When did the world decide
to hide the real tears
with fake smiles.
- Atticus.

•••
I'm very very thankful to each and everyone of you who reads and appreciate my book. I never thought so many people would like my work. Yesterday, one of my readers Book_Bonkers nominated Unsinkable for the Wattpad Fiction Award. I was totally shocked and so grateful. Just having my book's name in the comment section is a big thing for me. I wouldn't have made it to where I am today without my reader's support. I can't thank you guys enough. I love you.

•••

Somethings are too much to handle. His words were one of them. I couldn't speak. I was even scared to breathe when I looked up and saw the look on his face. His eyes full of want and lust. It has to be one of the most terrifying emotions. Lust without love.

I knew I needed to make him let go of me. I knew I couldn't stay any longer. If I did there would be no turning back from what would be coming because it's easy to lose myself into him, it's easy to just drown into something very addicting and I wanted to drown just for once.

He narrowed his eyes at me and I realized that I had zoned out. I cleared my throat and looked away as I tried to move away from him. I pressed my palm against his chest and my breath hitched as I felt his heart go wild, it was suddenly beating so hard. I looked up, I don't know what I was looking for maybe a little of something. His eyes didn't not give me much hint. It made my chest ache. I gulped and pushed at his chest, trying to move away.

You're falling into your grave, Sophie. Stop expecting anything from him.

"Don't be ridiculous. Let me go."
My hands moved to his arms, I gripped them tightly. My nails dug into his skin as I tried to remove his hands. Suddenly I was falling back. I almost screamed as I tried to gain my balance. I wavered on my heels before I stood straight. My head was still moving in circles making me feel dizzy.

"Just this one time, Callister. This is the last time I'm letting you go, remember that." He watched me, his eyes calculating something while his hands clenched and unclenched.

I looked down and gulped on the lump formed in my throat. Don't look at him again. I thought as I made my way up to my room. I had no idea what was next for me. Let's just hope nothing that was related to Asher.

After slipping my knee length nighty on. I decided to go down and find something to eat in the kitchen. As soon as stepped down the last stair my eyes darted towards the couch. She wasn't there. Panic rose inside of me as I rushed to the couch. Her shoes weren't on the floor. Where the hell did she go? She was drunk, no way in the world she would go out of the house. My legs started taking me towards the bathroom but I stopped as I saw his dark figure. It was Asher. I walked closer to the French Window. He was sitting under the Maple tree. It was freezing outside and I had no idea why he was there. The thing that creeped me out was that he was looking at me. I could sense that even though his face was completely hidden in the darkness. Chills ran down my spine as I my fingers touched the cold window glass.

So many questions were running in my head but right now I needed to get him inside the house and find Lily. I opened the French Window and almost ran upto him.

"You can't even leave me for a second, Callister. You should have waited in the room." I could sense him smirking at me. I rolled my eyes immediately.

"Excuse me? Why are you so thirsty?" Those words came out of my mouth before I could stop them. To be honest, I wasn't regretting saying that to him.

A chuckle left his mouth as I frowned at his figure.

"Get inside, Asher. You're freezing."

"I'm freezing or you are?? Go sleep Callister you don't have any say in things I do."

"I don't care. You can be a dick later to me. Right now, get inside. I'll make something for you to eat." My eyes traced the whole area looking for any signs of lily

"Where's-"

"She's gone. Now get lost before I kick you out of the house." His reply came almost immediately and I felt a sense of relief but still I was confused. I decided to not talk about her.

"We're not trying to preserve your sperms, Honey. Get in." I smiled at his figure. I was kind of eerie. I ran my hand through my hair and pulled them forward trying to warm my neck up. I was legit freezing.

"I'm telling you this one last time Sophie, leave me alone."

"Fine," I grumbled as I walked towards him and sat down beside him. I shivered violently as the cold grass prickled my skin. "This can't get worse," I whispered.

"You're so stubborn Callister."

I ignored his comment as I wrapped my arms around myself.

I pulled my knees close to my chest and laid my head on it. I turned my head to look at him. I wanted to look at him but it was too dark, I could just hear him sigh once in a while.

"What are you thinking, Callister?"
My mind wasn't filled with many thoughts. At that moment, I couldn't even think much. I was tired maybe that's why.

