Several hours, after the signing, High Minister Han left the banquet, He walked the parameters, always checking security. The hall was full of people who were important to him and their continued health was paramount. At one juncture, a lone Guardian stood and as he passed Lan Sya Mu, who guarded the door closest to the Lan table on the other side, he nodded to her. She nodded back, never losing focus. He paused and backtracked to her.

"Thank you for your attention here."

She looked a little puzzled. "I am personal Guardian to Chieftain Anshi. Where else would I be?" Her tone was faintly astonished at the absurdity of his statement.

He smiled. "True. Guardian Lan Sya Mu. I recognize the devotion. He is irreplaceable. Is he not?"

She looked directly into the cool gray eyes. "Absolutely."

He returned her gaze. "I have long wanted to speak with you, Lan Sya Mu."

"What about?" She was finding this conversation hard. The last person she imagined having any real contact with, was the person who owned Anshi's heart. She held her face immobile, striving for calm and the ability to stay perfectly clear-headed. The man was known for his intelligence and persuasiveness. She tried to detect any duplicity, yet he was impossible to read.

"About Anshi."

"Why?"

"Because, I notice things quicker than most."

The hair rose on the back of her neck. "It is a good trait to have High Minister but I certainly hope you always analyze what you see first and do not jump to conclusions."

"At all times. For instance, I have, since I first came to Cloud Recesses during the Meng episode, noticed your devotion."

"It is my duty."

"Your attention to duty is extremely obvious."

She drew in a breath. "High Minister. Speak plainly, I am not adept at hints and innuendo."

He smiled. " I am not trying to be intriguing or mysterious, Guardian. So I will speak directly. Anshi will take the Caravan in spring and leave..." His voice faltered a moment. She waited, unsure of where this man was going.

"I will, most probably, never see him again. Sya Mu, this is difficult for me. I have cared for this man...loved him ...for many years. I do not have the capability to hide this."

"Why speak to me of such things? This is between my Chieftain and yourself."

"Because, I have known since the first day I saw you guarding his person, that you feel the same way as I do."

Lan Sya Mu's eyes widened, and she whirled to face Han fully on. "What did you...why would you...?"

"Because I love him in the same way. I see the same longing. I sense your pain. I have walked in your shoes and I know."

She suddenly felt exposed, her one foundation, that not a soul knew except Dawa Tuya, was suddenly shaken, and she strove to regain her focus. "I have never... I have always been professional. I resent your implication."

Han smiled in sympathy. "I would never dare to imply. You have chosen to be in his sphere, despite the cost to yourself. You do not care in what way. The nearness matters, even if you see him happy with another, even if you sacrifice your own life in place of his. I have lived it, Sya Mu, just as you do now. In a few months, as the weather warms, and it is time for the Caravan to move on, I will live it again. When Winter ends, so will our life together. I will lose the man I have loved since childhood. I have my own sworn duty to fulfill, just as he does."

She asked, "What is it that you want of me? He loves you. It pierces my soul, but I am not a love-stuck and foolish child, as my cousin was. I have accepted my reality. He will always love you. He feels too deeply, my Chieftain does, and will not recover from you. He does not see anyone but you, so your separation will mean nothing. I can only protect his body. I cannot heal his sorrows."

"Anshi has an enormous heart. I am his first, but I am not to be his only love. He is destined to find a woman to love, marry, and have children with. They will save his murdered bloodline together. I am saying only this. Stand by him. Keep being his Guardian. I will feel better knowing someone who loves him as much as I do, and in the same way, will be there for him. Someone who loves him unconditionally. I ask only that, and it is an impossible thing for anyone to endure. But I beg this of you."

She wiped an angry tear from her face, no longer stoic. No longer carved from stone. It was the tortured face of pure commitment to a lost cause. She had never had a choice since the day she had seen Anshi.

She rasped at him, voice hoarse as she strove for control. "Why would you even ask? It has been my life's sworn vocation for two years. Your plea makes no difference. He is always the one I would give my life for."

His smile grew sad. "Because, deep in my own heart, I would want the person who most loves him like I do, to also win his heart one day. He deserves nothing less. And neither do you.'

Then he turned and walked back toward the Great Hall, his heart bleeding but his soul less burdened.

For one brief moment, she allowed herself to lean against the wall behind her. She felt a sudden surge of empathy for the man Anshi loved. The High Minister was right, they both loved him and would do anything for him. And Han was now facing a lifetime of loneliness again. How could he bear it, yet at the same time, hope for a hopeless miracle for her?

Whatever the fates had in store for the three of them, it was shrouded in mystery. But she found herself praying for them to be kind to the man who was walking slowly away. She saw him pause, square his shoulders, and enter the door to the gaiety ensuing within. She pushed away from the wall and stood at attention.

They both had their duty to attend to tonight.