32) Not Enough
If there is any stressful situation most people agree on, it would have to be sitting next to an unconscious family member as you awaited the news of their fate. It's even worse when you're the one responsible for what happened. So many thoughts race through your head, thinking of what you could have done differently, why it happened, and all the terrible things you think about yourself out of guilt. In moments like this, it's easy to not talk to people. The thoughts in your head keep your mind busy and distract you from facing the possible truth that the one you love most will be lost.
Peter never slept through night, it was nearly impossible for him to leave May's side. The only time he had to was went he helped the paramedics hoist her into the ambulance in costume, before they rushed her to New York Hospital Queens. Peter followed the ambulance from above, just in case there was more trouble in the streets that would endanger the vehicle. When it arrived at the hospital, Peter changed back into his clothes and rushed in to find May. At one point he was able to see her down a long hallway, with half a dozen ER nurses or doctors around her trying to revive her. He tried to get up along side her, but a few nurses and security guards held him back saying that he couldn't be with her during the procedure.
I take back what I said before, the worse feeling is when you're waiting for the doctors to give you the news of whether your loved one is alive or no longer with you. He sat alone in the corner of the waiting room, frantically bouncing his leg from all the anxiety bottling up inside him. he ran his fingers along his forehead and into his curled hair, trying to relieve the pressure in his head from thinking too much. Until finally the doctor came out to him, and Peter didn't waste a second asking how May was.
The doctor said that May still had a heartbeat, but was still unconscious due to a large piece of asphalt falling on the roof of her car, causing it to collapse on her head and knocking her out. Peter thanked the doctor for the news, but the all to familiar lump in his throat was not remedied by it. It lingered throughout the night, from the moment the doctor came out to see him, to the moment he walked into May's room. She laid on the bed naturally, her arms resting along the sides of her body. One of them jutting out a little from Peter reaching for it occasionally. Her face was colorless, apart from a large cut on the side of her head where the roof hit her. The cut was littered with stitches and bandages, hoping to close it within a period of weeks.
Peter, like many times throughout the night, held his aunt's hand with both his hands, whispering little comments to himself. "I promised myself..." he sobbed, "time and time again, that I wouldn't let anybody get hurt if I could prevent it. Especially you..." He shivered a little, feeling his spirit starting to crumble. "And I did everything you of asked of me..." He sniffled his nose clear, trying to find the strength to confess his guilt. "I went out and found a job..., I let you know where I was and when I was going to be home... I tried to make you proud." His heart sank deep, his insides caving in and collapsing. His eyes watered once more, and his mouth lined into an ugly frown. "I'm sorry...," sniffle, "I'm so sorry May." He gripped her hand once more and dropped his head on her shoulder, sobbing harder than he had all night. He stayed crying over her for at least a minute or two, wishing she that this never had happened.
*knock-knock-knock*
The sound of three knocks at the door caught his attention. He didn't bother answering, thinking it was a nurse making his or her rounds, so he remained seated next to May. He lifted his head from her shoulder to make things look normal, wiping away the tears on his face.
*knock-knock*
Two more knocks, and Peter narrowed his eyes. He pushed off his knees and stood, starting his approach to the door. He kept his eyes on May the entire time he rounded the bed, making him feel so helpless. He gave a quick sniffle before he shifted his attention to the door. He extended his hand to the handle, but the door started opening before he was able to touch it. His eyes shot up, watching the door swing inside the room as a male figure appeared from behind.
Dressed in a dark gray workout shirt with a black blazer, Tony Stark walked in with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. Peter froze as his mentor's eyes met him. He didn't quite know how to react. Tony gave a reluctant smile to boy, feeling equally unsure of what to do. He could tell Peter was a bit unprepared for his visit. He casually nodded his head and gave a quick "hey kid" a few seconds after entering the room.
Peter gave a silent nod and turned back to his unconscious aunt. With Tony in the room, it was going to be difficult to maintain a normal persona. He rounded the bed once more and plopped back down in his seat. Tony slowly followed, watching his apprentice in pity as he sat down next to his aunt. When he looked at May, he remembered this radiant woman he met at the Parker apartment when he first came to recruit the web-slinger. Now, she looked like she was at a loss of emotion, loss of soul..., loss of life.
The billionaire pressed his lips into a sharp line, sighing through his nose at the sight before him. "I'm sorry for what happened, Pete. Really" he consoled the somber teen, trying to bring some much-needed emotional balance to the room. "I uh... brought flowers. I wasn't sure what type she'd like, so I just went with gerberas." He placed the assortment of red, yellow, and pink daisies on a small table near the opposite side of May's bed.
Peter didn't pay attention to the flowers, and he kept his eyes glued to May's expressionless face while he rubbed his thumb over her cold hand. Tony noticed, and reached behind his head, itching away the unsettling feeling of trying to console someone. He shuffled to the front of the bed, thinking of what to say next. "In my opinion, they're out of season, but I think they complement her" he continued in his usual cocky business charisma. "And uh... Happy's on his way with a stuffed bear. Personally, I think it's a little too much, but Happy is a sentimental guy when it comes t..."
"It's fine" Peter finally said, rather bluntly. Tony stopped speaking, feeling the sting of Peter's words pierce his chest. He looked down, desperately trying to find something to say after such a passive statement. He reached for his left arm, rubbing and nursing it in silence before sitting in a chair at the front of the bed, moaning an exhausted 'okay' as he lowered himself.
A few minutes of silence passed, and the awkwardness was starting to get extremely annoying to Peter, given Tony's habit of never staying silent for very long. He couldn't take it anymore and finally broke the silence. "Do think she'll make it?"
Tony gave a hesitant look to Peter, who was still not looking away from his aunt. "I don't know kid. I hope she does" he replied, waiting for Peter to react in some way.
