*Julia*

Mike Maloney kissed me.

And I didn't back away.

Do I ever, though? This is me we're talking about. The woman with no boundaries. And I'm not going to lie. It felt good. Real good. I know I'm not right in the head. I know I'm far from thinking clearly right now. I also know I'm a little pissed at both James and Nate for giving up on me.

After Mike kissed me, neither of us said a thing. We stayed silent the whole time, and Mike eventually fell asleep with his head leaning on my shoulder. I knew he was exhausted. I know he's not sleeping at night right now. So, I left his room to give him some rest and headed to the rec room, with Dante following me, of course. I look around the empty room and spot the computer in the corner.

I wheel my IV pole over and sit down. The first thing I type in is Nate Hollan world tour, just to see where he is at. He's in Amsterdam for the week, and I watch one of the short interviews with him and a reporter. Nate looks good. He's beaming with pride over how well his tour is going, taking in all the love from his adoring fans. Nate is in his element. Right where he belongs, doing what he loves. I doubt he will reach out to me today. It's probably late at night where he is, and usually, he calls Paul first. Now that Paul is home with the flu, I don't foresee hearing from Nate. Not through Dante, that's for sure.

I scroll through some other interviews and write ups, and my eyes focus on one. It shows that stupid older photo of drunk Nate kissing Trisha in the Modern Studio parking lot. The article goes on to talk about the Nate Hollan/ Personal Assistant Trisha banks timeline, attempting to dig deep to see if there is more to their relationship. Mainly because they have nothing better to talk about, so stir up old news like this when things are quiet. But then. I see a photo from this week. It's raining out, and Nate is holding an open umbrella in one hand and Trisha's hand in the other while they rush into a restaurant. Bodyguards in front and behind them. Jonah and Casey follow along, also holding hands.

Why would Nate be holding Trisha's hand? Is it just because it was raining, and he was trying to have her keep up with his long strides? Am I overthinking shit? I yank out my IV in a fit of rage, leaving the pole in the rec room, pushing past Dante, and stomping to my bedroom.

*****

*Nate*

"Does it always rain in Amsterdam?" Casey asks, watching the rain fall down from the balcony. It's getting late, and everyone is chilling out together right now before Jonah and Casey head back to their room.

"Not like this. This week was a bit of a bust, weather wise." Trisha sighs while boxing up leftovers from me, ordering the entire damn menu. "Jonah, take some of this food back to your room with you. I know you will eat it."

"You don't have to ask me twice." Jonah smiles, ready to feed that fucking tapeworm he has.

"I just got off the phone with Paul." Trisha looks over to me and I roll my eyes, still trying to wrap my brain around their past relationship. "It's Dante taking over for him right now. The Avalon sent him home."

"What?" I sit up on the couch more attentive now. I haven't heard from Paul much, now that I think of it.

"Yeah. Paul has the stomach bug. I guess it's going around the Avalon but since he has a fever he can't be in the building. He can't return until he is fever free for 24 hours, so he had to find someone to cover for him."

"Where the hell is Will??" I feel a pit in my stomach. I don't really know who Dante is. Though I trust Paul. He would only have the best of the best watch over Jules for me.

"He's out of town for the week. Death in the family. I know Dante is good though. You've had him before." Trisha says, trying to put my mind at ease. To be honest, I don't remember this guy, but I have had a ton of bodyguards over the years. I can't remember them all. "I'm sure Paul gave him the inside scoop. She's in good hands."

"Maybe you should reach out to Julia tonight, Nate." Jonah gives me a little look. He's not asking me. He's telling me. "You ready, Case?"

After Jonah and Casey leave, Trisha heads to the bathroom to get ready for bed. I take this moment to call Julia's phone and to my surprise she answers.

"Jules. Hi." I say, a little taken aback she picked up for me.

"What do you want, Nate?"

I drop my shoulders, hearing the attitude coming from Julia. "I just wanted to check in on you. I miss you, doll."

I wait for Julia to respond, in the meantime grab the remote and turn on the TV. Right as I see what I see, Julia answers.

"Do you, though?"

On the news is the picture of me holding Trisha's hand while walking into the restaurant yesterday. Shit. I don't even remember holding her hand......which isn't good. We're getting too comfortable.

