*Julia*

"It's over." I smile and gaze at James. He was meant to be right here. Right in this bed with me. Laying right next to me just like this. James let's out a sigh of relief.

"I can't believe you chose to be here with me for your home confinement." I run my fingers through the tired man's hair and he closes his eyes.

"I'll always choose you." James says right as he drifts off to sleep. I scoot over a little more and lay against him, thanking God my best friend is here and not behind bars.

*****

For the first time in a long time, I slept through the night and didn't wake up with a PTSD nightmare. James fell asleep quickly and no, we didn't fool around. Just being next to each other was all we wanted.

Paul's bed is back to the pull-out couch. Nate came by last night with my Target order, a new laptop, and this foam padding meant for pull-out couches for some extra comfort for Paul. It seemed to work because he is still sound asleep. I turn to look at the alarm clock. 7:00am. If I'm not in the cafeteria by 8:00am you-know-who will be pounding on my door.

I stare at peacefully sleeping James for a moment. Then Maggie starts moving around in her doggy bed, letting me know she needs to go out.

"C'mon, sweet girl."

Maggie follows me, and I let her out into the backyard and then start the coffee for Paul. While leaning against the counter waiting for the coffee to brew, I look around the apartment.

So, this is my life.

This is my new beginning. I'm going to detox, go to all my sessions, and take care of James. I'm going to try really hard to change. To get back on track. To get better. BE better.

I look down at my trembling hands.

And I'm going to do it without drugs.

******

*Nate*

"Mornin."" Trisha greets me by ripping my curtains open, so the sun is right in my eyes, making me groan and roll over.

"Why are you so fucking annoying." I grumble under the pillow and feel Trisha lay in my bed, pulling the covers over her. "And why the hell are your feet like little ice cubes?" I kick her feet away from mine making her laugh.

"I booked a private session for you in the studio today. You're welcome." She says and her 'you're welcome' is laced with sarcasm.

"Can't I get one day to sleep in after all the shit we just went through?"

"Nope. You're THE Nate Hollan, remember?" Trisha pulls my pillow off my head, pecks me on the lips and cuddles up to my bare chest. I wrap an arm behind her and sigh.

"Well, THE Nate Hollan is tired and needs a vacation."

"And THE Richard-The-Asshole is up my butt about you making more music."

Jesus, that man is relentless. I JUST put out another album, about to go back on tour and have dealt with more personal ups and downs than he probably has in his whole life, yet he wants me to get going on the next album already? Some things never change.

I reach over and grab my phone while Trisha is drawing figure eights with my chest hair, the bit that I have at least. I bet Evan, manly-man Evan with that full beard has a full chest of it while I look like a prepubescent boy with my slight scruff.

My thoughts are interrupted when I go online.

"Shit." I sit up, which jolts Trisha up as well. "You've got to be kidding me."

"Oh God. NOW what?"

"Susan Hardy. She's at it again." I read the article as Trisha grabs my phone. I knew Hardy would have a write up ready for after the trial, but she always finds ways to tangle my life into everything more than it needs to be. One of James's sister's, Ashley, didn't help.

Apparently, Susan got ahold on Ashley outside the courthouse after the trial ended. Trisha clicks on the clip before reading the article.

"So, it looks like your brother will be spending his six months at The Avalon with Julia Moretti. How do you feel about this decision?" Susan asks Ashley.

"I mean, it's his choice." She shrugs and tries to walk away but Hardy has more to ask.

"So, you're ok with it? Even with the history between James and Miss. Moretti? Nate Hollan and Miss Moretti?" Susan presses on and Ashley stops.

"I will support my brother in any way I can, regardless of if I agree with his decision."

"So you DON'T agree, then."

"No. I don't. But it's his life not mine."

"Where would you have liked to see him?" Susan asks.

"I mean. In his own home. James loves his home. He's just doing this because he's in love with Julia. He doesn't belong at The Avalon. He's not a drug addict or anything like that."