"But what if she doesn't," Peter quivered, turning his head to face Tony. "How can I live with myself knowing I let this happen?"
Tony sighed through his nose once more, trying to find the right words to make the kid see things more positive. "I guess by accepting what happened." Peter's face remained the same, expecting something a bit more dramatic, and not as blunt and quick as Stark had made it sound. "I know, it doesn't sound like the easiest thing to do Pete, but it's the best thing you can do to start."
"I'm guessing that you've done plenty of that, given your quick opinion on the matter" Peter commented, turning his head back to May. Tony stood from his spot and wandered over to Peter. "The demons are never gone kid. I just try to focus on the big picture ahead, no matter how much sleep I lose over it." He slumped into the spot next to Peter, his eyes glancing over May's body as he did.
"I just feel like Spider-Man is ruining my life, Mr. Stark. Everywhere I go, I somehow manage to ruin somebody's life. More people are finding out my secret, and I fear that they'll get hurt... because of what I do."
"Who else knows now?" Stark cut-in.
"Just one person, a friend named Michelle."
"A friend? A girl?!" Stark gasped, "are you two like..." he sputtered at the end.
"No, uh" Peter shook his head, "ugh... I don't know, it complicated."
"Do you care about her?"
"Yeah, of course I do. She's one of the best people I've ever met."
"Then you do the best you can to keep her safe, even if she doesn't share the same feelings you have for her."
Peter was completely torn, feeling the strain of his responsibilities pulling him apart. He really liked Michelle and hoped that their small moment at the lake wasn't the peak of their relationship. He remembered how concerned he felt when the first explosion went off and told her to get to safety. In his mind, maybe that meant he truly did care for her, and it wasn't just a crush or some new attraction to her. On the other hand, he didn't want May to go either, especially in a similar way that Ben did. She was the woman that raised him, made sure he was taken care of when all the bullies picked on him through the middle school years, or made sure he did his homework instead of watching countless YouTube videos about the Avengers. Yes, at the time it seemed trivial and not-so-life changing, but those little things were all that Peter could think of, in these moments where he could lose her at any second.
"I once told you..." Peter said after a few seconds of silence, "when you can do the things that I can, but you don't, and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you." Tony leaned forward, remembering his words vividly. "What if that's not enough to save her? What if it's not enough to keep May alive? What if it's not enough to continue being Spider-Man?"
Tony slapped his hand on Peter's shoulder, comforting him not to think so doubtful. Peter internally rolled his eyes at the gesture and stood to leave the room. He made an excuse that he needed to use the bathroom, and walked out of the room, leaving Stark silent. In the hallway, Peter leaned against the wall, dragging his fingers down his face. To a degree, he was considering giving up entirely. The suit, the web-shooters, the responsibility, everything. And if he were honest with himself, he would have been alright with it, had it not been for the annoying vibrations from his phone preventing him to think straight.
Two quick buzzes coming every two seconds against his thigh, and Peter pulled it out to turn off the vibration. But when he looked at the lock-screen, it was flooded with text notifications from Felicia with messages that said to call her immediately, and also mentioned, to his shock, Michelle.
He quickly dialed Felicia, who picked up after one ring.
"Thank God you got back quickly" Felica said, almost in a whisper. The background noise of her call was filled with loud music and many people talking over each other.
"What's up, and why did you mention Michelle?"
"Jason escaped the park, and went back to the house."
"House?" he snorted, "What house?"
"Maybe if you picked up your phone once in a while, maybe you'd know" the young cat-burglar scolded "The point is, he took Michelle."
"What!!??" Peter felt every sense in his body spring into action, as if his entire life was meant for a moment like this.
"I followed them, and their here. So is Tombstone."
Peter's head was racing, the girl he liked was now in danger, by whatever psychotic plan the two gangsters had for her. He had to get her back, or else she would probably share the same fate May was facing. That thought alone scared Peter the most, the fact that he would lose two people he cared about in one night. In the back of his mind, he also knew that it would be hard leaving May to whatever fate God had in mind for her, but that was not enough to sway Peter from avoiding his responsibilities to protect those that he cares about.
"I'm at the hospital right now, I don't know if I can get there in time" he explained to his partner.
"I can't take them on alone, Spider."
"Yes, you can," Peter stressed with every bit of importance he had left in his web-swinging career. "You're the most resourceful person I know. Get in there and cause some trouble, make a distraction. Anything to pro-long them from doing anything to her. I'm counting on you Cat."
"I'll see what I can do, but I can't guarantee that it'll work."
"Just do your best, that will hopefully be enough."
"Gee, thanks for the confidence" she said before hanging up. Peter turned back to the room to grab his backpack, only to find Tony standing in the doorway. The look on his face implied that he had heard everything he said on the phone. "I uh..." Peter mumbled, Tony's lips pulling into a small smile as Peter thought of a way to explain himself.
"It's okay, kid. We all have our doubts. It just takes the right people to show us the way." He placed his hand over Peter's shoulder again, guiding him back into May's room. "Need any help?" he quickly asked, earning a quick 'no' from Peter.
"This is something I gotta face, for May. For Michelle. For my Uncle Ben. For myself."
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A/N- We're back, and getting quite emotional. IDK, I started really detailed and finished lazily. I hope you guys don't mind. It was hard trying to keep my goals aligned for this one. Still, I hope you guys liked Chapter 32.
And now, Tony Stark makes his first appearance. I was thinking of a couple different people to give the words of wisdom, such as: Happy, Frank, even Clare from the Netflix universe. Ultimately, I thought it fit better if I put Tony in.
Hope you guys enjoyed reading this chapter. Leave a vote if you did, and don't forget to express your thoughts in the comments.
New chapter in two weeks. Until next time, BYE!!!
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