"I do. Yes. And if you are reading into that dumb picture, I was just escorting her inside because it was pouring." I get right to it. I actually don't know why we were holding hands but need to come up with something.

"She sleeps in your bed with you, doesn't she? You guys are probably fooling around, huh?" Julia hangs up on me before I can say another word.

"Fuck." I pinch the bridge of my nose and try calling her back with no luck. Of course she's not going to answer me now. What the hell was I thinking?

******

*Julia*

The Avalon lights dim at 9pm like always and my anxiety kicks up a notch. I've never been alone in my room before but I sure as hell am not asking that guy Dante to stay in here with me. He sits in a chair outside my door just like Paul always did with anyone he was a bodyguard to on the 4th floor. I suddenly miss Paul.

I pace the perimeter of my small room knowing I'm not going to get any sleep tonight. I'm starting my detox...again...and being alone in here is creeping me out.

James has a hard time coming to The Avalon, so it is another day without seeing my best friend, Paul is puking his brains out somewhere and I'm currently pissed off at Nate so feeling pretty alone right now.

Seeing that picture of Nate and Trisha holding hands really got to me. It's silly, I know. I also sense Trisha wants more from Nate than just friends. I sensed that right from the start. She probably IS sleeping in his bed with him. They probably ARE fooling around.

"I need a distraction." I say out loud like the crazy person I am. I decide to open my door, making Dante stand and follow me down the hall. He doesn't ask questions. He doesn't say a word. He doesn't even know me. His job is to be my shadow and make sure I'm alive when Paul returns. That's it. He doesn't seem to care where I go or what I do. So, he doesn't question a thing when I open Mike Maloney's door and close it behind me.

"Um. Hi?" Mike looks at me while lying on his side in bed.

"He's so creepy. Dante. There's no way I'm getting any sleep with him guarding my door." I huff and lean against Mike's door. He smirks and props his head up with his hand, studying me.

"So, you came here? To another creepy bodyguard's room?" Jesus raises an eyebrow at me.

"I guess so." I fold my arms over my chest and look around, now wondering what the hell I am doing. Paul would NEVER let me come into Mike's room and close the door behind me like this. Not a shot in hell. "I need a distraction. This detox is going to be the death of me."

Mike nods, understanding how I feel, then.... he moves back a little in his bed and lifts the covers. I ring my hands nervously and my heart rate picks up in pace. I hesitate and Mike raises his eyebrows at me expectantly.

So, I do what Julia does best. I don't think about anything but this moment right here and walk towards the bed, sliding in next to Mike, letting him wrap the covers over the two of us. His body is warm but shaky like mine. I lay flat on my back and am suddenly nervous. Yet not nervous. It's weird and I can't explain it. I know I shouldn't be in Mike's room. I know I shouldn't be in his bed.

Yet here I am.

"I could use a distraction too." Mike whispers in the dark. I feel his hand slide under my sweatshirt to feel my bare skin.

He slowly traces up the side of my body and then realized I'm not wearing a bra. His thumb swipes across my nipple and I close my eyes. I feel him drop his forehead down and his beard touch my cheek as he caresses me. His breath hits my neck, and his hair falls into my face a little. I open my eyes to see that his are closed, with his lips parted and his heart pounding, like he's contemplating if he should be doing this. So what do I do? I slide my hand down and feel his length through his sweatpants, making his breath hitch and his eyes open to look at me. I nod slightly and feel him harden even more against my hand. Mike holds my face, and his thumbs stroke my cheek. The fire going through my veins right now is insane. Now, all my senses are awake. His dark eyes grow even darker and fall to my lips.

Mike presses his lips to mine gently and fireworks go off all over my body. Before he has a chance to pull away to see my reaction, I brush my lips against his and then kiss him back just as slowly. I put my hand on the side of his head, letting my fingers get lost in his long hair. We both pull each other in so my body is flush against his and continue kissing. I take in the softness of his lips as Mike rolls on top of me, pressing his hips into mine

"Mike." I look into his eyes when we break our kiss.

"Yeah?" He drops his forehead to rest on mine and closes his eyes again while grinding into me.

"Be my distraction."

For such a cocky, arrogant tough guy, Mike swallows hard with a nervous nod until I lean up and deepen our kiss, letting my tongue swirl around his, getting lost in the moment. We push each other's pants and underwear down and off and without any hesitation, I take the initiative and line him up to me.