"Shit, C'mon Ashley, haven't you ever heard of 'no comment'?" I pinch the tension already forming between my eyes and take my phone back as Trish looks on. I can't be mad at any of the Gallo girls. They aren't used to this stuff, being followed around by reporters. They haven't been media trained one bit.

"Well, there you have it. Even James's Gallo's sisters are shocked he chose to spend his house-arrest at the well-known detox facility- to be with Julia Moretti." Susan watches Ashley walk away and then turns her attention to the camera. "Julia who is quote unquote engaged to singer Nate Hollan. Maybe things aren't going as well as we thought between the two."

"Really?" I furrow my brows, getting ready to chuck my phone across the room but Trisha snatches it out of my hand.

"Oh no you don't." She hands me my pillow to throw instead. I throw it but get absolutely no satisfaction from that.

"That wench is always trying to stir the pot." I groan and lay back down.

"It's the only thing she knows how to do." Trisha says and curls back up against me. "Besides, how did you think people are going to react to this? I mean, it's a little nuts. Choosing to live at the Avalon when you don't need to be there. Of course the girls would want him home."

"He wants to be with Jules. She takes good care of him."

"Because he lets her. He didn't give me a chance."

I laugh a little and Trisha glares at me.

"What?" She cocks her brow.

"Nothing. You are an amazing caretaker, angel. You know that. You're just not Julia."

"Thank God." She mutters.

"You lack compassion sometimes. You pick and choose who you want to give your attention to. Julia is compassionate to EVERYONE around her, no matter what. You're....judgy."

"Judgy? Is that even a real word??"

"Don't know but you're it. Judgmental. You don't really make people feel all warm and fuzzy inside." I admit.

"Oh, I make you feel-" She begins to flirt.

"You know what I mean, Trish." I sit up a little now. "You get the job done and it's always an excellent job but you lack the emotional connection with some people. Not with me but other people. That's all."

"Gee, thanks." She crosses her arms over her chest and pouts. I'm not wrong, though. If Trisha had opened up to James more...built up their relationship a little bit, maybe he wouldn't still be so hung up on Jules. And if Trisha was a little nicer to Julia maybe Jules wouldn't feel looked down upon.

"Not with me, like I said. You pick and choose who you want to open up to. Julia was never on that list. You know yesterday I saw she was still using that crappy Avalon shit for shampoo? All of the stuff she owned for personal care items was from the Avalon. Even the fucking toothbrush. She was using this thin little comb they gave her for all that hair of hers."

"Why the hell would she do that??"

"Because she doesn't want to bother anyone or ask for anything for herself. And when I told her I'd have you put a Target order in for her she almost snapped my head off. She doesn't want you doing any favors for her. She doesn't want to impose or even ASK you."

"But that's what I do. For everyone here. I'm always the one who-"

"EXACTLY. Don't you get it? She rather go without than ask you. It's the way you make her feel, dollface. Like she's a nuisance." I wrap an arm around Trisha, knowing I'm hurting her feelings a little by saying all this but it needs to be said. I may be the only one who can get away with this brutal honesty with Trisha.

"So she's been using the shitty Avalon stuff they give you in the welcome bag? This whole time?" She frowns. Trisha would NEVER. She is so fucking high- maintenance like me. She gets her luxury shampoo from the same company I do, that ships it from the spa in London. Julia's not even using the TARGET brand. She goes even lower to the AVALON brand. It's like washing your hair with dish detergent.

"This whole time. You really need to change your ways a little."

"Anything else Oh Perfect One??"

"Not today." I kiss her cheek and smirk as she rolls her eyes. "Now get out of my bed. I have a studio session to go to."

******

*Julia*

"You didn't have to come down with me. I could have helped you eat and then come down alone." I grab a tray for myself and one for James who follows me. Maggie was content staying back at my apartment with Paul so she must feel comfortable there. That's a good thing because the energy in this cafeteria of people in need would have that therapy dog needing therapy for herself.

"What. You embarrassed to be around me?" James smirks.

"God no. You know that. But you also know some of these people are like... well...crazy like me." I talk while adding food to our trays and walking down the line.

