*Nate*

I bang on Jeremy's door knowing he's inside thanks to Nurse Amy telling me his shift has ended. Julia is now with Mike, attempting to eat something and I left Paul in her room alone. I told him I had to use the bathroom but instead- Here I am.

I bang again and the door finally opens. Jeremy is no longer dressed for work. He's in a grey Harvard sweatshirt and running pants.

"Nate..." He pauses. "Um... my shift is over but Doctor Co-"

"Jeremy..." I cock my head at the doctor. He knows it's him I want to talk to. Not my fault he lives here and is easily accessible.

Jeremy lets out a sigh and opens the door more to let me in. I hate his guts but need his help.

"You know, you shouldn't be in here. You guys shouldn't even know this apartment exists." He turns around and heads to the kitchen. He was in the middle of cooking pasta and homemade sauce.

"You shouldn't do a lot of things- but here we are." I retort while watching him stir the sauce. The aroma fills the apartment, and I now realize I haven't eaten much today.

"She made a mistake." I say while leaning against the kitchen island with my arms folded. For a rapist his apartment looks normal. I don't know what I was imagining but a clean, modern apartment wasn't what I had in mind.

"How so?" He adjusts the stove down to a simmer and turns around.

"She doesn't want to live here full time. Jeremy, you know that. She wasn't in the right frame of mind."

"Julia came to me telling me the opposite. We sat with the director who explained everything, and Julia signed all the forms. She was calm and of sound mind when she made this decision."

"She's NEVER of sound mind!" I glare at him. "You know this! She can't make big decisions like that. Again, you know this!"

"I do know this." He sighs. "Julia needs a medical proxy. She needs someone who is legally authorized to make medical decisions on her behalf due to her illness."

"Then I'll be her proxy." I throw my hands up in the air.

"You need to go through the court system for legal documents. It's called a "Health Care Proxy" or "Advance directive" document. Until then, you cannot be Julia's proxy or make decisions on her behalf."

How the hell does Jeremy know all this legal stuff? Is this him helping me or is there something behind this I'm not aware of? I can't trust him.

"I'll do whatever it takes, then. But she's not living here."

"Until you provide the documents, she sure is. Nate. Do what's best for Julia. Bipolar is no joke. Mania is no joke. Psychosis is certainly no joke. These are serious conditions. How she went so long being undiagnosed will forever be a mystery to me. But she's here now, wanting to get help and treatment. She wants to live a normal life, and she can achieve that with the right tools."

"She can't live a normal life with you in it."

"She can always choose to go to a state facility..." He raises his eyebrows at me and turns back around to stir the sauce.

Jeremy knows I'm well aware of these facilities. That's why I have Cara here. The best place for her with the best care. I can't fathom putting Julia in one of those places. She wouldn't survive and that's a fact.

"You know Julia wouldn't do well in a state facility."

"I do...." He says calmy, pissing me off even more.

"God, You're so frustrating to talk to!" I burst and drag my hands down my face. "Just find another job somewhere else or something!"

Jeremy chuckles just a little and turns back around to face me.

"Are you aware of the Avalon's history, Nate?"

"What?" 

Where the hell is he going with this shit?

"The Avalon. This place right here. Where I work. It was founded by my grandfather, thirteen years ago. Ava- that's my mother's name. WAS my mother's name. Her maiden name was Lonaire." He pauses. "Avalon is part of her name. My grandfather funded this because my mother had mental illness, and he wanted the best of the best care for his daughter. He hired only the best of the best physicians and staff at the time."

I stand straighter, baffled by what I'm hearing.

"He purposely made this facility on the west coast. Far away from my father. He knew what was going on. He even designed these specific apartments within the Avalon for family to live and be close to their loved ones. That was the goal, at least."

I'm dumbfounded by this story and follow Jeremy with my eyes as he continues to cook his meal and talk.

"My mother took her life right before the Avalon opened. She had no idea my grandpa was going to help her get away from her abusive husband. I had no idea because I was in college."

I remain speechless and Jeremy goes on while boiling some pasta.

 "Three months later my grandfather died of a stroke. He never even got the chance to step foot in the facility when it was finished."

"Wait. What? Did he pass this place down to you? Do YOU own The Avalon??"

Jeremy lets out a forced laugh that fades quickly.

"No. He didn't want to put such a big burden on me. The place became well-known very quickly in the celebrity world. Rich people around the world would come here to get top- notch care from highly qualified doctors. My grandfather wanted me to finish school and become a doctor to work here. I couldn't do that if I owned The Avalon. In his will, he gave it to some cooperate business he trusted, and they run this place. I get a portion of the funds, but I don't run the place or make the big decisions or anything like that. Other than hire and fire people. They have a team for all that financial and political shit."

"So that's why you work here? A family business? Even though your mom isn't even alive anymore? Why? You can still get a job anywhere in the world, you're a smart man." I push on, hoping there's a way to get Julia the help she needs without Jeremy here with her.

"This isn't just some job. Some building. Some group home or some detox facility. This place means something to me. It could have saved my mother's life if she didn't take matters into her own hands. Had she known about her father's plans she wouldn't have committed suicide. I have to believe that. This place could save Julia's life." He looks over at me now. "I'd give her one of the apartments to live in. To make her feel like she can live alone and have a place of her own but still get the 24/7 care she needs."

I look around the apartment. It's a decent sized place. It has a ton of natural light with the back wall mostly windows and even a slider that leads out to a private porch and yard. It has a separate entrance with one parked car in the lot. From what I can see through the window. A Mercedes sedan. That must be Jeremy's. The place is bright and modern, and you would never know the door behind me leads to a mental facility. I don't know what the bedroom and bathroom look like, but I don't want to know...

"She's not living here permanently, Donovan. Not with you around." I can't give in on that. I just can't.

"She's not living at all right now, Nate."

*******

My mind is spinning during my AA meeting. I haven't paid attention to two words the therapist has said so far.  All this information about the Avalon being here because of Jeremy's own mother who had mental illness. How this place was going to save her. Save her from her husband. Save her from herself.

But she never got the chance to see it. She never got the chance to get the help needed. She took her own life before she ever got the chance to heal.

Paul is outside in the hall, not being allowed to go into group sessions. Mike is somewhere probably puking his brains out and Cara is in a different session.

 Julia sits next to me, but I can tell she's not paying attention to the speaker either. Her mind is ALWAYS spinning. She has no idea I went to Jeremy's. She has no idea about the Avalon's history.  She has no idea about Jeremy's offer to one of the in-house apartments. If Jeremy didn't work and live here, one of those apartments would be perfect for Jules. She could have her own space. She could still live a normal life, run errands, have a place to call home. Not a room at the Marriott or James's house or my flat. A place of her own. She could do all the things everyone else in the world gets to do and still get all the care and therapy she needs along the way. Bipolar is an ever-changing disease that requires persistent care and persistent medication changes. Julia could get all that and more here. In a safe environment where she can be monitored. It would have been perfect for Julia if Donovan wasn't her next-door neighbor.

God why the hell did he have to go and fuck everything up for her?!

I drop my head and pinch the tension between my eyes.

"Are we boring you, Mr. Hollan?" The old man who clearly looks like a recovering addict himself cocks his head at me. This group is small today, less than 20 in the room, and all eyes gravitate to me.

"No, sorry. Proceed." I lower my hand and sit up straighter. The man continues the session, and I now feel like a high school student who just got in trouble in class. If my sister were here, she'd be cackling loudly right about now, disrupting the class even more.

All I can think about is the Avalon. I need to tell Jonah this. He will know what to do. He always knows what to do.

******