LILY FOLLOWED JARED'S CAR. Huminto siya sa likuran nito nang dahil sa stoplight. Natanaw niya si Jared sa sasakyan nito. Medyo umangat ang ulo, sumilip sa salamin na nakabitin sa ibabaw ng dashboard. Then, he placed an elbow over the backrest of his seat.

Tinanaw siya nito.

Nginitian.

Lily smirked right back at him. He's checking on her and a sense of safety swept all over her.

Then this doubt.

She didn't want to fail him.

She didn't want to mess up again and disappoint a person she loves— something she was notorious for since she was, probably, born.

Lagi niyang nadi-disappoint ang mga taong mahalaga sa kanya— ang mga magulang niya, ang mga kapatid, ang mga nakarelasyon...

She always managed to please the men she fucked and experimented with at The Org. But that was just too shallow. Being a disappointment in everything except sex... Hindi niya matatanggap na hanggang doon lang siya.

Lily wanted to be good at other things other than that.

If Jared believes that there's something more to her than being everyone's disappointment and being good at sex, then she will keep on believing in herself. She will keep on believing that she can be good at other things. With something else.

She has substance...

She wanted to have substance...

I'm fine. I can do this, Jared. You believe that I can do this, right?

Napapitlag siya nang marinig ang caller ringtone ng smartphone. Napagawi sa dashboard ang tingin niya roon bago nagtapon ng nag-aalangan na tingin kay Jared. He looked at her, unaware of what she was dealing with. Nagtaas ng isang kamay si Lily, sumenyas dito ng sandali lang. Bago inabot ng isang kamay ang smartphone.

Maayos niyang nilagay iyon sa naka-install na phone holder sa kanyang kotse. Then, she answered the phone call from an unregistered number. Ini-loudspeaker niya iyon.

Lily.

That voice. Kahit hindi niya nakikita ang kausap, nai-imagine na ni Lily ang pagkakabusangot ng mukha nito. Mukha nitong kitang-kita dahil sa malinis na pagkaka ponytail ng buhok nito, lahat ng hibla ay hatak na hatak ng panali sa likuran ng ulo.

"Hi," she sighed in relief. "Akala ko, hindi mo na ako tatawagan ulit."

Gustong madaliin ng kanyang kausap ang phone call.

I already set an appointment for you, salubong sa kanyang pandinig ng baritonong boses ni Clint. He sounded a little static over the phone line. Atty. Kristen David is new to one of the law firms I work at. That's why, she has a lot of available slots for new clients.

Lily sucked in a deep breath. Hindi niya alam kung ano ang sasabihin. Parang naninikip sa tuwa ang kanyang dibdib. "S-Salamat—"

Hindi narinig ng kausap na nagsalita siya kaya nagpatuloy lang ito.

Specialized siya sa women's rights at kasama na roon ang karapatan ng mga babae pagdating sa employment so, you're lucky we got the exact person you'll need.

"My, my..." nangingiting wika niya. "Thank you, Clint—"

Ite-text ko sa'yo 'yong mga schedules niya sa firm na iyon. As well as her contact numbers. Kayo na ang bahalang magkasundo kung kailan kayo magmi-meet. She's expecting you to follow up within this day.

Saglit na nawala sa kasalukuyan ang atensyon at presensya ni Lily.

"I... I don't know what to say, Clint. I don't expect that you'll help me with this one... I..." napailing siya, nanginginig ang labi sa hindi maipaliwanag na abot-langit na pasasalamat. "I just want to thank you."

Damn, she already said thank you for how many times.

She heard his sigh. Most probably side-eyeing at her remarks. Ewan pero sadyang masungit kanya ang lalaki. Mula sa pagkikita nila sa townhouse ni Jared hanggang sa tono ng pagkikipag-usap nito.

Look, I am just helping you out dahil ayokong magkaroon ng sakit ng ulo ang kuya ko.

She had an idea. "How can I make it up to you? You know, pa-thank you sa pagtulong mong ito sa akin."

Just take my help and use that help so you'll don't mess things up. Especially for my brother.

Napatingin si Lily sa kotse sa unahan. Nasa harap na ang tingin ni Jared, nakaabang sa pag-usad ng mga sasakyan sa unahan... sa pagpalit ng kulay sa stoplight.

Lily stared at his form turned back against her direction.

Clint's voice echoed at the back of her mind saying don't mess things up. Saying Especially for my brother. Saying Ayokong magkaroon ng sakit ng ulo ang kuya ko.

