"Are you going to eat that?" Hoseok asked coming up behind Namjoon. He dropped the cupcake on the table due to being startled.

"I guess not then." He grinned looking down.

Namjoon panicked and grabbed a napkin trying to clean up the blue frosting. "You-you scared me." He said.

"My bad. I mean you did come with us to the dinner so did you expect me to not try to talk to you?"

"I mean yeah it's just uh-" Namjoon stopped talking to place the messy cupcake back where he got it from.

"Maybe they won't notice." He added looking back at Hoseok who bursted out laughing and covering his mouth.

Namjoon smiled satisfied. Hearing Hoseok laugh was priceless and he wanted to always be able to be cause of that.

"You are trying to avoid talking to me and change the conversation right now aren't you? As soon as  Jin went with his dad to answer questions you ran away from me."

"I'm sorry. I just don't know how to talk to both of you at the same time."

"I see that. And that's why as soon as Jin walked away you too ran away from me. Do I make you nervous?"

Very.

"No."

"Liar."

"Okay yes," he shyly admitted.

"Aha! I knew it! Wait why? I'm the nice one in the relationship."

"It's still odd that you are okay with me liking Jin. I still feel ashamed for meeting him behind your back." He admitted.

"You're an escort. It's your job. I mean don't you like me too?" He wondered.

A random person approached the food table and they both stopped talking and turned to smile at him.

The guy reached over to get a cupcake but then stopped when he saw the messy one in the center.

"Someone must've stuck their hand in there and put it back. People these days." Hoseok told.

"Ugh." He replied disgusted.

"You can try the vegetables and salads on that other table their excellent."

"Thank you!" He said walking away.

Namjoon and Hoseok giggled like little kids until Hoseok playfully smacked his stomach. "Hey,"

"Hi," Namjoon responded a bit breath taken. It's not the fact that Hoseok had playfully smacked him, it was the fact that he had touched him.

Even though he didn't feel aroused by the action he did feel his heart glow. The butterflies in his tummy kicked in as well.

"Jin told me you're a vegan or something like that. He tried to explain but got all confused. Can you explain? I mean I was once a vegan and I a hundred percent support all the vegans because it's a great thing. I just can't stay away from chicken."

"No, I'm not vegan. I eat meat...just not yours." He whispered.

Hoseok gasped a mortified look on his face. "Did Seokjin tell you about that weird ass mole on my dick? I'm going to kill him! It's not as bad as he makes it sound. I promise!" He whispered screamed both embarrassed and angry.

"Jin-Jin-didn't tell me about that."

Hoseok pressed his lips together looking down at his shoes. "Well, fuck. I guess now you know about that."

Namjoon wanted to laugh so he took a deep breath to contain himself. "Anyways, umm, back to the conversation." Hoseok said quickly trying to turn the attention away from his dick mole.

"I'm asexual." Namjoon stated.

"Hmm. Elaborate more please. I've heard about it some I just want to know what's your definition of it."

"It means that I do not have sex. It's not you or Jin or anyone really. It's just my presence. I don't desire to be sexually active."

"Oh, okay, see that was not what Jin said. I mean he tried to explain it as best as he could. I just got confused with the vegan and the sex and yeah."

"Well, now you know. Jin didn't mind it. I hope that you..."

"No. It's fine. I've never met an asexual before so it's going to be hard adjusting to your preferences considering you're part of our relationship now."

"I am?" Namjoon asked fluttering his eyelashes.

"But of course, silly."

"Yay." He whispered with a shy smile.

"Can I ask you a question? I'm pretty sure Jin has already flooded you with them."

"It's fine. Ask away. I don't mind answering your questions."

"Have you been sexually active before?" He asked leaning closer. Namjoon looked around to make sure there weren't people close by.

"I have before. When I was sixteen. I didn't like it. Looking back at it now I feel like I felt forced to have sex to keep that person with me. It was awful." He shook his head.

Hoseok smiled sympathetically and wrapped his arms around Namjoon's arm. He then got on his tippy toes and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"It's fine, love, you don't have to worry about us forcing you to do none of that."

•••

"Hey, I gotta go pee." Yoongi told Jeongyeon who was currently stuffing her face with a chicken leg.

"Are you sure you don't have to poop?" She joked.

"Girl, you know I don't poop in public places. I'm booshie. I only receive blowjobs and handjobs in the public bathrooms." He smirked.

Jeongyeon covered her mouth with a napkin. "Nasty ass."

"You brought it up. Okay, I will be right back." He quickly said heading towards the bathroom. When he saw a single bathroom he sighed relieved.

He didn't really want to go into the bigger one and bump into Jimin. How awkward would that be?

Before going in he knocked obnoxiously loud. He really needed to go. When no one answer he went in straight to the toilet.

He was in the middle is emptying his bladder when someone came in causing him to squeal and pee all over the wall.

"Fuck."

