14
november nineteenth

Open Houses, in general, weren't my cup of tea.

The ones I was used to were filled with smug parents who were all-too eager to share stories of their children's achievements and every class was a competition instead of a place to learn. Whoever's child answered the questions first was privy to rolling eyes from the other students and awed looks from their parents. It was a toxic atmosphere and that was the reason why, over the years, I'd stopped going at all.

College was very different from elementary school, but the structure of the Open House was unfortunately similar. It was a chance for parents to see what they were getting for the obscene amount of dollars they spent per year, and meet the esteemed professors they'd  heard their children droning on about all year. In short, it would be a gigantic pissing contest, and although it was a terrible prospect, it was necessary.

The morning of, I woke up slightly later than usual, and Nate was already gone. I was thankful for that, because it meant that I didn't have to talk to him. I was afraid of what I might've said if I did.

I took a shower, got dressed, and headed out the door by half-past eight. My recollection of past conversations with Nate, along with information from the school's website, told me that I would make it just in time for his first class of the day, Theories of Language and Literature. The website had also provided helpful information about which building and classroom it would be held in, and which campus parking lot was closest to where I was going, so I was positive that nothing could go wrong. Relatively speaking, of course.

My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, and my heart was beating out of my chest. It was stupid to be afraid, yet I was. Not afraid to see the truth, but of what might come afterward. Every second on the road felt frozen in time, each part of me torn apart and fighting each other for the gold. Stupid on their part too, for in a situation like this — there were no winners.

Like the rest of Westchester, the college town was perched on low, green hills, and the various buildings arose like towers of salt from the grounds. It was, admittedly, quite beautiful. On either side, there was a winding road leading past rows of brick houses and casual eateries, where tiny people danced in and out of vision. On the main campus, students weaved between the grand buildings on which pale strands of ivy were beginning to grow, and congregated on the vast lawns which were perfectly green, and perfectly well-kept. Everyone moved with purpose, and were so engrossed in everything that I felt like an intruder on the picturesque scene. Vaguely, I remembered my own college days, and smiled slightly at the reminder.

The English department was located on the west side of the campus, and it was about a half-mile drive from the main entrance. The roads moved in playful swirls, and about four times I would come across little booths in which a student would kindly ask where I was going and direct me there. I once even passed some sort of fair, and even in the wintry cold the students were jumping up and down, wearing their school colors, and smiling without a care in the world.

Parking, luckily, was easy to find, even with the added presence of the parents. Before I got out of the car, I sat there for a moment, gazing at the scene. The sidewalk and lawn leading up to the building were covered in people; students dressed casually and parents dressed like they were either going to business meetings or balls. They squinted against a sunshine which didn't exist; blocked out by the imposing building they were all lined up against. One-by-one, they disappeared into its depths.

I took a deep breath. I could handle this. I needed to.

I stepped out of the car, following people like an unwanted shadow into the building. Some gave me stares; I didn't look young enough to be a student yet not old enough to be a parent of anyone who went here. I was stuck in a grey area, but they quickly lost interest and returned to themselves as we gathered inside.

The interior was much lovelier and welcoming than the exterior. The walls, between panels of dark wood, were a crisp, velvet red, softly illuminated by the linear rows of lights which led down the hallways. Between each wall was a little more than ten feet of walking space, on which a sea of the same velvet red greeted us in the form of carpet. The tallest of men and women walked comfortably with no fear of having to duck down, and everyone went off in their directions, greeting the teachers who stood by their doors and welcomed people inside.

I spotted Nate before he saw me; he was standing at the very end of the hall, talking animatedly with a man in a dark suit. His eyes were calm, and his facial features were more relaxed than I'd ever seen them I recent times. He looked genuinely happy to be there, and it tore at my heartstrings.

Every step I made toward him, my heart sank more and more. It was itching to sprint into the classroom, to search every face in sight until it found the truth it was looking for. It was so close, yet it felt so far away.