A hopeful smile appeared on her lips. All of a sudden, the sun that managed to streak from her side of the window felt cheerful and warm.

"Of course, that's why I asked for your help... kahit hindi ko alam kung... kung papansinin mo ba o ano."

Nagtaka siya dahil pagkasabi niyon, natahimik si Clint mula sa kabilang-linya. His silence grew eerie as it took longer. Naalala niya bigla ang pagpunta nito noon sa bahay ni Jared. Ang pakikipagpalit nito ng kotse dahil may nagtatangka raw sa buhay nito.

Her heart pounded. "Clint?"

Hi, his voice sounded rushed, where were we again, Lily, I— a gasp. A smacking sound. A low grunt. Then a breathy sigh of resignation. Nena...

Pinamulahan ng mukha si Lily sa narinig.

The way Clint just mentioned Nena's name... soft and surrendering.

"Sorry for disturbing—"

Lily, paghigpit ng boses nito nang mabalikan siya. Sa palagay ni Lily, hindi hawak ni Clint ang cellphone kanina kaya ngayon lang siya nito direktang nakausap. Nena wants to get your number.

Napamulagat siya. "A-Ano—" Then she heard a honk from Jared's car. Napaangat tuloy siya ng tingin at nakitang umuusad na ang sasakyan nito.

Nakalingon sa kanya si Jared. Nang makitang nakatingin siya rito, binalik na nito sa harap ang tingin para maipukol ang buong atensyon sa pagmamaneho.

"Yeah, sure. Pero mamayang gabi na lang niya ako tawagan," nagmamadaling wika niya habang muling binubuhay ang makina ng sasakyan. "Nag go-signal na ang stoplight. I'm driving."

Sure. Bye, ani Clint habang nagmamaneho na si Lily. Pagkatapos niyon, ito na ang nagkusang i-disconnect ang tawag.

Naunang magparada ng sasakyan si Jared. Kumislap ang itim nitong kotse nang tamaan ng sinag ng araw. Pagkasara nito ng pinto, saktong nakababa na rin si Lily. Lalapitan na sana niya ito nang maalala ang cellphone na nasa holder pa nito. Yumuko siyang muli, kinuha iyon bago sinara ang pinto ng kanyang kotse.

Paglingon niya, wala na sa tabi ng kotse nito si Jared. Nagtatakang nilakihan niya ang mga hakbang para mahabol ito.

"Hindi mo man lang ako hinintay."

"This is an important day, Lily. Hindi tayo pwedeng makitang magkasama."

"Hindi pa naman ako didiretso sa Variant, eh. Mamayang 3 P.M. pa ang meeting ko, remember?" pilit niyang salo sa mga mata nito habang sinisiksik ang cellphone sa bitbit na puting pouch.

"Kahit na. Katapat lang nitong parking na ito 'yong building," diretso ang tingin ng binata.

"Ang layo-layo naman nito, no," pagsusungit ng kanyang tono habang pinapatungkulan ang pinaradahan niyang paid parking na isang tawid ang layo mula sa kinatatayuan ng gusali ng Variant. Minsan, doon pumaparada si Lily kapag wala nang maparadahan sa Variant.

Pero ngayong masisibak na siya roon, para sa kanya mas tamang huwag na niyang okupahin ang parking space na pagmamay-ari ng Variant.

Bakit ganito? I feel so faraway from him. Wala man lang pa-briefing ang lalaking ito na aakto siya ng ganito ngayon. Napalabi siya, nakatitig pa rin kay Jared. Samantalang kaninang umaga... ang sweet niya... Masungit na nag-iwas na siya ng tingin sa lalaki. She internally hmped as her strides lead her faster on the bright white-painted pedestrian lane that contrasted the gray asphalt of the road.

Napasigaw siya nang biglang hablutin ni Jared sa braso. Walang kamuwang-muwang sa nangyayari si Lily kaya hindi niya kontrolado ang katawan. Napaikot siya paharap kay Jared, paharang sa dadaanan nito. And it was as if an invisible force has pushed her to collide against his hard chest, his steely arms catching her.

Lily was afraid of collapsing, falling on the ground, so she flung her arms open then wrapped them around Jared's torso. She flinched because her nose hit against his shoulder. Nagmamadaling nag-angat siya ng tingin sa lalaki, napaawang sa gulat ang mga labi bago nanlisik ang mga mata rito.

"Jared, what the—" her own gasp cut her off. Lily noticed just now that dropped her white pouch. Pero nang lingunin niya iyon, saktong daan ng ilang mga sasakyan. All of them ran over her pouch that she dropped in the middle of the pedestrian lane.

