FIFTEEN

Her sneakers tread 

against the dirt ground

and her laces

are mangled with dirt 

and pine needles

before slowing to 

an abrupt stop.

"This..."

The thorns curl around her lungs

making it so much harder 

for her to simply breath.

"This is the last...place?"

Ash ruffles her hair,

and does not look back

as he strides ahead of her,

with her following 

in his footsteps.

The sky is the color of bruises.

sea blues, emerald greens, and dark purples.

beautiful visible bruises color the sky

in artfully painted strokes.

These bruises are visible.

The bruises and gashes 

left within her lungs

caused by the beautiful thorns

and jasmine flowers, 

were not.

"...This was our treehouse."

They climb the rope ladder

that dangles from 

the little cozy treehouse

that they had found

when they were children.

It is exactly how she remembers it.

In the corner,

is a tiny unkept mattress

scattered with comic books

and photographs,

with a measly quilt

thrown on top of it.

Ash flicks on a little switch,

and a string of solar fairy lights

running around the house

flickers on.

It is the same cozy bed

that ash had cried in,

on his twelfth birthday,

where she had given 

him his unbirthday pink cupcake,

where they spilt their tears on

as they read the little misadventures

of Alice Lidell.

Maddie hears 

the familiar creak of the floorboards

as she moves to the bed.

"Why...why did you take me here?"

her ribcages feel 

as if they're squeezing her lungs.

"...I didn't think you'd remember us."

He sits beside her,

the mattress slightly dipping

with his weight.

the sweet smell of jasmine

envelopes her once more.

"I've tried forgetting."

he says, averting her eyes.

"but it sure is fucking hard to."

Maddie's eyes land onto

the photographs clipped 

onto the fairy lights, 

and her lips curve into a sad smile.

Photographs of her and ash

on their first days of second grade,

with toothless silly grins,

and wacky memories.

"Then why the hell did you leave?"

she whispers,

and the weight

is suddenly off her chest,

and the anger

rises from the surface.

"Why the fuck, 

did you leave,

without a single fucking goodbye?"

He does not utter,

a single word.

And Maddie cannot help

but allow the words to spill out of her, 

like a waterfall of her emotions,

because she was and always has been

so angry and so hurt.

"You were here,

and you promised me,

but you simply disappeared.

and now you're back,

but you're not 

Ash,

You're nothing 

but a fucking stranger, 

who fucking remembered

all of our memories,

but led me on to believe

that I wasn't fucking worth remembering.

All of that time,

you were my only friend

since kindergarten,

and we were the inseparable

because everything you did

I did,

and we spent days and nights

crying and laughing together,

about fairytales,

about the world and how silly it was,

because that's what best friends do.

best friends don't leave each other.

But you left

and you said

'I'll see you in a bit'

and I waited

and waited

and waited

for you.

You told me to wait ,

in this very spot,

and I did,

and I have been

for the past five years,

but you 

      never 

         showed 

                   up. "

Maddie doesn't realize that she is crying

until she feels the hot tears 

streaming down her cheeks 

and stinging her eyes.

Ash finally meets her gaze,

his silvery eyes unreadable.

And suddenly 

           he's

                kissing 

                            her.

There is something about the kiss

that is urgent, yet so absolutely

and blissfully warming.

His warm lips are against hers,

and she could almost taste

the slight bitterness of tea 

and the sweetness of sugar

and she could not help

but sigh against his lips.

"Maddie," 

he murmurs her name

against her lips,

before slowly leaning closer to her,

with his right hand cupping her face so gently

"Fuck, I'm so sorry."

His voice is filled

with so 

much 

sorrow,

that it

cracks,

and he draws away from her,

but his hand still rests 

on the side of her tearstained face.

"I never meant 

to cause you

  so 

    much 

          pain."

He breaks away completely,

and she immediately misses the contact.

"I'm a fucking mess."

he swears and buries his hands in his hair.

"I wish,

I wish I could have told you the truth.

so it didn't have to end the way that it did.

but I was so fucking scared

and I needed to find a way to figure it out."

"Figure what out?" she asks.

He stands up from the bed. 

"There's one last place we have to go."