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~~~

"Death knows it's painful for the living to admit that it makes life matter more. But the dark was a constant supporter all along, it didn't end anything. Light was the one who chose to leave. And if light was a guy and darkness was a girl, then he's just another him who leaves a her behind."

~~~

Jihye

It's awkward, so awkward.

That was it, the understatement of the year! I shove a spoon of rice into my mouth and keep my eyes glued to the food over the table, not my eating companion.

How I wish Sungyeol would do the same, I check if there was food on my face for the umpteenth time, my hair was in a simple loose ponytail. All in all there was nothing to explain why he won't stop looking at me.

He's barely eating, it's not that I'm an expert profiler but when it comes to a meal it's obvious who's sitting to eat and who's doing nothing but staring at people. I hate those people.

As much as I wanted to just crawl in my bed, away from his intimidating gaze, I couldn't get myself to leave when I'm hungry. It's my stomach, and she won't back down because someone doesn't know how to have a mean with someone. I made a mental dance when I was done and looked up at him and he wasn't eating again, "Are you done?" I'm not sure if I meant it but my voice comes out chipped.

"Yeah."

Too much for a reply, I sigh lightly. I'm not complaining. I take all the dishes to the sink and wash them quickly, I never felt comfortable around my savior before.

My savior. I came to a conclusion that he's worthy of the title, no matter how much we don't get along I still owe him my life..."Thank you." the words leave my lips in another sigh and I shock myself.

"For what?" It's too late to back out because he catches what I said and replies. I dry my hands and turn around to look at him. I should just carry on.

"For saving me, Sungyeol." May as well say it once and for all.

He shifts on his feet. He looked so adorable, his cheeks had a light tint of pink to them and I was sure I'm seeing things. It had to be the weather, he's pale enough.

~~~

The weekend goes by, Sungyeon forcing me to go shopping with her and getting me a phone would be the most eventful. Me sleeping and eating, also slacking on homework and studies till Sunday would be the best.

Not seeing Daeyeol even once because had exams coming up would be the worst. I feel bad for him. Although we have exams coming up as well, it's different when someone else is suffering through the misery. I told Sungyeon to stop by a bakery so I could get Daeyeol a muffin to boost his mood for his exams, I saw a delicious chocolate cake and got four pieces for Janna, Zoha, Daeyoon, and me.

"Daeyeol!" I shout when I spot him walking beside his brother. He turns to me and I take his muffin out of the box, "got you this," I push my hand towards him, "you can ace those exams! Believe in yourself, if not believe in the muffin." I joke lamely.

When he laughs, I feel very glad. My eyes lock with Sungyeol for a while but Daeyeol's hug breaks it off, "I got two Noonas now, feels refreshing! Thank you Jihye."

If someone else can adopt this mindset as well, my life would be so much easier. I smile my thoughts off, "What do I say, no one can resist my charm." I say fanning myself as we both end up laughing.

"Yeah right." he ruffles my hair, the gesture seemed drastically wrong.

"I'm the older here, it's supposed to be the other way around!" I complain, fixing my hair.

Daeyeol rolls his eyes and notices the box in my hands, "who are these for?" He asks eagerly, for some reason my eyes flicker towards Sungyeol and I see his expectant face. Such a child.

I should give him mine, it's my fault for giving a pastry to Daeyeol ins front of Sungyeol when I had nothing for him. "Oh um, here you too." I give Sungyeol my chocolate cake.

I hope he hates chocolate. I hope he hates chocolate. I hope he hates chocolate. I chant inside my head but the acceptance his face wears strips me of my hopes.

