My hands couldn't stop shaking and my legs couldn't stop bouncing as I sat in the chair and allowed for some random lady to do my hair. It was my wedding day.

My wedding day.

It didn't sound right to me and it still felt unreal. Earlier  I had locked myself in the bathroom and broke out into tears until Lada came and calmed me down. She told me that hiding would do me no good and I hate to admit it but she was right. I haven't seen Czar all week, after the gala he decided to start his bachelor party a bit early and hasn't been home since then. I decide not to have a bachelorette party. I didn't even invite my family to the wedding so I wasn't expecting anyone to be on my side, maybe Czar will have random people sit there so it doesn't look empty.

My mother called me about five times but I didn't answer once. I told security that her and my father weren't allowed one foot on the property. Josiah was more than welcomed to come but I knew he wouldn't, he would just feel comfortable and out of place like I am. 

"You're going to look so pretty." Lada smiled at me.

I bit down on my lip but didn't say anything. I knew she was just trying to make me feel better but nothing would make what was happening today any less painful. I was basically giving my life away and I wasn't okay with that. I wanted to scream and cry and just break down, but I decide I would keep it together until I got the chance to be alone, then I could cry as much as I wanted.

Irina had been crying non-stop since she entered the room and saw me in make-up. I hardly knew the women but she was comforting me and being more motherly towards me than my mom was. 

"I know this isn't your ideal wedding." She said as she stood beside me and patted my shoulders. "But my Czar is a good man, he'll take great care of you. If you become too unhappy I'll talk to him, find a way to get you out of this."

"Really?" I said as I looked up at her.

She smiled and wiped a tear from her eye. "Yes really."

I thanked her quietly before glancing back in the mirror, I could hardly recognize the face staring back at me. The make-up artist had done a wonderful job, my skin never looked this flawless.

"Do you feel it yet?" Annika asked as she came up behind me.

"Feel what?" I asked 

"The nerves, the excitement of being married in less than an hour now."  She gushed.

"Not very much." I said as I looked down at my hands.

Annika didn't say anything, she simply walked away and I got the feeling I had hurt her feelings a tad. Her and Czar were very close, closer than I expected especially since Czar was always so cold and stand-offish. I could understand why she would get upset by my lack of excitement from marrying her brother, but what did she expect me to do? Get up and dance around like some idiot?

"Is your mother not coming Zariah? I haven't seen her and I can tell them to hold the ceremony if you'd like.' Lada offered.

I shook my head. "I didn't invite any of my family. We're not exactly on speaking terms."

She nodded her head with understanding before quickly changing the subject. "Well, since your hair is done we should finally get you into the dress.

She helped me out of the chair and guided me to the closet where she pulled the dress down from the rack.

Lada helped me put the dress on and when I turned to face her she was almost in tears. "You make the perfect bride."

I smiled and turned to the mirror to see the dress for myself. Czar had got Darcey Couture to design it, I nearly cried when he told me. He knew how much I loved her work and I thought the gesture was a very kind one.

The dress was solid white at the top, it was a long sleeve and had a plunging neck line and it fit me like a glove.. The bottom had was made of complete lace that took form in roses. The dress was huge and somewhat hard to maneuver in but I was in love. The hairstyles had straightened my hair and put it into some fancy up do that brought the whole bride look together.

"Can't forget this." Irina said as she entered the room with a diamond crown that looked like it cost more than my whole entire life.

"Wow, that looks expensive." I said.

"It's from my wedding." She smiled. "Lada refused to wear it at hers and Annika isn't close to getting married so I figured that you should wear it."

I knew I couldn't refuse the women so I tilted my head and allowed for her to place the crown on top of it. I turned to the mirror and nearly cried, I looked stunning and if this was a real wedding I would be balling my eyes out right now.

"Czar is going to die when he sees you." Annkia said.

I rolled my eyes, Czar rarely showed any emotion and I doubt he will cry over seeing me in some white dress.

"Well the rest of us should get dressed, I'll be back shortly to help you with your shoes." Lada said.

Everyone began to exit the room and I took a seat on the bed. I realized this would be the last night of me having my own bed, I tried to talk to Czar about the transition to his room and he told me it was happening rather I liked or not. He did offer to sleep on the couch until I got comfortable, I don't think I would ever get comfortable.

