Nandini

A red bindi adorned the center of her forehead and red lip shade painted her lips while her eyes were lined with kohl. The tinkling of her bangles and anklets filled the heavy silence as the beautician arranged the red veil on her head before leaving her alone.

The eyes always speak the words our mouth can't and as she stared at herself, decked up in the red bridal lehenga and heavy jewellery, hers reflected the dread of what the future held for her, ironic to the happiness portrayed by the loud bass of dhol as the baraat approached the venue.

As she sat on the bed, she picked up the photograph of her parents, smiling at each other as her father's arm wrapped around his wife's shoulder. Nandini stared at her father, her eyes burning with unshed tears, her memories blurred but beautiful, has she lost him due to a heart attack when she was twelve. But, she knew he was an amazing person, inside out due to a few stories that her mother sometimes mentioned, the heartache too strong to even remember her deceased husband, or told how Nandini was an exact replica of her father in behaviour. Caring, kind and happy with life. She wondered how it would have felt if her father was beside her today.

As she was busy imagining a world far away from reality, she was snapped out of it and pulled back to reality a few minutes later when the door opened and her cousins entered before one of them, Rishika teased, "Arey Sanu tu kitni sundar lag rahi hain. Jiju ki toh aaj lottery khul gayi."

Nandini forced herself to smile as giggles and laughter erupted around before they were ushered out of the room by her mother. Her mother blinked her eyes, to keep her tears at bay as she brought a gold necklace and locked it over Nandini's neck.

"This was given to me by your grandmother on my wedding day," she whispered with a smile and Nandini reciprocated, although with a faint one. A knock resonated through the silent room before her cousin poked her head in and informed them that Nandini needed to be brought down in five minutes. Nandini stared at her mother as she took a seat at the edge of the bed.

Savitri engulfed her daughter tightly, savouring the feeling of her baby in her arms, as she said,"Know that you're never alone. I'm just a phone call away, anytime and your Baba, even though he isn't present here, he is always looking over you, and now, by God's grace, you will have Manik too.

Always remember that in a marriage, trust and communication are really important. Sometimes hurting a person with truth is much better than giving them hope with lies and secrets. Although, I know that you will never hurt a person intentionally, but sometimes misunderstandings happen. Don't get angry and instead of yelling things that you don't mean after you calm down talk to him with a rational mind. He has his whole family's responsibilities on his shoulders, care for him and don't stress him with unnecessary household problems. Deal with them on your own. It can really strengthen your relationship. Yeah?"

When Savitri felt her daughter nodding, she kissed her daughter's forehead, blinking her eyes to keep her emotions in check before she stepped back from the embrace, knowing it was time to let her go.

*****

Four of her cousin brothers came, holding an elegant chaadar, made of delicate tuberoses woven together in an intricate pattern, over her head.

A wedding song echoed in the wedding hall as she entered and was blinded by the lights of the camera, recording these moments to be reminisced in the future.

Slowly she was led towards the stage, where Manik was waiting for her and stretched his hand to help her upstairs. Her heart pounded as her eyes met his and as her hand was handed over to him, she handed over her life to fate. His fingers wrapped around her frail hand and he carefully led her to the stage amidst the hooting and teasing.

As their respective families gathered around, they both were handed over the garlands, made of maroon carnations. As Nandini was about to place it around his neck, laughter rang around as his friends and cousins raised him up on their shoulders. Manik watched with amusement as Nandini sighed in irritation, fed up while rising on her tiptoes, trying to place the garland around his neck and managing her heavy lehenga simultaneously.

A roar of laughter and teasing reverberated in the silence of the night as Manik lowered his head, helping her out, while her cheeks turned crimson in shyness. After exchanging the garlands, they were made to sit on the wooden royal sofa and people scurried away on the dance floor and the food stalls while the guests one by one approached the couple for photographs and bestowed their blessing by handing over the wedding gifts.