He nods subtly, "Wah, you're an angel Noona," Daeyeol praises. Of course I am! It's my chocolate cake. Who gives that away? I feel like crying on the inside. However, I smile back and wave him off. When I started walking to class, Sungyeol tags behind.

~~~

Around two weeks pass and Sungyeol keeps acting weird, when Sungyeon doesn't give me a ride back and we walk together, it would always be dead silent. It's not as intimidating as it used to be because I got my phone now, I developed a fond feeling for rap music and hiphop, as if I've been obsessed with these my whole life. Which night as well be true.

You never know. I would plug in my earphones and listen to music, sometimes hum along but I restrain most times. We don't want my savior to see that. He wouldn't go back home till Sungyeon comes back, either he's on his phone after we have lunch or he's passed out on the couch.

He always looked worn out, wjich made why he stays even more confusing. All aside, one time I couldn't hold back the urge to fix his posture and get a blanket to cover him and his groan sounded very unique to him when I laid his heavy head on the pillow, touching him made me feel tingles. I could close my eyes and know it's him, that's how memorable the sounds he made felt.

He looked so harmless and sweet in his sleep. I didn't notice why I smiled.

I moved a strand of the hair on his forehead to get a better view of his long eyelashes, and his eyebrows. How can a cold bastard be so handsome? I realized what I was doing and backed away.

Snap out of it, Jihye. I must have been some kind of sick teenager. What the helľ.

Another school day, the friends I had were the only things that kept me pushing. But today was meant to be different. I sit in my seat exchanging notes with Janna, given how quiet Janna is and how I always answer the questions the teachers direct to me our desk gets the least to no attention at all.

We thank the heavens for such perk and spend our time talking through notes. I was halfway through writing Janna a reply when I heard the Science teacher ramble about a group project.

"At last, I would like to announce the arrangements for the project due next week. You will work in pairs, hope you all work fairly with your partners."

I nod as my pen hovers over the paper, the feeling of relaxation and content I develop because I will probably be paired up with Janna comes to an end when the teacher starts talking again.

She starts a list of names that I don't bother to pay attention to until she shocks me, right on the spot, "Kim Janna with Kim Myungsoo, Kang Zoha with Lee Howon." My two friends are taken! Heck, oh wait maybe I'll be paired up with Daeyoon. That won't be bad.

"Ahn Daeyoon with Jung Dongwoo,"

No. No. No.

Maybe Sungkyu or Woohyn?

"Kim Sungkyu with Nam Woohyun."

Janna and I lean back in shock for very similar reasons. The teacher goes on with the rest and I wait patiently for my name, "that's it right?" She asks. I frown and raise my arm.

"You didn't say my name Miss."

"Oh! Jihye, the new student. Well not new anymore." She laughs nervously, "I apologize, so uh, the only one left to pair up with you is..." Her eyes move over the paper in her hand till they light up.

"Min Jihye with Lee Sungyeol."

~~~~

The whole class left, she left with Zoha and Daeyoon, who's Zoha's best friend. I stayed to talk to Sungyeol, I felt obliged to apologize and tell him that I won't annoy him. Thankfully, he was still in his seat. Waiting, as if he knew I needed to say something.

I was still collecting the shredded pieces of my courage and getting rid of the overload of nervousness I had. But soon he grew impatient. I heard his chair creek and he walked to the door, slowly.

No, wait.

Wait!

I stood up quickly and walked till I was behind him, "wait,"

"What is it?" His voice was monotonous, I felt blocked out right away and it made everything worse.

"About the project,"

He looked at me sideways, I moved to the side so I was face to face with him and hung my head low.

"I know-- I know that I'm a burden on your family but I can't do anything about it yet. I'm sorry, can't you just give me a chance?"

My breath hitched when he took a step forward towards me. It was when he continued that I couldn't breathe, I felt flustered. My heart was beating so fast against my ribs that it almost hurt. I stepped back, he took a step forward. So it went on, till the small of my back hit a table and I knew there was no escape. I'm glad I'm looking down, looking into his eyes now wouldn't help in anyway.

He crushed my hopes when his fingers touched my chin, his index and thumb pushing it up. I felt self-conscious for some reason, I knew there was a reason why... but I couldn't remember. When I look at his face my heart stops, just for a split second, before it begins beating again, in full speed.

I muster all the courage I could and mutter, "W-what are you doing?" I couldn't help the stuttering.

"I'm giving you a chance, didn't you ask for it?" He smirked, his voice sounded low and strong. I couldn't keep my composure.