By chance, Nate's eyes landed on my approaching form, and they widened, then darkened. I didn't respond. I was doing my damned hardest just to make sure I was still breathing correctly.

The man Nate was chatting with noticed his distracted look, and followed his eyes to my body. His lips spread into a good natured grin, and he gave Nate a slap on the back.

"And who might this be, Adams?" He said in a teasing voice. Nate's eyes never left mine.

"My wife." Nate sounded somewhat dazed, a sharp contrast from his focused and blazing eyes.

"Oh, my apologies," The man turned towards me, offering his hand. "Nate's told me a lot about you. Lily, right?"

I nodded, taking it while dragging my eyes away from Nate. "Nice to meet you. And you are?"

"Tom. I'm a friend of your husband. We go way back." He nudged Nate slightly but Nate was no longer in a playful mood, and turned back to his friend with a grim expression.

"Will you excuse us for a minute?"

"Sure." Tom nodded, still smiling. "I'll see you inside, alright?"

Tom disappeared into the classroom, and as soon as he did Nate took hold of my arm and began marching me away. Confusion radiated from him in waves, overpowered only by irritation and a slight anger. I didn't bother saying anything, and let him lead me in silence as my heart sunk even more.

Not too far away there was a teacher's lounge, and amidst all the commotion he pulled me inside and closed the door behind us. He turned to me, his expression unreadable.

"What are you doing here?" He asked softly.

I hadn't really expected it to end up like this, rather I thought I'd be able to sneak inside and by the time he saw me wouldn't have been able to do anything, so I swallowed hard. "Well, I had planned to work from home today, but I'd heard that there was an Open House and I wanted to come see you teach, that's all."

He knit his eyebrows together, but his expression didn't change. He took a small step in my direction. "You wanted to watch me teach? Since when?"

I shrugged. "I think I've always wanted to but I never really got the chance to do so, so...here I am."

It was comically bad. I mentally kicked myself for not having the foresight to come up with a better cover story, but luck was on my side today: I was saved by the bell.

"Shit!" Nate cursed loudly. He gave me one last look before mumbling that we could talk more later, and bolted out the door. I followed slowly behind him, my mind more muddled and chaotic than ever before.

I walked into the classroom, and Nate was standing at the front, apologizing for being late and cracking a joke that made everyone laugh. Their eyes were all on him; he was the center of attention.

There were at least fifty people there, crowded on each level, their eyes shining and faces smiling. I saw Tom, and he gave me a wink before focusing back on Nate again. As I walked toward a seat of my own, I studied them.

There were dozens of faces, and across every one there was a spike in my heart rate, followed by the solemn relief that it wasn't her. Across fifty faces, Georgina wasn't one of them.

She wasn't there.

I didn't know what to feel, so I took my seat, and instead focused on the beginning of Nate's lecture. Every so often, his eyes landed on mine, but never long enough for anything concrete to form. It was just a passage, nothing more.

And so I sat there for the duration of the lecture, the noise of Nate, the students, and the woman next to me droning on about her child's achievements nothing compared to the song in my head: she wasn't here.

* * *

I rushed out as soon as the lecture was done, ignoring Nate's calls. He had to teach two more classes in the morning, so he was stuck there, but I needed some fresh air. My mind was fuzzy.

I tried to feel relived at the fact that Georgina wasn't there, but I couldn't. If anything, I felt worse that now she'd remain elusive, a mystery that I couldn't solve. Being in the vicinity of where she and Nate used to...it was too much.

I tried my hardest to fight these thoughts but they ran rampantly through my mind as I headed for the front door. It was incredibly crowded, and I kept bumping into people, so I eventually just decided to hang close to the wall until it started to clear a little. My eyes, which I was sure looked vacant and defeated to anyone who passed by, roamed over the crowd disinterestedly.

A few minutes passed and, for whatever reason, I couldn't say why, I looked over to my far right. Also against the wall, stood a girl, clearly a student, who was struggling to hang a poster on the wall. Even she was getting bumped into, and she let out a frustrated sigh every time it seemed a little crooked. She had soft-looking, chestnut brown hair, and looked deceptively familiar.