"Whoa. Wait. I don't have a-"

"You don't have anything wrong with you, do you?" I ask the awkward question that needs to be asked.

"No, but-"

"Good. I can't get pregnant."

Not another word is said. He presses into me, stretching me to my limit and I drop my head and close my eyes tight, bending my knees to give him more access. A shower of sparks fly through my body in an instant, building and growing the deeper he goes.  I let out a frustrating sigh and feel him grab the back of my head and begin to thrust into me like I need him to.

"You feel so good." Mike murmurs huskily against my neck as he rounds his back and slams into me faster. They all say that.

A small whimper escapes my lips as I beg for more with my hips. Because HE feels so good. Like a shot of whiskey on an empty stomach, my whole body is on fire and his low moan goes straight to my head leaving me feeling dizzy with lust. As he thrusts into me, any last traces of sense or coherence that I had vanishes in an instant. I accidentally moan a little too loud and he smacks his hand over my mouth, shushing me.

My eyes widen in fear and tears build up instantly. Mike notices right away and immediately removes his hand, stilling himself while he studies my face.

"Shit. He really did.... didn't he? That sonofabitch." He looks at me with eyes full of sympathy for me. "We can stop if you want."

"No." I shake my head. I'm not letting Jeremy control this. No fricken way. "It feels good. Keep going." I tick my hips up, letting Mike know I need to feel this. While slowly pushing in and out of me, both hands on the sides of my face, this detoxing bodyguard kisses my forehead, my eyes lids, my cheeks and then leans in close to my ear.

"I will NEVER hurt you." Mike whispers and I melt into him.

We both pick up the pace as I feel my orgasm getting closer. Like a rubber band being stretched and ready to snap, the tension between my legs builds. The second I hit my high it takes over my whole body and I press my mouth to his shoulder to mute my sounds. And then, he loses himself.

Desperate, greedy and unrestrained, he held both my legs back and slammed into me again and again and again, making my legs quiver. My body is on fire with pleasure and the soft sounds that fill the air as he slammed into me only seemed to intensify that feeling. I come undone a second time and hear Mike curse under his breath as I tighten around him. He crashes into me and lets go with a loud gasp before lowering himself on to my body in exhaustion. A straight minute of silence goes by as we come down from our high.

"Oh God, marry me." He teases breathlessly with his hair falling down into my face. I remember Nate saying that as a joke once in the very beginning of our relationship and try not to think of him. Instead, I wrap my arms around this stranger I barely know.

Then we both freeze when we hear Jeremy's voice start talking to Dante.

"Shit!" I whisper and jump out of Mike's arms and into my sweatpants, not caring about my underwear. He scurries to get his own pants and kicks our underwear under the bed as I rush to the empty chair near the desk, almost knocking over the lamp. The second Mike pulls the covers over his body the door opens, and Jeremy is standing in the doorway.

"Julia. Out. Now." Jeremy gives me a stern look. His eyes darting from mine to Mike's across the room. He's not stupid. He may not know we had sex but can sense we were doing something with the way our cheeks are flush and hair disheveled.

"Why? I don't want to be in my room alone. We're just talking."

"Then I'll sit in your room with you." Jeremy furrows his brows. All the color drains from my face and I suddenly feel sick to my stomach. My heart begins pounding hard and it's noticed by both Jeremy and Mike now.

"No." I say quickly and stand up. "I'm fine alone."

I rush out of the room and head to mine, slamming the door and leaning against it, petrified. I cringe at the thought of Jeremy coming in here in the middle of the night, so grab my pillow and blanket and sleep on the ground, sitting up against the door in fear Jeremy would really come in at some point.

******

*Nate*

"You don't seem yourself today. You good, friend?" Jonah checks my blood pressure and hands me my medications. The girls are out shopping for God only knows what, so Jonah and I have lunch in the hotel cafe with Evan guarding.

"I think Team Nate and Julia have lost the game." I admit and frown while looking down at my phone. I've called and texted Julia multiple times with no answer. She is done with me and letting me know.

"In less than a week you will be off for three weeks. Maybe you guys just need to see each other and things will fall back into place." The nurse says while taking a huge bite of his sandwich and shoving fries in his mouth.