"You're not crazy, babe."

I turn and make a face at James.

"Ok. Maybe a little crazy...." He admits.

"Hey you got that hot guy with you today." Cara has fucking hearts for eyeballs as she checks James out when she walks by. James who is like 20 years older than her, though he doesn't look it.

"Ignore her. She's been in rare form lately." I huff and we walk to my table.

"You still sit alone??" James looks around at the crowded cafeteria and then down at me and my empty table.

"Yep. It's fine. I'll always be the outcast. Sometimes Mike Maloney will join me. Especially if he sees Jeremy coming my way." I open James's box of orange juice, stick a straw in it and hold it up to his mouth for him. He takes a sip but then looks around the room.

"Babe, people are staring at me."

"Good," I proceed to cut up his waffle for him. "Let em look. They're just checking out the hot new guy."

"No. It's because..." He lifts up his hands that shake.

"They're hands are shaking too, sweetie. Half the people here are detoxing from fricken heroin." I say and he laughs at that. "Be happy you're not detoxing."

I place the fork with the waffle in his hand and wait for him to grip it well before letting go.

"See? You're doing better than they are. They're just jealous."

"Incoming." Mike says and sits down right across from me. I look up to see Jeremy entering the room. How Mike noticed him before he was noticeable is certainly bodyguard instincts.

My hands clam up a little. When I told Nate about my laptop yesterday it brought me right back to that day. I remember the laptop falling off the bed when Jeremy spun me around and shoved my face into the mattress. I couldn't breathe. He held my head down and I couldn't breathe. Sometimes it's the little things that trigger memories. The laptop was one of them.

"You good, pal?" Mike looks up at me. "You're looking a little......green."

"I'm fine." I mutter and turn to James to help him with breakfast.

"ARE you ok?" James whispers. "You're breathing a little heavier." He frowns and clumsily swipes a tear that rolls down my face.

"Yep. Just remembering shit."

"Julia. How's everyone adjusting?" Jeremy doesn't waste any time with other patients. His smile fades when he studies my face. "Everything ok over here?"

Jeremy sits down next to Mike, but his eyes remain on me. I look away and feed James.

"Jule. Did something happen?" He leans in a little, still ignoring James and Mike.

"Just remembering something...from my past." I mutter and cut up more of the waffle.

"You know, it's good to talk about that stuff when it comes up.You haven't had a one-on-one therapy session in a while. Talking about things helps with the healing process."

Does it now....

"Yeah. This incident happened at the Marriott. I'm pretty sure you don't want me saying it out loud." I snap and Jeremy's eyes widen. "Can we take our breakfast back to my 'room'?"

"Yeah." Jeremy says softly with a hurt look on his face. "Go ahead."

I scramble to my feet and grab both of our trays. James follows me out.

"Does he always make it a point to sit at your table?" James asks while we walk down the long hall. We are on the complete other side of the building.

"Who, Mike? Someti-"

"Dr. Donovan."

"Oh. Yep. Every chance he gets." I sigh.

"How the hell can you heal with him hovering over you all the time? Babe, you're healing FROM him. You need healing BECAUSE of him."

"And people wonder why I'm a druggie." I sigh again.

"You're not a druggie. You don't choose to be injected with Ativan."

"Yeah, well I don't choose to have Jeremy around me either. It just happens." I shake my head and give James a weak smile.

"Something's gotta change, babe. You can't fully heal like this."

"Thanks Doctor." I smirk and continue the long walk to my place.

*******

*Nate*

Trisha was right. Getting back in the studio right away was a good idea. She booked an hour-long private session for me so I can strum away and jot down lyrics without interruptions. The room is all mine.

While strumming aimlessly I close my eyes. This is how I get the creative juices flowing. I reminisce about things and man, a lot of things have happened in the last few months. But it all circles back to Julia.