She, for whatever reason, maybe she felt my eyes on her, glanced in my direction, and we both froze.

There she was.

It was an incredible intimate moment between wife and mistress. Her eyes, the same midnight blue as they were the day I'd caught her in bed with my husband, widened in both surprise and fear. She didn't dare move.

I approached her slowly, and she stood there motionlessly. Her full, pink lips trembled, but she didn't look away. She didn't move at all until I was directly in front of her, and only then did she release her first breath.

My mouth went incredibly dry. "I want to talk to you." I spoke in a strong voice.

She nodded, but said nothing. A faint hint of curiosity bloomed in her eyes, but it was overshadowed by fear. I quickly looked behind me, to make sure that Nate hadn't come out of his classroom. He hadn't.

"Come on." I gestured towards her, and led the way out of the building. She solemnly followed in silence.

* * *

We went to a nearby café and ordered some coffee. The whole time, I couldn't believe what the hell I was doing, and Georgina seemed to feel the same way, and she looked up at me shyly every so often before lowering them back down to her plate.

Her beauty was astonishing even now, and even with how badly I wanted to reach across the table and throttle her. She was beautiful without even trying, and a bubble of anger formed in my stomach at the notion that she was so much more beautiful than me, enough that Nate felt she was worth it to betray me. I forced those feelings down, as I didn't want a public murder on my hands, and sipped my coffee.

"First, can I just say that I'm really sorry?" Georgina surprised me by murmuring. "I never got the chance to...the night you, um."

I rolled my eyes. "Sure, thanks, I really feel better that you fucked my husband because you said sorry. That fixes everything."

She flinched. "Wait, I — "

"Were you at least using fucking protection?"

"Yes," She blushed furiously, "But — "

"No, I'm not here to talk about that right now. It happened and that's that. I came here because I have some questions for you."

"Okay." She didn't seem to want to leave that topic but she relented and slid down in her seat. If I didn't know what she'd done, I would've felt badly for her.

"Are you still in his class?" I spat.

She looked at me strangely. "What?"

"Don't play dumb with me. I'm nearly at my wit's end with you already." She wasn't so bold now, lowering her eyes yet again. "Are you still in my husband's class?"

"No. I was moved out of his class a little while ago." Her voice struck me as sincere, so I relaxed a little, but not all the way.

"So what were you doing at that building then?" I sounded extremely accusatory, but I couldn't find it in me to care.

"I still have class there, just not with him. And I still have to work there, too. I'm about to transfer to a different building, but that doesn't happen until the end of the semester." She explained softly.

"So you still..." I felt sick. It was incredibly possible that she and Nate still saw each other, still fucked —

"Oh, God, no," she shook her head vehemently. "I've tried my best to spend as little time there as possible after what happened. I don't work with Na — Mr. Adams at all now, and honestly it's for the better."

The way she spoke pissed me off a little. "What do you mean by that?"

"It was a really bad thing to get into; I don't know what I was thinking. I guess I just couldn't help it, but I was so stupid."

"Yeah, about that: how did you start fucking him anyways?" I'd heard Nate's version, but I wanted to hear it coming from Georgina herself.

Her cheeks flushed. "Well, I needed to start a job somewhere, because my family can't really afford to pay for tuition here. Mr. Adams was looking for an assistant, and I was doing really well in his class and he recommended me even though I was pretty young for that. All I had to do was help grade papers so I figured it was doable, and I had to help out pretty much every day after class ended. We just started talking...and it got a little more intimate than a student-teacher relationship was supposed to."

The images of Nate talking to her sweetly, her shy blush forming on her face nearly sent me over the edge. It sounded so...so wrong that it took everything I had not to run out of the shop. I swallowed hard.

"And did you initiate the relationship? Or did he?"

"I don't know," She blushed even harder, "I guess it was a mutual thing, even though I knew it was wrong and I'd get in trouble. I couldn't help it."

