"How can Arnav-Ji talk like that?" Khushi mumbles, crying.

The night is still young and so was her pain.

It was hard for her to think of her Arnav-ji having a son from another woman. Yet she let such thought enter her mind. She didn't want to do any injustice to an innocent woman and the little kid if he has the blood of her husband. The behavior of her family is too effective on her little brain. Her heart broke as they kept comparing Arav with her Arnav-ji. 

She had to become insecure. There's no other option. Or maybe there is, that's why she tried to put her doubt into Arnav's mind. However, ended up fumbling about Jalebi and things she hadn't expected would blurt out. 

Silly Jalebi! A dumb conversation. 

"Crazy woman!" 

She remembered him mumbling, chuckling a little at the question that seemed as crazy as hers.

She remembered pouting at her failure.  She could have gathered more courage.

"It was a platonic relationship. For a week. Nothing more." 

When she heard him say that, she understood it was something positive. But what exactly is platonic? She never knows. 

She wanted to ask, "What does that mean?"

The way she did for a live-in relationship!

She couldn't. Who knows if she'd end up fumbling about Chana this time? 

She was insecure. 

She hoped he would understand her. And he didn't. 

How would he? Unless she tells him she was feeling insecure. She tried already and that was nothing productive.

Their relationship is much deeper than that, isn't it?

He could read her! It is as much a fact as the globe is a sphere.

Alas! He didn't read her.

The love between them is more apparent when they're silent! Isn't that about the whole telepathy they had between them?

What they feel is what they feel in each other's absence more than what they'd in each other's presence. Isn't that the deepest bond they had with each other? 

What she wasn't able to tell, he'd complete her. And what he didn't able to tell, she'd complete him. 

Isn't it? She isn't confident anymore.

"Arnav-Khushi" - if was Khushi who would start the phrase - "Hamesha!" It was Arnav who would complete her. 

How did he fail to read her insecurity?

Her heart burned in the fire of love, only to bring tears to her orbs.

Sheetal, unintentionally or intentionally, kept pouring ghee on her burning heart. She had to grow with her insecurity more than before.   

The little-little things Arnav has known about Sheetal and Sheetal has known about Arnav had her heart slashed in some way. From the first day!

For her, the small things mattered more. 

"I didn't know he was interested in Basket Ball." She cries sitting on the tiles. Remembering the conversation Sheetal and Arnav had among the family. 

She should have known about his little likes and interests he had on sports or other things. She should have known! Alas, she didn't. 

Was that her fault? Maybe! 

But not hers alone. It's the couple always and always will be. No matter what. 

You simply can't clap with one hand!

They should have talked with each other. They should have acted more like a couple. A newly wedded couple. 

Did they act like one?

Never! 

They were oldies, already married for 60 years or so. 

Well, that's how they portrayed themselves to be. 

How would they know about the little-little things they should have known about each other? The talk! Words. These are invented for nothing.

They should have known the value of words. 

If Arnav wasn't able to understand her, she could have talked with him. 

Where was that Khushi who would be a tigress in front of her laad governor?

The plan about the Shyam revelation kept them busy. Fine! What after that? Where did the fearless Khushi go? Did marriage with her husband cut down her wings?

She never considered herself equal to her Arnav-ji. What is she? She's just a middle-class woman in her early twenties, with an incomplete education, nowhere matching the standards of Arnav or Sheetal.

And that somehow poured oil into the burning fire. Pain! She couldn't bear it. 

Everything was so muddled up in her brain. 

Family's comparisons, Sheetal's hints, Arav behavior, everything is roaming around her head. 

It was pure torture for her. She didn't mind sitting inside the cupboard to think peacefully. 

One could only imagine the situation she was put into. 

She had to come to a conclusion and clear her doubts.

So, she decided to go for a DNA test. That was NK's idea which showed her some way. 

Only that the way was wrong and could hurt her husband. 

But at that point in time, all she could think was about her insecurities, the injustice — reason would be her, and the guilt she could be in if she'd snatched the rights of Arav from him. 

She gathered their samples and did the DNA test. 

She hoped for something negative for the first time in her life. 

The damn-ed report is not to be matched!

Only to get caught in front of her husband. 

He was hurt and furious with her. 

She tried to explain and he didn't listen to her. 

What was the guarantee he'd not get angry with her if she could have told him about her doubts before?

Wouldn't he have been got furious? 

Yes or No?

Going by his behavior, he'd get angry! 

However, how can she judge?

He was soberer after their marriage. There's a chance he'd not get angry or even if he would get, it wouldn't be this intense as it is now. 

She could have tried! Gathered enough courage not to fumble about Jalebi or Chana again. 

Maybe the situation could have been different. If she was the Khushi Kumari Gupta, who didn't hesitate to bring Shyam back even after knowing it would only anger her husband, she could have talked with him about Sheetal. 

About her insecurities. 

About the similarities. 

About Arav.

About everything that put her in this state. 

So, what if he'd be furious? Didn't she know how to tackle the ASR in him? She wouldn't have survived if she was the KKG who can argue with Arnav on any matter. 

The Khushi was lost somewhere. Or maybe it's just her insecurities that layered the Khushi in her. 

It's her pain that was layered behind that insecurities. 

It was her hope that was layered behind her pain. 

It's her courage that was layered behind the hope. 

And it's her confidence that was layered behind the courage. 

Khushi was in great need of confidence, which could give her the courage, thus, gather enough hope, giving into the hope of kicking out her pain, and so were her insecurities. 

Only if!

Khushi failed to realize the truth!

The truth that was hidden behind the layer of insecurities. Truth behind the layer!

She needs to get the true Khushi out of her, who would question the opposite regardless of who he was or what can he do. 

"I was wrong!" she whispers. 

She shouldn't have done the DNA test. For it not only hurt her and Arnav, but it also hurt the Khushi in her more.

For she wasn't this! She wasn't a coward to run a test behind her husband's back. 

She was wrong!

"But I don't regret it!" she completes in her mind. 

Yes, she was wrong but she doesn't need to regret it. In some way, she realized where she went wrong, it's about her husband, true, but more than that, it's about the lost confidence in her. 

If a wrong can do the right, what's there to regret?

If she was confident, she didn't need to do what she did. She could have questioned her husband about the way he has been busy these days, about the way he explained things. Only that he didn't give the assurance. In words. More elaborately. 

She could ask, in words, more elaborately. 

Both were at fault. 

She did the mistake of opening the report again, for it was not her fault. It was just her lost courage, the lost real hues of her, that made her open the report again.

It was the last nail in the coffin; the basketball match, where he gave no importance to her.  

She had to see what was in the report. Or her mind wouldn't be at peace. Her heart will keep burning. 

And that was the result of the current situation, the realization now. 

"I'm wrong!" she declares again. 

"But I'd make it right!" she is determined. 

The real Khushi in her would come out. She needs to remove that layer.

Unveil the insecurities in her.

For it would unveil the pain in her, which would unveil the hope in her.

Hope, that would unveil the lost courage in her.

Courage, that would unveil confidence in her.

And that is what was needed for the upcoming confrontation between her and her husband. 

Confrontation and much-needed words are to be exchanged between them. 

Both of them had realized their mistakes in a relationship and as an individual. 

To be continued..,

Khushi's PoV is up!

How is it?

AN: I've always thought the real Khushi was lost here, more than ever before. This update is the output of it. 

What do you think about her PoV from my PoV(third PoV)?

3 more to go! And it ends!