In honor of American Thanksgiving tomorrow, I decided to write down the story of the holiday! 

I'm bored, ok? 

And I actually worked on this >:V 

....for like 5 minutes 

So, uh yeah. Enjoy 

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   SO, in the early 1600s, a lot of people were like, "yo, dude, we can't practice our religion here in England freely, this sucks!" And THEN, they realized, "hey, we could just like, move, right? Go to the absolute treasure that is Ohio? 

....I'm just kidding they didn't know about Ohio. But as someone who's been to Ohio too many times, I can confirm that there's legit nothing there. 

   Anyway

   The British East India Company, which as you can tell, shows up a lot when you start talking about the history of British Colonies, was like, "Well, hey! We can send you over, just like the Jamestown peeps! BUT, you have to settle within a boundary. Go to far north or south, and we can't help you, sorry fam."

   And the pilgrims were like, "yeah, yeah! We can settle along the Hudson River, in Northern Virginia!" 

   "AUTOBOTS, ROLL OUT!" 

   Annnnnnd there they went. 

   They got on a ship called the Mayflower, and along the journey, all the men got together and created the Mayflower Compact, which basically said they were still British Citizens (tm) and they were still gonna follow all the laws like good citizens (tm) 

   Yeahhhh, they sailed wAY too far. Instead of Virginia, they landed way up in Massachusetts. They were all on their own (dUN DUN DUN) 

   Oh dang, they don't know how to do anything! 

   But don't fear, this super cool Native named Squanto put on his sunglasses and was like, "I can help you! We can be friends!"

   SO, the Wampanoag tribe and the Pilgrims became friends, and started helping each other out! In 1621, they celebrated their first successful harvest by having a 3 day celebration, complete with games, stories, and lots o' food. 

   ....and then everyone kind of forgot about it. 

   There was a lot of people later, after the US yeeted themselves out of the British Empire, who were like, "yo, we should make this a holiday!" 

   But it didn't become an annual celebration until 1830-something, when Abraham Lincoln was like, "oh yeah, ok, we can do that" 

   And now we have Turkey Day!

*awkward jazz hands*