I could hear people chatting outside in the back yard, although I wanted to take a peek. Lada made it clear that if I did she would call the whole thing off just to re-plan the wedding and I'm sure that would piss Czar off.

I looked down at my phone which was ringing again, my mom's name appeared on the screen and I sighed as I answer the phone.

"Yes mom." I tried to keep my voice study.

"We're all here honey, for the wedding. The guards aren't letting your father and I in but Josiah already went inside to take a seat. Can you tell them that we are your parents." She said.

I cleared my throat. "I told them not to let you or dad in."

"What?"

"You're not invited mom." I said again, my voice stronger.

"But, why?" Her voice cracked.

"Are you really asking me why? Because of dad I'm getting married to some stranger and you did nothing but stand by and watch as he signed my life away. You didn't fight for me, I don't want you ay my wedding." I said as I ended the call.

I began to fan my eyes to prevent myself from crying, although I was sad I wasn't going to make it easy for them. I'll never let them forget about this.

"I'm back." Lada said as she entered the room with my golden pumps in her hand.

Lada, Lonnie and Annika were my braid's maids. They all were wearing red dressed that were long sleeves and stopped mid-thigh. Lada's hair was curled and let loose and her make-up was light. She told me no one should look better on the bride on her wedding day yet she still looked amazing.

"Those look like death traps." I said as I pointed to the shoes.

"They're not, now sit."

I did what I was told and sat down. She put the shoes on me before stepping back to look at me.

"You really do look beautiful Zariah." She said.

"Thank you." I stood up and tried to walk around in the shoes to adjust to them.

"Anderi is walking you out." She said.

"Not your father?" I said.

She looked down at the ground. " He's dead." She said quietly.

I didn't know that Czar's father was dead, in fact he kept a picture of him in the house but he never talked about him. I assumed his father was just a busy man but I guess I had been wrong.

"Well I'm going to head down. Anderi will come get you shortly. Don't sweat you look perfect." She gave me a thumbs up before exiting the room.

I had time to myself and I still couldn't actually believe I was getting married. I paced back and forth and bit on my lip nervously until there were three taps on the door. I opened the door  to find Anderi who was smiling from ear to ear.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

"More ready than I'll ever be." I breathed as I looped my arm with his.

He helped me down the stairs and we walked to the double doors that lead to the backyard. Two guards were on each side waiting to open the doors. I could hear soft music playing beyond the doors and figured that everyone was getting seated and situated.

"Relax, you're shaking like mad." Anderi said as he placed his hand on my arm.

"I-I won't know any of these people. They w-will all be staring at me." I mumbled.

"Look at it as if it's only you and Czar there, the rest of the people don't exist."

"But they do." I breathe. "I can't walk down the aisle my anxiety-"

"You're going to do just fine, and I'm right here with you. Squeeze my arm if you can't take it and I promise you I will walk you back inside."

I nodded my head and soon the music shifted to Canon in D. Anderi nodded to the guards and they opened the double doors. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a deep breathe, I could hear people whispering and a few gasps.

"You can do this." Anderi said.

I nodded my head and opened my eyes as I began to walk. Both sides of the aisle were filled and I was surprised to see my family members who were smiling brightly at me, some of them I haven't seen in years. I assume that it was Lada's idea to invite them. On Czar's side were mostly men and few women, I assumed these were the people who worked under him, They all looked serious and professionals. 

I looked up front and locked eyes with Czar. It was no different than seeing him in his business suit but the all white suit that he wore looked amazing on him. His bow tie was gold and his curly brown hair was slicked back and his beard seemed to have grown out a bit more since I last saw him. He looked good as usual.

I couldn't take his burning stare so I looked down at the ground, clutching the bouquet of roses in my hands.

"You look great sis." I hear Josiah said and I glanced at him.

This was the first time I ever seen him in a suit. He was smiling at me with a few tears dropping from his eyes as he watched me walk down the aisle. I smiled at him, happy that he had stayed for the ceremony.