Too much.

He was too close, his torso was touching my stomach and his kneecap was on the side of my leg. I hugged guys, I talked to them. But this, this was a whole other level. What's happening. When I thought I was going to lose my sanity he backs away racking his hand through his soft hair.

"We could work on it everyday after school in Sungyeon's apartment." his tone wasn't questioning.

Nonetheless I replied, "okay," I was struggling to breathe and the breath I didn't know I was holding came out when I regained my personal space.

My exhale was loud, even he heard it because he looked at me then shook his head. As if getting rid of an insane thought of some kind.

And it was that moment when you look at someone and wonder what is going on inside their head.

~~~

We needed to buy the things we still need for our project, so we stopped by a store. But around ten minutes later we were still in the charts section, debating.

"The bigger the chart the higher the grade." Sungyeol remarks. This is absurd. It's true that I owe him so I can't be rude he is just wrong.

"I don't know, listen." I grit my teeth with a smile, "It all depends on how good we could make it look and how precise our data could get. The size isn't important."

"I don't think so..." I can swear there was an expression of relish on his face. Why does it look like he's enjoying this?

"Okay okay, we need to get the markers and the rest of the tools." I try end it there.

"Are you nervous? Or scared of me? Or maybe obsessed."

I coughed, chocked. Egocentric much?

"I-I..."

"Don't worry, I don't mind it. You can stalk all you want, since we started on the wrong foot I will give you that as compensation."

"A chance of stalking you is my compensation?" I ask.

"Yeah,"

No thanks, "uh, I don't-"

"I don't mind you."

I nod. A strange feeling of relief taking over me and I fight the urge to smile from ear to ear. When he was convinced that we got all what we needed and we paid the bill, he took all the bags and went out, stopping briefly for me to follow.

Just like everytime we walked silently with only the sound of plastic bags in the air, I could tell Sungyeol was thinking about something, deeply. So I watched his way to make sure he doesn't hurt himself.

There was a puddle of water ahead of him, his eyes were clouded and glassy making it obvious he wasn't aware of it. I grinned and caught his arm pulling him in front of me, then I caught his other arm so I was in control of his movement.

He blocked all my vision, all I could see was his wide shoulders so I leaned to the side, subconsciously leaning my chin beside his arm. I felt him tense under my touch and breathe heavily, hich made me involuntarily giggle, "are you scared now?"

I don't know where the confidence and playfulness came from, I was awestruck myself. He scoffed, I felt relieved that he took the matter lightly. The rest of our routine went ritually, over lunch in the middle of me eating oh-so-ladylike I would catch him looking at me. As if I was a problem he needed to solve.

After our meal we sit on the floor, thankfully this time I wore some black slacks and a long sleeved violet top.

"What department do you recommend?" I started putting the markers neatly beside each other while he sat silently beside me.

"Biology."

"Same, not bad. Which chapter should we pick?" I ask, taking my book on my lap and flipping through it. He moves closer, I felt his breath on my neck. Although my heart was racing I ignored it, "this one?" I stopped flipping, god knows what chapter it was.

"Nah." He replies calmly.

"Hmm." His chin touched my shoulder when he nodded, my breath hitched again. Why do I keep reacting to him being near me.

"This one?" anatomy wasn't my favorite but I was just asking because I couldn't really focus.

"What do you think?" I felt flustered at the question directed to me.

"Hm, let's go with physiology. If you don't mind." I say, skipping through the pages.

"Yeah, sure." He replies leaning back on his propped arms. I smile.

"Let's start then."

~~~~

I'm going to make your hearts flutter really soon, the chemistry is just starting to appear. Look forward.

This book won't be only focused on Sungyeol and Jihye by the way. Oops, shouldn't have said that. Lol. You will know what I mean soon. I repeat there are a lot of plans waiting to be displayed. And we have lots of people in this story, but they will appear each at a time.

Thank you for reading, vote and comment to make me write more and update often♡♡

See you next chapter buffs♡♡''