The very sight made her flinch... then cringe as she slowly looked away from the road.

Narinig niya ang paghinga ng malalim ni Jared. His chest rocked against hers as she slowly dragged her eyes to meet his worried gaze.

"Pabigla-bigla ka na naman. Tatawid na lang ng kalsada..."

Dahan-dahang naghiwalay ang mga katawan nila. Kasabay niyon ang realisasyon tungkol sa pinoproblema niya kanina.

"I'm not with Jared now, right? I'm with the psychologist right now. Kaya ganito ang trato mo sa akin, right?"

Nagsalubong ang mga kilay nito. "What do you mean?"

"I get it now," she inhaled deeply and collected herself. Taas-noong binalik niya sa pedestrian lane ang tingin. Nag-aabang na lang siya kung kailan pwedeng tumawid.

"I hope you don't just get it," he spoke pleadingly. "I hope you understand me too."

Lumambot ang kanyang mukha, tinumbasan ang paglambot ng kanyang puso na kanina lang ay nagtatampo.

"Naiintindihan ko. We don't want people to think you're being biased, kaya hindi pwedeng magkaroon sila ng idea na may namamagitan sa atin."

"Exactly," anito at maingat na humawak sa kanyang siko.

Gulat na napatingin doon si Lily bago sa mukha ng lalaki.

Nasa harap lang ang tingin ni Jared. His aura started being shadowed by his cold, stoicism that if he were a color, Jared already turned into cement gray. A color that even the light from this morning's sun could touch but not lighten up... but not change.

Samantala, heto siya. Razzmatazz pink na pares ng blazer at slacks ang suot. Nasa ilalim niyon ang puting tube crop top. Its straight neckline decently covered her cleavage and breasts. She looked so alive, so vibrant... an energy competing the sunlight with her brightness. Her blonde hair shone against the sun in silvery yellow.

"I have to make sure you'll cross this road safely," alalay nito sa kanya. "Please, let me do this. Let me be your Jared for... a couple of minutes mo."

Lily looked away and allowed him to be. Before they even get to the middle of the pedestrian lane, Lily stopped and bent on her knees right in front of her ran-over white pouch. Kitang-kita sa nagusot niyong leather ang pagbubukol ng lamang gamit at marka ng tires ng dumaang mga sasakyan.

Nagmamadaling dinampot niya ang pouch at nagpatuloy sa paglalakad. Sa pagkakataong iyon, hindi na siya inalalayan pa ni Jared sa siko. He simply followed her tracks.

When they reached the other side of the road, Lily spun around to face Jared.

"Just as planned, I'll stay over at Velvet Hotel," banggit niya sa hotel na tatlong gusali lang ang layo mula sa Variant. Then, she gave him an underlook that complimented her teasing smile. "You can drop by on your lunch break, Jared baby. That is... if you want. Do you want to?"

She saw the movement of the lump on his throat, which widened her smile.

Hindi na rin niya hinintay ang sagot ng lalaki. Tumalikod na si Lily nung saktong sumagot ito.

"Oo."

Lily froze where she stood.

"Oo. Alam mo namang laging oo ang isasagot ko. Oo. Oo. Oo," anito sa mabigat na konbiksyon na siyang nanuot sa buong pagkatao niya. "Yes. Yes. Yes."

His intent voice tickled her in flattery and arousal. She could not help imagining what comes next after Jared's promise... Things that could happen when he drops by later in her hotel room.

Too bad she had to stifle her excitement for now.

Hindi niya ito nilingon. Humiwalay na siya ng tuluyan ng landas dito.

.

.

JARED SEATED ON LILY'S DESK. Mula nung umalis ang dalaga sa Variant, pwesto na nito ang pinagamit sa kanya ni Basil.

He managed to shove away his excitement. Inimbita lang naman siya ni Lily na kitain ito sa hotel mamayang tanghali. Hindi siya kahapon lang pinanganak para hindi maisip kung ano ang pwedeng kahinatnan ng pagbisita niya roon mamaya. Fuck his hard on. Hindi mawala-wala. Mula sa pagnanasa kay Lily hanggang sa pressure na nararamdaman habang dino-double check ang tinitipang evaluation.

Kailangan niyang ma-print out iyon bago mag-lunch break. Pagkatapos, mabigyan ng kopya si Basil at Miss Jackie. Pagkabasa ng mga ito sa evaluation report niya, magkikita-kita sila ng ala-una para mapag-usapang mabuti at mapaghandaan kung paano ia-approach si Lily mamayang alas-tres.

