAT AGAIN. WROTE DOWN EVERY. SINGLE. POLICE CODE. EACH ONE IN DIFFERENT COLORS TOO. I WATERED THE DOG, WALKED THE PLANTS, SAVED THE RAINFOREST, ENDED WORLD HUNGER, PLANTED A TREE EVERY TIME I TOOK A BREATH, A N D I CLEANED THE WHOLE ACADEMY. AND IT'S ONLY NOON.
Hoist: ...so is that "yes" that you want a quesadilla, or no?
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