Wattpad wouldn't let me change to any other font for certain parts so it's all in the same font, sorry about that.

Asher.

"What the hell are you doing with your life?" Clayton said, eyeing me, his fingers curled into a fist as if he was trying to suppress his anger.

"What do you want from me now, I quit drinking, took over work again, I behave like a normal human being. I can't keep up with your expectations, Clayton."

"You know what I mean, Grayson." Clayton rolled his eyes for the 10th time in a row and I fucking wished his eyeballs would get stuck back in his head.

"What the fuck are you doing at Sophie's place?" Clayton questioned. My body froze for a second at the mention of Sophie's name.

"I- I don't know." I knew exactly what I was doing there. I was searching for my home, the feeling of belonging somewhere, I was searching for something oddly beautiful that only Sophie Callister could make me feel. I was tired of my own house. It was just four walls standing without Sophie.

I felt pathetic, almost desperate. All because of the one girl.

Sophie's compact space was enough. I had nothing to complain about. I was happy to exist for once.

"She needs me. She had just lost her grandfather. Her mother won't talk to her all she has is me." I said. She needed me but I needed her more. Over time I've realised that Sophie was stronger than I thought. She was messed up, her life seemed like a bunch of pot holes, nothing was easy but that stubborn little woman walked her way through it all. I may be too kind on her now but she let me in her home after I kicked her out of mine.

"And suddenly you're her knight in shining armour?" Clayton narrowed his eyes at me and I shrugged like a dumb fuck. "Be honest with yourself, you need her."

True.

"That's not true. Shut up, for now." I seethed.

"Scarlett keeps calling me asking about you." Clayton said letting out a tired sigh.

My mother's name had become something I hated with every cell in my body.

"I want nothing to do with her right now." I said, looking out of the window at the busy street avoiding eye contact.

"You are surrounded by a bunch of problematic women , ever thought about that?" Clayton laughed, he wasn't wrong though.

"Ever thought about shutting up Clayton, you're not helping. I have to get going. "

"Sure, every time I try to talk to you, you leave. Every fucking time.
You need to accept it, you two need to stay away from each other, all you two bring is chaos on the table Grayson. You might look like a changed man but you're still fucked. You know it, I know it."

Clayton's frustrated words cut through the last string of my sanity. Without throwing him another glance I walked out of the restaurant knowing his eyes were burning holes in the back of my head. Knowing my friend would always wait for me no matter how many times I walk away.

No matter what, I would always have Clayton.

I was the problem and I knew it.

As I moved up the stairs to Sophie's apartment, each breath got heavier as my steps faltered. I felt stuck.

Sophie had told me she loved me and I decided to walk away. Day by day I was becoming more shameless. The closer I wanted to be the farther my actions took me.

I left her knowing she'd cry her eyes out behind the closed door. Knowing she needed me.

As I pushed open the door my eyes dropped to the mattress where Sophie laid curled up into herself and something dropped in my stomach.

She raised her head slightly and squinted at me before her head flopped back on the pillow.

"Sophie." I called her name out as I removed my shoes and jacket, unbuttoned my shirt and joined her. Her arms went around my torso as if it was her known territory, my fingers dug into her back as I held her to me.

"Mhm." She hummed still refusing to talk.

I knew something was wrong. The air was thick with tension and her body felt so foreign yet so mine.

"What's wrong? I murmured into her neck. She smelled divine. It was crazy how my body reacted to her touch, her presence, her smell.

"I hate myself." She whispered.

I know that feeling I wanted to tell her.

"All I do is disappoint the people I love."

You do.

I ran my fingers through her hair, comforting her as she kept speaking, surely but hesitantly. "Tell me what's wrong, I'm not good with guessing. "

Sophie fought against my grip as she tried to untangle herself from my arms, I resisted for a second before letting go, a sigh of disappointment left my mouth.

She picked up a crisp piece of paper from beside her and handed it to me.
"Don't read it out loud."

I knew it had something to do with the envelope Sarah left for her.

I nodded, my eyes zeroed on the paper and my stomach dropped.

"Your grandfather left a house in your name?" I blurted out, almost in disbelief, for a second I felt like I was losing control.

It was her Grandfather's Will.

