Do say in comments if any error is found. Check out my other book "The Link". And also, I don't plan on dropping this book, since rarely there is some connection to our fandom and also, I never use their name in this book.

Happy Valentine's Day In Advance !! ❤️💫

The sun was slowly setting in while playing peek a boo with the earth. The birds chirping was dying down leaving space for the evening traffic to overpower their volume. There were slight drizzles mirroring the doubts and mindset of the man seated inside a café.

Mugil, he was no different from the weather. He was restless. He wasn’t sure about when he is going to burst out just like how uncertain it would be to say about the drizzle changing into rain.

He wasn’t sure if this decision of him was right. His brain and heart didn’t guide him to the same part. The internal struggle he had to cross before taking this decision is something that only he could understand.

Yes, he was meeting her after years. For someone who hears, it is casual, but for him in no way it was that easily done as told especially owing to his introvert nature and temper issues. He sat thinking what if she didn’t show up or showed attitude. He sat thinking various what ifs until he felt the door open to show him her face.

The face that he missed seeing in years. The face he yearned to see at least for once. The face that kept him alive. The face that made him forget all the pain. It was her face. She was the one, whom he once knew as ‘His Girl’.

Being without her was never an easy task. It was neither his choice nor her choice, it wasn’t even their choice. It was the play of situation and time. He did not know whom to blame back then. All he wanted to do was, take her into his arms and never leave her even for a second. When he left to his dream place for his dream job soon after that rift, he thought it was going to be alright soon. He considered that as one of their casual fights. But the reality was far different from what he thought.

He waited for her to call. The wait of hours turned into days, days into months and months into more than 3 years. But he never received the call that he wished to.

That was when he felt that what they had was no more a rift but a huge break.

அவள் சென்ற தருணம் உணர்ந்தேன்
வாழ்வின் சுவாசம் சென்றது என்று

அவளை பிரிந்த கனம் கூறியது
மீட்க இயலா வைரம் கையை விட்டுச் சென்றது என்று

கேட்க அவள் குரல் இல்லை என்று அறிந்தேன்
கேட்பதையே வெறுக்கும் நிலை அடைந்தேன்

என்னை நான் தொலைக்க அவள் கண்கள் இல்லை
முதல் முறையாக பாதுகாப்பின்றி திகைத்தேன்

தாயாய் இருந்து சேயாய் என்னை பார்த்தாள்
இன்று தாயை தொலைத்த சேயாய் நின்றேன்

(The moment she left coincided the moment my breath left me.

It wasn't losing just a piece of my life, it was about losing a precious gem.

As soon I realised I could no more hear her voice, I was no more interested in hearing.

When I realised I could no longer lose myself in her eyes, I feared for my safety.

She was a mother who saw me as her child, and now I am after losing my mother.)

A pair of hands being shaken in front of him brought Mugil back to the reality.

Varsha, a girl of practical and realistic mind. She had her own battles about her decision to meet him, yet she managed to cover it up and aced a perfect carefree and confident image.

The moment she decided to mask was when she realised that they grew to be soo different from the last time they met. Varsha wasn’t a person, who wanted to put up a fake façade in front of her loved ones to make them happy. She was that person, who would be ready to express all kind of emotions including to their vulnerable side to the person they love and trust.

Yes, they aren’t the same, but still the newly found fact made her feel surprised. Though what she has now keeps her content, she very well knew how much she missed him.

After being used to his pampering and cuddling nature, being in a world without that was quite tedious, yet there was an unknown sting of hope that made her to stick onto the life. She waited for him to reach out her. She waited for soo long. But that long just kept becoming longer.

தென்றல் தீண்டிய தருணம்
உன் தீண்டலை நினைவூட்டின

சாரல் என்னை தன்னுள் போர்த்திய சமயம்
உனது கைக்கூண்டில் நான் இருந்ததை கண்முன் நிறுத்தியது

சூரியனால் என் தேகம் சுட்ட சமயம்
நீ அணுகையில் சிவக்கும் என் கண்ணத்தை ஏக்கத்துடன் வருடினேன்

மார்கழி பனி என்னை வாட்டுகையில்
உன் அணைப்பில் நான் காணும் வெப்பத்தை நாடினேன்

இதழ்கள் சண்டையின்போது பரிமாறும்
காதலை மீண்டும் பெற வேண்டினேன்

(The wind's touch reminded me of yours.

The moment I was engulfed by rain, I saw myself being caged in your arms.

When sun made my skin feel the heat, my hands touched my cheeks, which used to heat with blush on your proximity.

When I felt shivering in cold, I yearned for the warmth in your embrace.

I wished to get back the love that was shared during the times our lips fought with each other.)

“Hi Mugil. Erm how are you?”

“I am good Varsha. Nee?”

