I don't really remember the beginning. I do remember laying in front of the fire in my little home in Russia. I had both of my sisters with me at the time. Our mama was knitting quietly as my big sister read little sister Natalya and I a story. I do not remember the story anymore, and I wish I could remember the way big sister read it to us. I remember our parents yelling at each other. Then my papa got sick. We had to leave our little home. We also had to leave our papa behind.

Big sister Kataya held little sister's hand as we walked through empty streets. At the time, I thought nothing of it as it was winter and winter oftentimes got to cold for people to go out. It was very cold that night, all we had to protect us from the wind, was our coats and hats.

My mama walked ahead of us; never looking at us. I asked her once where we were going, but she wouldn't tell me. Mama left us then. She left us on the doorstep of a cold building. I was very afraid, big sister told me not to be; that we would be alright. We lived in the cold building, waiting for mama to come back.

Little sister got sick. Big sister took good care of her.

'Don't worry Ivan' mama will be back for us.' She would tell me.

Mama never came back.

Little sister Natalya died during her sleep and big sister Kataya got sick.

Mama never came.

I waited with my sisters, holding their cold hands. I told them stories, ones I remembered Kataya told me. I sang songs of sunshine. I told them the nightmares I had. I stopped calling them Sister. They were no longer my sisters. They were Gods daughters now, I could not bear to take away their glory.

I left them in the cold house, I had to find someone to help me. I wanted to find mama. After many days of search, I was forced to find shelter from the winter. I climbed a very tall building all the way to the top. It was still cold, but I could see everything I wanted to. Except for people. I never saw people anymore. After many more days, I began my search again. I didn't find anyone, however someone found me.

He was a tall man with a kind face, he was pale like me and had green eyes. I didn't understand why I trusted him. Perhaps it was the similarity to my Papa? I wish now someone had told me not to trust him. The man took me to a place full of people. They were all there. I now know that this is a shelter for survivors. There I found out that the world was ending. That there were events happening in the world and an illness that was taking over people that made them evil.

I stayed in the shelter for many weeks. Until one night someone started into my quarters. I couldn't see who the stranger was. They slowly got closer and closer to me. I could almost see the whites of their eyes, grey like a uzhasnaya zima. I pulled the covers higher over my head, in hopes that I could protect myself from the sudden storm. The stranger lunged upon me suddenly, grabbing a hold of my neck a shaking me. I tried screaming, but no sound came. I pushed him away, the stranger I recognized as the nice man who found me. I ran out of the quarters, fear taking my legs and mouth; I screamed 'Savage! Dikar!' I could hear the man chasing after me. Alarms began to go off. Other people began to emerge from their quarters. Men dressed in white full body suits shoved past me. They took down the savage man. They killed him. I don't remember how they killed him, but I remember his blood covering their white uniforms and the white walls.

In days that passed much was discussed. Chaos ensued and people started to run from the shelter. I watched a mother leave during the night with her children. My heart ached for the family that left me behind. I wanted to cry as the mother looked pointedly at me, as though it was all my fault. I rarely spoke to anyone after that incident. No one spoke to me anyway. They were all afraid that I was infected.

Four days after, there was another infection. A young woman whose name I remember as Anya. She always seemed pleasant to me and always waited until everyone else had been taken care of. She reminded me of Big Sister Kataya. I didn't know that she was infected. Just like the man, she seemed normal until she didn't. After Anya went Savage, I left the shelter. I was going to find my own way, beyond the borders of Russia. I wanted to find somewhere safe, away from the sickness. After a year of trying to find the end of frozen barriers, I learned that there was no safe place from the sickness. All places were infected and so many people were dying or being infected.

When I was nearly fifteen years of age, after surviving countless months fighting off the savages, I caught wind of an opportunity. It was an opportunity that many people were trying to take, one that was deadly and may never work. The United States government issued a purge, one that killed many of the remaining population. Not long after the government shut down fully and disappeared. Now the land that used to be the United States was free ground for anyone who dared the journey. The only problem? There was an ocean between even the easternmost part of Russia and Alaska. I pondered the solution many days and nights to no avail.

While searching for food, I came across a group of people; many of them from Europe and searching easy passage to the US. I offered them a place to stay, a little abandoned building, far away from where I was living. That night I packed my stuff and began my trip east.

I didn't make it farther than the Chinese border, where I intended to find a boat or something to travel across the ocean. I knew I couldn't attempt Alaska, from what I managed to read from abandoned stores. The only reason I didn't die on the Chinese border was the group that I had tried to fool some year ago. Starving and injured, they swooped in and rescued me.

I joined their little group and together we searched for a safe route to what used to be Canada. From there we deemed it safe enough to travel south to the US.

I don't think I could ever trust someone outside of my family after what happened in the shelter, but these people became my family. We had each other's backs no matter what. I found out that so many people had suffered with a situation similar to mine, but ended up dying before they could succeed in finding safety. I know that I was safe up until the moment I tried leaving. There were still governments that were working underground, trying to stop people from fleeing into different countries or out of their own. I nearly got caught by both Russian and Chinese border officials. Both parties were dressed similar to the men who killed savages at the shelters or on mission. I wondered if they were even Russian or Chinese. Maybe someone else. I didn't bother to ask my new friends about them, because I knew what the answer would be. I heard it far too often and tried to find new ways to say it.

It took years for us to successfully border jump. After that, we were no longer under any protection, as we would find out later. Now our journey had really begun.