I'm so in love with her. Everything about her. But I wonder if having James with her 24/7 is going to change her. Is this going to bite me in the end? Is Julia going to fall back in love with James while I'm on tour and then change her mind about us? I mean, they are sharing a bed for God's sakes. Then again, she was sharing a bed with Paul and I know for a fact, they are not in love with each other. Jules just felt safe with him close by. Especially there with creepy Donovan lurking in the shadows.

I thought maybe with the fact that James and Trisha were a couple that would help, but it sounds like maybe things have fizzled a little with the two of them. Just like they did with Trisha and Paul. And it's not the men. It's her. She is so closed off. Something she really needs to work on.

I can't even be mad at Julia if she falls for James. Because the guy adores her.

This is what it feels like. Being in love. Loving Julia so much that all I want is to see her happy, even if that means it's not with me. Even if it's with James. Because I would be pissed if it was anyone else. But not James. The guy that was once my archenemy, I now want to see happy. Who would have thought I would ever care about him the way I do now? I cringed whenever I saw him at the Marriott front desk and that man has used me as her personal punching bag on more than one occasion. I should despise him. Not anymore. He's like my brother, now.

*********

*Julia*

I show James (and Maggie) around the Avalon a little. He can roam around here freely but the minute he leaves the premises he will have to check out at the front desk and get his ankle monitor put on.

"So this is the gym. No one ever uses it though." I walk around the small room. For such an expensive facility it only has two treadmills, two bikes and a bunch of free weights. Nothing like the one in Nate's building. But James doesn't frown or look even look disappointed. Because he is James. He is always grateful. Even with the little things.

"We can at least workout together. Heck, put Maggie on the treadmill." I laugh at my own joke. "I know it's not much..."

"It's perfect." James says but he is looking down at me and my skin breaks out in goosebumps from that one small thing.

"The cafeteria is only open until 7 but this little kitchen area always has little things. Like cereal and fruit. Coffee, tea and juice. Though I have my apartment now, so we don't really need anything here." I think about how James enjoys the little things like when we went food shopping together. He won't be able to do that anymore and that saddens me. I don't bring it up though.

"Oh, and I asked Jeremy if the back garden was considered part of the facility since it's still on the premises behind the gate and he said yes, you can go out to the garden without your ankle bracelet thing. It's just when you actually leave the Avalon." I walk James outside. We've been out here before, but I could tell Maggie wanted to go out so head out to the garden and sit on the grass. It's warmer than usual today and the sun is beating down on us which makes it even nicer. James sits down next to me while we watch Maggie sniffing around.

"See? Not so bad. Better than jail, right?" I nudge him with my shoulder and lay down in the grass. James does the same and faces me.

"I have everything I need." James tucks my hair behind my ear. He's back to flirting with me again and I am starting to feel things stir. Things I've been suppressing for a while because I'm with Nate. James is... well... isn't he with Trisha??  It doesn't matter. I'm with Nate. I'm engaged to Nate. 

"Have you talked to Trisha lately?"

"No. I probably should. She doesn't like coming here." 

"I gathered that much." I tilt my head up to the sun and close my eyes. "She'll come around. You're her boyfriend. She'll have to if she wants to see you."

I feel James put his hand on my cheek right before his lips touch mine, making heat travel through my body. At first, I give in. I kiss him back. I kiss him back because it feels so good and I have no fucking self-control. Because it's James.

But then I come to my senses and break out kiss.

"James..."

"Julia."

"I'm with Nate. You know this."

"You don't have to be. You know this." He smirks. "Julia, remember the time I asked you for one month. Just one month to be with me and only me?"

I do remember. I almost lost James for good. Even as my best friend.

******

"I'm gonna need my best friend James, because.... I'm gonna go to the Avalon." 

"Is that why you're choosing Nate? Because he can pay for that?"

"James...." 

"Julia." He looks away.

"I'm not choosing Nate because of his financial status. I can't believe that thought would even cross your mind. Do you know me at ALL?"

"Then why, babe. Why are you choosing the wrong person? The harder lifestyle to handle? Aside from money, what the hell does he have that I don't? Because I'm never gonna understand this hold he has over you, and I'm never gonna stop loving you."

