2. Ineluctable Truth

Amaravati

'You are responsible for it all!'

Maa screamed for the umpteenth time. 

In the past ten years, the arguments between Maa and Paa have been an everyday affair. It broke my heart to witness the once-in-love couple now tearing each other down. It broke my heart to witness my parents' crumbling marriage. I once dreamed of a marriage like theirs, and today, I dread running out of love.

'It's not the case, Niyati. It would help if you understood this better than all!' - this time it was Paa, his clangorous voice booming across the palatial hallways - 'Don't you try to blame me for something I never did!' - his decibel increased by the second.

'Really, you did not?' Maa accused.

My heartbeats quickened. My palms fisted and crumpled the ends of the silk saree I wore.

I could not afford to crumble in the hallway. Not as the Queen, a queen is ideal in her conduct.

Not before hundreds of people who perhaps looked up to me whether I was watched or not.

The doors leading to their chambers were open as the arguments were a sight to the naked eye. I sucked in a deep breath to calm my nerves, to quieten my raging heart that was disappointed and vulnerable towards the elders who crumbled in the weight of the past.

And before I could walk inside I saw Paa walking away while Maa was still there. I barely knew what to speak. But, I knew Maa needed a shoulder now. Mustering every bit of strength within me I walked up to her.

'Want to go on a walk?

The city bustled with shopkeepers and the subjects going about their day. Children played games on the street and the wise and old narrated tales of wisdom.

Maa walked by my side and occasionally praised me whenever a subject expressed gratitude towards me.  Pride and fondness shone in her eyes. 

I'm finally winning, perhaps. She's seeing me.

The path we took through the busy streets of Amaravati led towards the food stalls and restaurants. 

Aromatics filled the air as chefs whipped the best delicacies known to them with the five tastes known to mankind - sweet, sour, bitter, salty and umami. Each stall had its unique delicacies from across Bharata.

There were the sweet and decadent jalebis and rabdi from the north and the soft and comforting ragi balls served with a spiced broth made with lentils and greens with a kick of garlic from the south. There were the soft and juicy rasgullas from the east and the steaming hot dhoklas from the west - you name it and you found them here.

Amaravati was a melting pot for cultures across the country, sometimes even the world. 

'Do you want to have your favourite today, rani bitiya?' Maa asked.

A whirlwind of emotions stirred within me as I looked at her. The words she uttered were unfathomable. After all that happened earlier in the morning, I did not expect this. Yes, I brought her out for a walk to free her mind, but to have food outside was not on my list.

Perhaps impromptu plans did exist, just not in my world. Not for the past ten years since I took up the queenly duties. 

Is this real?

Can I be carefree again even if it's for some time?

Can I only be my Maa's rani bitiya for a day?

Can I? Can I? Can I? 

'Just like the old days?' I blurted out before I could truly process the words I uttered.

I craved for these days all these years. I missed my laado, but I missed Maa more than ever. 

Ever since that day, our family was broken. Irreparable cracks formed which only grew wider with time.

And when Maa finally asked I did not know what to feel.

Happy? Happy for the amends she tried to make.

Sad? Sad for the years lost in the abyss of the past.

Or angry?

But, angry for what?

'Yes.' Her voice gained the chirpiness that was lost in these years of grief.  'You know just me and you, the guards are off guard,' Maa chirped.

I giggled. 

That was alien? Alien? Had I forgotten this too? How much had I lost myself in the abyss of grief?

I didn't know. Nor would I know in truth.

For now, I would cherish my halcyon moments.

Walking to our favourite restaurant after years will be a core memory. 

I again held Maa's hand and walked in the streets of Amaravati like when I was little. Skipping along the stalls as I tried every delicacy under the sun. I had forgotten what it was like to roam around the streets without my guards or handmaidens. 

It was just me and Maa.

Maa and me.

Beautiful isn't it?

'Here, try this. This is the sweet variant of the sago dumpling' - Maa fed me with her hands - 'It has jaggery, dry coconut, and cardamom; everything that you love' - she fed me with all her heart.

My heart. Oh, my dear heart was bursting with joy and love for my Maa. 

I love you, Maa.

'Today will forever be my favourite day,' I grinned with the biggest smile I ever put up.

'Mine too,' Maa said with the same emotion. 'Sometimes it's important to leave the past behind and cherish the present. I'm sorry, rani bitiya' - tears brimmed her eyes. 

I felt a tug on my heart as her tears rolled down. Before those precious pearls touched the earth, I cupped them within my palms and spread them over my hair in reverence.

'Let's not dwell there, Maa. Let's just have our day.' I masked any visible sign of sadness.

And thus the day went beautifully. Maa and I walked around the city as we reminisced about the older days of joy and brought a lot of silks and jewels for everyone in the family.

'You know, your Paa will like this pearl set. He's always had a fondness for pearl jewellery,' Maa beamed and smiled ear to ear.

'Of course, he will,' I played along with a gentle smile. 

Their fight earlier in the day was struggling to resurface in my mind despite Maa's joyous mood and love for her husband. It's sometimes strange how something tries to be a reminder of your reality despite you wanting to run away.

I wanted them to stay together and feared their separation, and yet there was a part of me that wanted them to be fulfilled as individuals. It's strange, maybe that's me as a daughter but as a woman, I only wanted to know the deepest secrets of her heart and sometimes even a little away from Paa whenever he screamed at her.

It was difficult to be a witness to the turbulent phase of their marriage. They loved each other to this minute, it was in the small gestures; I saw them do those sweet little nothings for each other. It was a heartwarming moment but the other they were screaming off their lungs and accusing each other of something - I didn't know what exactly it was but the change came after that unfortunate day.

The day that changed our lives for the worse.

'We've found her. Deepa and I would fetch her. Leaving Amaravati, in three days,' a masculine voice whispered in my ear bringing me out of the rabbit hole I entered.

Before I recognised or caught him; he vanished in thin air.

We've found her.

Deepa and I would fetch her.

Three days.

Laado.

There goes the second chapter!!

Let me know your thoughts about the chapter and Aaradhya

Do vote and comment your thoughts on the chapter.

Love Siya