"And it didn't bother you at all that he was married?" My voice took on a hard edge.

She looked at me dead-on, and her face fell. Her eyes flickered nervously. "See, that was thing... I didn't really know about you when I..."

"Bullshit." My jaw clenched. "He's wearing his ring. How the hell could you not have known?"

"Okay, okay, he did say that he was married but I swear to God I didn't know you were still together! He told me that you were separated."

My entire world stopped.

"What?" I said dumbly.

Georgina looked at me miserably. "He told me that you were separated, that you were getting divorced soon so it didn't matter. I thought it was kind of weird that he was still wearing his ring, but I believed him."

I almost wanted to call her out on it — but then the image of our first meeting slipped into my mind. The look she'd been wearing as she walked out of the bedroom: curiosity. Wondering why I was there.

Getting divorced soon.

White hot anger began to seep through my veins, and I asked darkly, "So I suppose he didn't tell you that we have children either?"

Her jaw dropped, full of genuine shock. Nothing about it was exaggerated or fake. "You two have kids?" She whispered, a horrified look coming across her face.

That son of a bitch.

The image of Nate in my mind made me want to throw my mug across the fucking room. He had told her that we were about to get divorced and didn't have any kids? The pain and the anger began to consume me, but I aggressively forced it down. Not yet, I wasn't done with her.

"I really am sorry," Georgina muttered, holding her head in her hands. "I had no idea."

"It's alright." As angry as I was, this wasn't her fault. She'd fallen for Nate, an equal participant in the affair, and he'd lied to her in order to gain her trust. She hadn't deliberately tried to ruin our family, and judging by her posture — she felt awful about it.

She raised her head, a haunted look in her eyes as she stared at me. "You two really do have children?"

"A girl and a boy." I nodded.

"Jesus." She leaned back in her seat. She looked dumbfounded.

"Jesus, indeed."

We sat there for a little while in stunned silence. The cafe was beginning to fill up, but we saw and heard nothing but each other. The real villain in all this was Nate, and we were just pawns in his game.

I sighed, stirring my coffee a bit. "Nate already talked to me about this, but I want to hear it from you: was that the only time you'd been in my house?"

"Yes, the first and only time." She nodded.

"Okay," I breathed a sigh of relief. "And...are you still seeing each other? Or was that the end of your relationship?"

"No, I ended it that same night. He actually tried to continue it, but I told him that I wouldn't even consider it unless he told me the truth about who you were. I actually tried to get him to give me your phone number so I could explain everything, but he refused." She gave me a gentle look. "I can show you the messages if you want."

I shook my head absentmindedly. I didn't need to see them, I believed her, "So he told you that I was his wife and that was it?"

"Yeah. I stopped texting him, but he tried talking me for a few days afterwards. He was kind of scaring me, and I was about to ask to be removed from his class when someone from administration told me that I was getting kicked out. Funny coincidence, huh?"

I felt my own face heat up a bit. "About that... I may or may not have been responsible for you getting kicked out of his class. Sorry about that."

"It's okay." A soft, bittersweet smile formed on her face. "I would've done the same thing if I were in your position." The haunted look covered her eyes again.

In another circumstance, another time, I would've talked to her longer, but I still could not see her apart from the woman Nate had chosen over me. She seemed to feel the same way, and the haunted look didn't leave her eyes until we went our separate ways, hopefully, forever.

Meanwhile, as I drove into the sunshine, I drew my focus from her, and onto the real issue at hand. The lies and the deceit that Nate had told me were too much; he played me like a fool and an uncontainable fire arose in my stomach.

My hands shook. My legs wobbled. My smile twitched. Yet I'd never felt more powerful and angrier than I did now.

And when Nate got home to his little wife, oh boy, there'd be absolute hell to pay.

* * *

Holy shit lol! Hope you enjoyed this super long chapter! There is lots to talk about this time! What's your opinion of Georgina now? And how about Nate?

I hope you all have a wonderful rest of your Christmas/Hanukkah/Break and I love you all!

xoxo,
twyla