The day of Yoongi's funeral had come and gone quicker than the news of his death, leaving Jimin in an even worse state than he normally had been in. He kept denying that the person he loved was gone, he kept denying the cold-hard truth that Yoongi wouldn't be returning to him ever again. He partially blamed himself for the loss of Yoongi, because if he only told the ravenette he didn't want him to leave, Yoongi would've still been alive and probably wrapped up in blankets while cuddling the brunette. Life would've been great, if only he told Yoongi not to take the job offering.

To say that Jimin was a mess would be an understatement in everything that had been going on. Not only had he put the full blame on himself for the loss of his loved one, but he was also attacking himself for actually allowing himself to let his guard down and let someone in, he was upset that he allowed himself to fall in love with someone. If only he had continued being the cold-hearted person he showed to Yoongi for their first few meetings, he would've, just so the ravenette would still have his life today. He could've cared less about getting hurt, as long as the older boy was alive and well.

Sadly, what happened was set in stone and there was no way for Jimin - or anyone for that matter - to bring back Yoong and change things so there could've been a better outcome. Nobody wanted to accept the fact that it was Yoongi's time, that he was meant to get on the plane. Everything happens for a reason, per say, and everything after that is caused by the butterfly effect.

Jimin was meant to break into the music store that one night, because it lead him to meet the love of his life. Even though their love couldn't last as long and because they didn't get a happy ending, doesn't meant that what happened was negative. Jimin met Yoongi to finally break free from his shell, forget the past and fall in love for the first time in his life. If he never broke into that music store, none of that would've ever happened.

"Hey Jimin, are you coming with us to Seokjin's and Namjoon's play?" The redhead from the bookstore popped her head inside the brunette's bedroom. Jimin simply shook his head, his gaze focused on the item in his hand. Kaesi sighed, a frown etching its way onto her lips. "Okay, but call us if you need anything."

And that was that. Every now and then, one of the brunette's friends would stop by and ask him how he was - since they all had a spare key - and he would always be in the same position every time. Whenever someone walked into his room, they would find him laying on his bed, staring down at the last picture he had ever taken with Yoongi. It was one of his favorite pictures of them together, something he will never forget, because it was the last date they ever want on together.

"I miss you hyung," the brunette brought the picture up to his lips and placed a small kiss on it where Yoongi was at. "I'm going to come visit you today, okay? It's been a little while and I have something that I want to give to you."

The brunette gathered some strength in himself and stood up from his bed, padding his way over to his closet. He threw on one of the ravenette's favorite sweatshirts and a pair of ripped jeans before making his way out of his room and to the living room. He picked up the bag off of the couch and headed out of the door, closing and locking it behind him. It had been almost three weeks since he left the apartment, so he was partially excited to get out and see the world around him - although it would've been better if Yoongi was there with him.

Jimin's lips curved into a small smile at the thought before furiously shaking his head and making his way down the stairwell. As he reached the lobby, he was greeted with a very surprised Jiyeon.

"Jimin dear, where are you going? It's raining pretty badly out," the old lady called out to the brunette, who simply ignored her words and continued his way out of the complex doors. 

Once he was outside, he flipped the hoodie up so it was covering his head as he made his way to his destination. It was going to be a twenty minute walk before he got there, and he didn't want to be completely soaked when he arrived. Sighing aloud, the brunette clutched the bag close to his chest as he began walking down the street, heading towards his destination.

+ +

After a twenty-five minute walk, the brunette reached his destination. He let out a heavy sigh before walking through the opened gates. The aura of the place was saddening, and almost brought the brunette to tears as soon as he entered. But he had to stay strong, at least, until he got to where he needed to be. 

Jimin walked amongst the large, grey rocks, frown plastered on his lips as his gaze was focused ahead, focused on the one that belonged to the love of his life. He could already feel the tears stinging at his eyes, yet he blinked them away. He didn't want to cry, not just yet anyway. 

As the brunette approached the tombstone, he noticed a few things that recently been set out there. There was a small piano keychain that lay right in the middle of the tombstone. The sight alone was enough to break the brunette's heart even more than it had already been - that is, if his heart had any broken pieces left to spare.

"Hi hyung," the brunette kneeled down into the muddy grass, yet he didn't care. He placed the bag against the tombstone before running his hand over Yoongi's name. "I really miss you, life really sucks without your snarky remarks and warm hugs."

Jimin took in a deep breath, not wanting to cry just yet. He had to keep it in, just for a little bit longer. "How are you doing, hyung? I hope you're doing okay where you are, I don't know what I would do if you weren't okay whenever you are." He placed his hand directly onto the ravenette's name, a sad smile etching its way onto his lips.