"And I'm never gonna stop loving him. Don't you get it? The way you're never gonna stop loving me... that feeling...that's how I feel about Nate. I'm never gonna stop loving him. It has ABSOLUTELY nothing to do with money. You know this. You know when I'm in the same room with you all I can think about is you and when I'm with him all I can think about is him."

"You need to give 'us' a chance, Julia. You haven't been with JUST me. You've been with Just him plenty. You've been with me yet living under his roof. You've been with me, yet fucking sleeping in his bed. Around him 24/7. It's suffocating you and clouding your thinking. God. You haven't even gone one day without seeing him."

He pauses. "God damn it Julia. Don't you remember when everyone wanted you to get admitted? I fucking drove you there and then bailed, we went to my house, remember?" He's raising his voice now out of desperation. "We stood there in the pouring rain right outside my house. You said everyone thinks you're too much to handle. And I said you're not too much for me. I said I can take care of you myself. Dammit Julia give me that chance!" He cries.

"You're not even giving me that chance now. Give us one month of you being with me and never seeing him. Not one time. And I bet you would choose differently. You'd be clearheaded. But no. You don't give me the chance. You've NEVER given me the chance!" James yells and I flinch at the sudden volume in his voice.

****

"Please. Hear me out." He says while his lips gently peck all over my face.

"One month. Julia, that's all I'm asking. Give me one month. Then decide." He kisses all over and I feel myself stirring while he's still inside me. "Give me the chance. I deserve that much. If I can't take care of you after one month then you can choose Nate." His eyes soften as he attaches his lips to my skin in between sentences. "If I can't help you, I'll let you go. We'll still be friends. I'll know I tried my best and it didn't work."

"James..."

"If it doesn't work, I'll be able to sleep at night knowing I at least got the chance to try." He hardens inside me again and pushes in and out of me slowly. I gasp at that sensation.

"Baby, please. One month." James kisses me so passionately my body tingles right down to my core and my hips tick up. He quickens the pace while his eyes are locked with mine.

"One month. Then I'll let you go."

*******

Of course I remember. There's no way I could forget that. But it also brings my eyes to water. There have been so many times I've come so close to losing James. Whether it be him walking out, the car accident, the coma, and now I could have lost him if he went to prison.

"I never got my one month with you." James brings me back to the here and now. He gazes down at me while we lay in the grass, his hand still on my cheek. "Maybe this is a God thing. Maybe this needed to happen so I could get my one month with you. Because you would never give it to me, He had to force it."

He's serious.

I furrow my brows and sit up. "Is that what this is?" I push his hand away, catching him off guard with my change in mood. "Did you choose your house arrest here just to fucking prove yourself to me? To get your fucking 30 days, James?"

"What? No!" His eyes widen. "Julia. No."

Mike leisurely walks out for a smoke but I pay no attention to him.

"Cuz that's what it sounds like to me, now. You don't want to be here at all. You just wanted to win me over like I'm some goddamn prize!" I stand up.

"Oh boy." Mike turns around to go back inside, now hearing the conversation escalate.

"No, you stay. I'll go." I walk past Mike but not before I give him a swift push to his chest for no reason at all. I go inside and slam the glass door with a huff.

Shit. 

I can't leave James. He can't even turn the knob to the door. I would never just leave him out there like that. I drop my shoulders in defeat and open the door back up, walking back to James, who's now standing while Mike puts the dog's leash in his hand for him.

"UGH!" I stomp over to James and grab his hand. "I can't even fucking storm away. I can't leave you here by yourself. God, you make me so mad!!" I take the dog's leash out of his hand and wrap it around mine and drag him inside with my other hand.

"Bye you fucking hot mess." I hear Mike yell from outside as I slam the door.

"Are you fucking laughing??!!" I look up to see the smirk on James's face.

"A little babe. Just a little. God, I love you."