She nodded and began to sob softly. Suddenly Sophie felt untouchable, too hard to reach. The words on the paper started to jumble in front of my eyes as each day I had spent with Sophie Callister flashed in front of me. From hating her to coming close to the word called love.

I did not love Sophie Callister. I couldn't. A part of me wanted to but I couldn't. Maybe I would never know how to.

Is this the end of nothing?

"What now?" I asked.

"I don't know." Sophie shrugged as she tried to entwine my fingers with hers, my body had gone numb. I pulled away quickly, I fucking had to.

She doesn't need you.

She's free.

She has the money now.

Why would she need you?

Why would anyone need you.

It's time to let go isn't it?

My mind had started playing tricks on me, the voices kept getting louder and louder.

"I don't want it. I don't deserve it. I'm not proud of myself. I don't deserve it." Sophie kept chanting those words like a needy prayer, a call for help. My jaw clenched and unclenched as I tried to calm my burning nerves.

"But it's yours. I want you to make a wise decision." I said , trying my best to sound sane. It felt like time was running out of my hands like sand. A wise decision? What was I saying? Why was I losing control? I couldn't falter. I couldn't show I was affected. I wanted to punch the wall beside me for saying that.

"I don't think so, life gives me what I want after it takes away everything from me." Sophie sniffled as I stayed frozen, not being able to comfort her.

Sophie snuggled into my side as I laid there. For the first time I felt my heart was on my sleeve. I could feel the toxic numbness moving up my body. Sophie's warmth had turned cold. I wanted to run at the same time I wanted to hold her tight.

Keeping the paper aside I sighed. I wanted to burn the paper, burn the memory of it from Sophie's mind. I was needy, so needy. I wanted a solution, a solid one. One, which would let her stay, stay with a man who was of no use to her, stay with a man who'd just made her life miserable.

Suddenly I was taken back to Capri, at the local church Sophie dragged me into. This time I found myself with joined hands, praying. Praying for a miracle. I felt pathetic, I didn't even pray when I lost my daughter and now I was praying for a woman that had caused nothing but trouble, the woman who was holding me like her life depended on it, like I was the anchor holding her to the seabed.

The thought of losing her was real.

I remember I'd told Sophie I loved the rain because it couldn't drown me, I would never sink. The rain couldn't hurt me, take me away. I wanted to tell her it was never about the rain. Sophie had become the rain that could drown me. I was finally conquered.

It felt like I was standing at the edge of a cliff, all I wanted was to jump but I couldn't. My mind kept reeling back old memories. So all I did was to turn to my side, pull sophie's body even closer and close my eyes.

There was a faint knock on the door.

Once.

Twice.

Thrice.

It was so faint I could barely hear it. But it was there. My eyes moved to Sophie who slept peacefully beside me. I frowned at the door.

There was another knock.

Quickly getting up I opened the door. Wondering who would be here at 4 in the morning.

I squinted at nothing until my eyes dropped to the ground and found the source of my disturbance at 4 in the morning.

A little girl staring back at me with the brightest gray eyes and a toothy grin. She was wearing a pink colour dress with strawberries all over it.

"Uh, can I help you?" Was the first thing I blurted out. I wondered where her mother was and what was she doing here.

"Hello there. I was told to come here." She said.

"Told by whom?" I asked.

"I don't know."

I nodded a bit concerned. I eyed her up and down. She only had one yellow sock on.

"Where are your parents?"

I frowned at the little girl as she smiled at me. Who would leave their child alone by someone else's door at this hour? Maybe she lived on the floor above.

"You didn't recognise me?"

My frown deepened.

"I'm Violet!" She chirped and I froze, I could feel my blood turning cold. No way.

Violet.

The same gray eyes, the same dark hair, they're longer now, her skin is glistening, her two pigtails well done.

She's perfect.

I was frozen in place, I couldn't cry, couldn't scream, couldn't even move a limb to hold her to me, I just stood there my feet glued to the floor as she walked past me into the apartment.

"Is that mum?"

Her question made something tug in my chest. Violet asked pointing at a still sleeping Sophie.

"No." I said, my jaw clenching at her words. I tried to move I couldn't.

"She's pretty."

"I know."