Soon, the auspicious time for their wedding rituals arrived and the couple was led to a pavilion, embellished with royal red drapes lined with golden fairy lights, where a priest was awaiting their arrival. Their close family and friends occupied the chairs arranged around in the cold winter night while Nandini and Manik sat beside each other on the mandap chairs in front of the havan kund.

Nandini's shaking hands fisted in her lap, her heart pounding in trepidation with her eyes lowered as the priest chanted the mantras in Sanskrit while lightening up the havan. When the time for Kanyadan arrived, her Chachu stepped up. While the kama-sukta was performed, where Manik promised to not fail his wife in his pursuit of dharma, artha and kama, Nandini was lost in a far away world, created by her father and her as she reminisced about the times her father talked about his dreams regarding her marriage, none of them foreseeing a day where he wouldn't even be present with her on such a big day of her life.

But, that's what life is. Happy dreams are only an illusion, a contrast to the sad reality which is the truth of life. A truth which sometimes we are adamant not to accept but are not given any choice. And so was Nandini, as she was snapped out of her reverie as her dainty hand was enclosed by his, marred with years of toil and sweat for the ritual of paani grahanam where he vowed to hold her hand and lead her safely in their married life while she surrendered her heart to the groom, represented by her closed fingers in his hand.

Soon, the edge of her dupatta was tied to his stole and they were asked to stand up for Saptapadi (Saat Phere). With the Vedic God of Fire, the Agni, as their witness, the most sacred union of two souls took place as they circumambulate the fire lit havan, with their hands held together, seven times, symbolizing their union with each other for seven lifetimes.

Amidst the Sanskrit chanting and with each step, they vowed to carry out their responsibilities towards each other and their families, to acquire happiness and harmony by mutual love and respect and to secure the highest kind of friendship, cherishing each other sincerely with their hearts, forever.

After the sapta padi, they sat on the western side of the sacred fire, symbolizing Nandini as now part of Manik's life to conduct pradhana homam where sixteen mantras were recited while offering ghee at the end of each recital for various Vedic God's blessings for children, long and healthy life and prosperity. The priest explained each mantra in Hindi, making everyone laugh aloud as Manik stopped mid way for a moment when one of them included the groom asking God Indra to bless them with ten children and requests he become the eleventh child of his bride in his old age.

Some time later, the heat of the fire of Yajna made Nandini blink her eyes, not only because her eyes started to fill with smoke but to stop herself from sleeping as well, and to divert herself she looked at everyone around her. Some people slept on each other's shoulders, tired from the day's events, while some drank caffeine to keep themselves awake while they talked with each other and laughed at the poorest of jokes, half asleep. Nandini smiled slightly as one of her cousin's kids, nearly six years old, Abhi went under Manik's sister Mukti's chair and tried to subtly steal Manik's shoes.

Soon, Nandini's cupped hands were filled with parched rice by one of her cousin brother's before a shiver racked down her spine as Manik towered over her and gently held her hands from behind before they offered the rice in the sacred fire together amongst the Sanskrit mantras, where she prayed for his long life and a marriage full of peace and harmony.

Her eyes flickered to him before she averted them as she found him already looking at her, as he moved closer, holding in her breath as his breath fanned over her face as he tied the sacred thread, mangalsutra, around her neck while his mother helped him by holding aside her veil. She released a sigh of relief as he backed away before the marriage was to be concluded by the final ritual, sindoor daan.

Nandini watched Manik as he reached for the vermilion, snapping her out of her zone as she watched his hand with erratic breathing, while everything around her turned into a blur, with people's laughter and whispers turning ten times louder than before. At that moment, her eyes frantically searched around for mother to embrace her in his arms and assure that everything was going to be fine. That she wouldn't fail the vows and is strong enough to handle this sudden change in her life.

Her head bowed and she closed her eyes impulsively, as Manik reached towards the partition of her hair with vermilion and filled it. And just like that, Nandini was metamorphosed from being an acquaintance to his wife, altering her whole life with only hope in her heart to trust this new beginning.

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