"Do you remember how Hoseok and Kaesi were always arguing? It turns out they liked each other the entire time," the brunette let out a small chuckle. "And Seokjin hyung got to direct his own play, which is going on right now. I'd rather be here with you than watch it, though."

There was a silence after that, the only sound being of the rain pattering against the grass and the brunette's unsteady breathing. He was so close to breaking down right there, but he couldn't. Taking another deep breath, the brunette closed his eyes as he leaned his forehead against the tombstone.

"I wish I could've convinced you to stay with me, then I wouldn't have to be talking to you like this," the brunette's hands balled up into fists, his teeth clenching. A lump formed in his throat from holding in the tears, but he didn't want to let them out. He wanted to be strong in front of his hyung, but it was getting harder every second he kneeled in front of his tombstone. "I should've been selfish and told you to stay with me. Or I should've just ignored you from the beginning. At least you'd still be alive then."

Jimin choked out a sob as he reopened his eyes, tears immediately rushing down his cheeks. He let out a sob or two before sensing a presence near him. He looked up, and through his blurry vision, he could see the what looked like Yoongi, smiling at him widely. He blinked a few times to see if his mind was playing tricks on him and when he reopened them, the ravenette was nowhere to be seen.

"Goddammit! Why'd you have to leave me?" The brunette screamed out, tears continuing to pour from his eyes. He was letting out uncontrollable sobs as he leaned his forehead against the rock once again. "I love you, you idiot! Why'd you have to leave me?"

And there, the brunette sat, letting all of the emotions he held in, out. He cried until the tears disappeared and the only thing running down his cheeks were raindrops. He yelled and screamed until his voice was no more, he used the little strength he had to get out all of the emotions that he hadn't shone since the day he found about the ravenette's death.

"Jimin, don't be like this, please," a familiar voice spoke to the lifeless-looking brunette. "I may not be with you anymore but it still hurts me to see you in pain like this."

Jimin picked his head up and looked around, not seeing the owner of the voice anywhere. Of course I can't, he's gone, the brunette thought to himself. I must be going crazy or something. He shook off the thought and continued to wallow in his pain.

"Jiminie, I love you so much and I don't regret meeting you that day, it was the best day of my life because I got to meet the person of my dreams. I may be gone now, but I don't regret spending the last six months with you. I wouldn't change it for anything," the ravenette's voice seemed to speak up once again. "I have to go now but know that I'm always with you, watching over you. And whenever you kiss that picture of us, I'm kissing it right back. I'm always with you, whether you know it or not. I have to go now, but remember that I will always love you, Jiminie. Nothing will ever change that."

A few moments afterwards, and there was nothing except the constant sound of rain falling into the muddy grass. The brunette wanted to sob again, but his voice wouldn't allow it. He wanted to cry, but there were no tears left in his eyes. Everything was empty, just like the brunette. He was empty, he was broken and hurt; he was feeling heartbreak on a whole different level. Especially since he just heard the voice of the person he loved, not too long ago.

Come on, Jimin, you can't be like this anymore. Yoongi said he's always gonna be with you, watching over you. You have to do your best for him now, you have to make sure Yoongi hyung is happy, the brunette told himself, to try and gain some confidence and strength in him. It wasn't much, but the brunette was able to feel a little bit more confident. He slowly stood up from the ground and picked up the bag, taking out the item inside,

Jimin smiled down at the item in his hand before placing it down against the tombstone. While he was leaning down, he pressed his lips to the tombstone, letting them linger for a few seconds before pulling away and standing up once again. He looked at the tombstone, smiled sadly at it, then turned around to leave. He had the strength from the person he loved in him, and that was enough to give him a little bit of hope for the future.

Although Jimin was always going to be heartbroken over the loss of the person he loved, he knew the older boy was always going to be with him. When he cried, when he smiled, when he laughed, Yoongi was always going to be there to witness it. He may have not have been there in the way he wanted, but he was always there. And he never planned on leaving.

As Jimin disappeared from sight, Yoongi appeared next to his tombstone and looked at what the brunette left for him. The ravenette's lips curved upwards at the sight, tears falling down his cheeks.

The item Jimin left for Yoongi was full of colors, but the colors were being washed away in the rain. The canvas and sketch itself were still perfectly fine, but the mix of colors were washing away, just like how Yoongi managed to wash away from existence. 

It was the sketch Jimin drew of Yoongi.

+ note ; i've never cried so hard for my own fanfic but this has me in tears really badly. this was such a nice story to write and i hate to end it, but it had to be done. im so emotional though like i loved this story so much and the ending hurts and im just sitting here crying

i will accept hugs rn, everyone lets hug bc i think we all deserve one

( OH AND VOTE BELOW FOR A NEW FANFIC FROM KYA )

comment ships down here ( i will not do jikook, vhope or yoonseok unless you guys really want it that badly. or any jin/namjoon ship that isn't namjin )