Anderi and I finally reached the end of the aisle and the music began to fade. Anderi smiled at me before placing my hand into Czar's and he helped me step up. I couldn't look him in the eye as I tried to focus on anything but him.

The priest began to talk and I bit my lip nervously. I felt Czar squeeze my hand and I looked up at him, he was still staring at me and I stared back.

"Do you, Czar Kuzmich, take Zariah Jones as your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, and through sickness and health, until death do you part?" The priest  asked.

"I do." Czar said so clear.

"Do you, Zariah Jones, take Czar Kuzmich as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for better or for worse, and through sickness and health, until dead do you part?"

I took a shaky breath and Czar gave my hand another squeeze. "I do." 

"I now pronounce you Husband and Wife, you may kiss the bride!" The priest announced.

Czar leaned in and I held my breath. He got close to my mouth but didn't kiss my lips, instead he kissed the corner of them. But to the crowd it would appear that we were sharing a real kiss. He held it for a few seconds before pulling back and the crowd broke out into cheer and applause.

"Thank you." I mouth.

He nodded his head once before turning to the crowd and lifting out hands up. I waved to my family as we walked down the aisle, a few people threw rice on us which caused Czar to complain but once we were inside the house I felt like I could barley breathe. 

"You look beautiful." Czar said as he looked me up and down.

I bit my lip. "Thank you, you look great too."

"How do you feel?" He asked.

"What? About the fake wedding?" 

His face shifted but he said nothing further. We waited a few minutes before the doors opened back up and we walked out into the backyard. The set up was under one huge tent that had white drapes around it. The tables had red cloths on them with white rose pedals thrown around them.  The seats were white with golden bands and the center pieces were decorated pictures of Czar and I from our childhood. I had to admit that Lada had outdone herself.

"Aw, baby Czar." I said as I pointed to a picture of Czar.

He had his cheeks out and was shaking his bottom in the camera.

"We will not discuss that." He said as he placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me through the crowd.

"Zariah!" I heard someone call.

I turned to find my Aunt Lorie, my cousin Arie, and Josiah approaching us.

"You look amazing." Arie said as she brought me in for a hug.

"Yeah that make up really covered up you're ugliness." Josiah joked and I swatted my hand at him.

"I can't believe you didn't tell us you were engaged. We didn't even know you were seeing someone. Your mother told us nothing." My Aunt Lorie said.

I looked at Czar and then turned back to her. "We wanted to keep it a secret you know, just to enjoy each other's company without other's butting in."

"Understandable." Arie said.

I could feel Josiah eyeing me but he said nothing. We continued to chat for a bit and I have them each a hug before Czar and I walked to our table and took a seat.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" I asked Czar.

"I don't do parties." He said as he looked at the crowd.

"So why have such a big wedding?" I asked.

"It was Lada's idea and there was no convincing her otherwise."

I laughed at the though of Lada harassing Czar to throw some big wedding. I smiled and looked at Czar.

"Thanks again for not actually, you know, kissing me." I said.

"I wouldn't do something without your permission, it is your body after all."

I smiled and turned and watched the crowd.

*~*

The rest of the night was spent by people giving speeches, Czar and I dancing awkwardly, cutting the cake, and people getting so drunk that they were passing out on the lawn. Lada made Czar and I take a few pictures and told me that one day I would thank her for it even though I doubted it. Irina danced with Czar a few times and cried after each dance, telling him how proud she was of him.

Eventually it was time for Czar and I to catch our plane for our honeymoon. Lada had already packed my pack for me and was helping me get out of my wedding dress.

"I wish I could come with you guys, I could use a vacation." She said as she unzipped the back of my dress.

"I'm sure Czar would loved that." I joked and we laughed together.

She eventually got me out of the wedding dress and helped me out on a red loose red dress. The guards took my bags down and I followed after them. Czar was waiting for me in the hall, already dressed in his t-shirt and kakis. 

"Ready?" He asked.

I nodded my head and we exited out the doors. People stood clapping and cheering as we made out way to the car. I waved out the window as Czar got into the driver's seat. I gave Josiah one last hug before Czar pulled offed.

"Are you ready for the honey moon?" He asked.

"As ready as I'll ever be." I sighed.

*~*

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