"You really may want to get that checked." I shake my head with a smirk while Jonah stuffs himself with food. He shrugs and continues to feed his face. "I'm just so tired." I admit.

"The three weeks will be good for you. You need the rest."

"No, I'm tired of fighting for Julia. Right when I think we are ok, something happens to pull us apart."

"Are you giving up on her, Nate?" Jonah puts his sandwich down and wipes his mouth with his napkin, giving me his full attention now.

"No. I mean, no. I don't want to. Things used to be so easy for us."

"They DID?" He raises a brow, reminding me things have NEVER been easy for me and Julia. Ever. We first had to hide our relationship, then dealt with the backlash when it became public, and it's been one thing after another. But now I feel like I am fighting WITH her just to BE with her. Before we at least fought our fight together but now we are fighting each other.

"I'm losing her Jonah. And it's not to James this time. I'm not losing her to another person. I'm just losing her in general." I push my plate aside, no longer hungry.

"It's just because of this distance. Once you are home it will be different. Don't give up on her Nate. She needs you. You know she does."

Does she though? Or does she just need someone, ANYONE willing to take care of her? What if that person is Paul? Or Mike Maloney? She's letting Paul care for her now and she's getting more comfortable around Maloney. 

Maybe Julia doesn't need me at all anymore.

*****

* Julia*

I hear...or feel... a knock on my door in the middle of the night and then Mike's voice. Again, my useless bodyguard doesn't say anything when I open the door and let Mike in. I push the blanket and pillow off to the side.

"Were you sleeping on the ground? Against the door??"  Mike asks, closing the door behind him.

"I was afraid Jeremy would come in. Paul usually stays in my room with me, but I don't want that Dante guy in here." I admit and watch Mike's eyes widen a little at how scared I was to the point I actually sleep against the door. Although if someone really wanted to come in that bad, they could easily push it open, whether I was against it or not.

"It was that bad, huh. With that doctor..." He whispers and I don't comment. I make my bed and sit on it.

"Well, it's after midnight and as far as I know, once he goes to his room or apartment or whatever the hell that is he lives in, he doesn't come out unless someone is crying or something."

I nod, knowing this, but a shiver runs through me.

"Anyway, I thought eventually you would need these." He holds up a pair of Avalon white underwear. "Sexy granny underwear they give you, huh?"

"Oh, most definitely." I smirk and grab the underwear, throwing it in the small hamper. If Mike only knew my Victoria's Secret matching cute underwear obsession I have....

"I can help you fall asleep. I won't let anyone come in. One good thing about years of training to be a celebrity bodyguard. We sleep with one eye open at all times."

I let out a slight sigh of relief.

"I'd like that." I admit and crawl into bed facing the wall. Mike lays down and pulls me into his body, wrapping his arm around me tightly.

"You fit perfectly like this." He says softly against my neck.

"Think we'll get in trouble?" I ask, now starting to fall asleep knowing someone is holding me.

"Probably." He laughs a little and his slight beard tickles my skin.

"Thanks for doing this, Mike." I close my eyes and drift off in the matter of minutes.

****

Jeremy didn't catch Mike sleeping in my bed with me. Mike left the minute he woke up first thing in the morning. But Jeremy knows something is up. 

"I think you're ready to be discharged." Jeremy looks at me in a reprimanding way while taking my temp. I no longer have a fever.

He wants me gone. Or wants me away from Mike. And there is no way Mike is ready to be discharged. I've barely started my detox, but Mike is in the middle of his. Plus, I don't know how long he is sentenced to be here. Me, on the other hand, I was just waiting for my UTI to clear up.

"Lets see how you do with breakfast before you get your hopes up." Jeremy says giving me mixed signals, leaving and slamming the door behind him.

He's pissed.

 Even more reason for me to hightail it out of here. But where do I go? I guess to Nate's. I'll have to call Paul and make sure he lets me in, if that is where he is staying. I haven't a clue. And do I uber there?  I have no money. Does Dante take me there? Do I call Nate to let him know? Or James? These little things run through my head as the idea that I could be discharged as early as this afternoon bounce around.  