"Wondering what it is like to be you. "

"Believe me, it's the last thing you would want to be."

"Yes. I cannot spend my life on the couch with beers. "

"Exactly. " He sounded so cold.

"How do you do that? I chuckled.

"I don't know, Callister, I think you should shut up now.

"And I think you should get inside without arguing. It's freezing out here." He knew I wasn't going to shut up.

He Didn't reply. I heard him move thinking he was getting up to go in but no he was just making himself comfortable.

"Give me your hand." I reached for his hand. Asher immediately slapped my hand away and I made a noise at the back of my throat in protest and frowned.

"Quit trying, Callister."

"Argh, just give it to me!" I almost yelled. I wanted to pull my hair out. This man is so difficult!

"No. "

"Why not?"

"Just, No."

"I should have not asked in the first place." I quickly gripped his hand and pulled it towards me.

"What are you doing?" He sounded so surprised but he didn't try to yank them back.

"They're freezing." I look up at him and rub his hand. "Please just get in." I move closer to him so that the side of my body is against his side. Asher tensed and I gulped. God, what do I do.

"I don't want you to be sick, Asher. "

"It doesn't matter I have to be on my couch with my beers anyways. Just go and sleep it's late."

Can you stop being an arse for a second?? He was playing the passive aggressive game with me.

"We both are going inside together or staying here, I'm not going to leave you. "

"Then make yourself comfortable. I didn't ask you to be here so if you fall ill it's not my fault. "

That was the last thing I heard from him. We both didn't leave. His stubbornness and mine were on the same level. My body was trembling after a while and my nose felt stuffed. I licked my chapped lips and sighed. My eyes were so heavy with sleep. He must be tired too.

I leaned back on the trunk of the tree and closed my eyes.

"Get up, we're going in."

My eyes shot open and a smile made it's way up my face.

A second later I was running in the house. I heard him chuckle. I sighed once I stepped into the house. It was so warm.

"Go to sleep now, we're in the house."

"Can I ask you something?" I paused.

"You're going to ask me anyways, go ahead. "

"Do you love Lily?"

Asher was quiet. I saw him open the cabinet and take out a bottle filled with clear liquid. His long fingers were curled around the glass bottle, my eyes travelled down, he was so tall, I never thought anybody could look that amazing in just simply
dress- pants. That was new. He drew out a slender glass and poured some of the liquid.

"No."

"Do you love Violet?" I don't remember how long I stood there in complete silence.

"Sophie, turn around and go straight up to your room. Do not turn around. Don't say a word just leave."

His eyes met mine and they were livid. His grip tightened on the glass, it was going to crumble anytimin his hand. My eyes met his again they held a warning for me. I was suddenly so alarmed, I turned around and rushed up the stairs as I opened my door I heard something crash. Do go down, don't go down. And I didn't. I slammed my door shut and immediately went to sleep on the couch like I didn't hear the glass breaking.

Whoever Violet was, she hurt him. He turned Asher Grayson into a beast. I need to find her.

When I woke up the first thing that came to my mind was Asher. I remember Asher told me that he couldn't figure me out, I felt the same towards him. I needed to know who Violet was. If his lover was hiding out there somewhere I needed to find her.

I rubbed my eyes and exhaled. Just thinking about him loving someone else made my chest feel heavy. You're not supposed to feel like that Sophie, I reminded myself. It was getting hard day by day to get him out of my system.

I got out of the couch and sauntered towards the bathroom. It was a Sunday. I was free for the whole day. I made my schedule up in my mind most of it was ways to not annoy or piss off Asher. I've had enough of his hot headedness.

No, you just don't want to be kicked out.

I rolled my eyes as that thought invaded my mind taking away the last bit of peace in my head. I shook my before I stripped down to nothing and I stepped into the shower.

A few minutes later, I was done. I slipped on a lilac cold cut dress. I brushed my hair and let them fall freely down my shoulders. It's been a while since I've taken care of myself. I thought as I looked at myself for one last time.

When I reached the last step I expected seeing broken furniture and glass on the floor but there was nothing. The place was absolutely clean like what I heard last night was nothing but my ears ringing.

It was a relief to not find Asher on the floor.