I wanted to hold her, hug her tightly. Ask her how she was doing? Tell her I'm sorry for everything. Beg her to forgive me. Tell her I tried my best to save her. I waited for a miracle to happen but nothing helped.

Fuck. My daughter was right in front of me and I couldn't reach her.

I watched as she walked around the place looking at everything keenly.

"This place is different from the one I used to go to It was so big and beautiful. "

She was talking about my house, goosebumps ran over me like wildfire as her words registered in my mind.

"I went there a few times but you were never there." She said, my blood had started running cold slowly.
"I tried to talk to you but you would never listen, daddy. " Violet said and my heart dropped.

Daddy?

Dad.

A father.

"She's so pretty! Can you wake her? I want to talk to her."

My legs had suddenly gained consciousness I was by Sophie as soon as those words left Violets mouth. Electricity running through my body. I wanted Sophie to meet my daughter.

"Sophie, Violet is here." I said, shaking her shoulder trying to wake her up. "Her hair is just like mine, Sophie. " Tears stung in my eyes as I tried to blink them away.

"Sophie wake up, my daughter is here." No response.

"Sophie!" I screamed this time desperately.

"Asher?"

"Asher wake up. "

"Are you okay? I'm here."

"Wake up."

I woke up with a jolt. The same electricity running through my body and my blood rushing through my veins. Fucking hell. Sweat covered my forehead, my body shaking with every breath I took.

"What happened? You kept calling my name in your dream." A concerned looking sophie whispered as she placed a kiss on my forehead and pushed my hair back.

Violets face flashed in front of my eyes. She felt so real. My daughter was right here.

"I- I don't know. What time is it?" It was all a dream after all, a goddamn dream.

Violet is not real.

Violet is dead.

"It's almost 8."

"Fuck."

.

.

Sophie.

Asher stood up quickly, his hands shaking as he straightened his shirt and quickly put on his shoes, he ran a hand through his hair before coming to an abrupt stop, his eyes zeroed on the piece of paper lying beside the mattress, his jaw clenched as something indescribable passed through his eyes that almost made my breath hitch.

"What happened? " I asked.

"Nothing. Strange dream." He said, a frown marred on his forehead.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. " His reply came immediately, cold and mean.

"Is it the mattress or the place that's attracting bad dreams, I've been getting them too a lot lately." I said completely ignoring the cold shoulder Asher was giving me.

"I don't know." He said as he quickly slipped his shoes on.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

My words caught his attention, he finally looked at me, his gaze hooded with emotions I couldn't read. He blinked, once, twice, thrice.
"I'll go get some groceries and something to eat."

"Oh Okay. I'll take a nap."

Bending down he placed a chaste kiss on my forehead and I shuddered under his touch.

That was new. Was all I could think.

With one last nod asher was out of the door.

My eyes landed on the wretched piece of paper.

My grandfather's will.

My grandfather's last message of love that he had left for me.

His way of letting me know that I was always on his mind, even when I forgot to think about him.

Something heavy settled in my chest as I frowned down at the paper.

The things people do for love. I would never understand because everything I've done turned down into ashes.

I decided to pick myself up and clean the house. With a heavy heart I pushed aside all the bad thoughts away just for once. It was my day off and a day out with Asher didn't sound so bad.

I was saving up from the past two weeks so I could take him out for lunch, nothing fancy just some delicious goodness at a small diner near by. It wasn't going to be anything near to what Asher had done for me.

3 hours had passed and I was contemplating whether I should call Asher or not. My stomach was grumbling with hunger. It was almost lunch time.

Maybe he was stuck somewhere.

Maybe he got lost in the aisle of the supermarket.

Sighing I picked up the phone and dialled his number.

It rang and rang and rang.

No answer.

I called again.

No Answer.

Something was wrong but I couldn't point my finger at it. My appetite was gone.

6 hours later, I finally accepted it. I was abandoned once again.

I knew he wasn't dead.

Asher wasn't coming back, deep down I knew it when he kissed me goodbye this morning.

Stupid, stupid Sophie.

My heart was broken into pieces yet I called again.

No Answer. Once again.

And just like that Asher Grayson was gone.

Asher: 1 Sophie: 0

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Author's note!

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Garima ❤️