It's the weekend so morning sessions don't start till after breakfast. It's a skeleton staff for nurses on the weekends as well. That means only the people really sick have nurses, the rest of us who know our way around follow the normal schedule without assistance unless needed. But Jeremy still comes around to document my food and decides to sit right across from me. Mike is on one side of me and the Bodyguard, Dante, stands at the end of my empty table with his arms folded across his chest, watching the room.

I freeze up mid bite of my cereal and find it hard to swallow.

"I don't think it's a good idea you two sit at the same table." Jeremy eyes us both. Mike looks up at him, but I keep my eyes on my food, drop my spoon and fidget with my hands under the table now.

"You'd rather me sit all by myself than have him sit next to me?" I mutter while staring down.

"You know what, Julia? It doesn't even matter. I think you are probably free to get discharged after breakfast. I just need to get ahold of Nate Hollan first since he is the one who pays your Avalon tuition. He has to approve of this as well."

"You're leaving today?" Mike looks at me now and I can almost feel Jeremy smiling. 

"Most likely. She no longer needs to be here." He says with satisfaction that he got under Mike's skin.

"Oh." Mike pauses. "Well. That's great news." He says and it comes out flat.

"Julia. Eat." Jeremy focuses on me now and I close my eyes.

"Can you just leave? So I can eat? I can't with..." I stop myself like Paul would. "I.... Can you just go?" I finally look up at Jeremy with pleading eyes. Please. Just get up and go. Please!

He studies my face and sees my bottom lip quiver. One thing he doesn't get satisfaction out of, seeing me cry because of him. Jeremy exhales sharply and stands up. 

"Ok, I'll come back in a little while to document your food intakes." He gives in and leaves me alone so I can eat.

"Prick." I say under my breath and Mike laughs a little before looking at me seriously.

"You get to go home.... that's good news." He says with a frown.

"Yeah, he's only doing it to punish the two of us. Separating us. He probably knows something will happen to make me get dumped back here sooner or later anyway. Something always happens. I've barely started my detox." I start eating now that Jeremy is gone but feel a little tug at my heart leaving Mike here now. My only friend. A guy I barely know but know well at the same time.

"You're going to take care of yourself while you detox right? Take your showers every day. Try and eat and sleep. I'm going to worry about you, Mike." I look over and feel Mike hold my hand under the table.

"Don't worry about me, ok? I'll be fine. I'm here for a while, regardless of my detox. But I'm gonna ask the same of you. Don't let your detox get the best of you, ok? Don't stop eating until you pass out or something stupid like that." Mike leans in closer to my ear.

"They don't know it, but I paid a guy to smuggle a cell phone in for me. I'm not supposed to have one but have one in my drawer under my clothes. If I give you my number, will you keep in touch?"

"Why am I not surprised you paid a guy to smuggle in a phone?" I laugh. "Yes. I will keep in touch."

*****

*Nate*

"Why the hell is he calling me?" I look at Jeremy's name pop up on my phone in shock. I had forgotten I had his number from way back when- when we actually trusted him.

"Let me." Jonah takes my phone while we sit in the Rec Room of the venue in Amsterdam.

"Hello?" Jonah answers my phone on speaker so Trisha, Casey and I can hear Jeremy.

"Is this Nate?"

"No. This is Jonah, his personal nurse. Is Julia ok?"

"Yes. But I was hoping to catch Nate so I can get his permission to discharge Julia. He is the one responsible for her payments here at the Aval-"

"I'm here." I quickly grab the phone. "Julia can be discharged????" I find this extremely odd seeing as Jeremy was adamant the longer she stayed the better.

"Yes. I think she has gotten all she can out of the Avalon's setting and to be honest. This whole thing she's got going on with another patient..."

"Wait. What the hell are you talking about Donovan??"

"Julia no longer has a fever. She would benefit from detoxing away from Michael Maloney, another patient in this facility. They have become......close... and it's frowned upon here at The Avalon. If Julia isn't going to take her detox seriously then we have nothing more to offer her here."

"What do you mean...close?" I pace around the room now feeling overly anxious. Something happened in order for Jeremy Donovan of all people to want to kick Jules out of the Avalon.

"Julia has been intimate with Michael.  Two patients detoxing at the same time, getting involved with each other is only setting them both of for disaster. Not only that, having relations in the facility with another patient is frowned upon."

Intimate?

Julia slept with Mike Maloney?

*****