"Hey," I almost jumped out of my skin as I heard that voice. I looked to my right and my eyes fell on him. He was looking breathtaking in the baby blue shirt which looked like it was just made to fit him, it was perfect. The first few buttons were undone. He paired it with blue denims. I couldn't stop looking at him. His hair were wet like he just came out of the shower.

"You've been standing there for a while now. "

"Oh..." I didn't know what to say. I was daydreaming and ogling at him. . "I'm sorry I was just thinking about something."

Asher didn't reply, he had a coffee mug in his hand. "I made some coffee for you."

To say I was completely and utterly shocked would be an understatement.

"You made coffee for me?" I stared at him completely dumbfounded.

"Yes, with a ton of sugar. The way you like it." He brought his mug to his lips and took a sip of his coffee before his eyes moved to meet mine. He placed the mug on the table in front of him. His eyes were so dreamy today, they looked so calm not hollow. His eyes moved over my body shamelessly and I felt my spine go stiff. Why was he so calm today?

"Are you okay?" I blurted my thoughts out.

He raised an eyebrow at me but didn't say anything.

I shrugged my shoulders as I walked to the kitchen. What was wrong with him? Is he for real. I thought to myself as I picked up my coffee and took a sip. It was perfect. How did he know how I liked my coffee?

I smiled to myself as I walked out, I rounded the centre table and sat beside Asher I didn't forget to maintain a good distance between us. Just making sure I had enough time and space to run if he tried to do something funny. I internally face palmed. What the fuck Sophie??

My eyes went to him, he looked relaxed as his eyes moved over the phone screen. He took small sips once in a while and I was so lost I didn't realise that my coffee was turning cold. To be honest, I didn't actually care. Asher being so composed wasn't a sight I saw everyday. He ran a hand through his dark hair and sighed, his shoulders dropped as he leaned back. I wish he always stay like this.

"You look a little unsettled, Callister." His eyes racked over my body and settled on my face.

"Uh..no." I blushed red and let my hair curtain my face. Dammit.

I took a long sip of my now cold coffee and got up. I have no idea what got into. I moved closer to Asher, he looked amused. His eyes stayed on mine. I was hovering over him by now.

Why are you looking at me like that, did I do something wrong? His voice was so playful.

"No, you didn't." My hand moved forward and I threaded my fingers through his hair. He didn't say a anything. Words can't explain how I felt when I touched him. If I could write a poetry for how his soft hair felt against my palm it would never end. I Asher closed his eyes as if he was enjoying it, taking in the feels of my hand until it was all gone. His muscles relaxed. He was running his thumb on the rim of his mug.  I looked down and smiled at him. I hope he stay just the way you are today. I don't like the storm anyways. "It's good to see you like this."

His hand reached towards mine and his fingers curled around my wrist. He looked down at my palm. His fingers traced my palm and I almost hissed, I wanted to sit down but I was still hovering over him. In one swift motion, he interlaced our fingers and squeezed my hand, "does it hurt?"

I shook my hand, "Not really." He was talking about when my hand got burned. They were fine now.

I frown was marred on his face when I looked up. "What's wrong?" I immediately questioned him out of curiousity.

"Your hands." Came his reply he sounded so conflicted.

"What about them?"

"I've never held such rough hands before, especially of a woman."

I remember how everything was so nice just a second ago, I remember how my ears started ringing as soon as those words left his mouth. I never thought he would notice my hands. If today is my last day ever in his house then I hope my secrets are not coming out, I thought. 

I stood their looking at my hands, I couldn't move neither Asher did. His eyes were trained on my palms, there were so many lines and cuts, so many scars some were fading away some were still their, my nails were uneven. I never really cared about my hands until now. Now they were cradled in his perfect ones and I just wanted to pull away.

"I-Uh...Asher-"

Before I could say anything the door bell chimed I immediately yanked my hand away from his hold.

I won't let him know anything. I won't. I need to stay here.

I chanted this thought as a prayer as I ran towards the door and yanked it open.

Shout out to all the housewives and maids out there!!

If you see your mum working a lot in the kitchen or doing a lot of stuff in the house I want you to go to her and see her hands, you'll see the imprints left behind from all the work she did and that makes me respect them so so much.

I hope you like this chapter. It wasn't supposed to end like this but I'm glad it did, I CANNOT WAIT TO UPDATE THE NEXT CHAPTER. I'm so excited for it!!

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Garima 🌺