"we how are you doing this morning, rowyn?" doctor hudson took a seat across from her, two teacups were sitting in front of them. her therapist not hesitating to take a sip of the pumpkin spice chai tea

rowyn shrugged, "fine." she answered dryly sounding grouchy, she didn't get a ton of sleep last night. dinner at her aunt's house was a blast, they had the best time which ended up with rowyn sleeping over. nova couldn't say no plus she could see how much she missed her auntie

she got enough sleep last night but was still exhausted for whatever reason. it probably has to do with the fact that she has been up since four o'clock this morning, practicing her lines for the play. this week, they are having a fancy dinner with the school board members. scarlett is helping her pick out the cutest outfits, excited that rowyn is allowing her to be apart of her biggest moments

"so i think we should start off with why are you here today—-"

rowyn interrupted her, "you know why i'm here mrs. hudson. because of what i did to holly plus this is my "punishment" for what i did." rowyn answered air quoting the word punishment

"this isn't a punishment, rowyn." mrs. hudson said with patience, rowyn shook her head disagreeing, "definitely feels like it...." she retorted in a low voice, she sounded like she was ready to go. she'd much rather be in first period right now than to be here but at least these sessions are excused

"let's talk about you..." mrs. hudson made sure to keep strict eye contact with rowyn who barley looked at her, "how are you feeling today?"

"i'm stressing." rowyn answered. "how come?"

"i have a play i'm starring in next week and it's a very serious topic...." rowyn began to nervously rub her leg trailing off for a moment, her therapist making sure not to interrupt her, "i don't know just nervous and want things to go well."

"there's nothing wrong with being nervous, have you ever been this nervous before when pertaining to school clubs or activities?"

"our heartstopper play that we put on was the last time i felt my heart beat out of its chest honestly." she answered

"how does it feel when you're on stage?" rose asked with interest, she was trying to get a feel of rowyn. "i feel like myself, no worries in the world. it feels as if i'm in a different world when on stage." she stopped herself from smiling while discussing what is slowly beginning to become her passion

"do you want to purse a career in acting?"

rowyn nodded, "i would love too but my parents want me to be a lawyer or surgeon."

"but what do you want to do?" rowyn frowned shocked to see rose dismiss her parents, "i want to make my parents proud."

"you would sacrifice doing something you might not love in order to please or make them both happy?" rowyn bit her lip in shame not saying anything, rose had her answer

"you need to start doing for you, not anybody else." those words stuck with rowyn for majority of the day at school, when lunch time appeared, riley went to ask her how her session went with her mom. rowyn told her it went well which it actually did.

principal sinclair called mrs. hudson asking about the session, obviously there wasn't going to be a 360 done with one session but she told him she got way further than she thought she would have today. that was a good thing to the principal, after school, her and darius had rehearsal that went well

after that, she was at the thatcher's. she took a shower then spent some time with amelia, it felt like old times as that sat at the kitchen counter eating baked goodies. amelia still was having a hard time processing that rowyn did what she did to holly but she knew it had to have been with good reasoning

when chase got home from a late practice, he went to shower then the two were where they always are when she tutors him. both not speaking to each other, rowyn didn't have anything to say to him after that disagreement they had over the weekend

meanwhile chase had so much to say to her, watching her write something down in her five star notebook, "rowyn?" he said, she just hummed refusing to look up

"i'm sorry about what i said to you this weekend. i was out of line." chase said sounding candid

rowyn sighed sitting her pen and notebook down giving him her full attention, "it's okay. i'm sorry too, i was also out of line."

chase chuckled, "you weren't. you were right." rowyn was lost not understanding his drift, "you are too good to be with someone like me."

"i'm too good? what do you mean?" rowyn shrugged, she genuinely couldn't see what he was trying to say.

"i'm not on your level—" rowyn fluttered her eyes, "i don't——-"

"you are a great person who has some hardships. plus the endless pouring of talent you have within yourself is honestly admirable, you strive for greatness. and i have no doubt you are going to be somebody when you graduate. fooling with someone like me would only harbor you or hold you back." chase claimed sounding sincere

"you're going to be somebody too chase. plus you are an awesome person yourself—-"

"rowyn let's not lie————-"

"i'm not lying to you chase." she finished her sentence, chase laughed having a hard time believing her. he knew she was just trying to be nice in this moment, "it's clear you are a nice guy but something has happened to you." rowyn called out with gentleness

chase spoke up, "nothing has happened to me."

rowyn grew irritated, "chase. for once in your life, just cut the tough guy act." he sighed not expecting those words to come out of her mouth, he was flabbergasted not knowing what to say

"it's okay to be vulnerable and you don't have to tell me what has happened to you but something definitely has."

silence lingered throughout the room for a few minutes, "you should talk to someone. because the way that you treat your parents is unacceptable." rowyn knew she probably was crossing the line but he needed to hear that

"how so?" chase asked with mockery

"they aren't going to be here forever, you'll eventually regret treating them like this. you actually have great parents, realize that sooner than later." rowyn tried to advise

"they aren't that great." chase tried to argue

"i'd kill to have parents like yours chase. you're just an ungrateful, spoiled and conceited brat. you have it good, not many of us have it like you. it could always be worse."

chase started to feel bad beginning to think about the kind of parents rowyn has. he couldn't imagine what it is like living under their roof, he imagines that it is pure hell.....

"you're right." chase fixed his tone

"let's just get back to this assignment." rowyn quickly changed the subject, chase felt even worser. he suddenly stood up going to sit next to rowyn who side eyed him

"how did therapy go?" he asked, the reason he knew about it was because her parents brought it up to his parents at church after service yesterday

"it actually went well."

"you opened up to someone other than your close friends?" chase asked sounding surprised, rowyn had to laugh at his tone of voice. "i did, i felt better doing that which is why maybe you should consider setting up an appointment with mrs. hudson. she actually listens to you plus gives great advice."

"it'll be a cold day in hell before i go see a therapist."

ya'll please forgive me for being so late with updates on this. i'm currently writing a new book based off a 90s movie then i have a ryan reynolds/jenna ortega book i'm working on. i stay writing a million books at once and it gets overwhelming at times, i stay doing this to myself lmao but i thank you all for being so patient with me.

back to antlers.... do you guys think something has happened to chase, if so what do you think possibly has??? i love you all and hope you have a great new years 🤍