“Hmm yah, great.”

“Hmm”

There was a pregnant silence. Both were not ready to break it. That wasn’t a silence that would give various answers or make a person clearer, but that was the silence that has the capacity to make a strong person break. It was the one, that can give rise to much more questions. That was the one which is much needed yet feels soo uncomfortable.

Thanks to the waiter, the long impending breaking the ice moment was done.

“Your order please.” Brought them out of the trance.

“Coffee for him” “Chocolate thick shake for her” they both said in unison.

The waiter nodded with a bit of confusion and left the place.

“Nyaabagam irukka innum?” he voiced out unable to hold his curiosity.

“Naanum kekalame athe kelvi ah” she replied.

“Hmmm correct than.”

Not giving them enough space to dwell upon their overwhelming emotions, their order was placed in front of them.

“Annaikku nee poiruka koodathu Varsha.” Mugil said with his voice laced with disappointment. “Atleast after days aachu you should have called me, you had my foreign number.”

“Kooptrakanum than. Infact I should have stopped you from leaving even. But nee kooda pannirukalame, nee annaikku poga vidama irunthrukalame. Y did you expect me to that?” she defended herself.

“Yena annaiku start pannathu nee, naan illa. Atha nyaabagathula vachiko. And soon I left to a new place, illana you know me. Eppavum, oru sandai ku apram naan than vanthruken, eppavum.”

“Idhu ippo vendam Mugil. Let’s stop it here. Hanumar vaal mathiri ithu neendukitte pogum.”

Mugil gave an understanding nod to her.

Varsha’s mind was filled with the past. The moment he left to abroad without trying to reach her even once pierced her heart. She tried a lot to move on, but ended up being futile each time. Whichever task she took, in some way or the other it reminded him of her. There were n number of days, where she would stare at his contact while her fingers used to hover over the call button. Something stopped her from pressing that all the day, maybe that was a fear of rejection or fear of ending up fighting again.
That fear has totally changed her. Not only her but her situations too. Her answers were affirmative when her parents took words or marriage in front of her. She felt stranded on a lonely desert.

She let out a sad chuckle thinking of her present life. Soon that chuckle turned into a tear.

All the while, Mugil sat seeing the window. His mind was racing. He wanted to do things that would not be morally right for them. He saw how the drizzles slowly turned into a shower.

Moving on was soo tough for him. Even after taking the decision, he felt that to be tough. Him living his dream and visiting various places made him remember her. She always wanted him to live his dream, with her near to him. He was indeed living his dream but she wasn’t even somewhere closer to him.

In a try of controlling her tears, her mind kept asking just one thing,
'Appove pesa try pannirukanumo naan?'

She very well knew, what she now had due to destiny’s play did not bring any heartbreak or deep sadness to her, but she could help but ponder over the thought of what would have happened if they got back together back then itself.
For the first time in the evening, she raised her eyes to meet his eyes. She still could read it. She knew what was running in his mind. Afterall, it was the same thoughts being mirrored in his mind too.
Mugil wanted to divert themselves. Regretting or blaming each other wasn’t going to help them.

“Apram, what is he saying?” he asked with a forced smile.

“Haan he, we are right now planning and preparing everything. He occasionally asks about you too, theriyum Mugil na yaaru, who he was to me nu.”

“Hmmm. Okay, I think it’s time to leave, let’s meet someother day.” Mugil finally brough himself to say.

“Yes, enakkum meeting irukku.”

“Okay then, haan yes, here is the card.”

- Mugil
Weds
Chandani -

Varsha traced the words in the card. She felt her eyes being moistened.

“Varsha, don’t mistake me. But I think, it would be easy if you don’t come. Intha card, Chandani wanted to invite you. But if she insists and you like, nee marriage ku apram Bhoomi yoda veetuku vaa.”

“Yah, I know how that feels. Sure, neeyum oru naal Chandani yoda visit us. Formality ku sollala.”

“Yah okay.”

With that they both slowly headed out of the café. Bidding a silent bye they both turned each side to move to their own cars.

“Varsha.” Mugil called her, on seeing him she realised his motive. Her legs started to walk towards him on its own. She slowly hugged him.

Being in his arms still felt safe but she knew it would no more give the feel of ‘home’.

They parted from the hug and none of them had the gut to look into each other’s eyes.

By now the sky was clear with moon slowly rising up behind the clouds giving an ethereal look, while the rain drops fell on the land chilling the place.

முகிலில் இருந்து பிரிந்த
வர்ஷமானது பூமியை குளிர
செய்தது.

வர்ஷத்தை தொலைத்த முகிலானது
சந்திர ஒளியில் ஜொலித்தது.

(The raindrop separated from the cloud to chill the earth.

The cloud shined with moonlight after losing the raindrop.)

~ The End ~