"Stop following me." Jimin said crossing his arms over his chest.

"What? What the fuck? Can you-can you look away?" He said a bit panicked.

Jimin tilted his head and smirked. "Okay." He finally said turning around when he felt a blush creeping up his neck.

Yoongi was done and that's when he realized that there wasn't a urinal anywhere. He flushed the toilet a bit embarrassed. "You're in the girls bathroom you pervert." Jimin said like he was reading his mind.

He turned to face him when he didn't feel his face blush.  "I really had to go." Yoongi quietly told.

They looked at each other for a couple of minutes. It wasn't until Yoongi raised his hands in the air and walked to the sink that the eye contact broke.

"I have dick germ hands."

"Were you planning to touch me or something?" Jimin teased.

Yoongi scrubbed his hands harder. How did Jimin have so much control over his emotions? How was he able to speak to him like nothing had happened?

"Calm down. I'm only kidding."

Yoongi nodded and dried his hands with a paper towel. "Why're you here?" He wondered confused.

"Why are you following me?"

"Me? You're the one that came in here."

"You're following me!" He accused pointing his finger at him like a little kid.

"Okay." Yoongi stated. He really didn't want to fight with him. He only wanted to hold him in his arms again. That's all.

Jimin brought his finger down and swallowed the lump on his throat. His eyes were stinging with hot tears.

"You lied to me. This is why I cant trust you." He said with bitterness.

"What did I lie to you about?" He calmly responded. He didn't want to hurt him the way he had before.

"You said you liked me and there you are all over that girl. You said you two weren't dating for real. You lied!"

"I never lied. Jeongyeon is my friend. I would give up my left nut for her to be in love with me and viceversa. But that's not the case and you know it."

Jimin looked down at the floor and tried to control his breathing. "You know what? At the end of the day you can do whatever you want because you're not my husband anymore and we're nothing."

"I haven't taken off the ring. I won't either. I'm not letting go as easily as you are." Yoongi said stretching his hand out for him to see.

Jimin groaned, "Whatever."

"I don't understand you. You're contradicting yourself."

"I was just kidding! About the Jeongyeon shit I was kidding. It's a joke! You really have to learn how to take jokes." He said as tears streamed down his face.

Yoongi stepped closer and wiped his tears with his thumbs. "Don't worry. My hands are dick germ free."

Jimin laughed while he cried. He didn't think he needed his touch so bad. He melted his face against his hand.

"Why're you pushing me away?" Yoongi wondered.

Jimin opened his eyes and shrugged. "Because it's not worth it."

"Why can't we try?"

Jimin pulled away and waled across the room. He wiped his own tears then slid down on the cold floor. He brought his knees close to his chest as he quietly sobbed.

Yoongi felt like his heart had been ripped right out his chest at that moment. Seeing Jimin cry and break down physically hurt.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you." He whispered sitting next to him. He reached over to try to touch him but stopped himself.

His hands were shaking and he didn't know how to make it better. He didn't know how to make him stop hurting.

That feeling was the worst. To not be able to help a person you care about. Yoongi was completely helpless.

"I'm the fucked up one." Jimin said in between cries.

"No, don't-don't say that. No one is perfect. It's okay to feel bad at times. You're only human, Jimin. Allow yourself to feel." He cooed.

Jimin looked up and then quickly laid his head on Yoongi's belly. He had his arms wrapped around his waist like a needy baby while he let his emotions out.

"I'm really okay. There's nothing wrong. I'm just being over dramatic. When I drink I get carried away and get all emotional for no reason." He said closing his eyes.

Yoongi softly ran his fingers through his hair. "Don't say that. Stop blaming yourself for not being okay. Don't say you're overdramatic or seeking attention because you're not. You are free to feel whatever the fuck you want. I don't care that feel broken or sad. I still like you for you. I like all parts of you whether you're happy, angry, sad or whatever. I like all you."

Jimin sighed relieved snuggling closer to him. "You better never wash this shirt. You've got golden tears all over it." He said with a sad smile.

"Don't worry. I'll never wash it." Yoongi reassured.

"I like your tummy." Jimin told.

"Cool. I like you." Yoongi said. He looked down at him who had his eyes closed. He looked like a vulnerable baby.

All he wanted was to be loved. It was evident and Yoongi could tell. He proceeded to rub small circles on his back.

"Hey,"

"Hmm?"

"Why did you really come talk to to me?"

Jimin opened his eyes and slightly shrugged, "I don't know. I'm a tipsy mess and all I really wanted to do is just be here with you."

Yoongi smiled, "I'm glad." His heart was beating so fast because he had a lingering question he wanted to ask Jimin. And at a moment the urge kicked in and he got the courage to ask.

"Do you...do you want to ditch this shitty dinner with me?"

•••

i fixed the typos from the previous chapter ;o guys i be writing these during work so excuse the ones i dont catch. much love to you my luvssss. also stream "Black Swan" mv <3