I squint my eyes at him. "You're lucky you're disabled and I have a heart, or I'd leave your sorry ass out there." I drag him and stomp angrily to my apartment. Once inside I get Maggie out of her harness and pour some water in her bowl for her. Paul is at the kitchen table reading the fucking newspaper, paying no attention. 

"He's all fucking yours." I rip the paper out of Paul's hands and throw it on the ground harshly before going to my room and slamming the door like a child.

********

*Nate*

"Lover's quarrel." Paul chuckles. "It's gonna be a long six months for James with Julia's mood swings. He's not used to this as much as I am."

James fell asleep on the recliner with the dog, so I quietly lean my guitar case against the couch and head to Julia's room.

I open the door and study the lump under the covers.

"James. Go."

"You think James could open this door, doll?" I close the door behind me and kick off my shoes. Julia whips the covers down from over her head, her ponytail now falling out and hair a mess.

"Go home, Nate." She pulls the covers back over her head.

"Oh no you don't." I slide under the covers and tickle her. She absolutely HATES to be tickled. It's like the worst torture and Julia is extremely ticklish.

"No. Stop!" She laughs uncontrollably while still trying to be mad. We are both fully under the covers and the way the sun is shining into her window it illuminates us under the pretty pink blanket. I pull Julia in against me and kiss her perfect lips.

"What happened? You sound like you're PMS-ing like Trisha though I know for a fact you don't get your period."

"Why are you here, Nate?" Julia pushes her now staticky hair away from her face while we remain under the blanket.

"To make out with you." I peck her lips, then her cheek, then down her neck.

"All you men are the same." She closes her eyes but gives in, threading her fingers in my hair.

"Did Gallo try to get into your pants? Is that what that was?" I roll on top of her and slide my hand into her pants and straight to her core, making her gasp.

"Nate." She breathes out when I feel how wet she is and begin working her nerves. "The door."

"James is napping and can't turn a fucking knob, love. And Paul knows better..." I kiss my way down and lift her shirt up to kiss her stomach.

"I'm pretty sure this isn't making out. Making out is just...." She gets sidetracked when I yank her pants and underwear down and off her and kiss her inner thigh. "Kissing."

"I AM kissing." I nibble and then suck on the soft flesh of her inner thigh before hiking her leg up. The second my tongue touches her core she pulls my hair and arches her back.

"Oh God." She whispers. "What has gotten into you?"

I hum an "I don't know" against her nerve making her body quiver against my mouth. First, James is a somewhat free man. Anyone else would think House Arrest would be an awful punishment. Not James. 

Then, I had a great session at the studio, wrote an entire song, and now I'm going to have a great session with Julia at The Avalon, before my AA meeting later this afternoon. That's what's gotten in to me.

*******

*Julia*

"They're ALL sleeping." Nate comes back into my room with two water bottles and closes the door. James, Paul AND the dog all fell asleep in the living room. Everyone is beat from the last few weeks of life. They have no idea Nate and I just had sex in here.

Nate hands me a water and crawls back into bed, pulling me in against him.

"I want to stay just like this forever." He kisses the top of my head and closes his eyes.

"You want to stay at the Avalon like this? Forever?" I tease.

"Yep. Right here. Just lay in this bed forever. We don't have to leave the apartment. Ever."

"I think that's a mental illness. Agoraphobia." A laugh comes out of Nate when I say this. He rolls on top of me and pins my arms up above my head. Usually, this would trigger something awful in me, but it doesn't, and I smile. I'm healing a little.

"Maybe that's what I have. Maybe I have Agoraphobia and need to live here with you right in the room forever and ever. We can get anything we want delivered to us and have sex all day and night." He bites my neck before kissing it.

"I don't think there's room on this bed for me, James AND you. I mean... we can make room and all-" I turn Nate off who rolls his eyes and rolls over so I'm the one on top. My hair splays around his face as he rounds his back off the bed to kiss me.

"Donovan's holding back. I bet he's got bigger apartments here. Another bedroom for Paul or something."

"Yeah, I am NOT asking him, Nate. That means I'd owe him. I don't want to owe Jeremy anything."

That's just asking for trouble.

********