That was the plan.

Natigilan si Jared sa pagtitipa, binasa ulit ang report.

Hindi ko muna ipi-print. Kailangan ko munang makausap si Miss Jackie.

He saved the file, then put the desktop computer on standby. Habang papunta sa office room ni Miss Jackie, tahimik at abala na ang mga nadaanan niyang HR staff. Jared stopped observing the environment and knocked on Miss Jackie's door before peeking in.

Saktong angat ng tingin nito sa kanyang direksyon.

"Do you have a minute?" malumanay niyang saad.

Istrikto ang mukha ng ginang, walang buhay ang mga matang nakapukol sa kanya. Nagbaba ito ng tingin pagkatapos niyang magsalita. Napunta ang tingin ng matandang babae sa keyboards at nagtipa pa ng kaunti bago siya nito binalikan.

"Come in," click nito ng mouse bago tumayo mula sa kinauupuang swivel chair.

Jared stepped in and stopped in front of Miss Jackie's desk. Minuwestra ng HR Head ang kamay para ituro sa kanya ang kaliwang visitor's chair bago siya nito sinabayan sa pag-upo.

"What brings you here, Mr. Guillermo?" ayos ni Miss Jackie ng pagkakaupo, ingat na ingat sa unat na palda ng indigo nitong dress. Mataas ang pagkaka bun ng buhok nito, pulido at malinis kaya kitang-kita ang mukha nito.

He readied himself. "This conversation is for decency and professional sake."

Miss Jackie met his dark gaze. For the first time, the woman showed a genuine reaction.

A subtle intrigue that lifted one of her eyebrows. It sparked interest and put life in her cold, unaffected eyes.

And when their conversation was done, Jared left her office expressionless. Just a pair of two dark eyes hooded by a threatening shadow as his heavy strides tore the floor.

As he walked, everything that happened in that office flashed back in his mind.

"What do you mean, Mr. Guillermo? Gusto mo ba ako i-briefing muna tungkol sa evaluation mo bago malaman ni Sir Basil?"

He remained straight-faced. "Somehow."

Mahina itong natawa. "Come on. Just tell me already. Hindi lang preparations para sa meeting natin mamaya ang inaasikaso ko rito."

"I just want to know how to approach Basil."

Medyo hinilig nito ang ulo, nagtaka. "Why ask me that? You're doing fine these days... talking to Sir Basil."

"Matagal ka na rito sa Variant. Mas nauna ka pa nga kay Basil dito."

Her eyes narrowed, studying him. She was already growing cautious, stiff shoulders and motionless.

"Alam mo na ang pasikot-sikot sa kumpanya na ito. And I bet, you also know how Sir Basil's mind works professionally."

"You seem inconfident with how to approach him this afternoon. I wonder why. Ano ba ang nasa evaluation mo? Have you already named who did that defaming post? Are you going to confirm it today that it's Lily who did it?" Nanumbalik bigla ang lakas ng loob ng babae. Tumuwid ito ng upo at bahagyang nagtaas-noo. "Iyon ba ang dahilan kaya, nahihirapan kang isipin kung paano kakausapin mamaya si Sir Basil regarding sa evaluation mo? Dahil madidiin lang lalo ang kanyang kapatid?"

He felt heavy. He could not believe this woman has this unshakeable conviction that it will always be Lily who has the capacity to sabotage her own family and Variant. But Jared had to keep that feeling to himself.

"Well, based on my evaluation, someone has to know Basil so well professionally to be so sure they can pull off such a trick like this. Someone has to know that Basil depends more on his businessman instinct than logic. That person has to know that Basil depends on his instincts because he lacked the knowledge about business. And who else could that be?"

She grew aware. Her tone defensive. "Ano ang gusto mong ipahiwatig sa mga sinasabi mo?"

"That Lily is not behind all of this."

Miss Jackie lifted a sarcastic smirk, eyes were cold and condescending. "And you think Lily doesn't know how her own brother thinks?"

"On a personal level, probably. But on professional level, I doubt it," matapang niyang saad. "I've been observing Basil too. I have a lot of observations to back this up, but let's make it simple. His office room."

"His office room?"

"Ano lang ang makikita mo sa office room niya?"

Napailing ang babae. There was something mocking about the way she smirked at him. Most probably, Miss Jackie was already thinking he was being crazy. Creating drama.

"Obviously a desk. A chair. Some files. Some shelves."

"Exactly. Office things. Nothing personal. No family photos. Nothing customized to give you a hint of who he is in the personal level."

Naningkit ang mga mata nito.

"Which means, maybe, he's not the type of boss who behaves in the office the way he does in his house."

Nagbaba ito saglit ng tingin. Nag-isip ng mabuti bago magsalita. "It's me, right?"

He just stared, waited for Miss Jackie to continue. She proudly lifted her eyes on him once more.

"Sinasabi mo ang mga ito dahil hindi mo madiretsahang sabi na ako. Ako ang iniisip mong may kagagawan ng mapanirang post na iyon."

He just stared at her. He was expecting Miss Jackie to defend herself. At iyon ang hinihintay niyang gawin nito. Hindi niya sasagutin ang tanong ng babae dahil wala namang kasiguraduhan ang lahat sa totoo lang. Dumidiskarte lang siya ng paraan para makakuha ng insight mula rito.

Hindi niya inasahan ang pagak nitong pagtawa habang nakatingin sa kanya.

"Do you even have any proof? Mali iyang ginagawa mo, Mr. Guillermo."

His jaws tensed. Where does she get that confidence? That audacity could easily fool someone about her innocence, intimidate someone who thinks highly of Miss Jackie.

"As a Psychologist, you're not supposed to be judgmental, right?" She leaned nearer the desk to give him a closer, probing look in the eyes.

Sumalampak siya ng upo sa swivel chair, pinag-aaralan sa kanyang isipan ang mga inakto kanina ni Miss Jackie.

Samantala, hinubad ni Miss Jackie ang maskara nang umalis si Jared sa opisina nito. Throughout their conversation, she did not change at all— she remained cold and unaffected, feigning unawareness and confusion.

But as soon as Jared got out of her office, her lifelessness was completely gone. Napuno ng pagkabahala ang mga mata nito na siyang nagpalalim din sa mga pinong guhit na mahahalata sa mukha nito. She had a few more minutes before realizing things.

Nanatiling walang tinag ang lalaki sa kinauupuan nito. Dinadaan lang ni Jackie sa pakitang-kumpiyansa ang tensyon na nararamdaman. She had to show this Jared who's the authority in this department. How dare he accuse her of such a lowly act. Paano naisip ng lalaking iyon na ang isang nakakataas sa posisyon, ang isang HR Head, ay gagawa ng ganoong bagay?

Mapanirang post sa social media? Walang substance na rants sa social media? Gawain iyon ng mga immature. Ng mga wala magawa sa buhay. Ng mga walang professionalism sa katawan. Ng mga patapon na tulad ni Lily.

Anyone who sees that post should automatically have Lily in mind when they read that.

Not her. Not the respectable, reputable and professional— the most professional— employee of Variant like her.

Kaya paano dumapo sa isip ng Jared na ito na ang isang Miss Jackie ang may kagagawan ng post na iyon?

The audacity.

At lalong kumulo si Miss Jackie sa loob-loob dahil hindi nasindak ang lalaki sa tingin nito. He was as lifeless and emotionless as a block of gray stone wall.

"As a Psychologist, you're not supposed to be judgmental, right?" She leaned nearer the desk to give him a closer, probing look in the eyes. Her stare had to intimidate him. It has to work.

But she was only shook by his responxse.

"I'm sorry if you felt that way. I haven't said anything though about who's behind that post."

Fuck. Of course, he didn't. He haven't said it directly that he's accusing her.

Naningkit ang mga mata nito, humigpit ang pagkakatikop ng mga labi.

I'm not that stupid. I've been careful. Very careful. Pero nagamitan pa rin ako ng kung anong strategy ng lalaking iyon. He must have used some keywords. Some words to trigger something in my subconscious. Some words that triggered me to be defensive. Iyon ang gustong mangyari ng lalaking iyon, ang mailto niya ako. Ang magulo ang isip ko para maging defensive ako.

Mas nakakabahala ang pagdilim ng anyo ni Miss Jackie. Nagdilim nang maalala ang mga sinabi ni Jared...

"Well, based on my evaluation, someone has to know Basil so well professionally to be so sure they can pull off such a trick like this. Someone has to know that Basil depends more on his businessman instinct than logic. That person has to know that Basil depends on his instincts because he lacked the knowledge about business. And who else could that be?"

And what Jared said before that...

"Alam mo na ang pasikot-sikot sa kumpanya na ito. And I bet, you also know how Sir Basil's mind works professionally."

And one more thing...

"And you think Lily doesn't know how her own brother thinks?"

"On a personal level, probably. But on professional level, I doubt it."

She clutched her hand into a fist, stared at the closed door with contempt.